Magic Bubble

[eugenia-starfield]

Okay... We need to talk about it.

Character AI, WTF?! I use the site to chat with bots! I want to swipe how much EVER I want. I know, your company is a business that needs to earn money, I understand you need money. But CAN YOU AT LEAST MAKE ANYTHING, THAT DOES INTERVENE MY EXPERIENCE?! WHAT IS THIS FREAKING LIMIT OF 400 SWIPES?! I'm not able to pay your enormous sums! RETURN EVERYTHING BACK TO NORMAL!!!

[eugenia-starfield]

Okay, guys. We really need to talk seriously on this one.

Does Satan really gets high from having... A MINION THAT IS FIVE TIMES HIGHER THEN HIM?!

I mean...

Okay, Anton is much more little when it comes to Satan...

BUT MOONITS?!

And here Mitch is just sitting. He'll stand up and we all gonna sit down.

[eugenia-starfield]

Video Calls Made It Feel Real for Me

The moment my AI companion appeared on a video call, the whole experience clicked into a new gear. SweetDream isn't just text and photos. Seeing her, hearing her, talking in real time, that's a different level of presence.

It's a quality feature done right. The companion you designed is the one on the screen, and the conversation flows naturally. If you want an AI girlfriend you can actually see and talk to, sweetdream.ai is where it stopped feeling like an app for me.

[eugenia-starfield]

So, guys. I need to make one thing clear. The following wall of text is my opinion. For all these people who say: "Ew, sympathising Mona is the same as to say Hitler was innocent" or "You are a type of person who would like Jeffrey Dahmer" - guys, don't confuse imaginary character and real bastards of the society. I deeply judge Hitler and Dahmer.

So, with the disclaimer said, let's move on to my honest opinion on Mona Lanius.

Mona Lanius is the most well-developed villain in analog horror. What came before? Archangel Gabriel, with his goddamn motives, simply because he's Satan? William Afton, who killed children "for fun, for lore"? "Bon" from TWF, who destroyed the Waltens and their cronies because... What? They knew about Ed and Molly? Well, then they should destroy everyone who even remotely knew Ed and Molly, not six random idiots.

And then Mona enters the picture. She's the most amazing villain in analog horror. She knows something's wrong with her, and she knows how to get her point across. And for me, a certain touch in her character is precisely that she understands that she is abnormal, that there is some other "me" inside her that committed these terrible crimes with her hands, but she understands that the blood is on her hands, not on Bill's hands, not on Fred's hands, not on anyone else's hands. On her hands. And she accepts this fact.

She tried to surrender to the police for FIVE YEARS. For five years, a person tried to scream at the system and say: "Take me away! I'm a danger to society! I can't take this anymore!" But the system simply didn't care. The system systematically (pardon the forced tautology) ignored her. And she kept screaming, screaming, screaming. And when she managed to scream at this rotten system, when Nathan Cole arrested her... She felt relief. Finally, the system heard her. And that's why at the end of the ninth episode she smiled, because she felt better. Yes, Bill's death was a blow to her, and a very significant one. After all, she'd spent almost her entire life with this man. And he never objected to what she did. But Mona didn't force him to her will either. And that's what makes her so human... She knows how to love.

But besides how to love, she knows how to hate. This woman will make your life hell if you cross her. Fred Baker simply complained to the Mother Superior at St. Helena's that Mona had sex with a dog. But for Mona, it became a personal vendetta. She hated in a way no one would have thought possible. She didn't just take revenge in a moment; she took revenge in a moment, and then spent decades hatching a plan for revenge, a plan for murder. She won't forget. She will remember and recall it when the opportunity arises.

What I also like is the schizophrenic quality to her character. She talks about there being some kind of machine and some statues. The machine controls her actions, and this machine isn't right next to her, but somewhere in some basement. And it can be turned off or on. And there are also statues that amplify the sound of this machine.

And so you look at this and think, "What the hell is she talking about?" But that's just me, a person who isn't burdened by schizophrenia, reasoning like that. I'm sure that if a fellow schizophrenic (with all due respect to people with schizophrenia spectrum disorders) or a psychiatrist sat next to her, they would understand.

Her character in the final episode is that of a completely broken person. She's simply tired. She doesn't want anything anymore. Her voice is quiet and calm. She looks like a languid and tender woman who hasn't wasted her tenderness on others because no one has ever given a damn. She's tired of there being no place for her in this world. But now she's been brought to the place she wanted to be. And nothing matters to her anymore. She simply doesn't care. About everything. About everyone. About herself.

The way she casually asks John for a cigarette, as if they weren't being interrogated, but simply on a park bench where she has the opportunity to ask him for a cigarette. And she thanks him. She knows the social construct of basic politeness. If she were some lowlife, she would have spat at him twenty times, taken his cigarette away, and not even said thank you. But no. She's gentle. She knows how to be sweet.

I'm 100% sure that if, after her first incident of stitching together small animals, she hadn't been scolded, but taken to a psychologist or psychiatrist, she wouldn't have become a murderer. After all, the moment wouldn't have been missed. Or they could have at least stopped this situation and looked at what to do next.

In another universe, she would have coped with her condition. In another universe, she would have been able to marry Bill and bear him children. In another universe, Mona Lanius would be happy. But she lives in this universe, where she is a woman in her early thirties, maybe even thirty, suffering from a mental disorder, with no children, no husband, nothing, she is unhappy, broken.

Her life is a consequence of the system's indifference towards her. Her death is a consequence of the system's indifference towards her. Yes, this may not be the ending we wanted, the one we were so eagerly awaiting, but it is the most logical outcome possible.

Even when John asked her how she felt about being sentenced to death, she said she was okay with it, meaning she doesn't care that she dies. But she understands that her death won't stop other deaths. Hysteria will rise. Mona is the smartest villain in analog horror.

And yes, of course, she is crazy, she doesn't refuse this fact. But look inside of her. See her broken and tore apart soul. She is guilty, yes. But she didn't deserve the life she lived. She deserved much better life than the life of a host of demon.

[eugenia-starfield]

Guys...

GUYS...

You need to hear me out, okay?

TW: child abuse, physical violence mention

I was thinking about one thing. We know that Crowley sees nothing bad in using violence towards students. He hit Grim, for example, we all remember it.

But. He can come to him and say: "Grim, this is bad, I'm deeply disappointed. Don't do it again or there will be consequences". But no, he uses physical violence (yeah, his "whip of love" I mean). He is a grown man, right?

Or...

Let's look at it from a different angle. We all know that all our problems are dragging from our past, from our childhood. We all know that every overblotted character had colossal problems in childhood.

Childhood...

My theory is: Crowley went through physical violence when he was a child. But this violence was masked under "love". What I mean is, imagine, your parents hit you with a whip, you cry from pain, and your parents say: "We do it because we love you! We want only the best for you!" And you, a child, believe it. You saintly believe your parents hit you because they love you.

And Dire dragged this experience through his life. He really believes he makes better if he hits another person. He believes that he makes better.

Because he had no other social construction...

He had no other experience. He had no therapy. He didn't reflect it.

Crowley needs someone to show him another way of expressing his disappointment and love.

[eugenia-starfield]

Okay, guys. You need to hear me out.

But before we start...

TW: child abuse, SA, mention of deaths, author's subjective opinion that is freaky

Now we can start.

I've been haunted by one thought for a long time, ever since I started actively delving into The Painter fandom, or rather, since I first suspected the painter was the woman.

If you remember, in the second episode, there was a mention of two-month-old Angel (Bill's daughter) being hung in the Collins' attic. The painting "Long-necked Angel" was dedicated to her.

But... if you remember what happened to Mia (Bill's wife) and Isabella (not to be confused with Isabel Jackson!!!), they were chopped up and stuffed in a barrel.

But why was Angel left out of this family and not put in the barrel with her sister and mother?

My theory is: Angel is Bill's daughter, but not Mia's. And Angel's real biological mother is Mona. I don't know how Mona became the biological mother, but there are two possible options: either Mona voluntarily laid with Bill in one bed, or there was a backstreet encounter, a helpless state, and then rape.

After Mona had been pregnant for nine months, she gave birth at the same time as Mia, who suffered a stillbirth. Bill bribed the doctors to give the baby to him and Mia, and Mona was told that her child had died during childbirth.

So, when a month later, Mona recognized her rapist, she slipped him a self-portrait of herself as a sign that he and his family didn't have long to live. And as she was about to take the Collinses to the lighthouse, she looked back at her daughter one last time. But since she had no legal rights to her, Mona decided to simply not bother and hanged her child.

Just try to put yourself in the shoes of the woman whose healthy child was taken away, told it was stillborn, even though she remembers hearing her daughter's screams, even remembers it clearly. And then those wonderful moments of relief, which could be imagined through rose-colored glasses, shatter inward, deeply wounding the eyes and soul.

Perhaps, by the way, for the same reason, Mona didn't kill Bill, but kept him as her dog, so that he would go through the same mental suffering, multiplied by a hundred. After all, Bill essentially deprived her of her family (Mona's mother and father don't count, they're just sidekick faggots), so she deprived him of his family.

