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#1 L.A. Vocal apologist

@electricgnu

erin/gnu, she/her, empty jump throw

2,992 posts

5h

oh my pretty new mutants 2019 color. yippee

8h

worshiping at the church of Our Lady Of The Ambiguous Jump-In

Jul 24

honestly fandom has ruined me because now any time i'm in the desert and i see two vast and trunkless legs of stone or a half-sunk shattered visage i'm like "omg just like in Ozymandias" and its like come on girl not every half-sunk shattered visage is Ozymandias

Jul 24

tokon. tokon will save me. save me tokon.

you know what? i actually think it will

Jul 24

tokon. tokon will save me. save me tokon.

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

i must say i do like how rahnes neck brand is an upside down W, you know, M for mutant. like bishop. that works well

the creepy smile guys got less creepy when they took the masks off

i do not like illyana/berto i must say

aww hi lockheed

and just like the comics, illyana comes in from out of nowhere and oneshots the demon bear. with her armor on the wrong side.

it’s ok everyone, roberto saves the day cause sam called him a pussy

and it ends with a beautiful narration of that old racist ass two bears/wolves shit again. what a nice little bow to put on top of everything. ahh a dog shit movie that everyone told me was dog shit and i watched it and it was dog shit. a movie that fails to stand on its own merit and fails to function as an adaptation of any of the comics it pays lip service to.

but it did give us danirahne on screen in living color. so credit where it’s due on that one point. everything else was lackluster and uninspired. i think in a word this movie could be called weightless. for the ostensible child abuse + trauma movie i think we skirted around a lot of stuff and resolved a lot of other stuff really fast.

i do confess to a little bit of a soft spot i can feel forming in me for this movie if only because like those are my kids. my awesome new mutant children. i love them. save them from this 5/10 movie. read a comic book.

#just a question if illyana can stepping disc why can’t she escape? disc to limbo and disc out off campus. whatever #and id like to retract an earlier question i had it seems pretty clear sam broke his wrist punching himself. sorry sam #new mutants

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

i must say i do like how rahnes neck brand is an upside down W, you know, M for mutant. like bishop. that works well

the creepy smile guys got less creepy when they took the masks off

i do not like illyana/berto i must say

aww hi lockheed

and just like the comics, illyana comes in from out of nowhere and oneshots the demon bear. with her armor on the wrong side.

it’s ok everyone, roberto saves the day cause sam called him a pussy

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

i must say i do like how rahnes neck brand is an upside down W, you know, M for mutant. like bishop. that works well

the creepy smile guys got less creepy when they took the masks off

i do not like illyana/berto i must say

aww hi lockheed

and just like the comics, illyana comes in from out of nowhere and oneshots the demon bear. with her armor on the wrong side.

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

i must say i do like how rahnes neck brand is an upside down W, you know, M for mutant. like bishop. that works well

the creepy smile guys got less creepy when they took the masks off

i do not like illyana/berto i must say

aww hi lockheed

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

i must say i do like how rahnes neck brand is an upside down W, you know, M for mutant. like bishop. that works well

the creepy smile guys got less creepy when they took the masks off

i do not like illyana/berto i must say

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

i must say i do like how rahnes neck brand is an upside down W, you know, M for mutant. like bishop. that works well

the creepy smile guys got less creepy when they took the masks off

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

i must say i do like how rahnes neck brand is an upside down W, you know, M for mutant. like bishop. that works well

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

it will redeem this movie fully if i get to see mr sinister in full costume on my screen. show me the strip-cape shoulder pads

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

i understand that this is an adaptation and it doesn’t have to line up 100% with the comic books but i think things are being lost in translation here

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

wow the idea that dani manifested rahne as part of her illusion power goes so crazy.

aah! evil julianna!

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

let’s go lesbians!!!

Jul 24

starting the 2020 new mutants movie. this will surely be good

the literal opening to the movie is dani voiceover being like: inside you there are two bears. a nice bear.... and a Demon Bear. yeah this is gonna be dogshit

hold up i knew about lightskin berto but why is dr reyes so light? this is crazy

woww berto is so white i thought he was sam at first glance

ok i knew about illyana's weird lockheed hand puppet thing beforehand but now im in all new territory. lets dive in to group therapy with the fucked up children

yo illyana why would you say that shit

frankly it’s strange to cast dani as the new kid on the block. like this would have been much more serviceable if it was following berto or illyana integrating into the team given everyone’s relative ages. or just have everyone know each other from the start. why does dani have to be the one to integrate

suicide attempt prevented by the power of lesbians i know that’s right

thats not my sam guthrie. my sam is 6’5” and 100 pounds soaking wet and hair like dry spaghetti. this kids like normal looking

and how’d he dislocate his shoulder anyway? the guy is famously invulnerable while blastin’

the illyana situation is getting worse.

*eminem throwing flashbang image* Go my bad looking cgi bear

mah daddy gave me this lump of coal cause he worked in the coal mine oh my god his dad actually gave him the lump of coal

this is one of the most jarring fun-having montages i’ve ever seen

#1 L.A. Vocal apologist @electricgnu - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag