Synopsis: All your life you’d listened to your friend, Usopp spin wild tales about pirates and adventure. Pirates weren’t a thing that came often to Syrup Village, but one straw hat pirate and his crew changed all that the day they arrived. Now, you aren’t so sure if your sleepy little village was always pirate-free or if no one had been paying attention.
Synopsis: After the defeat of Arlong, at Arlong Park, the five of you promised to yourselves, and each other, to achieve your dreams on your way to the Grand Line helping Luffy search for the One Piece. It seems simple enough, except for the minor detail that you died. Coming back from the brink of death, Zoro and the others have noticed you haven’t been the same. You aren’t sure if it’s Death himself chasing after you or something far more sinister. But facing your inner demons won’t be the only fight you’ll have to worry about when family comes calling.
Hey! hope you’re doing okay, haven’t seen ur posts in a while <3
Hi babes 🖤
I’ve been absent mostly because, at the time, about two weeks ago I found my mom unresponsive in her bed. Come to find out, she suffered a large aneurysm that ruptured in her brain and caused extensive bleeding.
I took my mom off life support on the 14th.
I’m sorry I’ve been quiet or if I’ve worried anyone in any fashion who’s friends with me here. Ya girl just been grieving.
I hope all of you are doing well and your weeks have been kind to you. Love you all bunches.
Hi, so I went to update my master list with the latest chapter for CITB I posted, AND TUMBLR MOTHERFUCKIN DELETED THE FIRST PROLOGUE PART OF WANTED. JUST SWALLOWED IT.
HI. HELLO. I'M FUCKING SEETHING. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, TUMBLR????
Synopsis: All your life you’d listened to your friend, Usopp spin wild tales about pirates and adventure. Pirates weren’t a thing that came often to Syrup Village, but one straw hat pirate and his crew changed all that the day they arrived. Now, you aren’t so sure if your sleepy little village was always pirate-free or if no one had been paying attention.
Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader
Genre: friends to lovers, frenemies to lovers, slow burn (I hope y’all like aching) eventual smut
Words: 15.7+
A/N: This chapter got waaaaaay ahead of me. It got longer and longer without me realizing it. So, I apologize for the length in advance and if this isn't any good. In the anime, Nami has some wild outfits and I wanted to sort of bring that to this adaptation a little. Nothing too crazy, but still Nami anime-esque. Also, don’t shoot me but I had a little creative liberty with something in here it’s not canon so yeaaaaaa…please just indulge me for the story lol. Also, this has another Zoro POV, and from here on out things will be very angsty, because I am the proclaimed mayor of Angstville, courtesy of @chans-room and it is my duty to bring a little to the next few chapters. As always, thank you, guys, for all the love and support. For always being so kind and loving it as much as you do. I hope you all continue to enjoy this story🖤 Much Love, Jenn
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Previous Next
“Hey Nami?”
You hoped the widespread dread you were beginning to feel wasn’t that apparent in your tone as you spoke. You did one last check in the mirror before turning to her reply of, “Hmmm?”
“Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but-“
“But?”
God, she looked amused.
“Is this supposed to be so…short?”
There was no denying Nami liked clothes. Gold. Berry. Okay, so Nami likes shiny things and things that could also buy her the shiny things. She also seemed to have a flair for fashion. Unfortunately, that fashion was intended to be worn on someone with a bit more confidence than you had. For once, you’d wished you’d paid attention to other things outside of just the components of what made up a plant.
“You don’t like what I picked.”
“It’s not that I don’t like it,” you stuttered out. “But this skirt is definitely…short.”
In one smooth move, Nami uncrossed her legs and got up from her seat. When she reached you, her hands grabbed your shoulders and gently turned you back to the mirror. Your reflections showed one woman questioning her whole existence because of a skirt with a corset style top, and one who looked confident in everything she did.
This time you were definitely not the latter.
“You look hot.”
“I look ridiculous and I’m afraid to bend over.”
Nami rolled her eyes so hard for a split second all that you saw was white. The hands that were on your shoulders now forcing you to turn from your reflected look of terror to her. Nami’s eyes shown bright with a determination to make you confident in walking out of her room and heading into the restaurant.
“Doc, do we need to do an affirmation together.”
“Absolutely not.”
“Then I need you to shake off whatever thoughts you’re having and realize that you are hot. Be confident in your own body.”
To send her words home, Nami clapped her hands against your shoulders and gave them one last shake before releasing you. You weren’t sure what to do or say after that so you just stood…staring back at her.
“Are you going to blink?”
“Sorry,” you hummed, shaking your head. “I was still trying to understand why you get a whole shirt and I get this.”
While her pink and tan outfit was tight and showed a good amount, her small eyelet cut out on her shirt barely showed, if any, cleavage. You felt like a bakery with the amount of buns you were selling.
There was that eye roll again.
“Oh my god,” she muttered under her breath. “You are impossible.”
Nami appeared to be tired of trying and turned on her heel to go over to a drawer. You weren’t sure what she was doing - or grabbing - but instead of watching her, you found your eyes drifting back to the mirror. You didn’t look bad just…different. You weren’t used to looking hot, as Nami put it but also so exposed. You reached over and grabbed your satchel and placed it over your shoulder, using it like a security blanket. All it did was make you feel more exposed than before, like a fraud wearing your face but dressed as someone more confident than you’d felt.
The sound of a drawer shutting hard brought you out of your thoughts and back into the present. It didn’t keep your hands from wringing the strap on your satchel.
Fuck it
“Hey, Nami do you think-“
“Zoro is going to like it? Yeah. I think he won’t be able to keep his eyes off you.”
You felt like the air had been stripped from your lungs. Your eyes no doubt were large and showing your surprise as you struggled to make words formulate on your tongue.
“Okay, that wasn’t what I was going to ask.”
“It wasn’t?” She teased.
“You know damn well I was going to ask something else.”
Why does she look so smug?
No. You were not frowning.
“Okay, then tell me: what were you going to ask?”
“I suddenly can no longer recall.”
Nami’s smile was joined seconds later with laughter that followed behind you as you tried to make your escape. The sound of very happy feet following closely behind at your heels. You were tempted to look back just to see if she was skipping, but her next teasing words sent you up the stairs two at a time.
“Sure you don’t.”
“You can’t prove it,” you shot back just as you cleared the stairs.
The sun was a welcome warmth on your skin after days of being covered in the mist of the fog. The sounds of happy banter between Usopp and Luffy sent you walking towards the main belly of the ship. You could see Usopp dressed in a pirate hat, a leather jacket sans the shirt, and matching pants. A pair of circle sunglasses adorned his face and you had to admit he looked pretty cool. Luffy just made you want to reach over and gently pinch his cheeks.
How is anyone supposed to take him seriously…
He was wearing overalls, for Christ sakes. Luffy looked absolutely adorable.
At the sound of your approach the guys turned towards you and the reaction you received made you want to throttle Nami. Luffy’s smile faltered ever slightly and Usopp wouldn’t even look you in the eye.
“Hey Doc, you look-ugh different.”
“Gee, thanks Usopp,” you grumbled.
“Are you guys done playing dress up so we can get a drink?”
Of course he was more interested in a drink than food. Of course, Zoro sounded like his usual grumpy self, as well. The problem? He didn’t look like his usual grumpy self.
While Zoro had been wearing t-shirts and jeans - things that looked comfy and regular the past few days - it was replaced with something dangerous. The hue of his kimono style shirt was a blue so deep it could’ve come from the ocean itself.
The most dangerous part about the shirt wasn’t just that it left a devilish window of skin on his chest available to torment your eyes. It was that same v-shaped window indicated the indent of a sculpted chest and collarbones, but the fabric at his arms hugged the muscles tight. The same strong arms you’d watch do repeated reps with weights and push-ups. Muscles that moved with ease under the skin as he skillfully practiced with his swords.
The dangerous part, after all of this, was that it mimicked a gi. The fabric folded over each other telling you that it would only take a slight tug from your hand to release the tucked material from his pants, from the safety of his sashed belt to leave his chest exposed to your hands and-
God, focus on something else.
But you couldn’t focus on anything else. How could you with the way he was looking at you?
Zoro’s eyes scanned over your body and every inch his gaze lingered caused your skin to flush. You fought the urge to fidget with the strap of your satchel but couldn’t stop your teeth from pulling in your bottom lip. Zoro’s eyes caught the movement and honed in on it. Your breath hitched in your throat and you could’ve sworn Zoro noticed that too.
You were supposed to dislike him. He was an asshole. A drunk. A pain in the ass with a smart mouth. God, it didn’t stop you from wanting him so bad your body ached. From the way he was watching you, you could’ve sworn maybe it felt the same for him. It was a nice thought until he opened his mouth.
“You’re going to wear that?”
And just like that, whatever witchcraft was in the air to make you think of doing anything other than annoying the shit out of him was gone.
“I think she looks good.”
Nami came to stand beside you and tore Zoro’s eyes from you to her.
“Yeah she does,” Usopp agreed from behind you, “but Naan would have a fit if she saw you dressed like this.”
A groan exhaled from your lips as you turned and started for the ramp. No, you were not stomping your feet. You just needed to get off this damn boat and away from all the idiot men aboard.
“Good thing Naan isn’t here, then,” you huffed.
You could practically feel Usopp shrug his shoulders, his hands up in question as he yelled after you, “I was just being honest. Naan would tell her it wasn’t practical.”
You weren’t sure who he said the last part too and you didn’t care. You were already stepping over the side of the Merry and heading towards the ramp when you felt a presence behind you. You expected it to be Nami and what you got was the shock of seeing Moss colored hair and the glint of three gold earrings.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m walking. What does it look like?”
But why must you do it next to me?
The question hung on the back of your tongue. You weren’t brave enough to ask it, because you could already hear the question of, “Why?”. Why did it matter if Zoro chose to walk beside, in front, or behind you? It shouldn’t matter what he chose to do, but it did matter because the way he looked at you just now was forever burned into your frontal lobe.
“Just this once you couldn’t just leave the swords on the ship?”
“Wherever I go the Wado Ichimonji goes.”
Of course it does
You expected him to do his usual of falling back to stand with Luffy. It’s what he usually did. Today was apparently shaping up to be an unusual one. Not only did he not stop walking with you, he continued to follow close behind you as you entered into the Baratie. His presence was hard to miss since when you stopped inside the foray of the restaurant Zoro was mere inches from your back.
“Must you stand so damn close to me?”
Each word was uttered through clenched teeth. You didn’t want to turn around and look at him. You didn’t need eyes in the back of your head to know if you did you would come fast first to the exposed skin of his chest.
“Why’d you bring your satchel in here? Are you worried someone is going to stub their toe?”
“Can you for two seconds-“
The words had come out as a growl. Your skin bristled with a heated irritation to rip into him, and tell him that he was being his infamous asshole self. Cool points went to you for not completely falling apart when you caught sight of him.
Zoro was too damn close looking how he looked with his chest exposed like that. His hands in their rightful place of one in his pocket and the other resting casually on his sword. The darkness of his eyes appeared so endless you were certain the moon could call them home. Maybe she already had and that’s why they sparked to life every time he looked at you.
Just like now.
One minute, Zoro’s face held its usual emotionless stare and the next you watched as his eyes lit up like fireworks in the night sky; celebrating an event you once again missed. A soft tug on the corner of his lip lifted just enough you could’ve called it a smirk.
When did he start looking at you like this?
That wasn’t even the biggest question. The biggest question was, when did you start to fall for it?
You felt your tongue involuntarily flick out to wet your suddenly dry lips, and to your horror Zoro’s eyes lazily watched the movement. He didn’t even try to hide it.
Oh god, you should’ve stayed on the boat.
You watched Nami come through the double doors entrance and the way her face lit up as her eyes roamed between the both of you instantly sent your eyes rolling. You were never going to hear the end of this. You let out a deep breath, your eyes scanning one last time in his direction, before you walked over to join Nami.
The Baratie was a thing of beauty. You’d never seen a building like it. While the outside was made of boards of broken down ships in the style of an actual fish, red siding and white ashwood for those fishy lips, the inside was a well thought out piece of beauty. The foray split open to a staircase of cherry wood that led down to a tiled floor of checkered black and white. It should’ve looked ridiculous, but only the center was made with these tiles. The rest was made with the continued us of the cherry wood that led up to an intricate painting on the ceiling. Sections of the fish's belly were carved out into long booths that looked like they could comfortably seat a party of eight.
Also, the smell of the food was making you almost willing to grovel to get a plate because there was no way-
“Welcome to Baratie. How may I help you?”
The fishman was polite enough with his semi-warm smile. It was the smile of a man forced to be approachable and nice all day, and not one that he meant.
“Hi. Where do we eat?”
Luffy’s smile on the other hand could make a rainbow weep.
“Do you have a reservation, sir?”
Yup. There was no way you guys could afford a place like this or apparently even have the chance to get in. You could feel your shoulders deflate as you walked over to the railing and leaned your arms against it. All the people dining - all the pirates - didn’t appear the least bit phased at your staring. Luffy pressed himself shoulder-to-shoulder with you with the two of you taking in the fancy scene before you.
To be fair, with food like what they were being served you wouldn’t care who watched you stuff your face either.
“Do we need one?”
Your forehead had already relocated itself to the cool wood of the rail. Your knees meeting the metal as you tried not to laugh at how cluelessly innocent Luffy was.
“We are very full today. I could put you on the waiting list. It’s three weeks out.”
“Maybe you want to check your book again.” Usopp walked forward, as confident as ever, and leaned himself against the hostess podium. You were expecting one of his smooth stories and instead wanted to throw yourself over the side of the railing as he finished. “You wouldn’t want to turn away the future King of the Pirates, would you?”
“And who is that supposed to be, sir?”
“Monkey D. Luffy. Perhaps you’ve heard of him?”
Based on the heavy sigh that came from the hostess you could tell his patience was wearing thin. So was his pleasantness.
“Well, in that case, I suppose we could find you a table. In three weeks.”
Usopp came to stand beside you with a smile as big as the ocean blue on his face. He was so proud, like he’d accomplished something major. Usopp had both the ability to create bullshit from thin air, and the ability to believe others would believe what he said without question. That’s why he was giving you the finger gun of celebration without noticing the look on the hostess face - or the mumbled words.
“Even out here, Doc I still got it.”
“Yeah, I can see that.”
You noticed Nami move forward as Luffy conjoined himself to your other available side. You were now perfectly sandwiched between your Captain and your best friend. Both of them jumping in giddy excitement at the idea of sitting down at any minute and eating.
“What are you going to eat, Doc?”
“I hadn’t thought about it, yet. I didn’t think we’d get past the front door.”
“Why is that?”
“She’s always been a little cynical ever since we were kids.”
You balked at Usopp’s admission and if you could’ve scoffed any louder it would’ve turned into a cough.
“I am not cynical!”
“You are literally one of the most cynical people I’ve ever met.”
“That’s because I’m one of the few people you’ve ever met who still talks to you,” you grumbled.
“See? That cynicism is turning its ugly little head right now. It’s okay, Doc. I forgive you.”
Your mouth was open, a reply stationed on your tongue, when you heard something shocking behind you. The hostess was advising Nami to follow after him and when you glanced at her as she smiled at Zoro, you wondered what had been said. All it took was for Usopp to see him beckoning for them to follow for his ego to be boosted. His hands clapping happily against yours and Luffy’s shoulders as he giggled out, “See, I told you it would work.”
You peeled yourself from the railing and headed to follow the rest of the crew when, once again, you realized Zoro was waiting at the stairs edge. He wasn’t looking at you while he waited, however, for his eyes were glued to the many possibilities of would be threats in the room.
As soon as your feet touched down on the burgundy runner that ran the length of the stairs Zoro followed after. It wasn’t like the last time when you could feel him practically right on your heels. A switch had turned on in his head and Zoro was on high alert.
Luffy took the last step in a loud double-footed jump that finally brought the attention of most of the tables to your descent. While up top, looking down from the foray, the space in the booth’s had looked massive. It still was, but a startling realization that you could end up next to Zoro left you scrambling for some space.
“I have to pee.”
You’d just gotten to the tables edge and it felt like the only thing to say to save yourself. Everyone froze for all of a few seconds before they continued scooting into the booth.
“Okay, Doc. Go to the bathroom,” Nami stated.
She looked so relaxed that you felt incredibly jealous. You wish you could be that cool, calm, and collected all the time. Except, obviously, when Luffy was testing her patience.
You turned to ask the host where it could be located when the sound of Zoro’s swords thrashing around turned your head in his direction. For a split second, he looked a little flushed. His eyes scanning the room to see if anyone had watched him try and fail, very badly, at getting his swords to go inside the booth.
“Just take them off,” you huffed at him in passing.
“I’ve got this.”
Zoro’s eyes were still trained on the room, on every pair of eyes that dared to stare back, as he moved to the other side with Nami. Even then you watched him struggle to move his swords into the alcove between the pillar and the seat.
“If you still need to use the facilities Miss, they will be right this way.”
You gave the table with Luffy and your crew mates one last look before you followed the host closely to the safety behind a locked door.
Did locking the door seem a bit much when there were four available stalls inside? Yes. When you say you needed to hear that click to signify that you were completely alone to ease some of the growing tension in your shoulders, you meant it.
You rushed over to the sink and found your hands grabbing at the porcelain to help center yourself. Your head was dizzy from the mental whiplash that seemed to be your relationship with Zoro. One minute, you couldn’t stand him and he seemed equally annoyed with your very existence. The next, he was helping you with your sea sickness or inadvertently doing things around the ship to make your life a little easier. Now, he was looking at you differently. Zoro was acting strange, but honestly, when wasn’t he?
You glanced up at your reflection in the mirror. The words falling automatically from your lips.
“So are you.”
It wasn’t all him. It never was. Cause and effect. One couldn’t exist without the other, and maybe that was why you felt the way you did gazing at your reflection. You’d been trying to deny the gravitational pull that you were hopelessly fighting against ever since you met him. Before you’d ever seen his face your soul seemed to say, “Oh, there you are.”
It wasn’t possible. It wasn’t scientific and yet here you were locked inside of a bathroom all because the thought of sitting next to him made your heart feel like it would try and flee your chest.
You allowed yourself a couple more minutes to boost yourself back up. You could do this. It was just a guy. A guy who’d tucked a flower behind your ear and looked at you like you’d both strung up the stars and drank the last bottle of his rum.
A knock on the bathroom door brought you crashing back to reality. You quickly moved over to the door to release the latch. You’d barely had any time to move back before a woman came barreling through looking not too pleased with you locking the door. You mouthed a, “sorry,” in a way of apology before you made yourself scarce and walked back out to the table.
The minute you stepped back into the main dining room you got the sense you’d missed something. Your eyes searched over the tables. You found a pair of shoes that belonged to a pair of legs that was attached to a man lying lifelessly still on the floor.
Yup. You’d most definitely missed something.
The doctor in you immediately wanted to go to the man and make sure he wasn’t dead. You could practically feel your toes point in the direction for the rest of your body to follow. You just weren’t sure if it was something you should do in a room full of pirates. Plus, no one else seemed particularly worried that he wasn’t breathing so that should be good enough for you.
You were bouncing on your feet. You wanted to go check so badly. It almost happened to where you were going to say fuck it and just go check when you noticed your waiter at your table. He was tall, strong build set inside a stylish suit with stark white hair that appeared to reach his cheeks. He didn’t look happy to be there until his eyes spotted Nami and a smile as smooth as sin slid across his face.
He is handsome.
Nami looked unimpressed and a part of you was dying to know what the hell was happening. Luckily for you, you were about to find out.
As you approached the table Zoro’s eyes that had narrowed in on their waiter flicked to your oncoming approach and…did he look worried? The annoyance that had hardened his eyes noticeably softened, his back sitting up straighter in his seat while he continued to watch you come to the table. He had his arms crossed over his chest and you wanted to scream. Everything was flexing at you and it just felt like the universe was incredibly unfair.
“Sorry guys. Uhm have you guys noticed the ugh guy just laying there on the floor” you stated.
You were looking. Again.
You were standing next to the waiter who turned to greet you, his hands tucked in his pockets - fuckin great another one. The smile had wilted at the edges until his eyes fell on you and instantly he flashed a set of pretty teeth.
“They’re alright, madam. Just a couple of men who needed to be reminded of the rules of the house. My name is Sanji and I’ll be your waiter for this evening. Is there anything that I can get you to start? Appetizers? A drink, perhaps?”
Sanji was incredibly polite and his accent was as smooth as the rest of him. His eyes were impossibly blue. While Nami’s appeared almost gray at times, especially when she became upset and the color darkened like storm clouds, Sanji’s reminded you of azure aster’s in the spring.
“What is the strongest thing you have?”
You really could use that drink. You were in the middle of taking your satchel from across your body, eyes scoping to see where you would sit, when Sanji’s reply stopped you died in your tracks.
“That would be me, sweetheart.”
Did he just wink at you?
“What’s wrong with your face?”
“I think he just does that.” Nami cut in sending your eyes to travel to where she sat inside the booth. “It’s like an involuntary tick or something.”
“Oh. Explains a lot.”
You knew Sanji could tell you were both taking the piss out of him, but there was no denying he was a good sport about it.
“Not a tick. Just a show of appreciation for two lovely ladies, such as yourselves.”
“Okay. I’ve heard enough.”
A soft yelp of surprise came from you as you felt a soft, yet calloused hand grab at your wrist and, not so gently, pull you to their side. Zoro’s side. He had just magically removed himself from the booth and was pulling you to the now open section. The section that would put you next to Nami, but also him.
“Oy, women don’t like to be manhandled like that,” Sanji interjected.
“This one likes to be manhandled quite often. We don’t need your concern.”
Usopp’s water sprayed across the table and you were willing to bet that would’ve been your very own reaction if you didn’t have a mouthful of words.
“What the hell are you talking about?” You blanched back at him.
Zoro’s attention wasn’t directed at you. He and the waiter seemed to be in a battle of…something. Even as he sat back down, his legs spread broad and arms crossed back over his chest, Zoro oozed two simple words: “Try me.”
“See, that’s your problem right there. Women don’t like to be manhandled-“
“Sometimes we do,” Nami mumbled and you had to hide your smirk with your hand.
“They like to be treated like queen’s and with respect.”
“I thought a waiter’s job was to bring food to the table. I don’t see any food.”
The tension that rose around you was palpable. The two of them acted like they were caught in a verbal pissing match. Nervously, you glanced around the table to find Usopp playing with his napkin while peeking out to look at both the men. Luffy just looked genuinely lost.
Same.
You imagined there was a chance you would never get that drink, or any food, with how this evening was turning out. Finally, with an irritated roll of his tongue along his jaw Sanji turned to the rest of the table and tried to apply that same easy going smile as before.
“I’ll be right back with your order. Please let me know if there is anything else I can get you ladies.”
“They’re fine.”
With one last glance in Zoro’s direction Sanji left and headed back into what you assumed must be the kitchen. When you were sure he was gone you turned and smacked Zoro in his arm. He didn’t even look phased.
“What?”
“‘What?’” You mimicked back at him. That earned you a stare. “What in the hell was that?”
“Seems to me like somebody was jealous.”
Usopp teased and for once when Zoro’s eyes narrowed in on him, Usopp didn’t even flinch.
“I’m not jealous of a waiter.”
“Your actions say otherwise,” Nami reminded him.
In usual Zoro fashion he didn’t respond right away. His arms tightened a little more on his chest as he situated his back higher against the back of the booth. His jaw ticking like a time bomb refusing to respond to any of your prodding.
You wanted answers. You wanted him to explain what the hell that was all about, because your skin was still burning where his hand had latched on to you. It felt possessive; a man reaching out to claim something that was his.
The world around you might as well have gone by in a blur. You knew at some point the drinks and food had been deposited on the table. You could smell the delicious food sitting in front of you; the appetizers everyone was sharing around the table. The only thing you were able to focus on was tracing the place of where his fingers had wrapped around your wrist. Your mind felt like it was held prisoner, unable to let go and it wasn’t until you felt someone’s presence leaning closer to you in the booth that you finally broke free.
“Are you not going to eat?”
Nami’s question whispered against your neck and you had to fight to suppress the shiver that threatened to move down your spine. When had she gotten so close? Nami was looking at you like you’d given her reason to worry.
How long had you been sitting there staring off into space? Your eyes drifted to glance around the table - Luffy noticeably with his mouth full - and the drink sitting in front of you.
“Oh, thank god. Booze,” you mumbled, as you reached out to take the glass.
It took you less than a minute to bring the rim to your lips and down it in two very audible gulps. You tried not to make a face as the liquor hit the back of your throat. When you’d told Sanji you wanted something strong, he’d delivered.
“Well, at least you did something other than stare off into space.”
“You know, it might not be any of my business-“
“I don’t think a sentence started that way leads to anything good.”
Usopp didn’t seem the least bit deterred by Zoro’s words. He continued to trim a piece of the meat off his steak while he glanced around the table. While you didn’t know what it was Usopp was about to say or ask, you knew one thing was for sure. You needed more-
“Beer! Yes!”
God, help you, but you were giggling from excitement of finding more alcohol. Just as you reached out to grab it, Zoro’s voice came bombarding through your good time.
“That’s mine.”
You were sure Zoro was expecting you to set the bottle back down. To not uncap the top and stare him down as you bring the bottle up to your lips and take a long, slow pull. When you finished you set your now claimed beer down in front of you.
“It was yours.”
“I was wondering, Zoro, how you got that bruise on your face?”
Usopp motioned to the exact spot where the bruise in question used to be with the hand that held his steak knife. You cringed at the idea of him hurting himself, and could feel the words of caution bubbling up on your tongue.
“I don’t have a bruise.”
“You did, though,” Luffy offered up in between his next bit. “It was on your left cheek.”
“That was me.”
Why were you raising your hand? Quickly, you set it back down in your lap. The smile that spread across your lips, however, stayed.
“Doc, let’s not go around telling tall-tales, okay,” Usopp chuckled.
“Usopp, you are the king of tall-tales. Mine is very much real,” you beamed.
Nami looked between the two of you. Her eyes got brighter with each passing second as she realized you weren’t lying.
“Oh my god,” she chuckled. “It is true, isn’t it.”
“Yup.”
You popped the p at the end for dramatic effect. Your hand grabbing a hold of your new bottle of beer that you quickly took a sip of.
“You seem way too happy about this,” Zoro grumbled, his food now forgotten.
You couldn’t deny you were enjoying retelling this moment. The way everyone else acted, it’s as if you’d taken on a giant and everyone was surprised you’d survived. If that was the case, you would have to take a page out of Usopp’s book and embellish the story just a little.
“So, there I was racing back to get to Kaya’s to save you guys, when I heard a lot of strange grunting coming from the well.”
“The one you hate?”
“Yes, Usopp, that exact one. I was going to pass by when the sounds got even worse - someone was indeed stuck inside the well. When I went over to peer across the ledge a wild Moss-haired idiot appeared from the side.”
“I’m going to have to object to this retelling.”
You waved Zoro’s words off and fought the urge to shush him.
“No interruptions, please. Now, where was I? Oh, yeah the Moss-haired idiot who came over the side-“
“And instead of helping me this psycho decided to punch me and almost send me back down the well.”
“Psycho?” You balked.
“Yeah, a psycho. What kind of person sees someone struggling to get out of a well and, instead of helping them, tries to send them back down?”
“Why are you guys always like this,” Nami cut in.
“Like what?”
“You guys act like you can’t say one nice thing to each other or it’s going to be the end of the world.”
“I can too say something nice.”
You were not going to pout. Nami’s brows raised upwards like you’d told her there was no such thing as the West Blue and that fish could fly. You crossed your arms to try and ward her off, but there was no getting away from it.
“Can I just say, this food is so good? I don’t know if I can take another bite - but I’m gonna.”
You allowed them to comment about the food. The food you still hadn’t tried. While you’d sat in silence, stewing over thoughts filled with questions and not enough answers everyone had eaten.
“Oh, man you said it.”
“I’m not going to be able to eat for a week,” Nami agreed.
“Should we get dessert?”
“I have all I need right here,” Zoro stated, his thumb flicking the top off his beer before he took a drink.
You could feel a smart ass remark sitting in the back of your throat. You wanted to say it - to see that flash of irritation darken his eyes. You liked the idea of getting under his skin, because whether you wanted to admit it or not, Zoro was definitely under yours. Maybe it would’ve been simpler if you’d stayed at Syrup Village.
“Mmm! That reminds me. We should make a toast! Everyone grab your glasses. To the best crew sailing on the sea and to our victory. Yeah!”
Luffy grabbed his glass of milk and held it up. His happiness is enough to get most of you to join him in raising a glass. Hell, it was enough to get Usopp to clink his beer against Luffy’s milk.
Beside you, Zoro smiled and took a drink from his bottle and you never wanted to be an alcoholic beverage more in your life. You needed to get out of this booth. You seriously needed to go back to the ship and think about your life choices.
“No, I’m sorry. What victory exactly?”
Nami didn’t try to make her tone flat or hide the question off her face. She was genuinely perplexed, while the rest of you were eager for any reason just to drink.
“Our victory against the marines. It was our very first battle and we crushed them.”
“I don’t know how many naval battles you guys have been a part of-“
“Two dozen, at least.”
Why did Usopp’s response not surprise you in the slightest.
“But that was a disaster,” Nami continued without missing a beat. “We were unprepared, uncoordinated. By all rights, we should be at the bottom of the sea.”
“We’re not though. Luffy saved us.”
For a split second, this Nami you were seeing was different from the one you’d spent the last few days aboard the Merry. Sure, at times she could have a prickly exterior, but never like this. Usopp defending Luffy triggered something inside her - something rage-filled and dangerous. Something born from desperation.
“Are we really going to ignore the elephant in the room right now?”
Luffy was smiling like he usually did. Unable to follow wherever Nami was leading you all, but you could sense it. You weren’t sure what drove you to try and play peacekeeper. Why you spoke her name softly between you and tried to reach out to her, only for her to pull away like you’d stung her.
“You failed to mention that your grandfather was a marine. And not just any marine, but a Vice-Admiral, at that! I don’t know about you three, but I didn’t sign up for that.”
Zoro had been listening to her through closed eyes. You weren’t sure if he was truly trying to listen or dismiss what she had to say, but it surprised you when he stepped in. His first instinct was to stick up for Luffy, something you hadn’t been expecting.
“You raided a marine base. Of course that’ll make you a target.”
“I’m sorry what?”
If you had been drinking or eating, you would’ve choked. Neither of them seemed to pay you any mind.
“If I stole the map, no one would’ve known I was there, as opposed to wrecking a base commander’s office.”
Yes, you could vaguely recall Luffy’s speech to Kaya about all the marvelous things they’d done in the few days they’d known each other. Did you necessarily believe him at the time? Not really. But now…
Before a fresh wave of thoughts could wash up in your brain, Sanji magically appeared placing the bill on the table.
“Your bill, sir.”
Luffy looked around at all of you, a soft smile playing at his lips, as he held up his finger for all of you to wait. He quickly signed the receipt and handed it back.
“Thank you, my good man.”
Sanji took the bill back, his eyebrow quirked up as he read whatever Luffy had signed at the bottom. Whatever it was sent a grin wider than the East Blue to brighten up his face.
“No, sir. Thank you.”
Luffy waited for Sanji to leave the table before he looked back at you all. For once, he wasn’t all smiles. All that care-free energy was contained and replaced with a seriousness you weren’t sure you liked.
“Look, I’m not saying it’s good that the Marines are on our tail, but we showed them that they can’t just roll over us. This crew, our crew, can handle anything.”
It would’ve been a riveting Captain's speech if it wasn’t interrupted the second he finished speaking.
“Who the hell is Monkey D. Luffy?”
The voice that rang across the Baratie was thick with age. You didn’t have to look far to know it belonged to the older gentleman who stood at the entrance to what you could only assume was the kitchen. His peg leg made clunking noises off the tile as he made his way towards the table.
How did he know where to go? Luffy was just leaning out the side of the booth waving ever so-slightly with his smile back on his face. “Here.”
“You seem to be confused about the rules of the house, but Baratie doesn’t offer credit. You eat, you pay.”
How much is the food?
You only had thirty-three Berry to your name. You started to reach inside your bag when Luffy waved you to stop. The older Chef looked from you and back to Luffy who placed his hands together like he was about to pray.
“I think you’re confused. The meal has already been paid for. I just haven’t given you the money yet.”
“Yeah, and how’s that?”
“You can add it to my treasure tab.”
Your forehead hit the edge of the table so fast you weren’t even sure it actually hurt.
“And what, pray tell, is that?”
“I may not look like a big deal yet, but you’re talking to the future King of the Pirates. And as soon as I find the One Piece, I’m going to come back, pay this bill in full, and with interest.”
At least the Chef had the decency to chuckle before he lurched down and grabbed Luffy by the front of his overalls.
“I got a better idea.”
You watched as he placed Luffy in front of him with a controlling hand held on to his shoulder. A way to keep him from running, if he tried, but you knew Luffy would go without a fight. You glanced around the table to find no one making a move to follow.
“You guys are seriously just going to sit here,” you huffed.
Nami leaned her head back against the booth. Her eyes looking up at the ceiling and refusing to look anywhere else.
“I need a drink.”
“Yeah,” Zoro chuckled as he grabbed a hold of what was left of his beer. “Now you’re talking.”
You’d waited until they all removed themselves from the booth before you slipped away. You were sure the three of them wouldn’t miss your presence as you made your way towards the kitchen. It wasn’t until you’d passed the last pillar before the kitchen that you felt the familiar touch of calloused fingers wrap themselves lazily around your wrist.
The tug you felt this time was softer - a plea for your attention instead of forcing it. You weren’t sure what you expected when you turned around. If Zoro would be his usual unreadable smoothness like stone or if the corner of his eyes would be tinged with annoyance. There were only a few possibilities that you’d grown accustomed to and all of them were nothing of what you got.
When you turned to meet him, Zoro didn’t look like he usually did. The hardness that kept him unreadable was replaced with something softer. His lips parted as he searched your face with your wrist still held loosely in his hand.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to help, Luffy.”
“Luffy, can handle himself.”
“Zoro-“
You weren’t sure why your tone had come off saying his name as breathy as it did. As if you were both tucked inside the alcove of a church hiding to keep from being caught doing something forbidden. You also couldn’t explain why when he dropped your wrist from his hand you’d chosen to place it on his chest. It wasn’t until you’d done that you realized just how close you both were.
“I’m not going to leave him to do dishes by himself until he tells me too.”
“How do you know he’s doing dishes?”
“Why the hell else would he take him into the kitchen?”
“Good point.”
You removed your hand from his chest and, for a split second, you thought you saw a glint of loss.
“You guys head to the bar and I’ll meet you there shortly.”
Zoro made no move to leave. He stood there looking every bit as intimidating as a man with three swords could be, while also looking seemingly lost. He appeared to be thinking something over - a debate in his mind about whether or not he should even say whatever was weighing heavily there.
You almost told him to just spit it out, but he looked like he would rather chew on razor blades than say whatever it was. When Zoro finally got it off his chest it sounded like he’d choked.
“What about the waiter?”
Confusion clouded your features as you replied, “What about him? Do you need me to find him for you or-“
Zoro waved you off. He looked more awkward now than you’d ever seen him. All the cool confidence that he’d oozed seemingly gone in the blink of an eye, and replaced with a hand behind his neck and eyes that refused to meet yours.
“No. I mean be careful of the waiter?”
“I’m confused.” That was an understatement. “Is there something I’m missing about this waiter?”
“No - it's - never mind. I’ll just see you when you finish doing whatever it is you plan to do.”
“Okay.”
“What are you planning to do?”
Your head was metaphorically and literally spinning from the conversation. One second, Zoro looked ready to follow after Usopp and Nami who were no doubt already at a table with drink in hand. The next, he seemed uncharacteristically bashful.
You didn’t want to smile. What if it ruined the moment?
“I plan on helping Luffy by helping the Chef.”
“I’m going to pretend that makes sense.”
When you gave him a thumbs up in response you wished lightning would’ve come down and burnt you to a crisp. What made it worse? From the smile that was beginning to work its way at the corners of Zoro’s lips, you could practically hear what he was going to say.
“You really are masterful with replies.”
“Okay, well, I’m gonna go in there now,” you stated. Your body slowly backed away from him and the heart stopping smile that was only growing wider.
When did he start smiling at you like that?
You were almost to the swinging double doors when someone came rushing through and collided immediately with your back. The sound of dishes crashing sent your eyes wide and finally tore you away from the swordsman in front of you.
“Fuck.”
“Oi, what’s going on out here?”
Double fuck.
You stooped down to help the waiter pick up the pieces of plates that had shattered on the ground and the food right along with it.
“What the bloody hell is going on ‘ere?”
Looking up from your crouched position on the floor, you were greeted by the same Chef who had pulled Luffy into the back. Without thinking you jolted to stand upright to face him with your hands struggling to keep the pieces of broken plate from dropping.
“I came to help my Captain in your kitchen.”
As the words left your mouth, so too did a couple pieces of a plate.
“No.”
It was abrupt. It was harsh and it was final. He didn’t even give you a chance to try and change his mind. The hard sound of his peg leg turning back into the kitchen cutting off whatever your next sentence might have been.
“Hey! I can help!”
You pushed through the double doors and narrowly missed a cook passing by with a flaming piece of meat sautéing in the pan. You pulled a face and quickly moved away. This time you were watching closely where you were going and playing extra close attention to the fast pace movements happening around you.
For someone so large, the Chef made his way with ease around the kitchen. You weren’t sure if he was just light on his feet or if everyone in the kitchen just learned to work around him.
“No.” He sounded like he’d smoked two packs of smokes a day and finished it off by gargling with a cigar. “What you can do is get out of my kitchen before you make more of a mess.”
“Hey Doc!” Luffy waved from his place in the corner. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to help you.”
And to show how helpful you were, you placed the broken pieces of plate down on the table. The old man regarded him momentarily before looking back at you.
“You’re with him?”
“Yeah I am.”
The old man turned back to Luffy, a large thumb pointed back to you as he spoke, “She broke a couple plates outside. That’s also added to your tab.”
“Oh, okay wait!” You came around the corner of a cutting station, arms still out in front of you like you were warding off a bear. “That’s why I'm here. I have a service I think would benefit you.”
“And what, pray tell, would that be?”
You put on your brightest smile and flared your arms out in front of you like you were a prize to behold.
“I’m a doctor.”
You expected a different reaction. A completely different reaction to him looking like he was about to make you fish food.
“Get out of my kitchen.”
“Did you hear me-“
“I heard you just fine, girl. What I need is for you to get out of my kitchen.”
The way he called you girl reminded you of Naan. It was the same tone that was used to tell you that you were in the way. You weren’t helping. You were just being a pain in the ass. There were more than a handful of times that you’d told Naan you could help; you knew enough to assist with minor surgeries. To help with childbirth when the women came in hollering and screaming like their body was being broken and molded anew.
You’d spent your whole life learning how to forage and create and heal. You knew you could help - that you could ease this man’s pain.
“No.”
When crystal blue eyes honed in on your position you refused to bend. You stared back at him and for the first time ever you squared your own shoulders in defiance.
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Your stump - I bet it hurts you something awful. The problem with prosthetics is that they still rub the skin - can bruise. What if I tell you that I can make you a salve that can alleviate that for you?”
He’d placed his hands on his hips somehow making him appear broader. He was trying to intimidate you, but he had nothing on a little old lady and her cane.
“She is really the best doctor in all of the East Blue. If your leg really does hurt you, why not let Doc try and see if it helps?”
He looked from Luffy and back to you - his eyes showing how undecided he was. You thought you were going to have to try again when he finally replied, “You got one hour before the second dinner. If it isn’t as good as you say I’m doubling what he owes me.”
The joy you felt at winning something was quickly taken from you as you resisted the urge to chase after him.
“Wait what?!”
The old man wasn’t going to answer you. He was too busy walking away, off to see something about food. You didn’t even get a chance to ask him for a pot or if he had any mortars in his kitchen. You glanced over at Luffy who was giving you two thumbs up and smiling his usual smile.
At least one of you believed in you.
You were about to remind him that you were left with nothing to use when the waiter from earlier, Zoro’s best friend, magically appeared. His jacket was now missing and the sleeves of his dress shirt were rolled up to expose his forearms.
“I’m assuming you’re in need of some assistance.”
A breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding released from you in a soft laugh of gratitude.
“Yes, please! I need a pot and mortar and pestle. If you can direct me where to get them-“
“No, I can get them for you. I live to serve.”
Sanji spared you one last parting smile before he moved swiftly around the kitchen collecting what you’d asked. Everything else you either already had in your satchel or you could easily run back to the ship to get. Somewhere in the back of your mind, when Sanji came back to hand you your requested items and winked, you swore you could hear Zoro’s teeth grinding in irritation.
Zeff, as you later learned from Sanji, had given you all of one hour to make your salve. You’d finished in forty minutes.
The kitchen had been cleared out and empty, which you learned was the usual between the break up in the first, second, and third dinner. It also meant it gave you ample time to look over Zeff’s leg. Not that the old man looked the least bit thrilled about it.
His rough exterior was making it hard for you not to be a little jumpy. Add in the extra audience of both Luffy and Sanji who seemed to be fascinated just from you removing the old man’s boot a little harder to work.
The minute you’d removed the wooden prosthetic from his knee you immediately could see the bruising. The hard rashes that bleed across the skin leaving angry marks that almost threatened to make the skin weep. You couldn’t keep the air from hissing between your teeth as you took in a sharp breath.
You could hear Zeff too. The way he tried to swallow back down a groan that threatened to become something close to a cry of pain. Gently, you set it aside and started getting to work. Your hands pull out clean linen and wrap from your satchel and the green chiterra you’d just harvested.
You got up from where you sat and poured warm water into a bowl Luffy just cleaned. Immediately, you placed a clean cloth inside until it was completely soaked and rung it out before you gently placed it on his stump. You could hear the whistle of pain flash between his teeth, but you didn’t look to see if he was glaring at you still. You continued to smash up the chiterra until it made a paste.
Once you knew everything was ready, you gently began to clean the skin; exposing the places where the rash had torn skin. In those areas you placed the chiterra and in the areas where no broken skin showed you deposited the salve. The minty scent enveloped the space and as you began to wrap up Zeff’s leg, you dared to peek at him.
“What is that smell? Mint?”
“Aloe Vera. It helps with burns and irritations on the skin. I figured it would help soothe your skin. Give you some relief.”
“Hmmm.”
It was a sound you’d grown up with. Naan made the same kind when she was unsure of what to say. When she wasn’t ready to admit you were right or that you’d proven yourself capable.
“There.” You huffed as you put the prosthetic back on. “Make sure you wash it at least once a day. The salve can be put on two to three times daily. Don’t be scared to be generous with it and-“ you pulled the piece of paper you’d written the measurements and ingredients on. Your fingers waving it back and forth in front of him just to make sure you had his attention. “I’ll give you the recipe if you knock off more than half of what Luffy owes you. Deal?”
“You really think your fancy medicine is worth more than my food?”
“Is it worth more than your comfort? You tell me: how does your leg feel now?”
You tried to hide your growing smile as you could see the battle Zeff was warring on in his head. While he was old and stubborn, you knew relief from pain of any kind was usually the path most took.
With a heavy sigh, Zeff put his hand out for the paper and you knew you had him. This time you did allow a cheeky smile to celebrate.
“Your Naan teach you to be a pain in the ass like this too?”
“Nope. That I’ve learned all on my own.”
“Sounds about right.”
You leaned back on the stool and watched as Zeff began to get up. The caution his body had grown accustomed too every time he moved was noticeable in his slow movements.
“I told you she was the best in all of the East Blue.”
Luffy looked so proud. You weren’t sure what you expected, but the amount of pride he radiated was something new to you. Sure, you’d had Naan tell you that you did good but it wasn’t the same. There was something about the way Luffy looked at people - really looked - to the point for the first time you felt seen.
Luffy didn’t just say he thought you were the best because he was trying to talk you up. He believed in you and what you could do.
“Yeah, that may be so, but you still owe me some clean dishes.”
“I’ll get right on it.”
He smacked the top of the chair he’d been sitting in as he got up. He didn’t argue or call for a rest. Luffy simply headed back towards the sink to finish on the load of dishes he’d left as they’d watched you work. The idea of him still slaving away in the space while you were all out there enjoying yourselves didn’t feel right.
“You should be able to go out with the rest of us and have a drink.”
“I’ll be alright here. You go on ahead and meet the rest of the crew. I’ll be with you guys soon enough.”
How soon? It didn’t feel right to leave him there. Even worse to bring over dishes you’d gotten dirty for him to wash in the end.
“At least let me wash these, Luffy.”
He’d opened his mouth to tell - what? To tell you to go again, most likely but you never actually heard him say it. Right when he was about to speak, Sanji was just there. His hands gently taking the dishes out of yours and walking over to place them beside the sink.
“How about I do these dishes for you.”
“Why would you do that?”
Sanji glanced away from you for a moment. His eyes focusing in on a memory, maybe. Whatever it was memory or thought, his eyes went into a thousand yard stare. One that was untouchable as the clouds. Finally, he turned to look at you and a touch of a smile was back.
“Zeff is cantankerous old shit bag but-“
“But he’s your cantankerous old shit bag. I get it.”
And you did. Naan and Zeff had a lot in common, specifically in their not-so-great parenting that wasn’t parenting skills. Even more so in the way they tried to make it seem like any help you tried to give wasn’t going to be good enough. You’d just come to realize that, while at first you’d hated Naan for always telling you it just wasn’t good enough, whatever you did, you realized as you got older it was because she knew you could do better. Would you have preferred a hug? A lighter lesson sharing a cup of hot chocolate? Hell yeah you would’ve but…this was okay too.
The closed smile Sanji wore cracked a little as you finished his sentence. A smile of realizing someone else understood seemed to make the tension ease from his shoulders just a bit.
“I’ll wash these up for you and let’s say, in return, you have a drink with me later.”
He’d remove the dish towel from his shoulders; his right hand tightened inside the fabric as he used it to prop himself up just a little. He was leaning against the counter with that soft, inviting smile still barely showing any teeth. You realized as you considered his offer you liked it better when he was smiling just a little too wide; all the flirting making him happier than he seemed now.
Fuck you wondered what Zoro would do if he knew what you were about to say? What did it matter anyways? It wasn’t like you belonged to each other or had feelings or…you know…whatever.
It was your turn to take your head out of the clouds and look back over at Sanji. He wasn’t being pushy. You were sure if you told him no he would be a gentleman about it. So, taking a deep breath you finally gave him your response.
“A drink would be good.”
What in the absolute hell’s were you doing?
In a matter of a millisecond, Sanji brightened up and it made your chastising fall short. It couldn’t be that big of a deal if it made him this happy, it could it?
“Great. I’ll finish up here and find you at the bar.”
“Alright. I guess I’ll see you in a bit then.”
You replaced your satchel over your shoulder and started to make your way towards the back door. You weren’t even sure where the bar was. Wherever it was you knew a certain Moss-haired swordsman would be there with the others.
“Good. It’s a date.”
You whirled around so fast the vertigo almost threatened to topple you over.
“Ugh, it is not a date.”
“Sounds like a date to me,” Sanji teased, his hand flipping the dish towel back over his shoulder.
He looked so smug. Why were all the men you were running into either smug, attractive, and a pain in the ass? Well, besides Luffy, that is. He was becoming your sunshine son whether he agreed or not.
“It sounds like a drink,” you responded.
Your feet were still carrying you to the back door, but you honestly couldn’t get there fast enough.
“A drink under the stars and hushed conversation.”
“To have a hushed conversation you have to be like this close,” using your hands you indicate the amount of space necessary to make that even a remote possibility, “and it’s in a crowded place, which means yelling.”
“You’re adorable you know when you’re all flushed like that.”
“Excuse me while I go throw myself overboard.”
“Doc! Make sure Nami or Usopp get you out!” Luffy called after you. “I won’t be able to go in.”
You weren’t going to tell him it was a figure of speech. He seemed so genuinely concerned that you would just throw yourself off that you kind of didn’t want to ruin the moment. One last glance at Sanji before you left out the back door, and you debated whether you were joking or not.
You weren’t exactly sure where you were heading, you just knew that there was the sound of music. Music usually meant very few things. Either someone was having a dinner party with music playing in the background, highly unlikely, or you were headed directly for the bar.
The bar where your crew mates were at. The bar that Zoro was at and the same bar Sanji would come looking for you at later. God, how soon was later? The thought made each new step you took sound more pronounced, louder than the last as you practically dragged yourself into the fish’s mouth.
It wasn’t an incredibly large space. It was pretty crowded already, and if it wasn’t for its size you would’ve worried you wouldn’t have been able to find them. Luckily for you, Usopp spotted you first and waved you over to the table they’d claimed right at the edge of the fish’s lip.
While Nami and Zoro were nursing a beer and whiskey, respectfully, Usopp apparently found a punch bowl. By the looks of said punch bowl and the glossy look hollowing out Usopp’s eyes, you knew you were going to need one just as big.
“Where did you get that fish bowl and do they have more?” You asked, removing your satchel and sitting down next to Nami.
“Nice of you to finally join us.”
“Oh, it’s so nice to be missed.”
You clutched your hands dramatically to your chest causing Nami to bump into you playfully in response.
“In all seriousness though, I’m going to need one of those fish bowls. ASAP.”
“I don’t know if you want one, Doc,” Usopp replied before taking another long pull from his straw. “It tastes just like candy. I don’t even think there is any liquor in this.”
“Pace yourself.” Zoro warned. “Last time I said that I ended up face down underneath a table.”
You leaned forward, your elbows resting on the small table, as you cupped your chin in your hands. You tried for cute and tried to smile that ended up squished between cheeks and hands.
“What were you doing under the table?”
“Napping,” he replied curtly.
“No one chooses to nap under a table in a bar.”
“I’ve napped in the crow’s nest on the Merry a few times.”
Yup. There was definitely liquor in that fishbowl.
“By the way, if you see Sanji let me know. I inadvertently may have slightly agreed to have a drink with him.”
“Nami’s boyfriend?”
“Nami’s what?”
“The waiter?!”
“He is not my boyfriend,” Nami protested a finger up to signify to Usopp to make a point, “and what is happening?”
“He asked after I fixed up Zeff’s - the big angry Chef - leg. I made a little salve for him to help take the pain away when he wore the prosthetic.”
“And somehow that led to you being asked for a drink?”
“I guess?” You shrugged.
“Man, I gotta try that,” Usopp mumbled as he took another long sip through his straws.
“I knew I shouldn’t have left you alone.”
Your eyes panned over to Zoro. His arms painfully tight across his chest and his jaw wasn’t faring any better. It looked painful. You wanted to remind him it was possible to get lockjaw just from grinding your teeth into dust.
“Well, I’m going to go get me a fishbowl.”
You remove yourself from your newly claimed spot and walk over towards the bar. The bartender himself seemed easy enough, happy to take your money, and even happier to take a tip as he handed over your drink. It was so heavy that you thought it would take you half a decade just to get it back to the table without spilling it. So, the best way to combat spillage was by starting to drink some down.
Usopp was right. They did taste exactly like candy.
When you arrived back at the table, it was noticeably more quiet. Nami’s eyes focused on her now empty glass that she swirled around in her hand. Zoro wasn’t looking at you, as per usual, as if you’d done something wrong and Usopp was busy finishing off his drink. You weren’t sure how to inject yourself back into a conversation that had grown stagnant. You weren’t born with the ease of conversation; not like Nami who always seemed to know what to do. When to smile and the right words to make someone open up. You’d only take a couple of sips of your drink when Zoro’s gruff voice sliced into the silence.
“What are you holding onto that is so heavy?”
He took a drink from his own glass as he waited for Nami to speak. To lift her head up or show any signs that she’d heard him.
“You guys seriously don’t think what Luffy did was messed up?”
You weren’t following. You were too busy taking another drink, eyes darting between the two of them. You felt silly. Obviously, whatever was bothering Nami wasn’t a secret. It wasn’t something she was holding close to ruin you all later, but whatever it was that weighed on her she felt Luffy had done something detrimental. Almost.
Zoro regarded her evenly before he set his glass back down on his thigh. His gaze looked away from her as he replied, “Yeah. He should’ve told us. But if you haven’t noticed we’ve been making enemies everywhere we go. Psycho clowns, killer butlers: what are the Marines going to do?”
“You don’t understand. I can’t get caught not when I’m so close-“
Nami looked ready to break. The tears of panic that edged at the corners of her eyes made all the earlier playfulness disappear. The sharpness of words you threatened to say to defend Luffy losing their edge as you watched her stare into her glass like it would be able to give her all the answers. To tell her it would all be okay.
Zoro looked between you and Usopp, who was doing his best to not be a part of this particular conversation. His lips wrapped around the straws buried deep in his drink and refused to let go.
Men.
You were about to reach out to her, to ask her if she was okay, really okay, not just the kind you pretend to be through words when a mask of a smile was back on her face. She set down her glass and gave a quick glance around the table before clapping her hands down on her bare legs and lifting up out of her seat.
“Who wants a drink? It’s on me.”
“That’s my favorite kind.”
“Of course it is.”
You ignored Zoro’s stare as Nami removed herself from the booth - from all of you. She was more than halfway to the bar when you reached over and smacked Zoro’s shoulder. He looked surprised for all of a second before he looked from his shoulder and back to you.
“‘That’s my favorite kind.’” You mimicked. “God, who says that?”
“Someone who likes free drinks?” Usopp offered up.
“You are both -“
“Impossible. We know.”
Shaking your head, you shimmied out of the booth and started making your way through the groups of people. You could barely see Nami up ahead with an older gentleman speaking to her. A spindle of curiosity began to weave its way inside your belly and filled your head with questions. He didn’t seem to be flirting with her or trying. No, they seemed to be discussing business.
“Nami.”
You spoke her name lightly the way you would an animal that was skittish. The hand you’d reached out to tap her shoulder falling short as she turned halfway to face you.
“Hey, Doc, what are you doing?”
“I came to check on you.”
Nami pulled a face, her shoulders shrugging just enough to brush off your words.
“I promise you, I’m just fine. I don’t need a check-up or anything like that.”
The bartender chose at that moment to set down a bottle of rum and four shot glasses, which Nami grabbed immediately. She thanked him with a smile and turned to head back to the table forcing you to practically run after her.
“Nami- Nami, wait!”
“What do you want?!”
The anger of her words forced you to take a step back. Your hands raised just to let her know you meant her no harm.
“Do you remember when I told you that you had a friend in Syrup village?”
“What about it?”
“While I didn’t stay in the village, I’m still your friend and while I may not be able to protect you like Zoro, or be full of sunshine and stretchy like Luffy, or hell, be as sharp as Usopp with a slingshot I’m still here for you. Does that make sense?”
“I think?”
“I Just- okay look I’m not good at this either. My only friend I had was Usopp and I’m not sure how to say this but if you need to talk or if anything is bothering you, you can tell me. I’m not going to judge you or you know…”
It all felt like it was going good in your head and then you breathed, started talking, and for some reason panicked. Bless Nami for finding it all vaguely amusing, from what you could tell, because the smile that graced her lips was the one you’d come to expect. Bright and full of the youth sometimes you feel like she’d missed.
“Why do you get so awkward at the end of long speeches?”
Her words were light and airy; full of the laughter that flowed through each one. You allowed her go wrap her arm around your shoulders as you both moved back to the table. Your own laughter threatening to burst at any minute.
“I don’t get awkward.”
You could hear the eye roll she gave as you both began to release one another. You wouldn’t fit in the booth this way if you didn’t.
“Every time. Without fail. You start off so strong.”
“I just get nervous that I’m not making any sense, especially when you’re saying things that matter.”
“What you said back there matters?”
She’d placed the rum and glasses down on the table. Usopp’s fishbowl long since emptied and Zoro was moving towards the bottle at Lightning speed, as if he couldn’t wait to meet oblivion. Before Nami disappeared back into the booth you gently grabbed her hand to stop her making sure she faced you completely before you spoke low enough for only her to hear.
“It matters because you matter to me, Nami. All jokes aside, just don’t forget I’m here for you.”
Her eyes pricked with the edge of tears but she quickly nodded and turned away from you. The only proof you’d gotten she heard you was the soft squeeze of her hand in yours just before she let you go.
“God, I don’t know which one of them is worse. Can that even be classified as dancing?”
Nami’s soft laughter filtered over to him and Zoro couldn’t help but respond with a smile. At some point, you’d dived head first into too many of the giant fishbowls, deciding not to heed his warning, and come out the other side completely and utterly shit faced. So, when Usopp asked you to join him out on the dance floor, you didn't hesitate. For the last hour, Zoro wished there was a camera around just to hold this moment hostage from time.
He watched as you did moves he was willing to bet, if you were sober, would flush your cheeks in the rosy hue he’d found himself becoming obsessed with ever since he’d placed that snowdrop behind your ear. Another moment that time had taken he’d hoped to have burned into his memory. The way you’d looked up at him shifted something inside him, and Zoro wasn’t sure if he could ever get it back, or if he even cared it was gone.
You were in the middle of your next move - one arm behind your head while the other was close to your side. Your shoulder rotating in strange circles as your body bounced off beat. Usopp had gone back to doing a shuffle beside you that broke you out of your dance and into his.
Zoro could feel a smile threatening to burst its way on to his lips. Quickly, he brought his beer up and took a long pull from the glass.
“You’re different with her.” Every word was punctuated. Slow. As if Nami was afraid saying it too fast would spook him.
He took the glass from his lips and set it back on his thigh. His hand still wrapped around the cool mug as he finally regarded Nami.
“I’m not different with anybody.”
“Well, that’s not true. You’re different with Luffy; with us. I’m betting you don’t look at us the way you look at her, though.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
It’s nothing.
God, he wanted it to be true. Even now, however, he could feel his neck straining to stay facing Nami’s direction. He wanted to look back and see what you were doing. To make sure you were safe.
And that waiter hadn’t magically appeared.
Nami must have known he was lying. She may have been a thief, but Zoro had come to realize her bullshit calling meter was the best he’d ever seen. She regarded him coolly with her brows raised in mock shock.
“I have eyes, Zoro. Unless you’re looking at me the same way when I’m not looking - it’s different.”
If he played it cool, kept his face free of emotion, and didn’t react he could still call her a liar. It was a solid plan that would’ve worked if his jaw hadn’t ticked in annoyance. Zoro wasn’t annoyed with Nami. He was annoyed at himself for being caught wanting something -someone - besides his goal.
He looked down into the safety of the amber liquid in his glass. Unsure of what - how - to begin to deny you hadn’t snuck in and taken a piece of him and called it yours. Luckily, he didn’t have to.
“Look,” Nami sighed. “I know you’ve got your own thing going on. Who doesn’t.”
“Why do I feel like there’s a but coming,” he grumbled.
“But it’s okay to still want other things too.”
Zoro allowed himself to look up from the safety of the glass and willed himself to appear emotionless as he considered her. His mind was still mulling over her words and what Nami could possibly be trying to get at.
“Oh yeah? Like what?”
“Like her.”
No.
In a flash, Zoro could see how simple it would be to have you. His imagination ran in a million directions, in a trillion scenarios of a life that held a path for you to walk with him. He almost gave in and allowed the warmth of the idea of touching you, knowing you, to consume him until a clash of swords resonated in his mind.
As fast as it was created, it was destroyed. He found himself back in the woods standing in front of Kuina, so full of fire and life. The determination lit a fire in her eyes until he could’ve sworn he’d be consumed.
“Until one of us is the greatest swordsman who ever lived.”
It was his goal then just like she had been his goal - and it had remained his goal even now. Zoro couldn’t allow himself to lose sight of that. It was his dream to be the world’s greatest swordsman, but it had also been hers.
Kuina.
Zoro could still see her there waiting for him. Dead and dried leaves crunching under her feet as she waited for him to meet her in the clearing, her eyes brimming with challenge.
Zoro could almost feel his muscles taut and ready to go to her. His thumb playing at the hilt of his sword, to pull it out in one smooth motion and come forward those last few feet in a class of steel. He could feel his feet moving and the sound of the leaves crunching under his weight. He was almost to her when the sound of laughter floating through the breeze like a wind chime forced him to stop. He didn’t know who or what it was, or why his first thought was you, but when he turned to glance behind him he felt his heart stop.
He was suddenly standing back in the lavender fields at Irkhaven. Zoro’s eyes scanned around until you were there, like Kuina, standing just out of reach. You were surrounded by a sea of purple and sunlight that only seemed to brighten as you smiled in his direction. It was the smile that warmed him down to his bones and made his chest ache for once with something other than sadness and guilt. Zoro wouldn’t dare think it - risk saying it - in case this was some kind of spell.
You spoke his name - beckoning him to follow you - just like Kuina. Underneath all of your softness you held your own fire, your own determination, that made you appear wild. The wind whipping at your hair and turning you ethereal amongst all the life that you held within your eyes.
Zoro could feel himself stuck between the place where he began and the place where he was going. Where you were waiting with Luffy, Usopp, and Nami. A place he never imagined his life would take him and yet…
The sound of Nami almost shouting his name shook him out of his thoughts and the sound of cracking glass filtered through moments later. He could feel the glass in his hand fracturing; dangerously close to collapsing inward if he squeezed harder. He set the weeping glass down and spared a glance to Nami as he removed himself from the seat.
“Hey, Zoro, are you okay?”
He hated how he could see the concern was etched into every crease of her features. The way she pretended to care. He made sure his hand was secured on the Wado Ichimonji before he stood to his full height. His eyes glancing over at you and Usopp now entrenched in a dance battle.
Suddenly, being inside the mouth of a fish made him feel like he was being swallowed whole. He couldn’t be near you - couldn’t risk confessing in the heat of a drunken moment that you had consumed him, mind and soul, and he wasn’t sure if he cared.
