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WATCH THIS

I just went from having 0 feelings either negative or positive about Taylor Lautner and after watching this and with no other knowledge of him as a person I fully believe that he is a gift to humanity if for nothing other than this single contribution.

thatsthat24

I… I want Taylor Lautner… to be friends with me.

pleatedjeans

via

send-player

Don’t talk to me or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey or my pidgey ever again

thecommonchick

meladoodle

Imagine if your life was so great that the only thing you could get mad at is a movie with women in it.

blankslate

new acronyms

smao- suffering my ass off sol- suffering out loud rofs- rolling on the floor suffering

silentreadinghour

while you were partying i was stomping on oranges

while you were having premarital sex i was dehydrating tangerines

While You Wasted Your Days At The Gym In Pursuit Of Vanity I Was In Hospital With Scurvy

and now that the world is on fire and the kumquats are at the gate you have the audacity to come to me for help?

good-night-bandit

I’m honestly terrified of this post??

silentreadinghour

i stuck a lemon in the microwave and it fuckign exploded and i will do it again

hellogumdrop

seeing Obama make Biden a friendship bracelet makes me regret downloading snapchat a little less.

fyamericandad-blog

pleatedjeans

the-treasures-untold-deactivate

Okay so I’m watching my friend’s cats while she’s away and she left me descriptions so I could tell who’s who

They’re pretty accurate

56blogsstillcrazy

taeyeohn

borderline-sunflower-deactivate

i was on the train and 3 drunk girls saw me and said i had nice brown eyes so they sang “brown eyed girl” to me

5348674174-deactivated20150510

I threw up at a frat party and I was crying in the bathroom and a drunk girl went upstairs to get me a shirt and came back with a sweater and a kitten.

locke-fuckscottlynch78-lamora

At the last party I went to three drunk girls fishtail braided my hair by committee

kaylapocalypse-deactivated20201

a drunk girl drew an eye on the back of my hand and then patted it with satisfaction and whispered “count olaf”

wizzard890

once at a barbecue a drunk girl gave the surgical scar on my shoulder a butterfly kiss and said “you’re cured”

erincrocodile-deactivated202006

A drunk girl at a bar I was at became worried that I wasn’t getting enough nutrition and proceeded to hold peanuts to my lips and just keep saying “peanut peanut” until I would eat it. And after I allowed her to feed me a peanut she pet my hair and said “Thank you”.