ENIGMA OF WALDEN

Inconsistency is good when you're bad.

[enigmaofwalden]

It's never too early for a scotch....

With that being said.....that is a cup of tea on my desk...

[enigmaofwalden]

California Drought:

Nobody will care until it's too late; just like global warming...

[enigmaofwalden]

You should always care about the people you know and know the people you care about.

[enigmaofwalden]

This book will get there....And it's going to be epic...since I'm spending my spare time developing the characters and giving them an intricate backstory...i just have to actually write it...20 pages a week too much???

It really shouldn't be....Even thought I'm a math major...

[enigmaofwalden]

I'm the only person who would fixate on moral dilemmas in a scary movie.

[enigmaofwalden]

I'm tempted to try stand up again...

[enigmaofwalden]

I just watched a scary movie....

Imagine you're driving in the middle of nowhere.

Hypothetically-There are 10 people in the wilderness. 5 are killers. 5 will be victims (killers and victims are disjoint sets; all victims will be killed if there exist at least one killer who is alive)

YOU see a person in the middle of the road and you have the following options:

A) Do you stop in the middle of the road, and let that person in the car? 

-i) if he is a killer, you will be killed

-ii)if he is not a killer, then you save him. 

B) Do you run the person over? 

C) Drive around the person?

I'm aware of the moral implications, but make a decision before you continue....

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what if it was 100 people?

what if they were all children?

what if the percentage the person is a killer is 99.99%, .01%.

Should your answer change? SHOULD IT?

What does it say about the value of human life? (this question is phrased not limited to perspective)

Are you the hero or the villain? The pacifist who never lived a day, or a man who dies for his conviction? Who Are You?

[enigmaofwalden]

I don't know if I'm stronger than I was a year ago....

But I think I am...AND THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS

[enigmaofwalden]

This is how I felt this morning....

This is morning That's when I spend the most time Thinking 'bout what I've given up This is a warning When you start the day just to close the curtains You're thinking 'bout what I've given up Where are you now? As I'm swimming through the stereo I'm writing you a symphony of sound Where are you now?

-Jack Mannequin, The Mixed Tape

Well not exactly, but it can't be a coincidence can it?

The feeling of searching for something, the feeling of wanting to find something every morning, and then as the cherry on top, romanticize it. I want that.

[enigmaofwalden]

Yesterday, I was powerless; literally, there was a power outage.

And for what seemed like an eternity, I watched as the darkness serenely eclipsed the light, and all I did was stand and stare. 

Don't get me wrong, I was on the phone a lot until my cell phone battery died...

But when all the noise disappears, you tend to notice how scary silence really is.

I turned off my flashlight, for in my mind, I was not scared of the darkness, the quiet.

But I think I was...

For when I rose to stand in the darkness, I was alone, and as I stepped afar from what I already recognized as safety, I was more alone.

And in the quiet, I was the noise and the distraction that nobody heard.

And I realized my fear: I was powerless, and I was unnoticed, and in doing so, I only existed in my own mind and in nobody else. Sooner or later, the darkness and the quiet will overwhelm me; Dylan Thomas wrote 'Do not go gentle into that good night' 

But now it is night, and all I can do is hope for the light. The sun will rise, but there is nothing I can do to make it so. 

so powerless...

[enigmaofwalden]

Some quotes in songs just resonate better than others, and sometimes, for that one moment, I feel like whoever wrote the song is empathizing with you, understands you.  

"It’s ten to midnight and this cheap champagne is wearing off, she’s tearing off her dress

God I’m such a mess And in the dark she’s taking shots at my heart  She’s got it to an art and this how I fall apart "

~I think this is Tyler Hilton...

[enigmaofwalden]

When you hear 'genuinely'

(you're genuinely a nice guy), there WILL be a BUT after it...

OR

(I genuinely believe...), you DON'T actually mean what you say....

[enigmaofwalden]

I hate complications

....

and I know that it's my fault

I wasn't prepared....not enough...

Not yet..

[enigmaofwalden]

YAAAAA I haven't been on in a while....

Then again...I told you inconsistency is good if you're bad

--AND then then the parallels:

-inconsistency is bad if you're good

-consistency is good if you're good

-consistency is bad if you're bad

[enigmaofwalden]

I was told life is a game, but there are those who dont want to win. So why do you keep playing?

[enigmaofwalden]

I want to say I know the difference between living and being alive, but I think I'm just too committed to an faulty assumption.

[enigmaofwalden]

I'm on the wrong side of the positive feedback loop in the job finding paradox...