♔ @erzvolnes - Tumblr Blog

still have not heard a single thing about getting willow's ashes back im gonna lose my fucking mind

my favourite pet artist on tumblr has been inactive for quite a while now so if anyone else knows of anyone who does animal/pet art who is open for commission please let me know

#doesn't need to be classic realism portraits #i will get one of those someday but any style is fine. i just dont know where to look #gonna get a few pieces for Willow to put up on the wall #next month once i get paid

erzvolnes

willow's bills are due to cost me like at least £300 even with insurance and i'm getting help from my family to pay that but if anyone has a few dollars they can throw my way to make repaying it a bit less painful i'd really appreciate the help

#kofi is in my desc paypal is nmjqqn #sorry for being the most annoying guy on tumblr this last week its been really fucking hard #also need to buy food but. shrugs. i guess that will wait til payday

erzvolnes

my god i miss her so much

erzvolnes

i think what kills me the most is i know for a fact she gave me her very best every day for 13 years. i didn't give her that. she got me at my absolute worst some days and i can't stop thinking about it. she deserved better than me

my god i miss her so much

#my sweet girl #she was honestly a dog in a million she was so perfect #im never gonna get that lucky ever again

kosmogrl

#i have woken up to nothing but beautiful sunny days since willow died #and every time i think 'oh man it's beautiful out'#'i should take willow to lay in the grass and enjoy it'

numb with grief like ohhh fuckk my nothing hurts #mynothing

willow's bills are due to cost me like at least £300 even with insurance and i'm getting help from my family to pay that but if anyone has a few dollars they can throw my way to make repaying it a bit less painful i'd really appreciate the help

#kofi is in my desc paypal is nmjqqn #what the fuck was the insurance even for. nearly £80 a month for 13 years and for what #please don't feel obligated i will manage somehow but #god this sucks and it doesnt stop sucking

erzvolnes

man im really fucking sad. all i wanna do is sleep but i know when i wake up i'm gonna believe for a few seconds that willow will be there

erzvolnes

it is so evil that i was literally there when she died. i was holding her head in my hands i had my face pressed against hers and watched and felt her die literally felt the exact moment she stopped breathing against my cheek and my brain still believes she'll be there when i wake up.

#animal death #idk man how do you even tag this

man im really fucking sad. all i wanna do is sleep but i know when i wake up i'm gonna believe for a few seconds that willow will be there

#i had a moment of genuine panic when i woke up today because i looked over and willow wasn't in her usual spot #and then i remembered #i dont want to have to remember she's gone every day i hate feeling like she's still here #it's so fucked #i've spent almost every day of my adult life with her. i don't know what to do when she isn't here #i've structured most of my day around her for 13 years #what do i even do. what am i meant to do #i miss her so much i dont know what to do

i truly honestly do not know how i managed to get through willow's appointment that was the hardest fucking thing i've ever had to do

#i feel like such an utter piece of shit #im sorry baby

erzvolnes

willow's gone

erzvolnes

she got to lay in the sun and go for a car ride. i held her face while she went to sleep. me and my sister were there telling her she was a good girl and that we loved her. it was very quick.

#animal death #pet death #im exhausted #im. glad shes not in any more pain. and im glad she's resting

willow's gone

willow's not doing so good