“I gotta go back to the Merry. Forgot something.”
“Forgot what? Zoro? Zoro!”
He didn’t look behind him to see what Nami was doing. Their earlier game of “guess my trauma,” officially over as he rushed towards the next dock. The pounding of his heart reminding him of the dangers of caring; of allowing yourself to get wrapped up in other people.
To this day, Zoro could still feel the ice that pierced his heart when he was told Kuina was gone. The way the world seemed to shift into madness and somehow remain the same. It was his mind that could no longer make sense of a world where she no longer resided. Zoro would’ve gone to the gates of hell to get her back if he could and with the searing vision of your smile, head whipped back in joy, Zoro felt that same exact emotion he’d felt over seven years ago.
He would tear the world apart to keep you in it and that was a confession he couldn’t afford to say.
For the last hour Zoro had been able to sit in the stillness of the ship and enjoy the silence. The only intrusive sound was that of things moving below the water and the of the wet stone sliding across the Wado Ichimonji.
It’d taken him longer than he’d ever admit to collect himself. His meditation hadn’t been able to clear his mind the way it usually did, and it wasn’t until he’d begun to take care of Kuina’s blade that his thoughts had ceased.
Of course, all good things were meant to come crashing down.
“How long do you think you’re going to hide out here and pout?”
Zoro’s wrist stopped mid-motion down the sword. His eyes unable to tear away from the moonlight gleaming on the blade just in case looking at you sent him reeling over the edge again.
Being alone with you on the Merry was about the worst thing that could happen to him. At least at the bar he would have continued to play twenty questions with Nami and been surrounded by plenty of sound to help drown out whatever was going on with him.
You aren’t focused.
But he was, wasn’t he? In the last seven years, Zoro had devoted himself to his training. To become stronger. Faster. The only swordsman to use three swords and earn the name of The Demon. With every waking hour Zoro was closer to becoming who he - who she - dreamed of being.
The sound of your footsteps drawing closer almost made him delirious. His hand tightening down on the wet stone before he set it down beside him. His eyes turned out to look once more into the endless midnight in front of him.
“Who says I’m hiding?”
His voice sounded rough, like it hadn’t been used in months. He picked up the rum he’d taken from his room and took a swig to clear his throat and his senses. By the time he finished taking his drink, you were standing beside where he sat on the crate. Your arms wrapped around your middle with your hip cocked looking like you were ready to give him hell.
I am hiding.
It was the only clear thought he had as his eyes adjusted to your presence. Your eyes were glassy from the alcohol even though you were trying to make it seem like you were sober, he guessed. But Zoro could tell you were tipsy with the way you swayed along with each push of the ocean’s wave against the ship.
He and Nami were going to have a talk about dressing you next time. Every part of you felt exposed to him and yet, it wasn’t enough. It was all just a game, teasing him constantly no matter what angle he looked at it. What was even worse was how the moon highlighted you in light and half in shadow.
“I say you are and we both know I’m usually right.”
A sly smile slid across his lips before he could stop it. His eyes transfixed while you took the finishing steps until you stood before him. With your arms back down at your side you felt more open to him, vulnerable somehow. It was the look in your eyes that told him why.
Maybe he wasn’t just imagining it too but what did it prove? You were both idiots on a sinking ship. Looking up at you now, the way you shamelessly devoured every inch the moonlight provided your eyes he knew you’d both happily drown.
“Is that so?”
“It’s the new unwritten rule on the ship.”
“Guess I’m going to have to have a talk with Luffy about that.”
“He’s still in the kitchen finishing up dishes if you want to be a good first mate and help him.”
“I should go help him.”
“The waiters in there with him, though.”
“He doesn’t need my help that bad.”
Zoro wasn’t sure what it was that made your head fall back the way it did. What it was that caused you to laugh the way you did with your hand covering your mouth as if it was enough to silence it. He didn’t know what he did, but he swore he would do it again just to see you like this.
“Is that why you are hiding out on the ship? Afraid of some competition?”
You went to sit down next to him and his hand reached out to grab you by your hip to stop you. It was meant to be a gesture to get you to stop. Instead, his hand slid under the fabric of the corset and he could hear the audible sharp whistle as you sucked in a breath. He wondered if you would let him keep it there, if you’d let him pull you closer until you were perfectly positioned between his legs.
As fast as his hand and touched you it retreated and it was his turn to stand.
“Let’s cut the chit chat. I have something better in mind.
“You seriously think now is a good time to train?”
You couldn’t believe it. Your brain was still a mess from seconds ago when his hand somehow found its way under your clothes. The way he’d looked up at you, you half expected him to pull you closer. The hunger that flashed in obsidian eyes was enough to make you think you were about to find out just how plush his lips might actually be.
As fast as it happened it ended and the disappointment was raw in your chest. Zoro, on the other hand, looked right at home.
“Why not? Did you have something else in mind?”
Yes.
“No,” you grumbled.
You were most definitely not pouting.
“Good. First, you have to fix your stance.”
“Okay, how should I be-“
A scream of shock left you as you nearly jumped out of your skin. You turned just in time to see him slide the handle of a sword back inside the sheath. The same one that he’d used mere seconds ago to smack against your bare thigh.
“Did you just spank me with your sword?”
God, he looked too pleased with himself.
“I could do it again, if you like.”
You could feel your mouth opening and closing. You didn’t know what to say. Yes, please do? That felt too desperate and yelling at him would do nothing but prove you did like it in some weird way.
Shit. Your cheeks were burning.
“How about we just direct me, verbally, like a normal sensei would do.”
“You could also call me master, instead of sensei, if you like.”
Zoro had stepped close to you - close enough if you leaned back just an inch you would be against him. His words were dripped heavily with teasing, but the way the husk of his tone whispered along your skin like a caress threatened to make your knees buckle.
This was supposed to be training for god sake. Clearing your throat, you dared to lean your head back just enough it rested on his chest. Your eyes batting up at him as you replied, “Or I can just call you an asshole.”
A heavy sigh blew through his nose as he stepped away from you, almost sending you falling on your ass.
“Do you even have a weapon?”
“There are pots in the kitchen,” you deadpanned.
Zoro looked at you like he would throw you over the side of the ship at any minute.
“I mean a real weapon.”
“My knife is in my satchel.”
You both stood there staring at one another. You weren’t sure what he was expecting you to do. If you were just magically supposed to make your satchel appear or leave to go get it. Zoro wasn’t saying much. He was just standing there one hand on his sword and a thumb tucked into his sash.
“Are you going to keep staring at me all night or are you going to go get it?”
Whatever tension that had been brimming between you, unspoken words, or anything else was instantly gone. All of it exploded by his usual rigid posture and dead-eye stare that only moments ago made you believe that maybe, just maybe, your drunken mind wasn’t as delusional as you thought.
“When I come back you better be ready to get your ass kicked,” you seethed.
You went to turn on your booted heel when a strong wave rocked the ship and almost sent you toppling forward. You’d braced yourself for impact; your knees colliding once again with the wood or possible scraps to your hands and bare legs.
Instead, your back collided with a warm body with a forearm locked around your middle keeping you impossibly tight against them. The scent of sandalwood and skin melded together flooding your scenes until your brain was in overload.
You looked back and found his face mere inches from yours. So close you could feel the heat of his breath along your jaw tempting you to close those last few inches. For a brief moment you thought you’d unlocked some new form of drunken bravery inside of you, but all of it came crashing down when Zoro let go and stepped away.
“Maybe I should walk back with you. You don’t seem like you’re able to walk.”
“Okay.”
You didn’t know what else to say. Should you tell him to come close again? Should you tell him that while he was equally the most infuriating human on the planet you somehow couldn’t imagine a space where he wasn’t in it?
How could knowing someone for only a short while turn into…this.
You knew you wouldn’t say any of it. Not even enough liquor in the world could get you to tell Roronoa Zoro, The Demon, that you had a crush on him just as deadly as he was.
So, you turned on your heel and headed back towards the giant mouth of the fish. The steady sounds of Zoro’s heavy footsteps right behind you until you finally made it back into the bar. You’d only gotten a few steps to the table when you realized something was wrong. A man in a trench coat and large hat with a feather was standing in front of Nami and Usopp. They didn’t appear frightened but…why was he there?
“Oh, hey guys! This is my new best friend-“ Usopp stated.
Nami softly smacked him on his chest as she cut in, “This is not our friend.”
The man in question turned to stare at Zoro and you. His eyes sunflower yellow with swirls like a bullseye within making you almost take a step back from him. You bummed back into Zoro and this time when you looked at him he no longer looked unreadable. He was looking at this man like he was a godsend - a dream come true in the form of curled mustaches and oversized feathers.
“You’re Dracule Mihawk.”
“I have business with your captain. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll hand him over.”
“Well, we don’t know anyone named Luffy, do we guys? Zoro?”
You’d been so enamored by Mihawk’s appearance you hadn’t realized Zoro had moved around you. His eyes still fastened to him as he moved around to face him.
“I’ve been following your career since I was a child. It’s an honor to finally meet you, sir.”
“Thank you.”
Mihawk looked bored out of his skull.
“Which is why it pains me to inform you that tomorrow you’re going to die.”
“Wait, what?”
“What the actual fuck…”
Your words came out as an uttered whisper. You were too shell shocked to say more - do more. It felt like you were watching this whole interaction through the lense of a telescope on a distant island where idiots roamed free.
“I, Roronoa Zoro, challenge you to a duel to the death.”
“What the actual fuck! Zoro!”
This time you were loud. Much louder than you wanted with every syllable ringing out your panic like a dinner bell.
“I’ve never heard of you.”
“They call me the Demon Pirate Hunter. But my lifelong dream is to best you in single combat and become the greatest swordsman in the world.”
“You’re serious.”
“Accept my challenge and I’ll show you how serious I am.”
“Very well. Tomorrow at dawn and when I’m done with you Pirate Hunter I’ll take your captain.”
No. No. No - “No.”
Your head was still ringing out with the word. Unable to comprehend what in the actual hell had just happened. You’d come back to get your small cutting knife. He was supposed to be training you right now back on the deck of the Merry. This was wrong. All wrong.
Nami leaned forward from her seat. Her own worry was bleeding into her eyes, her voice, as she asked, “What in the hell did you just do?”
You were still trying to figure that out when Zoro turned and walked away leaving dread the size of a crater to worm its way inside your chest.
As always, thank you all so much for reading. Comments and reblogs are always appreciated.
Synopsis: After the defeat of Arlong the five of you promised yourselves and each other to achieve your dreams on your way to the Grand Line, helping Luffy search for the One Piece. It seems simple enough, except for the minor detail that you died. Coming back from the brink of death, Zoro and the others have noticed you haven’t been the same. You aren’t sure if it’s Death himself chasing or just Baroque Works after you but facing your inner demons won’t be the only fight you’ll have to worry about when family comes calling.
Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader
Genre: established relationship, idiots to lovers, angst, mentions of smut, (will add stuff later) it’s an adventure, y’all!
Words: 8.6+
A/N: Hello, my darlings! It is I! Your resident clown! S2 finally came!! Like the first season, CITB: Wanted will be following the S2 storyline, while having my original plan of giving a backstory for Doc. Hopefully, I can integrate it well, and it all comes together like fine wine and chains to give someone a good time. There is a Roronoa Zoro line I used from Mr. Oda himself, and it’s outlined in bold. This chapter is going to deal with mentions of PTSD, because who wouldn’t have a little, ya know? As always, thank you all for being so lovely and so sweet. For being one of the best fandoms I’ve had the privilege of being a part of. I love y’all. Ok. No more rambling. I hope you guys love this. Much Love, Jenn
p.s. shout out to @deadneverlander for always being my clown bestie and the bestest editor-in-chief
Warnings: mentions of ptsd and trauma (list could grow idk man)
Chaos In Their Bones Masterlist
Previous
The soft scratching of Nami’s pencil etching coordinates on the map above was just the sort of calm you needed. The sound of precise tapping gently resonated down to find you in the safety of your favorite spot on the ship.
The small alcove was perfectly placed between the stern castle deck Nami maintained and the end of the Merry, featuring Nami’s trees, allowing for the illusion of privacy you were after. Plus, it was the only space on the Merry that you could sit as close as possible to the water without the hefty weight of judgment - and worry - that buried between your shoulder blades from your crew.
You’d been hiding - no, no, wait. No, not hiding. Hiding felt like you did something wrong. Technically, you were regrouping yourself, which sounded much better in said favorite spot. The branches of Nami’s growing tangerine trees gave ample coverage from anyone’s line of sight, if they just so happened to want to look, but never obstructed yours from the endless reflected hues of sapphire and teal of the water below.
It wasn’t just the minute sound of the water lapping against the Merry that gave you peace. It was all the details around the ship. The maddening scratching of Nami’s pencil on paper and the scrubbing of her eraser held purpose. One that kept Nami centered; her curiosity about the next step of the journey kept her eyes on the horizon with whatever big adventure lay waiting for her to claim.
And the possibility of treasure didn’t hurt either.
It’s what turned her drawing and writing into something reminiscent of a madman. Her pencil beat, woodpecker sharp, against the small wooden table Luffy bought her.
“The perfect size for our navigator and her notes,” he’d declared, beaming pure sunshine that you could’ve sworn could cure the criminally grumpy. If he’d beamed any harder, waiting for his praise, he’d set the very sun alight.
It was this methodical, maddening, and sure writing you found comforting. The same way you found comfort listening to Sanji move around the kitchen, whisk scraping rhythmically against the sides of a mixing bowl, or blade slicing through ingredients. A comfort in Luffy and Usopp’s good-natured yapping, or the sound of weights threatening to burst through the boards of the ships as Zoro trained.
It was all these small, insignificant sounds that held the most significance to you. Each one reminded you of something important.
You were alive. You were home.
And your consciousness - or whatever lay cracking beneath your ribs - screamed for chaos like a dying man.
Every moment you were awake, it hummed its demands against bone. A sickening song that grew and grew until you felt the vibration hum the tune in your teeth; gluttonous to destroy. You heard it. Felt it claw at the sinews and nerves every time you denied it. The way it pounded so loudly against the cage of your skull it made your teeth ache.
Every day you woke up aboard a ship with a family you loved. Who loved you back. Who’d proven that love with the same intensity to protect you, as you did for them. A family built on hardcore trauma bonding, sure, but a fierce love gripped you. Every single one of you chose the other - saw the good and capabilities of one another - and decided to call each other a crew in the end.
So, why did you feel hollow and aching, as if something was missing?
No. Not missing. Taken. That word felt more accurate than most. Every day you woke up grateful and hollow, a strange combination.
You knew it wasn’t just Zoro who noticed the change in you. Everyone tiptoed around you, careful with their words and gestures. Luffy, in particular, was careful in not flinging his arms wide in excitement; no unexpected movements that might leave you flinching. At dinner, no one let their utensils clatter on the table or scrape on plates after the first night Usopp’s fork dropped on the table and sent your soul practically vacating your body.
You tried to make light of the moments your pain forced them to walk on eggshells. A joke that forced fake laughter or dismissed the cracks that only grew larger behind your eyes.
You’d spent so long pretending everything was fine that you weren’t sure if you believed it yourself anymore. You were pretty sure, like 99% sure, that you’d unsuccessfully convinced everyone else that you were fine. Good as new. Hence, the distance that grew between you and the growing looks of concern at your continued refusal to talk. The sleepless nights; nights you’d sleepwalk to any corner of the boat, hands braced to throw you over, with Zoro undoubtedly following behind to protect you.
Always keeping watch.
But you were fine. Perfectly normal.
You knew this morning when Zoro left your now shared room, he was tired of the verbal run around. The way you closed yourself off because the right words seemed to fail you to describe what it was that crawled inside.
How could you tell him - any of them - that it felt like you’d been given someone else’s skin. That any time your thoughts weren’t occupying your own head, something else did. Plagued it with…no. You wouldn’t think it - wouldn’t say it out loud - in case it made it more real.
No. You didn’t have anything you could share that would make the situation any better. The best thing to do? Continue pretending like everything was absolutely normal. Nothing to see here.
So, no, you were not hiding.
You were simply hanging out in your favorite spot that just happened to be conveniently hidden.
The port of Loguetown peaked over the horizon. A calling card that you were soon reaching your next destination, and that meant one glorious thing: land. No more would you have to worry about your breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinner thrown about your stomach like a merry-go-round.
You’d been on the Merry for months now, and still your stomach had you questioning whether it had truly been a wise decision with each new storm that rolled through the hull. Sanji told you that, eventually, it would get better. Easier. That your sea legs would come to you sooner than you think.
You were still waiting on the easier part.
The best thing about port meant a new town that featured new markets to explore for ingredients and plants to test out salves and brews. The last town you’d been able to stop at, much to Zoro’s ire, Sanji had gone with you to haunt the market stalls. The names of ingredients and plants you’d both been searching for were written down, while Sanji named off ingredients at your back like an excited child in a toy store.
“Do you know how hard this is to find?” Or your personal favorite, “You’re going to fall in love with me after tasting this with dinner tonight, Doc. Just you wait.” Earning him a death glare from Zoro, which only made Sanji’s devilish grin grow.
New taverns with new smells of foods also meant they were full of Zoro’s second favorite thing - booze. You still owed him a new case for losing your last sparring match. You really needed to stop accepting bets with him before you ran out of money. But maybe, just maybe, you could bribe him with a top-tier case of booze. One that might be so damn good, it was enough to make Zoro forget for just a few more days that he wanted to talk.
Your eyes scanned over the ocean's glittering surface, where the edges of the town came closer into view. The desire to place your feet on solid ground, to check the endless rows of possible market stalls and open shops with Nami. It was becoming a favorite pastime of yours to spend the day watching her haggle deals for items. She was truly a wordsmith and always seemed to walk away with what she wanted.
It also meant there was a very real possibility that a looming Zoro-shaped shadow wouldn’t be too far behind. Fingers pressed against your lower back, moving you gently like a breeze away from people, stores, or whatever he didn’t care for. Which seemed to always be a lot of things. Never a bar, though.
What you could personally look forward to was one of your favorite pastimes: locating pastry shops. The aroma of yeasted bread freshly risen in a tin, slathered in confectionery sugars or honey, filled with custards and topped with intricate designs of fruits was something you’d loved since you were a girl. Naan couldn’t always afford to give you those treats outside of special occasions, but you were old enough now to afford them yourself. And maybe you’d be able to enjoy them this time if Luffy and the boys didn’t get into their usual trouble.
No matter where you found yourselves, one of the boys seemed to locate trouble the way Luffy located meat. Which whittled down to being incredibly easy and far too often. You’d heard the argument earlier between Usopp and the rest of the crew: Loguetown was essentially the worst port any pirate vessel could pick. But between here and the Grand Line, it was the best viable option for supplies.
And possible death.
The thud of the weights reverberating down as an earthquake across the Merry’s hull brought you back to the present. Each release and lift was a silent threat that Zoro was dangerously close to splintering the ship in two.
You should’ve been focused on all the prospects a new town offered. Yet, here you were sitting in this particular spot, on this particular container, for the past two hours. A pear you’d snatched earlier that morning from the counter in Sanji’s kitchen, resting uneaten in your lap.
And, no, you were most definitely not pouting. Nope. No pouting or hiding here.
Your imagination was dangerously close to running away again when a ring-clad hand burst past your peripherals. A steaming cup of what smelled like coffee wiggling softly side-to-side in welcome. You didn’t have to look up to know the hand belonged to a handsomely flirtatious cook.
“I got worried when I didn’t see my favorite girl at breakfast this morning.”
You prayed he couldn’t physically hear your eyes roll as you took the coffee from his waiting hand.
“I thought Nami was your favorite girl?” You quipped, hiding your smirk against the mug's rim.
“It’s a revolving system,” he clarified warmly.
“Mhmm.”
“And, technically, you both have special reserved seating in my life.”
Playfully, you peeked over the rising steam from the cup. Your lips retracting from the rim for another sip, a mischievous question lingered on your tongue.
“So, Monsieur Vinsmoke,” you could practically see Sanji preening at your use of French. If you were able to tell him the ingredients inside a chouquette or find him what he asked for in his kitchen, the man combusted. “Who currently has the better reserved seating at the moment?”
You had to give it to him. When Sanji smiled, it was every ounce of the term ‘devilishly handsome’. Extra emphasis on the handsome.
“Currently, it would be you.”
“But only cause it’s simple ol’ me,” you quipped.
“Nah. I wouldn’t call you simple, Doc. You’re far from simple.”
“Careful, Sanji. If Zoro hears you, you’ll be dodging weights again.”
Your statement earned you a lethal combination of eye roll and scoff.
“Oh, please. You know, I’ll never quite understand what you see in that Moss Head. He isn’t even good with directions.”
