living with mental illness is like,, everyone is going forward.. and Iâve made⊠the smallest of progress over two damn years⊠and sometimes, Iâm even going backwards

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living with mental illness is like,, everyone is going forward.. and Iâve made⊠the smallest of progress over two damn years⊠and sometimes, Iâm even going backwards
Day 1 Keto Diet.
Lunch: Chicken salad w/ lettuce wrap.
3 net carbs.
I'm starting a keto diet tomorrow.
just assume we borderlines know. we know we fucking know okay. we know youâre hiding things from us, no matter how small it may be. we know youâre lying to us, as innocent as your intention may be. we know you think weâre being irrational. the best thing you can be with a borderline is honest. because we already know. so just say it.
Anyone else with BPD experience that moment when you feel so overwhelmed with emotion you begin to shut down physically and mentally. Your legs feel weak, your mind feels empty, and you canât even get out full sentences let alone words and you just feel completely dead.
Borderline means everything will happen again and again and again and Iâm so fucking done I just want it to stop.
Interviewer: So, can you tell me a little about yourself?
Me: *fishes phone out of pocket, looks up borderline personality disorder, and shows phone to interviewer*
I alternate between âwhy canât I be neurotypicalâ and âIâm not sick enoughâ
when someone pays any attention to me
NT emotions vs BPD emotions
*scrolls through bpd tag & reblogs 20 posts in a row bc they were relatable*
*comes across unrelatable bpd post* am i faking it
Me: It feels like the entire worldâs emotions are clustered up inside me and I feel like Iâm going to explode. Me, two seconds later: Nvm I feel nothing. Iâm an empty shell.
at this point nearly everything stresses me the fuck out.