Bipolar Diaries by Lizzy Rowe

Entries of everyday life living with Bipolar Disorder

[elirowe]

This morning I 👀 this little bitch! ⚪️😱and I know when she starting sprouting her ugly root! Two weeks ago between my Husbands DUI and my little brother- whom I just reconnected with in July after being estranged for 10 years, calls me Sunday a.m telling me he’s going through withdrawals from a type of medicine he gets an injection for monthly to treat alcoholism; and he asks me to stay with him at his house to make sure he’s not alone if he passes out 😣😦. In addition I am still in aggressive physical therapy for my finger/hand…. and all the other family drama my mom fills me in on almost everyday for the past couple months! So yea it’s been a rough past couple of weeks and a rocky start into October 😮‍💨 But BOUNDARIES. When actively enforced👏🏼THEY👏🏼ARE👏🏼EFFECTIVE !! Who knew 🤷🏻‍♀️ lol. The thought of getting gray hair has never crossed my mind and now that I can physically see it growing out of my head of jet ⚫️ hair, I gotta be honest guys, I’m spiraling a little 😆😕😩😫😭. #FirstGrayHair #Spiraling #MarriageAndAlcoholism #SiblingsInRecovery #Alcoholism #MarriageNarcissismGaslighting #MentalHealthAwareness #BipolarDepression #BipolarDisorder #BipolarDiaries #Boundaries

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@sa.liine

[elirowe]

- A Few Good Men 🤔 #Irony #BipolarDiaries #Marriage #MentalHealthAwareness

[elirowe]

Thursday |May 23, 2019 |Lost

Thursday |May 23, 2019 |Lost

Thursday | May 23, 2019 |Lost I had a horrible night last night but first I’ll start with last weeks events. Last Thursday night, RJ and I planned to go watch John Wick 3 movie. After work I worked out, got dressed and while I was mid-makeup, RJ gets home and starts yelling that the movie starts in 20 minutes. That really got my blood boiling and the sense being rushed just hit me like a foul…

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[elirowe]

Perfect reminder I've been needing for the past couple weeks 💚 #Repost @powerofpositivity • • • • • • I needed this reminder today, how about you? Drop a ❤️ if it resonates. 👏🏻 save it 🔰for a reminder later. Or hit the ✈️ to spread the inspiration. ____________ Like our content? Follow us for more: ✨@powerofpositivity ✨@positiveenergy_plus ⭐️@positivekristen https://www.instagram.com/p/CMkfpdTHuY7/?igshid=aaosx8xekurk

[elirowe]

#happyinternationalwomensday 💋 https://www.instagram.com/p/CMJrsqPHbfV/?igshid=wk1ptbhqvwyw

[elirowe]

Wow, this is exactly how ive been feeling for the last few weeks. Loneliness tempts me into taking steps back from all ive worked hard on when it comes to caring for myself. I havent given in, but it sure is hard #BipolarDisorder #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #Repost @narcissist.sociopath.awarenes2 • • • • • • Boundaries “We talk a lot about how to set the boundary and maintaining the boundary...but not as much about how conflicted you can feel about something you probably know you need to do. When you’ve had a dysfunctional or enmeshed relationship with someone for a long time, you get used to the constant contact - even if that contact is hard, or abusive, or draining. There’s still a bond there and a connection. There’s phone calls, texts, chaos, and good times that come with these relationships. Setting boundaries and working on yourself can be really damn lonely. You might feel distant or alone. You might miss them. You might even miss the chaos you hated so much. If it feels like this, it doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong or that you shouldn’t have set the boundary. This is the adjustment phase. It’s the really hard part. And, it will absolutely get better.” - @sitwithwhit https://www.instagram.com/p/CMGhcMEDs-q/?igshid=hota1iclf9hq

[elirowe]

Trying to release my creativity in some sort of way. Giving myself options tonight. It will be interesting if i actually CREATE something cuz its been A MINUTE 🧠💚🍷🌚🖊📖🎨🖌 #BipolarDisorder #ManiaConfusion #latenightinspiration #writingcommunity #creativity https://www.instagram.com/p/CLRQpZMHc78/?igshid=trxfwh6ekw92

[elirowe]

#MentalHealthJourney #Repost @powerofpositivity • • • • • • I’m going to leave this right here … save it 🔰for a reminder later. *******Add the #popfam: Follow @powerofpositivity Follow @positiveenergy_plus Follow @positivekristen ******* Daily inspiration brings growth. We’re in this together!🙏🏻🤗 https://www.instagram.com/p/CKmlo26D7rs/?igshid=ss1w8jurmnfr

[elirowe]

These steps have definitely helped me these past few weeks 💚🧠🧘‍♀️ #Repost @mentalhealthamerica • • • • • • Do you feel like your mind is constantly racing? It’s like a train running through a million thoughts, thinking about the past, the future, or all the things that went wrong or could go wrong. As people struggling with anxiety or trauma, instead of staying grounded on the platform, we run and launch ourselves on the anxiety train and our minds go somewhere else. When this happens it’s hard to sleep, to stay focused, or be around others.⠀ ⠀ This exercise is designed to help you calm down and retrain your body and mind to stay grounded in the moment. The exercise can be used when you catch your mind wandering or if you notice you’re about to have an anxiety or panic attack.⠀ ⠀ You can talk through each of five senses. You don’t have to do them in order or do all five. You don’t even need to make sense. As long as your mind is talking through any of the statements above and not on anxious thoughts, you’re good. Try to find a calm rhythmic pattern. Talk through it until you feel your mind and your body calm down. Feel free to interrupt your thoughts with words of affirmation like, “I’ve got this” or “I’m going to be ok.”⠀ ⠀ It’s pretty hard to have two different thoughts in your head at one time. The goal is to fill your brain with thoughts on the here and now–and stop allowing your brain to go to the other place. The more you practice, the faster you’ll notice your body and brain responding well.⠀ ⠀ Visit the link in our bio to learn more about grounding. https://www.instagram.com/p/CKejRTqHRKL/?igshid=1022blukkt8je

[elirowe]

#Repost @shawncoss • • • • • • Intrusive Thoughts. Let the darkness speak, it's your choice whether or not to follow it's words. A wonderful traditional 11x14 commission to work on. #shawncoss #mentalhealthawareness #inktoberillness #skulls #morbidart #illustration #characterart https://www.instagram.com/p/CKegGCOnPk7/?igshid=1hy2v68ibvmof

[elirowe]

I’m OK. Not Fine, but OK.

Saying out loud a couple weeks ago to my husband “I cannot worry about anything or anyone but myself right now” has put me on a path to love myself  and i’m finally learning what that means, feels and looks like. This week has been the first time i've actually felt and feeling OK. I'm not fine, but i can honestly say, right now, i'm ok. I have my monthly appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow and i'll probably tell him i'm fine then immediately start crying. But we’re not going to do that are we? No we are not. I pray that you all have sweet dreams and start your week out with the same OK-ness or better! Goodnight bipolar angels. 

[elirowe]

Thursday | May 16, 2019 | Ramble Much

Thursday | May 16, 2019 | Ramble Much

Work was slow for the rest of the day yesterday, so I finished two Netflix shows in between the handful of requests I got today. Delores came over to my cube to vent about a team Edgar volunteered her to support. She went on saying how dumb they are and how do these people move up into high paying roles. I wonder that too sometimes. Now of course here come the intrusive thoughts about what I’ve…

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[elirowe]

My day was just made 🤣👏🥦 #wakeupdoris #broccoli #funny #music #laughfterisgoodforthesoul #Repost @lubalin_vibe_emporium • • • • • • Doris Anotha one! Remember 7 days ago when I had 400 followers? 😅💙 https://www.instagram.com/p/CKHqtmrHZ6N/?igshid=15tlxzqp4mcra

[elirowe]

Who the fuck am I kiddimg!!! #happynewyear2021 https://www.instagram.com/p/CJfseAPDE2H/?igshid=1l3tyg9a6tle7

[elirowe]