God, was that statement painfully true. Zoro was infamous for being directionally impaired and yet…you hadn’t been ready for Sanji to voice it out loud.
The sharp huff that tinged his words in disbelief turned what could’ve been a hostile sentence into something that left your slurp of coffee ruthlessly sucked into your nose. Your would-be laughter dies in a painfully heated cough and watery eyes. Your fingers were pinching the bridge of your nose to try and quell the burning sensation, while you wondered, quite seriously, if it was possible to melt your nose from the inside out.
Sanji’s hand came to gently pat your back and continued to do so until you gestured that you were okay. You were, in fact, not dying from inhaled coffee consumption today.
“You alright?”
“Are you asking because I inhaled liquid coffee beans or just in general?”
“I would say it’s because you just inhaled half of my special French brew through your nose,” Sanji quipped, “because I feel like if I answer with, ‘in general’, you’re going to give me the silent treatment.”
If you were braver, you would’ve glanced back at Sanji. You would’ve greeted the warmth of his ocean blues with your own and fought the good fight for your eyes to finish telling the lie. The ability to shit-talk your way out of any situation was a trait you picked up from holding a lifelong friendship membership with Usopp and all of his…shenanigans.
Teasing Sanji should’ve come easy for you, especially whenever you used a certain green-haired archnemesis in playful comparisons. Instead, you felt the cracks begin to spread at the edges of your smile. The sounds of a humming hymn pounding in your veins and the caw of a raven you were beginning to swear relentlessly followed you, coming from overhead.
You weren’t sure when you started noticing their presence - these two ravens. Whether they were a figment of your imagination or real, their presence left an ominous foreboding deep in your chest.
It was just birds. Very large birds.
It’s been weeks since the first time you’d noticed the pair of them at the last village. The two of them hopped on the awning above a stall of dry herbs and tonics. Their cawing increased with each hop that led them closer to where you’d stood beside Zoro.
One of the large ravens appeared again a couple of nights later. This time outside your window. The gloss of its feathers blended oil thick between the midnight hues of night and ocean. It’d almost been impossible to see until it drew closer to your cabin window; the body perched seamlessly at the edge. The sensible part of your brain warned you that something was off with the raven. Your body reacted to the warning signal with a hand reaching out to wake Zoro, but at the very last minute, you froze at the sound. It sounded less like its usual caw. It was shadowed in something that sounded strikingly familiar to a word.
A sharp caw drew you from your thoughts and back to the present. Your gaze located the raven and watched it disappear behind a cloud. The warmth of Sanji’s presence beside you reminds you quickly that he was still there, still watching, and waiting for you to respond.
But your imagination ran wild with endless possibilities that their constant presence felt more than a simple coincidence. Your anxiety took hold with violent shapes and what-ifs, transforming small things into something larger, more triggering, to send your heart shattering to pieces with each rapid beat against your chest.
How long would it take for the smallest sound of scraping utensils against plates or the steel glint of knives to not make you flinch? The sight of fishmen, working diligently at markets, causes your vision to spot in black and white fireworks behind retinas with a hand digging into your sternum. The panic radiated into a pain that made it nearly impossible to breathe.
Finally, your gaze dropped to the warm mug of coffee he’d brought you. Your hands brought it to your lips to take a sip before you asked, “Did he send you?”
You didn’t need to glance over at Sanji to know his face contorted with a raised brow in disbelief that that specific question had ever left your mouth. It was still funny to see all the same.
"You're right. Dumb question."
You watched as he rubbed his palms gently down the length of his slacks. As if he was trying to completely rub the idea away that he would do anything friendly for the Moss Head.
"He's just worried about you, ya know. We all are."
Worry flashed like lightning in the blue of his eyes; quick and sudden as a storm. It was what you’d been struggling to avoid, and now, you couldn’t deny that his worry was real, that it carried weight, just like everyone else’s.
"I wish you would all stop worrying about me."
"Fat chance at that, Doc,” he replied, his shoulder gently nudging yours. An intrusive grunt of Zoro lifting his weights, allowing them to thunder back down on the hull, cut through the would-be tender moment, leaving Sanji fighting off a shiver of disgust. "This is probably the most uncomfortable spot you could've picked on this ship.”
“I would say uncomfortable for you maybe, but-,” you drew out the U in the word and ended it with an abrupt T when you nudged his shoulder. “-if you wanted to be really uncomfortable, it would be in our bedroom.”
“I could’ve gone a million lifetimes without ever hearing you say that to me. If I need therapy, Doc, I’m bringing you the bill.”
Laughter flooded in your chest and erupted, abrupt and harsh, at the horror that etched itself along Sanji’s features.
It must have been the sound of laughter that drew Zoro over to your position. You’d been relatively quiet, pensive, and lost in the trenches of your own thoughts. The sudden change was enough to spark his curiosity about what could have possibly lightened your mood. When his eyes landed on your spot, you now shared with Sanji, you watched the curiosity bleed into something dark. His jaw ticked as his teeth clenched together.
Zoro’s jealousy never stemmed from the superficial. It was housed in a deep-seated feeling that no matter how much of himself he gave - how much he tried - it would never be enough. It was there whenever Luffy found excitement with towns and their people or handed out compliments to his crew (particularly Sanji), and it was there now as he watched you brighten up for the first time in days besides your favorite cook.
Zoro stood before you (technically, he was standing over you, looking down at you over the railing), the extent of his earlier workout evident by the perspiration that soaked through strands of hair with droplets that ran down his chest and shoulders. His sun-kissed skin was haloed by the sun, and for one heartbreaking moment, you couldn’t fathom how he didn’t realize the hold he held on you.
Zoro was complicated. Unapologetically calloused with a veneer of humor dryer than sandpaper. He was stoic. Harsh. Moody. Endearingly helpful. Directionally impaired. Zoro was everything you imagined a man hellbent on becoming the greatest would be. But with you, he allowed himself to be something he usually never was.
Soft.
You knew the way his body leaned closer at your touch. The way his nose nestled into the crease of your neck as you slept or how his fingertips traveled the expanse of your body as if committing every part of you - all the scars and flaws you feared ruined you, turned you into someone you couldn’t recognize - to memory. He brightened when you shared new recipe ideas or medical facts, not just because he was interested in listening, but because it was you. He brightened because you believed in him, to know he was smart enough to be a part of the excitement and taught him when he was just a little lost.
You were both a little more broken than when you first met, although neither of you would be willing to admit it. Zoro took his moment of failure and molded the experience to be a part of his greatness. You? You were too chicken shit to ever tell him that you died and came back a little less whole; a little more wrong. Zoro, in his own way, was unable to admit that the cracks Kuina left fractured wider as he ran back to the village with you dying in his arms.
All this accumulated to communication not being either of your strong points, which was why when Zoro tilted his head for you to make your way over to him, you were equal parts annoyed and distracted. Painfully distracted.
It hardly seemed fair that seeing Zoro shirtless always left you flustered. You’d think after sharing a room the last few months with the man, you would be immune to the muscles, but you weren’t. If anything, it’d only gotten worse since Zoro had recently begun to work out more frequently with longer sessions and heavier weights, resulting in him getting…bigger.
You felt your body swing off its spot on the container, and while you passed by Sanji, your hand gently tapped his knee in thanks. You watched with amusement as Zoro’s eyes tracked the movement. A question pressed against his teeth, barely contained, until you were almost in front of him.
“What’s with the waiter?”
“I thought you’d sent him to come talk to me.”
As your reply registered in his brain, you watched as Zoro’s body grew still. A tick in his jaw was the only indication you had of his annoyance. His eyes flicked over your shoulder to where you’d left Sanji.
“Yeah. I wouldn’t do that.”
“Funny. He said the same thing,” you quipped, unable to keep the smile from spreading across your lips. “How was the workout?”
“It was fine. We’re going to be coming into Loguetown soon. Figured I’d come get you so we can get ready.”
The first time Zoro started this now infamous tradition between the two of you, it’d been at the first stop after the Conomi Islands. It was an unspoken anxiety. One you knew Zoro would vehemently deny if anyone ever brought it up.
It was the same anxiety that kept him glued to you the minute you stepped off the Merry. Anywhere that wasn’t the ship; anywhere that wasn’t the safety of your shared room or his body. It was why he’d spent the last months tirelessly training you in combat. You knew it was partially meant to make you feel strong - some semblance of control - but there was no denying that for Zoro, it chipped away at the ice-cold fear that lingered under the surface of having to let you go.
This system he came up with was a meticulous set of steps the two of you followed to the very letter. One that allowed him to tamp down the restlessness that threatened to swallow him whole. The uneasiness of the possibility that he’d let you go with the unknowns, and what could possibly happen if he didn't find out until Nami told him. Because if you weren’t with him, Zoro would bet a million berries the two of you would be off getting into some sort of trouble.
So, when he turned to head back towards your room, he didn’t have to take your hand to tug you along or listen to you grumble about being your own person.
Zoro needed this. And it was something simple for you to give.
So you quietly followed behind him down the hallway to your room. Your shoulder purposely grazed across his bare chest while you moved past him at the door. You were trying to rile him up. Just enough to ease the tension his thoughts were causing in his shoulders. You sat patiently on the bed and watched him pull out the thigh harness Zoro had crafted at the last town. It fit snug across your hips and thigh, but he’d made sure - in his thoughtful design - the placement of your nunchucks holster wouldn’t impede on the pockets of your cargo pants.
Zoro knew how much you loved the multipurpose utility options of your pockets.
Without thinking, you reached out to take the harness from him. The action earned you a raised brow in question and a defensive pull to keep it out of arm's reach.
“What do you think you’re doing?”
“We’re almost to port, and you need a shower,” you replied, your tone flat and pointing out the obvious.
“And you figured this was a good reason to do your own harness?”
“I’m not five, Zoro,” you chided. More softly, you reminded him, “Plus, you’re all…sweaty.”
You were close to adding that you didn’t mind. His damp hair softened the sharpness of his jaw and the high rise of his cheeks. The freckles the sun kissed across them only aided in making the pout of his lips a mixture of sinful and boyish. It was his body, however, that made your throat feel like you’d tried swallowing past sand.
The hard work Zoro put in over the last few months was showcased by the width of his shoulders. His biceps were wide, and when crossed over his chest, the muscles flexed together in a war of who would be the largest. His forearms taut and laced with veins that stole your attention with each movement - even when he was simply pointing at Sanji’s chest. The scar from his encounter with Mihawke lightened itself down enough to where, if you weren’t looking for it, you’d almost not know it was there.
You knew it was there. You’d traced it enough times at night to be able to find it even in the dark.
The smirk that quirked Zoro’s lips should’ve been the first warning you were in trouble. Your brain registers too late the playful way his eyes darkened as he closed the remaining space between you. Deft hands that knew every inch of your body effortlessly moved the harness around your waist - pulling the leather tight and latching it into place. All with the heat of his gaze boring down on you with a salacious smirk that sent your heart pounding.
“You never complained before about me being so sweaty,” he teased, his voice caressing down your spine, smooth as velvet.
His words were a match that ignited a flush, warm and troublesome, along your skin. You were tempted to try and break eye contact, but by the way his smirk threatened to bloom into a full-blown smile, there would be no reason to attempt it. So, you went with option two and swatted him playfully on the shoulder.
The miniature attack broke Zoro’s face into sunshine with a smile. The warmth of his laughter filled your room, causing your own smile to spread across your lips against your will.
“That’s not playing fair.”
He dropped down to one knee. A skilled hand tapping his waiting thigh in silent instruction to place your foot where he’d asked. You made sure to drop it down with just a little extra attitude.
The mirth in Zoro’s eyes kept them bright - playful - and yet, the earlier desire left his pupils blown wide as he stared up at you. His eyes were solely focused on your face, watching as his hands traveled painstakingly slow up your leg. His fingers ghosted over your inner thigh as he tightened the strap into place.
“I never said I’d play a fair game when it comes to you, Snowdrop.” His gaze took you in from his place at your feet. His fingers danced dangerously between teasing and focused; intent mixed between preparing you when you docked and having you come undone at his hands. “Are you ever going to tell me what’s been going on these past couple of weeks?”
Zoro’s tone wasn’t angry. The question was delicate and whisper soft, like having to ask drew his worry out of the grave he’d tried to bury it in. You hated that for any ounce of a second, Zoro’s worry stole the joy from his chest.
He thought it was recent - your sleepless nights and sleepwalking. Only a few days here and there of staring blankly and dissociating into a space you couldn’t name, which accumulated to a couple of weeks. In reality, you’d become a master of covering up these parts of you that you didn’t want anyone else to see, since you’d opened your eyes back in that hut.
The thought collided unspoken behind your teeth. The words sour and forced your lips to purse into a look Zoro knew well. In real time, you watched his brightness dim down in ounces. His attention was back on securing the last notch of the harness into place before placing your foot back on the floor before he moved to stand.
“Zoro-“
His name held so much. An apology was the main one he was tired of hearing.
“I’m trying to be patient here.” His words cut you off, stopping whatever weak attempt at avoidance you might try this time. “You know it’s not the easiest for me.”
“Oh, I don’t know,” you hummed. “You do a lot better than you think.”
It was meant to be a comfort. An honest statement that his presence alone did more for you than anything else ever could.
“If that were true, you would feel safer telling me what it is that’s haunting you, Snowdrop. You’d confide in me more. Trust that I only want to help you, not because it benefits me. I want you to stop letting your demons steal the life you have while you’re able to live it.”
His hand reached up to cup your cheek in his palm. A thumb traces the bottom of your lip before dipping down to your chin to caress underneath. If someone walked in the room, you knew they would just see the two of you, eyes locked on the other and sharing the same breath, waiting for the other to breathe.
He didn’t need to tell you he only wanted the best for you. While he was overprotective at times, it never came from a place of malice or ownership. His jealousy comes from a place of fear that he might not be good enough; that you could find better. There could never be anyone who loved you, cared for you, as fiercely as Zoro did. The heart of gold that protected his captain, his crew (yes, even the waiter), because that was the kind of man he was.
Staring into his eyes now, you hoped your own could convey on some level how much you appreciated him. Which is what made trying to explain that you felt like you were going crazy, that you believed something came back with you, riding under your skin, felt like trying to speak while being dragged deeper into quicksand.
“I don’t know…I don’t-“ you closed your eyes to try and break away from his gaze. Your mind focused on the thundering of your heart and the warmth his hand left behind after he’d removed it from your face. “I don’t know how to explain what’s going on. I can’t make sense of it, Zoro. All I know is I don’t feel like me anymore - like something crawled inside and is rearranging everything about me.”
You braced yourself to open your eyes; to maybe see in real time his perception of you change, expecting to see the beginning of what you feared. The first hint that someone agreed that you came back unholy.
The only thing you found waiting for you wasn’t fear, uncertainty, or anger. Zoro looked at you like you were his purpose - his entire center - and the reason the heavens painted the sunset the way they did. The reassurance of his presence was enough to send a gasp of air to lodge itself inside your chest. A weak attempt to fight back the tears that threatened to drown you.
“Only those who have suffered long can see the light within the shadows.” Without hesitation, Zoro pulled you close to his chest and wrapped his arms around you. His cheek pressed against your hair as he spoke. “You died, Doc. Something like that is going to change you, but only you get to decide how it’s going to shape you.”
Zoro’s words resonated along your skin. Each syllable sinks down into the marrow of your bones to take root. You wanted to ask if it was possible that hope, replacing the fearmongering of your own death, could grow in its place. Standing there wrapped in the warmth of Zoro’s arms, his body real, warm, and present, was enough to make you begin to believe it could.
A quick succession of pounding erupted on the door and sent you jumping against him, which earned a deep chuckle that Zoro pressed against the curve of your throat.
“It’s just Luffy.”
“How do you know?”
Your question was answered as Luffy called behind the door, “We’re getting ready to dock, guys! Meet on the deck in fifteen!”
You pulled back just enough from Zoro’s chest to be greeted by a smirk that said, “Told you so.” You pushed out an exaggerated huff to accompany an eye roll as you disentangled yourself from him. You became immediately aware that you were now lightly covered in dried Zoro sweat.
“Oh, great. Now I bet I stink,” you mumbled, lifting your tank top to your nose for added measure.
“I might be biased, but I think you smell great.”
If you rolled your eyes any harder, you were sure you’d lose brain cells.
“You think a brewery smells like a candy store. I’m taking that comment with the tiniest, thinnest possible grain of salt.”
“If it bothers you that much, you could come with me to shower.”
Damn him. Already, the need to do just that hit you something sharp and coiling achingly low.
“Luffy said to be on the dock in fifteen minutes,” you said to remind yourself more than him. “If we take too long, they’ll know we were…uhm…occupied.”
You were starting to think Zoro’s favorite pastime really was seeing just how many shades of red he could make you. A shit-eating grin erupted across his face, and you knew whatever he was about to say was going to send whatever shade you currently were to your ears.
“Snowdrop, by now, the whole crew knows what we get up to. Especially the waiter.”
For added unnecessary emphasis, Zoro made sure to throw his thumb over his shoulder, indicating the wall behind him. The wall that directly resided next to Sanji’s room.
“Oh my god, okay!” You practically shrieked. Your hand shot out to grab the steel of your nunchucks before sliding them home in their holster. Your fingers were clasping the strap over them as you continued, “I am leaving now. Yeah. I’m going to the deck. I’ll brave the pastry shops smelling musky.”
Without waiting for a response, you opened your bedroom door and stepped back out into the hall. Your feet carry you towards the stairs that lead to the deck where Luffy, Nami, Sanji, and Usopp would be waiting. The sounds of their boisterous chatter were enough to speed up your movements so you could be wrapped in the warmth of conversation.
They all greeted you with smiles, and Usopp with a brotherly embrace. One that the two of you have followed up with your secret handshake since childhood. It was one of the many things that joined your made-up hand signals, and bird calls that drove the entire crew nuts when you each took turns riding up in the crow’s nest.
You allowed yourself to be swallowed up in the laughter and squabbling - mainly taking place because Usopp still didn’t agree that stopping in Loguetown for any reason was a good reason. The way Nami motioned with head nods and wide eyes to step in with an agreement that a girl's day of shopping was indeed a reasonable reason. Beyond reasonable, actually.
This familiar back and forth made it easy to be present: the first step in taking Zoro’s advice. The shadows may be a part of you, but only you get to decide how they claim you. It was easier said than done, and yet looking at the faces of your crew - your family - you were willing to start moving forward.
Whatever that entailed, and yet the soft voice in the back of your mind sparked to life. Nothing vivid and disarming; its usual words harsh and violent like a lashing to open skin. It was methodical, hushed. The delicate toxicity of its words moves fluidly like inky black smoke, leaving a residue over the hope you dare thought you could have.
“They’re blind to the very wolf that lives among them.”
Violently, you shook your head to dislodge the thought before it left you dissociating into a vivid what if. Maybe in Loguetown there might be a shop or a stall that sells lovely tea or crystals or something to make whatever this part of you was chill. the. fuck. out.
Zoro came sauntering in freshly cleaned, with his chest practically threatening to bust through the seams of his Gi-style shirt. You waited until he situated himself beside you, forearm resting against the railing as his eyes took in the current argumentative debate Usopp and Sanji were having about personal space in the kitchen.
“We should look into updating your wardrobe while we’re there,” you whispered into his ear.
You couldn’t explain the sheer amount of joy you got at seeing Zoro’s skin flush with goosebumps and heat. His gaze moved to take you in, so close beside him he’d simply have to lean down, and your lips would connect. By the shift in his eyes, you could tell Zoro was thinking about doing just that.
“What’s wrong with the clothes I have on?”
“It’s tight.”
“It’s comfortable.”
“The fabric looks like it’s screaming for help.”
Zoro closed in what limited space had already been between you - close enough that when he smirked, the rise of his lip grazed over yours. There was no fighting off the shiver of anticipation that rolled through you - a part of you wishing you had when the smirk grew higher.
“If you want me to take it off, Snowdrop, all you had to do was ask.”
“Oh my god!” Nami’s annoyance separated you cleanly from one another by a few inches. You were still tucked into the crook of Zoro’s side when you looked her way. “Am I going to have to separate you two already?”
“I call Doc when you do,” Sanji cut in.
“Fat chance of that happening,” Zoro bristled.
His mild threat only made Sanji’s Cheshire Cat grin spread like wildfire across his face. If there was one thing Sanji loved more than cooking in his kitchen, it was living to ruffle Zoro’s metaphorical feathers as often as humanly possible.
You wondered if it was payback for being stuck next to the thin walls of your room. You could practically feel the heat creeping up your neck to burn blazing hot across your cheeks.
“While it would be truly riveting to watch you two idiots go back and forth,” Nami cut back in, “We really should get moving. We don’t want to stay in Loguetown too long and gain unwanted attention.”
