Life Is Beautiful

If I like it, it gets posted here. Random blog. Anything that makes me smile. INTP | Asexual/aromantic | Nonbinary | Goth | ADHD | Recent college grad. Healing from depression. It does get better.

[eli-ascends]

Made a cake for my coworker’s going away party. She really likes baby Yoda so I tried my best.

[evilkitten3]

now that i think about it, jonathan harker would’ve been a great character in frankenstein. he’s so completely oblivious to dracula’s red flag parade that he’d probably completely avert the creature’s murderous rampage by accidentally befriending him after spending a page and a half writing about some weirdly tall homeless guy with daddy issues he ran into

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

“I’ve met the most peculiar man today. He was far taller in height than I have ever witnessed before. His face gave off a general sense of ugliness, though I cant quite place why considering he seems to be quite handsome when not in animation. A multitude of scars seemed to cover his body, perhaps from a terrible accident and the subsistent surgeries. I’ve noticed that he always looks close to crying. When i asked his name, he replied, in length, that he had none. How queer! As he seemed fairly harmless, and rather in need, I invited him to accompany me on my passage to Count Dracula. He looked bewildered, but accepted. I know not whether he shall continue to accompany me when I return to Mina, but I’m quite certain she would never reject hospitality to so miserable a man!”

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

Also consider:

My dearest Margaret, so odd a stranger has joined my ship! I know nothing of him other than he seems to be some sort of European, like Victor, though not the same. He introduced himself as Count Dracula, and spoke with utmost clarity and mastery of the english language. Victor looked upon him in a rather fragile state and cried out.

“Is one demon not enough for my so miserable life? Must another specter haunt my every waking hour, even now as I am so wretched? Oh, save me Walton, save me! The devil comes near, and he dost wish to smother all hope of respite and tranquility!”

Saying such, he leaped from where he was seated on the deck, and promptly fainted. I apologized for my friend’s behavior and brought Victor back to my cabin.

Sincerely, your confused brother, Robert. W

[brain-depositary]

You know, considering Victor’s extensive experience with dismembering dead bodies and reanimating and the fact that his problem for his entire book was that he didn’t think anyone would believe him, I do sincerely think that Frankenstein would catch onto Dracula’s deal at once and immediately make it everyone else’s problem.

[evilkitten3]

victor accidentally fucking up dracula while jonathan accidentally un-fucks up the creature? sign me the hell up!

[brain-depositary]

All these posts declaring that Victor would only be able to cry and faint at Dracula seem to forget that his first meeting with his creature started with him hurling insults and trying to fistfight the 8 ft tall supernatural brick shithouse of muscle while having the constitution of a consumptive heroine so like while this absolutely wouldn’t bode well for his long term survival in Dracula’s castle you’ve gotta admit it would be way funnier.

Essentially the creature would find the one guy who’s too polite to say anything about his appearance while Dracula to his horror would have met the one man in the world who’s even more of a fucking nightmare to deal with than him.

[brain-depositary]

Frankenstein, eyes bloodshot and probably on totally normal Victorian amounts of cocaine: “Hey buddy count I found all these fresh cadavers in your basement —“

Dracula: “Vait how did you find my cadavers”

Frankenstein: “Look, I need them for reasons and you just had them laying around and were obviously not using them and they’re peasants right? So —“

Dracula: “Vhat do you possibly need cadavers for?”

Frankenstein: “I already told you, REASONS! Anyway I can’t help but notice all of them are totally drained of blood and I need the blood.”

Dracula: “how are you getting them out of the ground so quickly, you’re like a hundred pounds soaking vet —“

Frankenstein: “THE BLOOD, Dracula. I need the BLOOD. WHERE THE FUCK IS THE BLOOD. TELL ME, DRAC.”

[brain-depositary]

Later:

Frankenstein: *long winded flowery speech about how Count Dracula is a fiendish devil and vile abomination etc for what he’s done to the corpses*

Dracula: My brother in Christ YOU’RE the one robbing MY graveyard!!!

Frankenstein: *suckerpunches him*

[evilkitten3]

you’re the only person on this post i trust. please never stop i love you

[three--rings]

For all those newly obsessed by Johnathan Harker’s Worst Business Trip Ever, I have to tell you about my favorite piece of published Dracula fanfic, The Dracula Tape by Fred Saberhagen. 

The premise is that Dracula accosts some folks in the 1970s in order to give His side of the story and it’s recorded on a tape deck. 