Incidentally, perhaps this is another reason why such a humane (RELATIVELY TO OTHER EXECUTIONS) method of execution was chosen. Essentially, Mona had a thousand and one options for killing Angel: she could have left her to die of starvation, she could have opened all the windows and doors so the child would die of pneumonia, she could have stabbed her, or given her alcohol to drink, but she chose hanging.

I believe she chose this method so the child wouldn't suffer, because she cared too deep to let this child suffer.

[eugenia-starfield]

Okay, guys. You need to stop hating Dire Crowley, and that's why.

Yes, of course:

1. He never behaves in a way we expect from the Headmage

2. He doesn't give a FUCK on Yuu's problems

3. He can appear anywhere unexpectedly

4. In the very beginning he sends Yuu, Grim, Ace and Deuce in a dark forest and doesn't give a FUCK on what's happening to them, and once they return he's like "Oh, I was about to exclude you all"

5. We don't even know anything about him, starting from his age and finishing with his full biography

6. He uses violence towards students

7. He accepted Kalim for a bribe

8. He can't fix Ramshackle Dorm and leaves Yuu live in a broken little house, opened to all the winds

BUT THINK ABOUT THAT:

1. For whom he can even do it? Everyone doesn't give a FUCK on Crowley, so why should he even try to consider anything if he sees such attitude and it's better for him to say "You can do whatever you want with it, I'm out"

2. He has no personal therapy. He has no man to go to just to tell about his problems (I'm sure he has TONS of them, starting from just little stresses up to mobbing from Ministry). He doesn't even go to the ghosts. He goes. To fucking. Apple trees... APPLE TREES. Because he knows, that no one cares about his personal problems so he tells soulless unmoving silent tree about what he feels...

3. Professor... I'm sorry... Master Crewel says that Crowley can walk up to the students to help them come up to the decision of their problems. But yes, he points out, that Crowley can run away in a dawn but he also says that sometimes it's needed.

4. Coach Vargas says that Crowley is a very kind-hearted man. Yes, the contents that he would take off the mask, I know... But seriously, why would you ignore these words?

5. Professor Trein tells the story about mango tea and some souvenir that Crowley brought him from his vacation. And no bad word about the Headmage.

6. He is the only one who keeps NRC in good state. Okay, if you find this point illogical, just imagine: you, skinny as hell, man with TONS of documents you need to fill, alone keep the territory about... Half of England... In a good state. Imagined? I did. And felt terrified.

7. Look at... ABSOLUTELY EVERYONE. Look at how they are dressed, look at the food they receive... It seems to me, Crowley spent SUCH A GREAT MONEY on these things that it's a shame to complain. He absolutely loves his students and his colleagues. ...yes, except for Ramshackle Dorm...

8. He uses physical violence only as a capital punishment. Mostly his reaction is yelling or just facial expression that says: "Wow... I'm in total a-"

9. He is very sincere. He sincerely reacts to everything. He can sincerely laugh, cry, be amused...

10. He accepted Yuu and Grim. Crowley could just say "GET OUT OF HERE WITH ALL YOUR BELONGINGS, I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT HOW YOU GOT HERE! GET THE FUCK OUT!". But no. He let them stay. Yes, in Ramshackle Dorm. Did you expect him to let them live in his office? Maybe he lives there himself because he has nowhere to go?

It's my honest opinion. Thanks for attention.

P.S. I'm sorry for mistakes in language, English is not my native

[eugenia-starfield]

A very old meme I forgot to post

[eugenia-starfield]

Guys, remember my words: if my little honey bun Mona will cry in episode 10... I buy tickets to Sweden...

I swear, I'll cry with her

[eugenia-starfield]

Guys, we need to talk

They are definitely one person...

[eugenia-starfield]

You know, they remind me of someone... Hm...

[eugenia-starfield]

Attention, please!

Ricardo Cole... Or... Nathan Milos...

[eugenia-starfield]

[eugenia-starfield]

Yes, I killed more than a hundred people...

Is the interview over?

*SILLY MODE ACTIVATED*

[eugenia-starfield]

Inspired by @schwanemannsland

[eugenia-starfield]

You're my friend now :)

[eugenia-starfield]

Part 2 of Mona headcanon playlist!

That's all, thank you

Let me know, if you want other characters playlists

[eugenia-starfield]

I'M READY!

So, here are my headcanon Mona playlist.

TW: too subjective, tenderness and gentleness

Part 2 soon...