“And to see where Gold Rodger died,” Luffy added.
“Yes,” Nami deadpanned. “Can’t forget that.”
“What are we waiting for? Let’s go!”
“I just want to remind everyone that I did not, and still don’t, think this is a good idea,” Usopp interjected.
His hands were already worrying at the strap of his bag. You pushed off the railing and went to him. Your arm slides around his shoulders, using the crook of your elbow to pull him in closer. Using the small grip you had on him, you used it to get him to move forward to follow Luffy off the deck and down the ramp to shore.
“It’s been duly noted, Usopp,” you said. “Now, how about we just try and enjoy our possible last chance being on land.”
Eyes wide with terror greeted you seconds after the last word left your mouth. The whites of his eyes became more exposed with each step you took down to the cobbled road in front of you.
“Why do you gotta say it like that, Doc?” He questioned. Each word dripping with anxiety, you could practically feel on your skin. “This really could be our last time doing anything! Any-thing!”
“Usopp. You know I love you. You seriously need to relax.”
“How can you ask me to relax when we are walking into death? Death, Doc?!”
You gave him one last tight hug before you released him. Your body gave a brief shrug in response that somehow made his eyes widen impossibly bigger.
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It means, Usopp, that maybe a little possibility of death is worth some fun, and we need the supplies, and that is one universal fact you can’t dispute with. Plus, the only one who had any run-in with death is me, and look how fine I am.”
“Not funny,” Zoro grumbled from behind you while Usopp said, “You are most definitely the farthest person from okay on this ship. I’m pretty sure you’re almost certifiable.”
“Wow, okay. Rude.”
You fell into step behind Luffy, who fearlessly moved through the crowds of people. His eyes filled with childlike merriment as they hungrily took in the scenery around him, and what a scenery it was to behold.
You’d never seen a city quite like Loguetown. Everything was industrial; a majority of shops appeared to be inside actual buildings, with only a few random small stalls of merchants placed at random outside. There were cars and trolleys, which were something you’d only seen in magazines Kaya received at the manor. Syrup village never had use for trolleys or giant, elegant cement buildings that towered over the horizon. Each one housed sweet shops, finery of jewels with fabrics that ranged from silks to wool, meats, and ceilings full of lights and pops of color from hanging umbrellas.
Loguetown made you feel every bit the small village girl as you stepped through the archway and into the main square.
You weren’t so enamored with everything around you that it made you oblivious to the heat of Zoro at your back. The way his finger grazed the waist of your pants to remind you that he was there or moving too far ahead of him.
The last couple of places Luffy had the Merry stop at for supplies were nothing compared to Loguetown. Besides the abundance of Marines you were already seeing, the number of people in general was beyond what you were all used to.
Zoro’s anxiety must have been going into overdrive.
“There are so many people,” Usopp mentioned in awe.
He was equally as stunned as you were at the sheer size of Loguetown. You wanted to ask him if he was thinking about Syrup village, too. All the differences Loguetown had in the first five seconds of entry compared to the island you’d both grown up on.
Your group walked to the column that stood in the center of the entrance. Nami read off the plaque's engraving of “The town of the beginning and the end.”
“Well, that sounds ominous,” you grumbled.
You refused to let some weird engraved words ruin this moment for you. There were so many new things for you to see, and you were in charge of getting first aid supplies. A spark of excitement at all the potential a place like this had in introducing you to new medicines - new herbs - was palpable.
They were lucky Zoro had his index hooked in the hoop of your pants, or you might have taken off on your own.
“This is where it all started. The hunt for the One Piece. History happened here!”
God, why didn’t you expect Luffy to start yelling like an excited lunatic? Your captain was so radioactive in his excitement, his body vibrated with it. It still didn’t mean yelling like a crazy person, arms thrown wide to grab hold of the universe in a thank you hug, made garnering any extra attention less sketchy.
Every single one of you took turns glancing in every direction just to make sure no one was looking at you all a little too long.
“It looks like they’re having some kind of festival,” Sanji pointed out.
“Ooo, do you think they’ll have a parade?” You asked him excitedly.
Sanji would be willing to feed into your excitement, while Zoro, being ever the pragmatist, quickly piped up with, “For Gold Rodger’s execution.”
“You just have to suck the fun out of a good time, don’t cha?”
You loved this man. You really did, but sometimes…
“What?” He responded. The crease between his forehead perfectly matched the question in his eyes. “It says it right there on the banners.”
“I saw that.”
“Then why ask for a parade?”
“Zoro, darling, if you have to ask, it does not matter anymore.”
“A festival’s not so good for laying low,” Usopp pointed out.
The town, the sights, and the setting were overwhelming. So overwhelming that you hadn’t noticed Luffy had started wandering off until you watched Sanji give chase. He easily caught up with him and turned him back around towards the group.
“Then we’ll just have to be smart. No attracting unnecessary attention.”
The minute Luffy stepped back into the circle, he did so with his arm raised, as if someone would call on him to ask his vote.
“I want to see the execution platform!”
“Morbid.”
“What, no.” Luffy’s smile halted for the smallest millisecond before it resumed its usual place. “It’s where everything began, Doc. The story of the One Piece.”
“I caught that.”
“Sanji,” Nami cut in. “What if you take Luffy with you for some food shopping?”
“Mmmm,” Sanji hummed in approval.
Everyone understood the unspoken assignment.
“Food first, then execution platform!”
Nami was already digging into the depths of her purse. Her hands scrapping up the berry she had sectioned off with the purpose for each amount jotted down in her head. You wouldn’t be surprised if she knew how much berry was in each individual stack just from the feel alone.
“Right. Food will keep him out of trouble.”
“I am headed to the fashion district. Zoro, you need new swords, right?”
Zoro had stopped paying attention after Luffy brought up the execution platform. Nami saying his name brought him back into the conversation, but not before a hint of unease sent his eyes shifting between Loguetown and your group.
“I need money too.”
“Okay, what do you want me to do about it? Why don’t you ask Doc for money? She is your girlfriend.”
“Hey, wait a minute,” you butt in, voice taking full offense. “This money is for first aid supplies, remember? This isn’t “cover -for- a -sword,” money.”
“The cook got money?” He interjected, looking between Nami and Sanji.
“I’m buying food for all of us.”
“Me having more swords is for all of us,” Zoro shot back.
The annoyance rippled off him in waves as he stared over at Sanji. Sanji, on the other hand, looked completely undisturbed. At least he made a step up from waiter to cook, so that felt like a positive.
Nami’s own flash of irritation came as her hand dipped back inside her bag. A wad of berry, noticeably smaller than Sanji’s, was held in her hand. Zoro stepped forward, his hand already reaching to take it when Nami pulled it back at the last second.
“You take this, you pay me back. With 300% interest.”
“Can take the con artist out of the East Blue, but you can’t take the con artist out of the girl.”
“Hey, if you have a problem with it you can give him some of your berry,” Nami replied.
“Shutting up.”
“What if I need more?”
“You haggle?” Nami replied. She seemed genuinely confused. As if she forgot she was dealing with Roronoa Zoro, pirate hunter extraordinaire, but completely clueless about most basic life skills. “There’s a price they want and a price they will take.”
With the short lesson ended, Nami handed over the money to Zoro, who looked to still be processing what she’d told him. He glanced over at you and immediately stood taller. His fingers pushed the berry inside the pocket of his pants.
“Haggle. Fine.”
Usopp quickly added that he was going to be staying with Nami, using the excuse that a big city and a lone woman were a bad combination. You were tempted to remind Usopp that Nami was perfectly capable of getting into life-threatening situations like the rest of the Straw Hats, but decided against it. Why ruin it for the guy?
It was decided that once everyone got what they needed, you’d all meet back up here. You were just beginning to head down what you assumed would lead to medicinal shops when a familiar hand clasped around your wrist, stopping you short.
“Where are you going?”
The question wasn’t a demand. It was genuinely curious where you were going if he wasn’t about to follow.
“To get my portion of the supplies. Why?”
“I just thought-I thought you were going with me to look for swords.”
“Isn’t it said that a sword chooses its owner? You don’t need me for that.”
“But what if I want you there?”
The grip he’d held on your wrist transformed as he released it. His fingers trailed down the soft skin of your wrist until they came to the palm of your hand. Not grabbing or trying to hold, but softly suspended there. That way if you wanted to reach for him, as you usually did, you could.
You looked at this man who so blatantly adored you and couldn’t find it in you to feel anything else but gratitude for him. A man who only wanted to be your protector in more ways than one.
“Zoro, I’ll be okay.” You tried to keep your voice as soothing as possible and hoped it was working. “When I finish up getting my supplies, I promise I’ll come and find you.”
“How will you know where I’ll be?”
“There can’t be that many swordsmiths in Loguetown,” you pointed out.
“Good point.” The smile was small. It barely raised the corners of his mouth while he diverted his eyes from you to your hands that were still intertwined, but not. When Zoro finally looked back at you, he asked, “Come back to me?”
Four simple words, and yet, they held the sharpest meaning. You weren’t sure when it became the thing he’d say to you whenever there was a reason for the two of you to be a part. It wasn’t just four words. It was one of the last things you heard from him while he clutched you, iron tight to his chest as he ran with you back to Coco Village. A reminder of time wasted, and the lifetime you both promised to spend making up for it.
“Always.”
“I think I’m going to be sick,” Sanji grumbled.
“Shut up, Cook.”
You took that moment to move up on tiptoe and place a soft kiss against Zoro’s cheek just as you disconnected your hand from his. You all had things you needed to do before the day was over, and you didn’t want to waste the majority of your time not enjoying it.
So, the six of you went your separate ways with your promise to meet back in the center. It felt doable. It felt like today was going to be a good, normal, trouble-free day, because really, how much trouble could you all possibly get into?
Tag list: @tombraiderjones2505 @bbning @lyladoesart
As always, thank you for reading. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.
THE QUEEN OF LONG OPLA FICS HAS ARRIVED AND SHE'S STRIKING AGAINNNNN 😫✨ muahahahhahahahahahah I'm so happy oh my God, I haven't even read the chapter yet
Synopsis: After the defeat of Arlong the five of you promised yourselves and each other to achieve your dreams on your way to the Grand Line, helping Luffy search for the One Piece. It seems simple enough, except for the minor detail that you died. Coming back from the brink of death, Zoro and the others have noticed you haven’t been the same. You aren’t sure if it’s Death himself chasing or just Baroque Works after you but facing your inner demons won’t be the only fight you’ll have to worry about when family comes calling.
Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader
Genre: established relationship, idiots to lovers, angst, mentions of smut, (will add stuff later) it’s an adventure, y’all!
Words: 8.6+
A/N: Hello, my darlings! It is I! Your resident clown! S2 finally came!! Like the first season, CITB: Wanted will be following the S2 storyline, while having my original plan of giving a backstory for Doc. Hopefully, I can integrate it well, and it all comes together like fine wine and chains to give someone a good time. There is a Roronoa Zoro line I used from Mr. Oda himself, and it’s outlined in bold. This chapter is going to deal with mentions of PTSD, because who wouldn’t have a little, ya know? As always, thank you all for being so lovely and so sweet. For being one of the best fandoms I’ve had the privilege of being a part of. I love y’all. Ok. No more rambling. I hope you guys love this. Much Love, Jenn
p.s. shout out to @deadneverlander for always being my clown bestie and the bestest editor-in-chief
Warnings: mentions of ptsd and trauma (list could grow idk man)
Chaos In Their Bones Masterlist
Previous
The soft scratching of Nami’s pencil etching coordinates on the map above was just the sort of calm you needed. The sound of precise tapping gently resonated down to find you in the safety of your favorite spot on the ship.
The small alcove was perfectly placed between the stern castle deck Nami maintained and the end of the Merry, featuring Nami’s trees, allowing for the illusion of privacy you were after. Plus, it was the only space on the Merry that you could sit as close as possible to the water without the hefty weight of judgment - and worry - that buried between your shoulder blades from your crew.
You’d been hiding - no, no, wait. No, not hiding. Hiding felt like you did something wrong. Technically, you were regrouping yourself, which sounded much better in said favorite spot. The branches of Nami’s growing tangerine trees gave ample coverage from anyone’s line of sight, if they just so happened to want to look, but never obstructed yours from the endless reflected hues of sapphire and teal of the water below.
It wasn’t just the minute sound of the water lapping against the Merry that gave you peace. It was all the details around the ship. The maddening scratching of Nami’s pencil on paper and the scrubbing of her eraser held purpose. One that kept Nami centered; her curiosity about the next step of the journey kept her eyes on the horizon with whatever big adventure lay waiting for her to claim.
And the possibility of treasure didn’t hurt either.
It’s what turned her drawing and writing into something reminiscent of a madman. Her pencil beat, woodpecker sharp, against the small wooden table Luffy bought her.
“The perfect size for our navigator and her notes,” he’d declared, beaming pure sunshine that you could’ve sworn could cure the criminally grumpy. If he’d beamed any harder, waiting for his praise, he’d set the very sun alight.
It was this methodical, maddening, and sure writing you found comforting. The same way you found comfort listening to Sanji move around the kitchen, whisk scraping rhythmically against the sides of a mixing bowl, or blade slicing through ingredients. A comfort in Luffy and Usopp’s good-natured yapping, or the sound of weights threatening to burst through the boards of the ships as Zoro trained.
It was all these small, insignificant sounds that held the most significance to you. Each one reminded you of something important.
You were alive. You were home.
And your consciousness - or whatever lay cracking beneath your ribs - screamed for chaos like a dying man.
Every moment you were awake, it hummed its demands against bone. A sickening song that grew and grew until you felt the vibration hum the tune in your teeth; gluttonous to destroy. You heard it. Felt it claw at the sinews and nerves every time you denied it. The way it pounded so loudly against the cage of your skull it made your teeth ache.
Every day you woke up aboard a ship with a family you loved. Who loved you back. Who’d proven that love with the same intensity to protect you, as you did for them. A family built on hardcore trauma bonding, sure, but a fierce love gripped you. Every single one of you chose the other - saw the good and capabilities of one another - and decided to call each other a crew in the end.
So, why did you feel hollow and aching, as if something was missing?
No. Not missing. Taken. That word felt more accurate than most. Every day you woke up grateful and hollow, a strange combination.
You knew it wasn’t just Zoro who noticed the change in you. Everyone tiptoed around you, careful with their words and gestures. Luffy, in particular, was careful in not flinging his arms wide in excitement; no unexpected movements that might leave you flinching. At dinner, no one let their utensils clatter on the table or scrape on plates after the first night Usopp’s fork dropped on the table and sent your soul practically vacating your body.
You tried to make light of the moments your pain forced them to walk on eggshells. A joke that forced fake laughter or dismissed the cracks that only grew larger behind your eyes.
You’d spent so long pretending everything was fine that you weren’t sure if you believed it yourself anymore. You were pretty sure, like 99% sure, that you’d unsuccessfully convinced everyone else that you were fine. Good as new. Hence, the distance that grew between you and the growing looks of concern at your continued refusal to talk. The sleepless nights; nights you’d sleepwalk to any corner of the boat, hands braced to throw you over, with Zoro undoubtedly following behind to protect you.
Always keeping watch.
But you were fine. Perfectly normal.
You knew this morning when Zoro left your now shared room, he was tired of the verbal run around. The way you closed yourself off because the right words seemed to fail you to describe what it was that crawled inside.
How could you tell him - any of them - that it felt like you’d been given someone else’s skin. That any time your thoughts weren’t occupying your own head, something else did. Plagued it with…no. You wouldn’t think it - wouldn’t say it out loud - in case it made it more real.
No. You didn’t have anything you could share that would make the situation any better. The best thing to do? Continue pretending like everything was absolutely normal. Nothing to see here.
So, no, you were not hiding.
You were simply hanging out in your favorite spot that just happened to be conveniently hidden.
The port of Loguetown peaked over the horizon. A calling card that you were soon reaching your next destination, and that meant one glorious thing: land. No more would you have to worry about your breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinner thrown about your stomach like a merry-go-round.
You’d been on the Merry for months now, and still your stomach had you questioning whether it had truly been a wise decision with each new storm that rolled through the hull. Sanji told you that, eventually, it would get better. Easier. That your sea legs would come to you sooner than you think.
You were still waiting on the easier part.
The best thing about port meant a new town that featured new markets to explore for ingredients and plants to test out salves and brews. The last town you’d been able to stop at, much to Zoro’s ire, Sanji had gone with you to haunt the market stalls. The names of ingredients and plants you’d both been searching for were written down, while Sanji named off ingredients at your back like an excited child in a toy store.
“Do you know how hard this is to find?” Or your personal favorite, “You’re going to fall in love with me after tasting this with dinner tonight, Doc. Just you wait.” Earning him a death glare from Zoro, which only made Sanji’s devilish grin grow.
New taverns with new smells of foods also meant they were full of Zoro’s second favorite thing - booze. You still owed him a new case for losing your last sparring match. You really needed to stop accepting bets with him before you ran out of money. But maybe, just maybe, you could bribe him with a top-tier case of booze. One that might be so damn good, it was enough to make Zoro forget for just a few more days that he wanted to talk.
Your eyes scanned over the ocean's glittering surface, where the edges of the town came closer into view. The desire to place your feet on solid ground, to check the endless rows of possible market stalls and open shops with Nami. It was becoming a favorite pastime of yours to spend the day watching her haggle deals for items. She was truly a wordsmith and always seemed to walk away with what she wanted.
It also meant there was a very real possibility that a looming Zoro-shaped shadow wouldn’t be too far behind. Fingers pressed against your lower back, moving you gently like a breeze away from people, stores, or whatever he didn’t care for. Which seemed to always be a lot of things. Never a bar, though.
What you could personally look forward to was one of your favorite pastimes: locating pastry shops. The aroma of yeasted bread freshly risen in a tin, slathered in confectionery sugars or honey, filled with custards and topped with intricate designs of fruits was something you’d loved since you were a girl. Naan couldn’t always afford to give you those treats outside of special occasions, but you were old enough now to afford them yourself. And maybe you’d be able to enjoy them this time if Luffy and the boys didn’t get into their usual trouble.
No matter where you found yourselves, one of the boys seemed to locate trouble the way Luffy located meat. Which whittled down to being incredibly easy and far too often. You’d heard the argument earlier between Usopp and the rest of the crew: Loguetown was essentially the worst port any pirate vessel could pick. But between here and the Grand Line, it was the best viable option for supplies.
And possible death.
The thud of the weights reverberating down as an earthquake across the Merry’s hull brought you back to the present. Each release and lift was a silent threat that Zoro was dangerously close to splintering the ship in two.
You should’ve been focused on all the prospects a new town offered. Yet, here you were sitting in this particular spot, on this particular container, for the past two hours. A pear you’d snatched earlier that morning from the counter in Sanji’s kitchen, resting uneaten in your lap.
And, no, you were most definitely not pouting. Nope. No pouting or hiding here.
Your imagination was dangerously close to running away again when a ring-clad hand burst past your peripherals. A steaming cup of what smelled like coffee wiggling softly side-to-side in welcome. You didn’t have to look up to know the hand belonged to a handsomely flirtatious cook.
“I got worried when I didn’t see my favorite girl at breakfast this morning.”
You prayed he couldn’t physically hear your eyes roll as you took the coffee from his waiting hand.
“I thought Nami was your favorite girl?” You quipped, hiding your smirk against the mug's rim.
“It’s a revolving system,” he clarified warmly.
“Mhmm.”
“And, technically, you both have special reserved seating in my life.”
Playfully, you peeked over the rising steam from the cup. Your lips retracting from the rim for another sip, a mischievous question lingered on your tongue.
“So, Monsieur Vinsmoke,” you could practically see Sanji preening at your use of French. If you were able to tell him the ingredients inside a chouquette or find him what he asked for in his kitchen, the man combusted. “Who currently has the better reserved seating at the moment?”
You had to give it to him. When Sanji smiled, it was every ounce of the term ‘devilishly handsome’. Extra emphasis on the handsome.
“Currently, it would be you.”
“But only cause it’s simple ol’ me,” you quipped.
“Nah. I wouldn’t call you simple, Doc. You’re far from simple.”
“Careful, Sanji. If Zoro hears you, you’ll be dodging weights again.”
Your statement earned you a lethal combination of eye roll and scoff.
“Oh, please. You know, I’ll never quite understand what you see in that Moss Head. He isn’t even good with directions.”
God, was that statement painfully true. Zoro was infamous for being directionally impaired and yet…you hadn’t been ready for Sanji to voice it out loud.
The sharp huff that tinged his words in disbelief turned what could’ve been a hostile sentence into something that left your slurp of coffee ruthlessly sucked into your nose. Your would-be laughter dies in a painfully heated cough and watery eyes. Your fingers were pinching the bridge of your nose to try and quell the burning sensation, while you wondered, quite seriously, if it was possible to melt your nose from the inside out.
