rawr

Hi I'm Emmy. They/them pronouns. This is my personal tumblr filled with things I find amusing, entertaining, noteworthy, or otherwise sharable. My fitblr sideblog is @strong-like-future-me

[47witchyneurons]

When I get blood samples at work sometimes they’re still warm from being imminently inside the patient’s veins and my hands are always cold because all the labs Ive work in are in the basement and they keep it kinda cold for whatever reason (and I’m also just a chilly kid).

And I clutch the little warm tubes of blood and feel this sick person warming my hands and I think about how kind you might be and how I wish I could hold your hand and how badly, how really really badly, I want you to get better and stay warm and hold someone’s hand again.

And anyway sometimes it’s better to not think so vividly about the people I’m doing tests for. I’m a good little cog in a vast machine of people all trying to heal and cure, and my cog feels so fucking small sometimes. But I hope the blood I prepare for you helps you breathe better and laugh and wake up feeling well rested.

We’ve never met but you warmed my hands and I want you to know I love you and I’m rooting for you.

[emilythesincere]

god, this is so sweet

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[belovedgoofball]

@maikanto @endreal @the44th

[femmchantress]

I don’t care if Monday’s yuck

Tuesday, Wednesday tread through muck

Thursday maybe eat a duck

It’s Friday, Flat as Fuck

[grasslandscolorado]

We live in a system that makes money off of your misery and ambivalence. It relies on people thinking that they are inherently bad for the planet and that the world is ending so why change? Why try? --This is untrue! We belong here, on this one beautiful green earth and we have to work together to protect it. You have the power to do more than you know. You have a role to play in your ecosystem!

[geckocs]

Severance is a cool show. Because, like. What if you knew nothing. No context. No idea who you are. No history. And, of course, you are scared, but you can’t leave unless you get permission from someone— the person who put you here— someone who will never listen. Someone who makes all the decisions, who says “I’m a grown-up person and you’re not.” And you’re naive and lonely, but at least there’s other people in the same boat as you. Someone, just been there slightly longer, is trying to shield you, trying to protect you, taking responsibility and taking on punishment they “can handle and grow from.”

Like. Oh yeah. I recognize this one. Someone else dresses you. Someone else feeds you. Someone else, who's just like you, but they get everything. The little toys and the waffle party. Helly is desperate and suicidal, but she still has to go to school work. You have to do work that doesn't make sense, but you'll understand eventually. The meaningless, manufactured rivalry between departments. The rumors??? “they have larvae that eat them?” “I’m livestock grown for food” “I’m a bodybuilder who has loads of girlfriends, but you don’t know them they go to a different school?” Punishment in the form of apologizing over and over, having to use all the right words, until you are believed. Endless hallways. Scary authority figures. "Are you mad at me?" Religion being the only type of media you see, until you read some shitty book that changes your life. Confusing, sudden camping trips that are supposed to fix you. Condescension. The words "innie" and "outie" are brought up multiple times as infantilizing. Of course his innie's voice is higher pitched????

[hyperlexichypatia]

Everything you're forced to do -- and everything done to you -- is for your benefit, you're told... but not for the benefit of YOU-you. For the benefit of an alternate version of you, a version of you that you can't communicate with, a version of you that you don't even know really exists, but that everyone assures you is you and is, in fact, the version of you that matters more than and should be prioritized over YOU-you. You're not allowed to question this.

Yeah. Reminds me a lot of a kid's Hypothetical Adult Self.

Your future self will understand. Your future self will thank me. Your future self will want you to have done this. This is for your (future self's) own good.

Kid Me wasn't supposed to ask "If I'll want this when I'm older, why can't I just wait to do it until I'm older and want this?"

[hyperlexichypatia]

Wait, I can take this further.

The appeal of severance, at least as we've been shown it so far, is that subjects can have unpleasant experiences (childbirth, a tedious workday, a dental exam) already having happened, to skip directly to the "afterward" and have the unpleasant experience actually experienced by another, lesser version of yourself. Right?

Which is also how a lot of adults feel about children -- either their own retrospective child selves, or the children currently in their lives (whose lives must be structured to best serve their future adult selves). The purpose of childhood is to get unpleasant experiences over with so that the Future Adult Self (the self-that-matters) can have them already over with.

It's so telling that the boss at the door factory who interviews Dylan compares severance to circumcision -- a surgery commonly performed on infants, without medical necessity, based purely on the justification "They'll want/need it done as adults." Now, that's not necessarily true (the world is fully of happily uncircumcised adults), but even if if were, it would raise the inevitable question "Then why not wait until they want/need it as adults?" and the answer is "Because surgery is unpleasant and we assume adults don't want to go through it. The Future Adult Self (the self-that-matters) will want this surgery to already have happened, to have been experienced by the Lesser (childhood) Self."

And people even do this with learning skills! "I wish my parents had made me learn to play piano as a kid." Why can't you learn to play piano now? What's stopping you? What you mean is "I wish I were already good at piano-playing, I wish the awkward, frustrating, beginner stages of learning piano-playing had already been gotten over with by my Lesser Self who exists to get unpleasant things out of the way for Me, the Self Who Matters."

[tramontane-fire]

Reblog if you are Bad Queer Representation.

[verminfang]

Thinking about a vampire dude bro who won't drink girl blood- because he's afraid it will estroginise him soy products style- getting trapped in a mental cage when he learns vampire dude who only bites other dudes reads as gay

[greseadraws]

dungeon meshi but they end up in the back rooms, a cursed idea that was eating away at my brain

[nitewrighter]

Peer-reviewing @monikoishi's tags because they're banger.

