there was a teacher who teaches at the school i was taking specialized classes at when covid happened on the team we just played and one of the fuckass 17 year olds on my team HAD HIM AS A TEACHER AND THEY WERE CHATTING and when i tell you my vision went white with rage for a second-
i have a huge weakness for corvid-inspired characters. if the character reminds me of blue jays, crows, ravens, jackdaws, magpies, or is directly inspired by them, they're immediately added to my maladaptive daydreams yes indeed! 🙂↕️
i do remember this piece giving me some trouble though. i went back and forth on whether to render this or not, to transform the sketch/illustration into a painting or not. eventually i decided i didn't need to, but not before i did a lot of erasing and redrawing, and definitely not before i got frustrated and had to walk away from my tablet to get some chocolate and peanut butter. it took me awhile to pick it back up again.
making art does not come without its frustrations. when i start to feel stiff, exhausted, and annoyed with myself, it's usually because i didn't catch onto some other sign of hunger, thirst, need for movement, or another similar need. i have a hard time knowing when to take a break. i get so absorbed in the work. but i am proud of myself for remembering taking a step back and taking a break more often. it really helps.
i'm getting better at recognizing that point where the excitement of creation catches up to me, where i know that the satisfaction of making something i am proud of is within my reach. where i make an important choice: a) continue working on the piece or b) take a break.
the second choice is just about taking a break, not finishing it, since i can always pick up the art piece to continue it another time. this art piece will be here, waiting for me, if i decide i want to render and paint vax in all his glory. but until that moment comes, i'm ok with leaving it as is.
sometimes i work on a piece for so long that i overdo it, and the magic of it all that pushed me to create in the first place starts to fade. the satisfied, wonderful feeling that i know is right before me begins to feel further and further away. that magic usually starts to fade when i stop enjoying the creation process, and start to worry about whether or not the end result looks exactly how i envisioned it to. the magic thrives when i take breaks and step back from the piece. the magic thrives when i am present in my body as well as my creative mind, they work together. bodymind. the magic thrives when i let my hand move the way it wants to move, to draw the lines that feel natural and fun and interesting in their movements.
and so the art is finished (for now). i don't have to choose between continuing to work and then "finishing it," where i never return to the piece. the art can be finished and then continued later. it doesn't need to have such finality to it. it can transform and change with me.
started on July 8, 2025
created with Procreate software on iPad Pro (12.9 inch) (4th gen)
draw time 4 hrs 28 mins
When a small mammal scrunches up and cleans its face and whiskers with its little hands very rapidly. I just wanted to give you that thought for a moment did u like it.
in a world where happy rich people sell the discontent lower class the lie that money cant buy you happiness it is at least reassuring to know that our sole trillionaire is the most pathetic, unloved, miserable, alone human being on the planet, and that NOTHING could make him happy. get fuckeddd lol
Experimented a bit with a new way of detailing the tiles. Kinda like it? This particular piece took a hell of a lot of work. I’d love if you shared the vibes it’s giving off, for research purposes 💖
I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with relating to characters, “they’re literally me” etc but if that’s the only way you engage with stories you’re kinda missing the whole point of Characters being vehicles through which we can see perspectives outside of our own. and also you’re going to get upset when the Character acts in a way that is not Personally Relatable to You
gummygunk
dailybridgerton
ellievsbear
baratheonpilled
germansingergirl
yousharknotpass