Sanji’s hand came to gently pat your back and continued to do so until you gestured that you were okay. You were, in fact, not dying from inhaled coffee consumption today.
“You alright?”
“Are you asking because I inhaled liquid coffee beans or just in general?”
“I would say it’s because you just inhaled half of my special French brew through your nose,” Sanji quipped, “because I feel like if I answer with, ‘in general’, you’re going to give me the silent treatment.”
If you were braver, you would’ve glanced back at Sanji. You would’ve greeted the warmth of his ocean blues with your own and fought the good fight for your eyes to finish telling the lie. The ability to shit-talk your way out of any situation was a trait you picked up from holding a lifelong friendship membership with Usopp and all of his…shenanigans.
Teasing Sanji should’ve come easy for you, especially whenever you used a certain green-haired archnemesis in playful comparisons. Instead, you felt the cracks begin to spread at the edges of your smile. The sounds of a humming hymn pounding in your veins and the caw of a raven you were beginning to swear relentlessly followed you, coming from overhead.
You weren’t sure when you started noticing their presence - these two ravens. Whether they were a figment of your imagination or real, their presence left an ominous foreboding deep in your chest.
It was just birds. Very large birds.
It’s been weeks since the first time you’d noticed the pair of them at the last village. The two of them hopped on the awning above a stall of dry herbs and tonics. Their cawing increased with each hop that led them closer to where you’d stood beside Zoro.
One of the large ravens appeared again a couple of nights later. This time outside your window. The gloss of its feathers blended oil thick between the midnight hues of night and ocean. It’d almost been impossible to see until it drew closer to your cabin window; the body perched seamlessly at the edge. The sensible part of your brain warned you that something was off with the raven. Your body reacted to the warning signal with a hand reaching out to wake Zoro, but at the very last minute, you froze at the sound. It sounded less like its usual caw. It was shadowed in something that sounded strikingly familiar to a word.
A sharp caw drew you from your thoughts and back to the present. Your gaze located the raven and watched it disappear behind a cloud. The warmth of Sanji’s presence beside you reminds you quickly that he was still there, still watching, and waiting for you to respond.
But your imagination ran wild with endless possibilities that their constant presence felt more than a simple coincidence. Your anxiety took hold with violent shapes and what-ifs, transforming small things into something larger, more triggering, to send your heart shattering to pieces with each rapid beat against your chest.
How long would it take for the smallest sound of scraping utensils against plates or the steel glint of knives to not make you flinch? The sight of fishmen, working diligently at markets, causes your vision to spot in black and white fireworks behind retinas with a hand digging into your sternum. The panic radiated into a pain that made it nearly impossible to breathe.
Finally, your gaze dropped to the warm mug of coffee he’d brought you. Your hands brought it to your lips to take a sip before you asked, “Did he send you?”
You didn’t need to glance over at Sanji to know his face contorted with a raised brow in disbelief that that specific question had ever left your mouth. It was still funny to see all the same.
"You're right. Dumb question."
You watched as he rubbed his palms gently down the length of his slacks. As if he was trying to completely rub the idea away that he would do anything friendly for the Moss Head.
"He's just worried about you, ya know. We all are."
Worry flashed like lightning in the blue of his eyes; quick and sudden as a storm. It was what you’d been struggling to avoid, and now, you couldn’t deny that his worry was real, that it carried weight, just like everyone else’s.
"I wish you would all stop worrying about me."
"Fat chance at that, Doc,” he replied, his shoulder gently nudging yours. An intrusive grunt of Zoro lifting his weights, allowing them to thunder back down on the hull, cut through the would-be tender moment, leaving Sanji fighting off a shiver of disgust. "This is probably the most uncomfortable spot you could've picked on this ship.”
“I would say uncomfortable for you maybe, but-,” you drew out the U in the word and ended it with an abrupt T when you nudged his shoulder. “-if you wanted to be really uncomfortable, it would be in our bedroom.”
“I could’ve gone a million lifetimes without ever hearing you say that to me. If I need therapy, Doc, I’m bringing you the bill.”
Laughter flooded in your chest and erupted, abrupt and harsh, at the horror that etched itself along Sanji’s features.
It must have been the sound of laughter that drew Zoro over to your position. You’d been relatively quiet, pensive, and lost in the trenches of your own thoughts. The sudden change was enough to spark his curiosity about what could have possibly lightened your mood. When his eyes landed on your spot, you now shared with Sanji, you watched the curiosity bleed into something dark. His jaw ticked as his teeth clenched together.
Zoro’s jealousy never stemmed from the superficial. It was housed in a deep-seated feeling that no matter how much of himself he gave - how much he tried - it would never be enough. It was there whenever Luffy found excitement with towns and their people or handed out compliments to his crew (particularly Sanji), and it was there now as he watched you brighten up for the first time in days besides your favorite cook.
Zoro stood before you (technically, he was standing over you, looking down at you over the railing), the extent of his earlier workout evident by the perspiration that soaked through strands of hair with droplets that ran down his chest and shoulders. His sun-kissed skin was haloed by the sun, and for one heartbreaking moment, you couldn’t fathom how he didn’t realize the hold he held on you.
Zoro was complicated. Unapologetically calloused with a veneer of humor dryer than sandpaper. He was stoic. Harsh. Moody. Endearingly helpful. Directionally impaired. Zoro was everything you imagined a man hellbent on becoming the greatest would be. But with you, he allowed himself to be something he usually never was.
Soft.
You knew the way his body leaned closer at your touch. The way his nose nestled into the crease of your neck as you slept or how his fingertips traveled the expanse of your body as if committing every part of you - all the scars and flaws you feared ruined you, turned you into someone you couldn’t recognize - to memory. He brightened when you shared new recipe ideas or medical facts, not just because he was interested in listening, but because it was you. He brightened because you believed in him, to know he was smart enough to be a part of the excitement and taught him when he was just a little lost.
You were both a little more broken than when you first met, although neither of you would be willing to admit it. Zoro took his moment of failure and molded the experience to be a part of his greatness. You? You were too chicken shit to ever tell him that you died and came back a little less whole; a little more wrong. Zoro, in his own way, was unable to admit that the cracks Kuina left fractured wider as he ran back to the village with you dying in his arms.
All this accumulated to communication not being either of your strong points, which was why when Zoro tilted his head for you to make your way over to him, you were equal parts annoyed and distracted. Painfully distracted.
It hardly seemed fair that seeing Zoro shirtless always left you flustered. You’d think after sharing a room the last few months with the man, you would be immune to the muscles, but you weren’t. If anything, it’d only gotten worse since Zoro had recently begun to work out more frequently with longer sessions and heavier weights, resulting in him getting…bigger.
You felt your body swing off its spot on the container, and while you passed by Sanji, your hand gently tapped his knee in thanks. You watched with amusement as Zoro’s eyes tracked the movement. A question pressed against his teeth, barely contained, until you were almost in front of him.
“What’s with the waiter?”
“I thought you’d sent him to come talk to me.”
As your reply registered in his brain, you watched as Zoro’s body grew still. A tick in his jaw was the only indication you had of his annoyance. His eyes flicked over your shoulder to where you’d left Sanji.
“Yeah. I wouldn’t do that.”
“Funny. He said the same thing,” you quipped, unable to keep the smile from spreading across your lips. “How was the workout?”
“It was fine. We’re going to be coming into Loguetown soon. Figured I’d come get you so we can get ready.”
The first time Zoro started this now infamous tradition between the two of you, it’d been at the first stop after the Conomi Islands. It was an unspoken anxiety. One you knew Zoro would vehemently deny if anyone ever brought it up.
It was the same anxiety that kept him glued to you the minute you stepped off the Merry. Anywhere that wasn’t the ship; anywhere that wasn’t the safety of your shared room or his body. It was why he’d spent the last months tirelessly training you in combat. You knew it was partially meant to make you feel strong - some semblance of control - but there was no denying that for Zoro, it chipped away at the ice-cold fear that lingered under the surface of having to let you go.
This system he came up with was a meticulous set of steps the two of you followed to the very letter. One that allowed him to tamp down the restlessness that threatened to swallow him whole. The uneasiness of the possibility that he’d let you go with the unknowns, and what could possibly happen if he didn't find out until Nami told him. Because if you weren’t with him, Zoro would bet a million berries the two of you would be off getting into some sort of trouble.
So, when he turned to head back towards your room, he didn’t have to take your hand to tug you along or listen to you grumble about being your own person.
Zoro needed this. And it was something simple for you to give.
So you quietly followed behind him down the hallway to your room. Your shoulder purposely grazed across his bare chest while you moved past him at the door. You were trying to rile him up. Just enough to ease the tension his thoughts were causing in his shoulders. You sat patiently on the bed and watched him pull out the thigh harness Zoro had crafted at the last town. It fit snug across your hips and thigh, but he’d made sure - in his thoughtful design - the placement of your nunchucks holster wouldn’t impede on the pockets of your cargo pants.
Zoro knew how much you loved the multipurpose utility options of your pockets.
Without thinking, you reached out to take the harness from him. The action earned you a raised brow in question and a defensive pull to keep it out of arm's reach.
“What do you think you’re doing?”
“We’re almost to port, and you need a shower,” you replied, your tone flat and pointing out the obvious.
“And you figured this was a good reason to do your own harness?”
“I’m not five, Zoro,” you chided. More softly, you reminded him, “Plus, you’re all…sweaty.”
You were close to adding that you didn’t mind. His damp hair softened the sharpness of his jaw and the high rise of his cheeks. The freckles the sun kissed across them only aided in making the pout of his lips a mixture of sinful and boyish. It was his body, however, that made your throat feel like you’d tried swallowing past sand.
The hard work Zoro put in over the last few months was showcased by the width of his shoulders. His biceps were wide, and when crossed over his chest, the muscles flexed together in a war of who would be the largest. His forearms taut and laced with veins that stole your attention with each movement - even when he was simply pointing at Sanji’s chest. The scar from his encounter with Mihawke lightened itself down enough to where, if you weren’t looking for it, you’d almost not know it was there.
You knew it was there. You’d traced it enough times at night to be able to find it even in the dark.
The smirk that quirked Zoro’s lips should’ve been the first warning you were in trouble. Your brain registers too late the playful way his eyes darkened as he closed the remaining space between you. Deft hands that knew every inch of your body effortlessly moved the harness around your waist - pulling the leather tight and latching it into place. All with the heat of his gaze boring down on you with a salacious smirk that sent your heart pounding.
“You never complained before about me being so sweaty,” he teased, his voice caressing down your spine, smooth as velvet.
His words were a match that ignited a flush, warm and troublesome, along your skin. You were tempted to try and break eye contact, but by the way his smirk threatened to bloom into a full-blown smile, there would be no reason to attempt it. So, you went with option two and swatted him playfully on the shoulder.
The miniature attack broke Zoro’s face into sunshine with a smile. The warmth of his laughter filled your room, causing your own smile to spread across your lips against your will.
“That’s not playing fair.”
He dropped down to one knee. A skilled hand tapping his waiting thigh in silent instruction to place your foot where he’d asked. You made sure to drop it down with just a little extra attitude.
The mirth in Zoro’s eyes kept them bright - playful - and yet, the earlier desire left his pupils blown wide as he stared up at you. His eyes were solely focused on your face, watching as his hands traveled painstakingly slow up your leg. His fingers ghosted over your inner thigh as he tightened the strap into place.
“I never said I’d play a fair game when it comes to you, Snowdrop.” His gaze took you in from his place at your feet. His fingers danced dangerously between teasing and focused; intent mixed between preparing you when you docked and having you come undone at his hands. “Are you ever going to tell me what’s been going on these past couple of weeks?”
Zoro’s tone wasn’t angry. The question was delicate and whisper soft, like having to ask drew his worry out of the grave he’d tried to bury it in. You hated that for any ounce of a second, Zoro’s worry stole the joy from his chest.
He thought it was recent - your sleepless nights and sleepwalking. Only a few days here and there of staring blankly and dissociating into a space you couldn’t name, which accumulated to a couple of weeks. In reality, you’d become a master of covering up these parts of you that you didn’t want anyone else to see, since you’d opened your eyes back in that hut.
The thought collided unspoken behind your teeth. The words sour and forced your lips to purse into a look Zoro knew well. In real time, you watched his brightness dim down in ounces. His attention was back on securing the last notch of the harness into place before placing your foot back on the floor before he moved to stand.
“Zoro-“
His name held so much. An apology was the main one he was tired of hearing.
“I’m trying to be patient here.” His words cut you off, stopping whatever weak attempt at avoidance you might try this time. “You know it’s not the easiest for me.”
“Oh, I don’t know,” you hummed. “You do a lot better than you think.”
It was meant to be a comfort. An honest statement that his presence alone did more for you than anything else ever could.
“If that were true, you would feel safer telling me what it is that’s haunting you, Snowdrop. You’d confide in me more. Trust that I only want to help you, not because it benefits me. I want you to stop letting your demons steal the life you have while you’re able to live it.”
His hand reached up to cup your cheek in his palm. A thumb traces the bottom of your lip before dipping down to your chin to caress underneath. If someone walked in the room, you knew they would just see the two of you, eyes locked on the other and sharing the same breath, waiting for the other to breathe.
He didn’t need to tell you he only wanted the best for you. While he was overprotective at times, it never came from a place of malice or ownership. His jealousy comes from a place of fear that he might not be good enough; that you could find better. There could never be anyone who loved you, cared for you, as fiercely as Zoro did. The heart of gold that protected his captain, his crew (yes, even the waiter), because that was the kind of man he was.
Staring into his eyes now, you hoped your own could convey on some level how much you appreciated him. Which is what made trying to explain that you felt like you were going crazy, that you believed something came back with you, riding under your skin, felt like trying to speak while being dragged deeper into quicksand.
“I don’t know…I don’t-“ you closed your eyes to try and break away from his gaze. Your mind focused on the thundering of your heart and the warmth his hand left behind after he’d removed it from your face. “I don’t know how to explain what’s going on. I can’t make sense of it, Zoro. All I know is I don’t feel like me anymore - like something crawled inside and is rearranging everything about me.”
You braced yourself to open your eyes; to maybe see in real time his perception of you change, expecting to see the beginning of what you feared. The first hint that someone agreed that you came back unholy.
The only thing you found waiting for you wasn’t fear, uncertainty, or anger. Zoro looked at you like you were his purpose - his entire center - and the reason the heavens painted the sunset the way they did. The reassurance of his presence was enough to send a gasp of air to lodge itself inside your chest. A weak attempt to fight back the tears that threatened to drown you.
“Only those who have suffered long can see the light within the shadows.” Without hesitation, Zoro pulled you close to his chest and wrapped his arms around you. His cheek pressed against your hair as he spoke. “You died, Doc. Something like that is going to change you, but only you get to decide how it’s going to shape you.”
Zoro’s words resonated along your skin. Each syllable sinks down into the marrow of your bones to take root. You wanted to ask if it was possible that hope, replacing the fearmongering of your own death, could grow in its place. Standing there wrapped in the warmth of Zoro’s arms, his body real, warm, and present, was enough to make you begin to believe it could.
A quick succession of pounding erupted on the door and sent you jumping against him, which earned a deep chuckle that Zoro pressed against the curve of your throat.
“It’s just Luffy.”
“How do you know?”
Your question was answered as Luffy called behind the door, “We’re getting ready to dock, guys! Meet on the deck in fifteen!”
You pulled back just enough from Zoro’s chest to be greeted by a smirk that said, “Told you so.” You pushed out an exaggerated huff to accompany an eye roll as you disentangled yourself from him. You became immediately aware that you were now lightly covered in dried Zoro sweat.
“Oh, great. Now I bet I stink,” you mumbled, lifting your tank top to your nose for added measure.
“I might be biased, but I think you smell great.”
If you rolled your eyes any harder, you were sure you’d lose brain cells.
“You think a brewery smells like a candy store. I’m taking that comment with the tiniest, thinnest possible grain of salt.”
“If it bothers you that much, you could come with me to shower.”
Damn him. Already, the need to do just that hit you something sharp and coiling achingly low.
“Luffy said to be on the dock in fifteen minutes,” you said to remind yourself more than him. “If we take too long, they’ll know we were…uhm…occupied.”
You were starting to think Zoro’s favorite pastime really was seeing just how many shades of red he could make you. A shit-eating grin erupted across his face, and you knew whatever he was about to say was going to send whatever shade you currently were to your ears.
“Snowdrop, by now, the whole crew knows what we get up to. Especially the waiter.”
For added unnecessary emphasis, Zoro made sure to throw his thumb over his shoulder, indicating the wall behind him. The wall that directly resided next to Sanji’s room.
“Oh my god, okay!” You practically shrieked. Your hand shot out to grab the steel of your nunchucks before sliding them home in their holster. Your fingers were clasping the strap over them as you continued, “I am leaving now. Yeah. I’m going to the deck. I’ll brave the pastry shops smelling musky.”
Without waiting for a response, you opened your bedroom door and stepped back out into the hall. Your feet carry you towards the stairs that lead to the deck where Luffy, Nami, Sanji, and Usopp would be waiting. The sounds of their boisterous chatter were enough to speed up your movements so you could be wrapped in the warmth of conversation.
They all greeted you with smiles, and Usopp with a brotherly embrace. One that the two of you have followed up with your secret handshake since childhood. It was one of the many things that joined your made-up hand signals, and bird calls that drove the entire crew nuts when you each took turns riding up in the crow’s nest.
You allowed yourself to be swallowed up in the laughter and squabbling - mainly taking place because Usopp still didn’t agree that stopping in Loguetown for any reason was a good reason. The way Nami motioned with head nods and wide eyes to step in with an agreement that a girl's day of shopping was indeed a reasonable reason. Beyond reasonable, actually.
This familiar back and forth made it easy to be present: the first step in taking Zoro’s advice. The shadows may be a part of you, but only you get to decide how they claim you. It was easier said than done, and yet looking at the faces of your crew - your family - you were willing to start moving forward.
Whatever that entailed, and yet the soft voice in the back of your mind sparked to life. Nothing vivid and disarming; its usual words harsh and violent like a lashing to open skin. It was methodical, hushed. The delicate toxicity of its words moves fluidly like inky black smoke, leaving a residue over the hope you dare thought you could have.
“They’re blind to the very wolf that lives among them.”
Violently, you shook your head to dislodge the thought before it left you dissociating into a vivid what if. Maybe in Loguetown there might be a shop or a stall that sells lovely tea or crystals or something to make whatever this part of you was chill. the. fuck. out.
Zoro came sauntering in freshly cleaned, with his chest practically threatening to bust through the seams of his Gi-style shirt. You waited until he situated himself beside you, forearm resting against the railing as his eyes took in the current argumentative debate Usopp and Sanji were having about personal space in the kitchen.
“We should look into updating your wardrobe while we’re there,” you whispered into his ear.
You couldn’t explain the sheer amount of joy you got at seeing Zoro’s skin flush with goosebumps and heat. His gaze moved to take you in, so close beside him he’d simply have to lean down, and your lips would connect. By the shift in his eyes, you could tell Zoro was thinking about doing just that.
“What’s wrong with the clothes I have on?”
“It’s tight.”
“It’s comfortable.”
“The fabric looks like it’s screaming for help.”
Zoro closed in what limited space had already been between you - close enough that when he smirked, the rise of his lip grazed over yours. There was no fighting off the shiver of anticipation that rolled through you - a part of you wishing you had when the smirk grew higher.
“If you want me to take it off, Snowdrop, all you had to do was ask.”
“Oh my god!” Nami’s annoyance separated you cleanly from one another by a few inches. You were still tucked into the crook of Zoro’s side when you looked her way. “Am I going to have to separate you two already?”
“I call Doc when you do,” Sanji cut in.
“Fat chance of that happening,” Zoro bristled.
His mild threat only made Sanji’s Cheshire Cat grin spread like wildfire across his face. If there was one thing Sanji loved more than cooking in his kitchen, it was living to ruffle Zoro’s metaphorical feathers as often as humanly possible.
You wondered if it was payback for being stuck next to the thin walls of your room. You could practically feel the heat creeping up your neck to burn blazing hot across your cheeks.
“While it would be truly riveting to watch you two idiots go back and forth,” Nami cut back in, “We really should get moving. We don’t want to stay in Loguetown too long and gain unwanted attention.”
“And to see where Gold Rodger died,” Luffy added.
“Yes,” Nami deadpanned. “Can’t forget that.”
“What are we waiting for? Let’s go!”
“I just want to remind everyone that I did not, and still don’t, think this is a good idea,” Usopp interjected.
His hands were already worrying at the strap of his bag. You pushed off the railing and went to him. Your arm slides around his shoulders, using the crook of your elbow to pull him in closer. Using the small grip you had on him, you used it to get him to move forward to follow Luffy off the deck and down the ramp to shore.