[important-animal-images]

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Two animals who appreciate the Warm Lamp

[mikkeneko]

[subaru-copilot]

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

[egberts]

i got that dog in me but it's poorly socialized and i don't take it on as many walks as i should

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

Was talking to a coworker today who explained that her grandfather was like Snow White “but Californian. And an old man.” in that the creatures of the forest would follow him around and presumably duet with him.

“When he died the ravens sat in the trees outside for a week, watching. Taking turns. A horde of raccoons tried to break into the house every night, tearing at the siding. Eventually they gave up, but it was unsettling.”

“Aww. They were checking on him!” I said, like a normal person. Internally, I thought “Maybe you could do the thing you do with dead pets, where you show them to the living pets so the living pet understands they’re gone. But I guess if you did that to a bunch of scavenging species, they’d be like “Well, that’s very sad but he IS food now.” So what you’d need, for human sensibilities, is some sort of transparent corpse barrier. Like a see-through coffin oh that’s what the dwarves were doing! You’ve stopped paying attention to this conversation about the loss of a beloved family member you gotta phase back in.”

[sun-ni-day]

oh that's what the dwarves were doing

[wagitfag]

picklesbaseball

[magikonch]

[genderkoolaid]

so the context is that it was "Heated Rivalry theme night" & we also gotta talk about the Fox News article on this. expected amount of homophobia but you just gotta laugh

With families in attendance Tuesday night, the Pickles decided to honor the HBO show by creating a script where a pitcher hits a batter. The batter charged the mound, and with little kids watching, the two men embrace and start kissing. At least one little girl can be seen covering her eyes as the men kiss. Meanwhile, in Philly, sane America was celebrating with a Sandlot tribute and Ray Charles singing "America the Beautiful." The divide between sane America and the demented America that Portland wants to export across this country can't be any clearer. This isn't about two men kissing. This is about taking one of the final wholesome places left for families — the Pickles are holding a Fart Night this Friday night — and turning it into a LIB stunt factory where kids are subjected to the Alphabet Mafia's whims. [...] "Little girl in the background immediately, instinctively, and rightly, covers her eyes. Everyone knows this s–t is wrong but white liberal women keep forcing it into ever(y) facet of our lives. Fatigue," wrote a Twitter user. That was immediately countered by the typical lunatics who want to normalize this spectacle. "You mean like any little kid does when they see two people kissing..? They find all kissing gross. Gtfo here with your bigotry," the lunatic replied.

me personally i think demented america is the only america worth loving, and next the MLB should require every team engage in competitive gay sex bare ass naked on the field in front of thousands. only then will our sick liberal thirst for power be satisfied

apparently the pitcher is gay in real life tho!!! legend shit this must have been so fun for him. also he's hot as fuck. only gay men should be allowed to play baseball actually

"Guess I can check off 'making out on the diamond during a professional baseball game' from my list," the gay pitcher, who goes by J.P. Hardy, wrote to his fans on Instagram Story.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Most classic Derin character is an academic that just fucking sucks at their job.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

The difference between Andy Weir's work and mine is that Weir writes about the kinds of scientists who help change the world, and I write about the kinds of scientists who are good at convincing grant committees that they can help change the world and who wrongly believe the committees' faith in them to be accurate.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#aspirational vs familiarity

Working in science was normal for me it didn't leave me with any petty resentments or peeves

[batrachised]

We hear a great deal about the rudeness of the rising generation. I am an oldster myself and might be expected to take the oldsters' side, but in fact I have been far more impressed by the bad manners of parents to children than by those of children to parents. Who has not been the embarrassed guest at family meals where the father or mother treated their grown-up offspring with an incivility which, offered to any other young people, would simply have terminated the acquaintance? Dogmatic assertions on matters which the children understand and their elders don't, ruthless interruptions, flat contradictions, ridicule of things the young take seriously - sometimes of their religion - insulting references to their friends, all provide an easy answer to the question "Why are they always out? Why do they like every house better than their home?" Who does not prefer civility to barbarism?

-CS Lewis, The Four Loves

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

People are like “these animals have exoskeletons and these ones have endoskeletons” but no. It’s all exoskeletons, your exoskeleton is protecting your bone marrow which is where your soul (which is you) is. The rest of the stuff is extraneous decoration that Big Pharma wants you to think is important/

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Why do you think there’s so few ghosts around? Why are most ghosts people who died violently? You gotta crack the bones to let the soul out. Most souls are trapped alone in the dark and silent ground (or teaching hospitals) for hundreds or thousands of years until the bones eventually start to break. People who are cremated get their whole soul released and it can reincarnate. But if someone dies violently then maybe only a couple of their bones are cracked and a little scrap of the soul escapes but it’s incomplete and confused. Can’t figure out how to leave, gets obsessed with its own circumstances, repeats actions, CANNOT be reasoned with. PROOF that the soul is in the marrow.

See I know what I’m talking about.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Sin is stored in the teeth btw which is why young children are innocent (they’ll get a do-over with replacement teeth) and the elderly are shameless (once you have no teeth to remember your sins, you have nothing to fear).

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Upon review I think that maybe vodka isn’t for me.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#man this guy should write a book or something

Next treegrave universe book they’re all trapped on a spaceship and some dude fractures his arm and now the ship is Haunted

[ouroborosorder]

my friends and I have created a game we call Quipposting, where you play quiplash but you roll a wheel full of character archetypes, and whatever it lands on, you all answer as if you are like, a wizard or cowboy. This legitimately makes quiplash go from a fun enough game to an S+ tier absolute unabashed banger

[ouroborosorder]

the best characters are Mafia Goon, Cyberpunk Hacker, Castle Guard, Sewer Rat, 16th Century Peasant, and Alien Poorly Pretending to be Human