Embroidered Throw Pillows

Apparently it takes a way long time to actually embroider throw pillows

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Some days the most important thing you can do is to take a really long nap and it's important to feel ok about that.

[vanessamarie1021]

krollshow on comedycentral - look like dis

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The only thing I believe with my entire face.

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You have truly reached adulthood, maybe, when a friend tells you she is pregnant and your initial response is not, "What are you going to do?"

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She held the poem between us and together we studied it as if it were the incomplete map of our escape route

Jim Shepard's "The World To Come"

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Think about your life as it is now.

Think about your life as it is now as it would be if it were a movie.

YOUR LIFE IS A MOVIE!

Now think about your boyfriend or fiancé or husband or whoever he is, if you have one.

Now think about the Baldwin Brothers.

Ask yourself the question:  could any of the Baldwin brothers play my significant other in the film of my life now?

Stephen:  the least of all Baldwins. Could this be your Baldwin?

Daniel:  Is this a Baldwin? Yes. The playful one. 

William "Billy" Baldwin:  I'll bet a lot of girls in the 90s made this mistake.  Don't you. 

Alec Baldwin:  yes, definitely, in a movie about your future, Alec Baldwin now could play your significant other as he is in like, 20 years. But even skinny Alec Baldwin isn't a time traveler.  

Don't date a Baldwin.  Make good decisions.  

[lolmythesis]

The patriarchy is keeping quilting down!

History of Art, Bryn Mawr College

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no more

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How to quit smoking forever (in 5 easy-ish steps)

STEP 1

Fall in love--not just any love, but a big, huge love.  Fall in a love that's smart and thoughtful but still makes you giddy.  Fall in the kind of love that you want to be in for the rest of your life. 

STEP 2

Think about the rest of your life and how, because you're going to be with this other, amazing person, you want the rest of your life to be absolutely as long as it possibly ever could be.  Want the rest of your life to be forever.  

STEP 3 

Go away somewhere with your person--preferably somewhere really warm or really cold, and definitely somewhere (like most places) such that smoking is not super popular (for example, anywhere in the U.S. after the year 2000).  Don't pack any cigarettes or lighters.  Think about how great it is not to have to put cigarettes and lighters in your bag or pockets.  Isn't that great?  

STEP 4

Take things out of your suitcase and, smelling the smoke that you haven't smoked in days, realize how much you must have smelled like smoke even when you thought you really didn't smell like smoke.  Love your person even more for putting up with that smell and loving you very much anyway.  Smell everything--like the warmth or the cold, your person's hair, sand or snow, coffee, bourbon, grilled everything.  

STEP 5

Spend time with your person. Breathe the air, be it warm or cold, and think about how much better breathing is when you're with your person.  Think about breathing forever. Think about how much better it is for your person to breathe the air (be it warm or cold) when you don't smell like smoke. Feel lucky to have found this patient, good person (who breathed that smoke and complained very rarely).  Decide to keep not smoking today and definitely tomorrow because it's something you can do to make your person's life better and to make your great life longer.  Make plans to live forever.  Follow through.

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Who the fuck steals a brain? Dick move.

Regarding s03 e01

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"It's really liberating to know that I've been living my life a certain way, and it turns out that's ok."

Perhaps because she had spent so much of her life trying to 'act' normal and confine to others’ expectations for romance [...]

Even if this entire article isn't pertinent to your life, but read it anyway because you can't rip off this sentence for the first line of a semi-autobiographical short story if you don't.  

[embroideredthrowpillows]

True love means never having to say, "What do you mean you ate the last piece of pizza?"

[dialecstatic]

if i could i would build you a rocket ship

please accept this short documentary i made for you instead. 

[embroideredthrowpillows]

This makes me temporarily forget how much I want that rocket ship.  

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She: Do you love me?

He: Yes, I love you.

She: Do you love me more than potatoes fried in duck fat?

He: Uhm... I love you more than tater tots.

[embroideredthrowpillows]

DIY Valentine's Pro Tip!!

Collage art is both more fun and more meaningful(!) when you cut apart old issues of Bitch and 7x7 and other magazines your boyfriend's shitty exgirlfriend left at his apartment when they broke up.

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He: I won't go so far as to say that I like watching it, but I like watching you when we watch it. There's this whole other side of you I never get to see.

Me: That's the costume drama side. And to be honest, I'm toning it down to about 20% right now. If you like this side of me, you're in for a treat.

[carolsusanjanedanvers]

[theanimalblog]

(by djkubik)

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This chick is so crazy.

[juliasegal-blog]

[theclearlydope]

Hello Good Morning Internet: I’ve attended a record amount of open bar holiday parties this year and this morning I feel all of them.

[embroideredthrowpillows]

Yesterday I met a woman who'd recently had her son's name tattooed across her foot.

It is a vine-like design with branches for up to three more children.  

I am in rural Iowa. Please come get me.