It’s hilarious though, because it’s basically like “Look, Johnathan Harker had No Idea what was going on.  He didn’t even speak the language, but somehow he claims to know what people were saying to him?  Cause he knows a few German words?”  And like “look I was just an innocent vampire trying to buy some property and he jumped to All Kinds of conclusions, really.”

And like it makes…a lot of good points about the novel, actually.  (Like it wasn’t ME that killed Lucy, maybe it was those experimental blood transfusions that didn’t pay any attention to BLOOD TYPE, VAN HELSING.)

So yeah, highly recommend it after you’ve read the original. 

[bowieography]

[eli-ascends]

Same vibe

[timberva]

THE SHERLOCK MUSICAL IS OUT AND FREE ON YOUTUBE

[pillowpetsounds-deactivated2025]

someone on *ahem* reddit discovered a goodreads page for toki’s book

and here are some of the reviews:

[eli-ascends]

Oh my god, I clicked the link and it’s actually real!

[spitzonthefritz]

this is going around twitter rn but im also super curious: please tell me your top four comfort movies that you’re always down to watch bc my friend thinks mine are ridiculous and now we’ve realised everyone’s version of “comfort” is hilariously different

[eli-ascends]

Forbidden Kingdom, Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Van Helsing, and Deadpool

[terminallyhopeful]

the greatest proposal in history actually

[grifalinas]

Menstrual products with “For Men” packaging

[grifalinas]

The wrappers are black or gunmetal and the boxes have like. Bears and shit on them. Manly products for your manhood! For men!

[grifalinas]

MEN! Does your manhood leak B L O O D every month? Do you spend three to ten days of the month shedding the blood of your defeated enemy? Try our Man-strual products! Pads and tampons for that MANLIEST time of the month! For men!

[romantorchdick]

All the people reblogging this to say “I know this is a joke but-” no it’s not, I genuinely want this, the only reason you think it’s a joke is because I like humor in advertising and am extremely funny

[eli-ascends]

Not to get serious, but that would also be cool for trans men

[translucentchick]

I love Final Fantasy 7

[eli-ascends]

🤣

[littoldumbace]

Realizing you’re aspec be like

[eli-ascends]

Can someone tell me what you call the aesthetic of Devil’s Candy? that sort of cutesy goth with more of a mad scientist vibe?? Cuz I love it.

Like it’s not pastel goth or even really kawaii goth; it’s something else.

[piperderg-deactivated20221106]

Please boost this!

[fairycontessa]

From the website’s FAQ:

“Who is this for? Full Cart is perfect for hard working individuals and families looking for a way to extend their grocery budget.

Why is there no charge for the groceries? Full Cart partners with generous companies and organizations you know and love to cover the cost of your meals. All you pay is shipping.“

This makes my heart happy (and less stressed)

[jay-kwellyn]

Stay blessed y’all

[enberlight]

If you’re in better circumstances, you can also support the site by funding meals for others.

[the-amber-droid-dreams]

ID 1 : A reddit post from r/Assistance by u/agongidi that reads :

If you or someone you know is struggling to buy groceries. RESOURCE

If you or someone you know is struggling to buy groceries. I highly encourage you to check out fullcart.org. Use promo code “climate” to get the Signature Box - 32 lunch/dinner servings. 12 side dish servings. 15 breakfast servings. 6 snackservings. and 3 fresh produce items for $4.99 delivered!

No strings. no obligation. food delivered by fedex usually within 3 days. It’s a great program.

No one should go hungry.

ID 2 : A screencap from the Full Cart website that reads : Provide Help

With your generous donation, we can send food directly to families who have been affected by COVID-19. A donation of just $15 wil I feed a family of three for up to a week. Click the link below to make an impact!

DONATE NOW. END ID]

[eli-ascends]

Curly-Straight-Curly-Curly-Straight | #shorts

Curly-Straight-Curly-Curly-Straight | #shorts

The accent only makes it better

[queercbc]

Goth Girl Appreciation Post

[jaunes-hoodie]

You know what trope I love? Skeleton characters that aren't evil, they're just chill. Like, upon first glance, they seem like they would be evil or malicious, but then you see what their personality is like and they're just funny little fellows

Feel free to add your own examples!

[eli-ascends]

If anyone belongs on this list, it’s Skullduggery Pleasant!!

[dorkshadows]

“Meet the Reaper” AKA Top 10 photos taken before disaster

Spoiler alert: Grim did not win the game.