lalaland @emmerlyrose - Tumblr Blog

rakhna

Sharks live in salt water because pepper water would make them sneeze

rakhna

Sharks live in salt water because pepper water would make them sneeze

flotorshi

Literally every episode of My Cat from Hell

sinningsleepingandshitposting

Neatly summarized as: people not knowing how to properly take care of cats

impuretale

The episodes that don’t conform to this formula are also always the most interesting. These situations include:

1) I Didn’t Know My Cat Had PTSD and Has Gone Blind.

2) Your Cats Fight Because One of Them Doesn’t Know How to Speak Cat, and They’re Both Kinda Mad/Confused About It.

3) Your Cat Sprays Everywhere? Get Them Fixed. Surprise Twist: They Were Fixed But It Was a Botched Operation.

4) We’re Going to Rescue 50+ Kittens, Take Them to Vegas, and Adopt Them All To Loving Homes.

5) This is Not a Cat. This is a Dog.

invokingbees

I’ve just been informed about the Hand of St. Teresa

aka the Catholic Infinity Gauntlet

l30m730w

thanos confirmed

loismacgiver-deactivated2018061

feminine women are so so quick to be like “well stand for all women! all women’s choices matter!” until you breathe one word against the makeup industry and they IMMEDIATELY turn on you and act like you’re some outsider to womanhood who could never possibly understand the choices women make and you have a lot of nerve daring to imply that it’s possible to think critically about things. obviously you’re just looking down on women and women’s decisions because you’re clearly such a misogynist woman-hater who can’t stand to be around real women

loismacgiver-deactivated2018061

this post has reached corny liberal tumblr so i just wanna say that no the issue with the makeup industry is not the fact that corporations producing makeup are not sufficiently ~progressive~ or that women who don’t wear makeup are perceived as ~unprofessional~ on a corporate level. the issue with the makeup industry is that it is based in its entirety on encouraging female body dysmorphia and shaming women for their natural features to the point that women are afraid and ashamed on a massive scale to leave their houses without applying these companies’ products. and that’s a problem. lmao.

kotenok-deactivated20240301

dont wanna sound like a slut but I really need a hug right now

daverdad

the entire lord of the rings from the rings perspective

billywick

hand hand river dirt gollum hobbits pockets pockets finger envelope fire hand neck neck finger hobbits neck neck neck pocket finger LAVA

xenosaurus

my parents just got back from vacation and my mom befriended an octopus???? she scared off a small shark (because you don’t want them near you in the water) and realized the thing it had been circling was a little octopus, which then came over and stayed near her feet for a few minutes. I’ve never been so jealous in my entire life

xenosaurus

she didn’t even realize it was an octopus at first because it was pretending to be a starfish. i love my new octopus sibling.

xenosaurus

I’m glad you’re all so supportive of my newest family member

siccity

no one understands my love for Wednesday Adams

thebrisklad

Do you wanna hear one of the funniest fucken stories?

gandacel

Pls do tell

thebrisklad

So in my town there is this emo satanist community and at some point a really influential emo dude called Raven lived here. Like every emo in Romania knew him because he was somehow the edgiest of them all. He was also a gigantic incel, but still tried to flirt with every goth girl on sight. At some point when he was in his last year of high school, before leaving for college, he tried to hit on an 11 yo girl(gross). It made her rlly uncomfortable. What Raven didn’t know was that this girl’s cousin was the strongest dude in town-2 meters tall, super bulky, literally looked like a mountain. So the girl told her buff cousin what Raven looked like, and one time, while Buff guy was at work, he spotted Raven. Now, funny enough, Buff Guy worked at a children’s playground, and he was dressed up as a clown that day. So he just walked up to Raven, patted him on the shoulder and asked: “Have you ever been beaten up by a clown?” and Raven said, “N-no”. To which Buff Guy replied :“It’s fine. Because you will be.”

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

there is no possible way to predict the many directions this post took

sixpenceee

Adding varnish to painting makes it come to life. This is so satisfying to watch. (Source)

entertainment

Self care, fashion, and makeovers with Queer Eye’s Karamo Brown. More here.

lmaonade

you idiots always complain about skyrim like ohh the dungeons suck the story suck yadda yadda thats bc ur not supposed to DO any of that dumb shit! ur supposed to roam naked and free and sneak into houses to make soup! it’s a soup game!