“It’s been duly noted, Usopp,” you said. “Now, how about we just try and enjoy our possible last chance being on land.”
Eyes wide with terror greeted you seconds after the last word left your mouth. The whites of his eyes became more exposed with each step you took down to the cobbled road in front of you.
“Why do you gotta say it like that, Doc?” He questioned. Each word dripping with anxiety, you could practically feel on your skin. “This really could be our last time doing anything! Any-thing!”
“Usopp. You know I love you. You seriously need to relax.”
“How can you ask me to relax when we are walking into death? Death, Doc?!”
You gave him one last tight hug before you released him. Your body gave a brief shrug in response that somehow made his eyes widen impossibly bigger.
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It means, Usopp, that maybe a little possibility of death is worth some fun, and we need the supplies, and that is one universal fact you can’t dispute with. Plus, the only one who had any run-in with death is me, and look how fine I am.”
“Not funny,” Zoro grumbled from behind you while Usopp said, “You are most definitely the farthest person from okay on this ship. I’m pretty sure you’re almost certifiable.”
“Wow, okay. Rude.”
You fell into step behind Luffy, who fearlessly moved through the crowds of people. His eyes filled with childlike merriment as they hungrily took in the scenery around him, and what a scenery it was to behold.
You’d never seen a city quite like Loguetown. Everything was industrial; a majority of shops appeared to be inside actual buildings, with only a few random small stalls of merchants placed at random outside. There were cars and trolleys, which were something you’d only seen in magazines Kaya received at the manor. Syrup village never had use for trolleys or giant, elegant cement buildings that towered over the horizon. Each one housed sweet shops, finery of jewels with fabrics that ranged from silks to wool, meats, and ceilings full of lights and pops of color from hanging umbrellas.
Loguetown made you feel every bit the small village girl as you stepped through the archway and into the main square.
You weren’t so enamored with everything around you that it made you oblivious to the heat of Zoro at your back. The way his finger grazed the waist of your pants to remind you that he was there or moving too far ahead of him.
The last couple of places Luffy had the Merry stop at for supplies were nothing compared to Loguetown. Besides the abundance of Marines you were already seeing, the number of people in general was beyond what you were all used to.
Zoro’s anxiety must have been going into overdrive.
“There are so many people,” Usopp mentioned in awe.
He was equally as stunned as you were at the sheer size of Loguetown. You wanted to ask him if he was thinking about Syrup village, too. All the differences Loguetown had in the first five seconds of entry compared to the island you’d both grown up on.
Your group walked to the column that stood in the center of the entrance. Nami read off the plaque's engraving of “The town of the beginning and the end.”
“Well, that sounds ominous,” you grumbled.
You refused to let some weird engraved words ruin this moment for you. There were so many new things for you to see, and you were in charge of getting first aid supplies. A spark of excitement at all the potential a place like this had in introducing you to new medicines - new herbs - was palpable.
They were lucky Zoro had his index hooked in the hoop of your pants, or you might have taken off on your own.
“This is where it all started. The hunt for the One Piece. History happened here!”
God, why didn’t you expect Luffy to start yelling like an excited lunatic? Your captain was so radioactive in his excitement, his body vibrated with it. It still didn’t mean yelling like a crazy person, arms thrown wide to grab hold of the universe in a thank you hug, made garnering any extra attention less sketchy.
Every single one of you took turns glancing in every direction just to make sure no one was looking at you all a little too long.
“It looks like they’re having some kind of festival,” Sanji pointed out.
“Ooo, do you think they’ll have a parade?” You asked him excitedly.
Sanji would be willing to feed into your excitement, while Zoro, being ever the pragmatist, quickly piped up with, “For Gold Rodger’s execution.”
“You just have to suck the fun out of a good time, don’t cha?”
You loved this man. You really did, but sometimes…
“What?” He responded. The crease between his forehead perfectly matched the question in his eyes. “It says it right there on the banners.”
“I saw that.”
“Then why ask for a parade?”
“Zoro, darling, if you have to ask, it does not matter anymore.”
“A festival’s not so good for laying low,” Usopp pointed out.
The town, the sights, and the setting were overwhelming. So overwhelming that you hadn’t noticed Luffy had started wandering off until you watched Sanji give chase. He easily caught up with him and turned him back around towards the group.
“Then we’ll just have to be smart. No attracting unnecessary attention.”
The minute Luffy stepped back into the circle, he did so with his arm raised, as if someone would call on him to ask his vote.
“I want to see the execution platform!”
“Morbid.”
“What, no.” Luffy’s smile halted for the smallest millisecond before it resumed its usual place. “It’s where everything began, Doc. The story of the One Piece.”
“I caught that.”
“Sanji,” Nami cut in. “What if you take Luffy with you for some food shopping?”
“Mmmm,” Sanji hummed in approval.
Everyone understood the unspoken assignment.
“Food first, then execution platform!”
Nami was already digging into the depths of her purse. Her hands scrapping up the berry she had sectioned off with the purpose for each amount jotted down in her head. You wouldn’t be surprised if she knew how much berry was in each individual stack just from the feel alone.
“Right. Food will keep him out of trouble.”
“I am headed to the fashion district. Zoro, you need new swords, right?”
Zoro had stopped paying attention after Luffy brought up the execution platform. Nami saying his name brought him back into the conversation, but not before a hint of unease sent his eyes shifting between Loguetown and your group.
“I need money too.”
“Okay, what do you want me to do about it? Why don’t you ask Doc for money? She is your girlfriend.”
“Hey, wait a minute,” you butt in, voice taking full offense. “This money is for first aid supplies, remember? This isn’t “cover -for- a -sword,” money.”
“The cook got money?” He interjected, looking between Nami and Sanji.
“I’m buying food for all of us.”
“Me having more swords is for all of us,” Zoro shot back.
The annoyance rippled off him in waves as he stared over at Sanji. Sanji, on the other hand, looked completely undisturbed. At least he made a step up from waiter to cook, so that felt like a positive.
Nami’s own flash of irritation came as her hand dipped back inside her bag. A wad of berry, noticeably smaller than Sanji’s, was held in her hand. Zoro stepped forward, his hand already reaching to take it when Nami pulled it back at the last second.
“You take this, you pay me back. With 300% interest.”
“Can take the con artist out of the East Blue, but you can’t take the con artist out of the girl.”
“Hey, if you have a problem with it you can give him some of your berry,” Nami replied.
“Shutting up.”
“What if I need more?”
“You haggle?” Nami replied. She seemed genuinely confused. As if she forgot she was dealing with Roronoa Zoro, pirate hunter extraordinaire, but completely clueless about most basic life skills. “There’s a price they want and a price they will take.”
With the short lesson ended, Nami handed over the money to Zoro, who looked to still be processing what she’d told him. He glanced over at you and immediately stood taller. His fingers pushed the berry inside the pocket of his pants.
“Haggle. Fine.”
Usopp quickly added that he was going to be staying with Nami, using the excuse that a big city and a lone woman were a bad combination. You were tempted to remind Usopp that Nami was perfectly capable of getting into life-threatening situations like the rest of the Straw Hats, but decided against it. Why ruin it for the guy?
It was decided that once everyone got what they needed, you’d all meet back up here. You were just beginning to head down what you assumed would lead to medicinal shops when a familiar hand clasped around your wrist, stopping you short.
“Where are you going?”
The question wasn’t a demand. It was genuinely curious where you were going if he wasn’t about to follow.
“To get my portion of the supplies. Why?”
“I just thought-I thought you were going with me to look for swords.”
“Isn’t it said that a sword chooses its owner? You don’t need me for that.”
“But what if I want you there?”
The grip he’d held on your wrist transformed as he released it. His fingers trailed down the soft skin of your wrist until they came to the palm of your hand. Not grabbing or trying to hold, but softly suspended there. That way if you wanted to reach for him, as you usually did, you could.
You looked at this man who so blatantly adored you and couldn’t find it in you to feel anything else but gratitude for him. A man who only wanted to be your protector in more ways than one.
“Zoro, I’ll be okay.” You tried to keep your voice as soothing as possible and hoped it was working. “When I finish up getting my supplies, I promise I’ll come and find you.”
“How will you know where I’ll be?”
“There can’t be that many swordsmiths in Loguetown,” you pointed out.
“Good point.” The smile was small. It barely raised the corners of his mouth while he diverted his eyes from you to your hands that were still intertwined, but not. When Zoro finally looked back at you, he asked, “Come back to me?”
Four simple words, and yet, they held the sharpest meaning. You weren’t sure when it became the thing he’d say to you whenever there was a reason for the two of you to be a part. It wasn’t just four words. It was one of the last things you heard from him while he clutched you, iron tight to his chest as he ran with you back to Coco Village. A reminder of time wasted, and the lifetime you both promised to spend making up for it.
“Always.”
“I think I’m going to be sick,” Sanji grumbled.
“Shut up, Cook.”
You took that moment to move up on tiptoe and place a soft kiss against Zoro’s cheek just as you disconnected your hand from his. You all had things you needed to do before the day was over, and you didn’t want to waste the majority of your time not enjoying it.
So, the six of you went your separate ways with your promise to meet back in the center. It felt doable. It felt like today was going to be a good, normal, trouble-free day, because really, how much trouble could you all possibly get into?
Tag list: @tombraiderjones2505 @bbning @lyladoesart
As always, thank you for reading. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.
Synopsis: After the defeat of Arlong the five of you promised yourselves and each other to achieve your dreams on your way to the Grand Line, helping Luffy search for the One Piece. It seems simple enough, except for the minor detail that you died. Coming back from the brink of death, Zoro and the others have noticed you haven’t been the same. You aren’t sure if it’s Death himself chasing or just Baroque Works after you but facing your inner demons won’t be the only fight you’ll have to worry about when family comes calling.
Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader
Genre: established relationship, idiots to lovers, angst, mentions of smut, (will add stuff later) it’s an adventure, y’all!
Words: 8.6+
A/N: Hello, my darlings! It is I! Your resident clown! S2 finally came!! Like the first season, CITB: Wanted will be following the S2 storyline, while having my original plan of giving a backstory for Doc. Hopefully, I can integrate it well, and it all comes together like fine wine and chains to give someone a good time. There is a Roronoa Zoro line I used from Mr. Oda himself, and it’s outlined in bold. This chapter is going to deal with mentions of PTSD, because who wouldn’t have a little, ya know? As always, thank you all for being so lovely and so sweet. For being one of the best fandoms I’ve had the privilege of being a part of. I love y’all. Ok. No more rambling. I hope you guys love this. Much Love, Jenn
p.s. shout out to @deadneverlander for always being my clown bestie and the bestest editor-in-chief
Warnings: mentions of ptsd and trauma (list could grow idk man)
Chaos In Their Bones Masterlist
Previous
The soft scratching of Nami’s pencil etching coordinates on the map above was just the sort of calm you needed. The sound of precise tapping gently resonated down to find you in the safety of your favorite spot on the ship.
The small alcove was perfectly placed between the stern castle deck Nami maintained and the end of the Merry, featuring Nami’s trees, allowing for the illusion of privacy you were after. Plus, it was the only space on the Merry that you could sit as close as possible to the water without the hefty weight of judgment - and worry - that buried between your shoulder blades from your crew.
You’d been hiding - no, no, wait. No, not hiding. Hiding felt like you did something wrong. Technically, you were regrouping yourself, which sounded much better in said favorite spot. The branches of Nami’s growing tangerine trees gave ample coverage from anyone’s line of sight, if they just so happened to want to look, but never obstructed yours from the endless reflected hues of sapphire and teal of the water below.
It wasn’t just the minute sound of the water lapping against the Merry that gave you peace. It was all the details around the ship. The maddening scratching of Nami’s pencil on paper and the scrubbing of her eraser held purpose. One that kept Nami centered; her curiosity about the next step of the journey kept her eyes on the horizon with whatever big adventure lay waiting for her to claim.
And the possibility of treasure didn’t hurt either.
It’s what turned her drawing and writing into something reminiscent of a madman. Her pencil beat, woodpecker sharp, against the small wooden table Luffy bought her.
“The perfect size for our navigator and her notes,” he’d declared, beaming pure sunshine that you could’ve sworn could cure the criminally grumpy. If he’d beamed any harder, waiting for his praise, he’d set the very sun alight.
It was this methodical, maddening, and sure writing you found comforting. The same way you found comfort listening to Sanji move around the kitchen, whisk scraping rhythmically against the sides of a mixing bowl, or blade slicing through ingredients. A comfort in Luffy and Usopp’s good-natured yapping, or the sound of weights threatening to burst through the boards of the ships as Zoro trained.
It was all these small, insignificant sounds that held the most significance to you. Each one reminded you of something important.
You were alive. You were home.
And your consciousness - or whatever lay cracking beneath your ribs - screamed for chaos like a dying man.
Every moment you were awake, it hummed its demands against bone. A sickening song that grew and grew until you felt the vibration hum the tune in your teeth; gluttonous to destroy. You heard it. Felt it claw at the sinews and nerves every time you denied it. The way it pounded so loudly against the cage of your skull it made your teeth ache.
Every day you woke up aboard a ship with a family you loved. Who loved you back. Who’d proven that love with the same intensity to protect you, as you did for them. A family built on hardcore trauma bonding, sure, but a fierce love gripped you. Every single one of you chose the other - saw the good and capabilities of one another - and decided to call each other a crew in the end.
So, why did you feel hollow and aching, as if something was missing?
No. Not missing. Taken. That word felt more accurate than most. Every day you woke up grateful and hollow, a strange combination.
You knew it wasn’t just Zoro who noticed the change in you. Everyone tiptoed around you, careful with their words and gestures. Luffy, in particular, was careful in not flinging his arms wide in excitement; no unexpected movements that might leave you flinching. At dinner, no one let their utensils clatter on the table or scrape on plates after the first night Usopp’s fork dropped on the table and sent your soul practically vacating your body.
You tried to make light of the moments your pain forced them to walk on eggshells. A joke that forced fake laughter or dismissed the cracks that only grew larger behind your eyes.
You’d spent so long pretending everything was fine that you weren’t sure if you believed it yourself anymore. You were pretty sure, like 99% sure, that you’d unsuccessfully convinced everyone else that you were fine. Good as new. Hence, the distance that grew between you and the growing looks of concern at your continued refusal to talk. The sleepless nights; nights you’d sleepwalk to any corner of the boat, hands braced to throw you over, with Zoro undoubtedly following behind to protect you.
Always keeping watch.
But you were fine. Perfectly normal.
You knew this morning when Zoro left your now shared room, he was tired of the verbal run around. The way you closed yourself off because the right words seemed to fail you to describe what it was that crawled inside.
How could you tell him - any of them - that it felt like you’d been given someone else’s skin. That any time your thoughts weren’t occupying your own head, something else did. Plagued it with…no. You wouldn’t think it - wouldn’t say it out loud - in case it made it more real.
No. You didn’t have anything you could share that would make the situation any better. The best thing to do? Continue pretending like everything was absolutely normal. Nothing to see here.
So, no, you were not hiding.
You were simply hanging out in your favorite spot that just happened to be conveniently hidden.
The port of Loguetown peaked over the horizon. A calling card that you were soon reaching your next destination, and that meant one glorious thing: land. No more would you have to worry about your breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinner thrown about your stomach like a merry-go-round.
You’d been on the Merry for months now, and still your stomach had you questioning whether it had truly been a wise decision with each new storm that rolled through the hull. Sanji told you that, eventually, it would get better. Easier. That your sea legs would come to you sooner than you think.
You were still waiting on the easier part.
The best thing about port meant a new town that featured new markets to explore for ingredients and plants to test out salves and brews. The last town you’d been able to stop at, much to Zoro’s ire, Sanji had gone with you to haunt the market stalls. The names of ingredients and plants you’d both been searching for were written down, while Sanji named off ingredients at your back like an excited child in a toy store.
“Do you know how hard this is to find?” Or your personal favorite, “You’re going to fall in love with me after tasting this with dinner tonight, Doc. Just you wait.” Earning him a death glare from Zoro, which only made Sanji’s devilish grin grow.
New taverns with new smells of foods also meant they were full of Zoro’s second favorite thing - booze. You still owed him a new case for losing your last sparring match. You really needed to stop accepting bets with him before you ran out of money. But maybe, just maybe, you could bribe him with a top-tier case of booze. One that might be so damn good, it was enough to make Zoro forget for just a few more days that he wanted to talk.
Your eyes scanned over the ocean's glittering surface, where the edges of the town came closer into view. The desire to place your feet on solid ground, to check the endless rows of possible market stalls and open shops with Nami. It was becoming a favorite pastime of yours to spend the day watching her haggle deals for items. She was truly a wordsmith and always seemed to walk away with what she wanted.
It also meant there was a very real possibility that a looming Zoro-shaped shadow wouldn’t be too far behind. Fingers pressed against your lower back, moving you gently like a breeze away from people, stores, or whatever he didn’t care for. Which seemed to always be a lot of things. Never a bar, though.
What you could personally look forward to was one of your favorite pastimes: locating pastry shops. The aroma of yeasted bread freshly risen in a tin, slathered in confectionery sugars or honey, filled with custards and topped with intricate designs of fruits was something you’d loved since you were a girl. Naan couldn’t always afford to give you those treats outside of special occasions, but you were old enough now to afford them yourself. And maybe you’d be able to enjoy them this time if Luffy and the boys didn’t get into their usual trouble.
No matter where you found yourselves, one of the boys seemed to locate trouble the way Luffy located meat. Which whittled down to being incredibly easy and far too often. You’d heard the argument earlier between Usopp and the rest of the crew: Loguetown was essentially the worst port any pirate vessel could pick. But between here and the Grand Line, it was the best viable option for supplies.
And possible death.
The thud of the weights reverberating down as an earthquake across the Merry’s hull brought you back to the present. Each release and lift was a silent threat that Zoro was dangerously close to splintering the ship in two.
You should’ve been focused on all the prospects a new town offered. Yet, here you were sitting in this particular spot, on this particular container, for the past two hours. A pear you’d snatched earlier that morning from the counter in Sanji’s kitchen, resting uneaten in your lap.
And, no, you were most definitely not pouting. Nope. No pouting or hiding here.
Your imagination was dangerously close to running away again when a ring-clad hand burst past your peripherals. A steaming cup of what smelled like coffee wiggling softly side-to-side in welcome. You didn’t have to look up to know the hand belonged to a handsomely flirtatious cook.
“I got worried when I didn’t see my favorite girl at breakfast this morning.”
You prayed he couldn’t physically hear your eyes roll as you took the coffee from his waiting hand.
“I thought Nami was your favorite girl?” You quipped, hiding your smirk against the mug's rim.
“It’s a revolving system,” he clarified warmly.
“Mhmm.”
“And, technically, you both have special reserved seating in my life.”
Playfully, you peeked over the rising steam from the cup. Your lips retracting from the rim for another sip, a mischievous question lingered on your tongue.
“So, Monsieur Vinsmoke,” you could practically see Sanji preening at your use of French. If you were able to tell him the ingredients inside a chouquette or find him what he asked for in his kitchen, the man combusted. “Who currently has the better reserved seating at the moment?”
You had to give it to him. When Sanji smiled, it was every ounce of the term ‘devilishly handsome’. Extra emphasis on the handsome.
“Currently, it would be you.”
“But only cause it’s simple ol’ me,” you quipped.
“Nah. I wouldn’t call you simple, Doc. You’re far from simple.”
“Careful, Sanji. If Zoro hears you, you’ll be dodging weights again.”
Your statement earned you a lethal combination of eye roll and scoff.
“Oh, please. You know, I’ll never quite understand what you see in that Moss Head. He isn’t even good with directions.”
God, was that statement painfully true. Zoro was infamous for being directionally impaired and yet…you hadn’t been ready for Sanji to voice it out loud.
The sharp huff that tinged his words in disbelief turned what could’ve been a hostile sentence into something that left your slurp of coffee ruthlessly sucked into your nose. Your would-be laughter dies in a painfully heated cough and watery eyes. Your fingers were pinching the bridge of your nose to try and quell the burning sensation, while you wondered, quite seriously, if it was possible to melt your nose from the inside out.
Sanji’s hand came to gently pat your back and continued to do so until you gestured that you were okay. You were, in fact, not dying from inhaled coffee consumption today.
“You alright?”
“Are you asking because I inhaled liquid coffee beans or just in general?”
“I would say it’s because you just inhaled half of my special French brew through your nose,” Sanji quipped, “because I feel like if I answer with, ‘in general’, you’re going to give me the silent treatment.”
If you were braver, you would’ve glanced back at Sanji. You would’ve greeted the warmth of his ocean blues with your own and fought the good fight for your eyes to finish telling the lie. The ability to shit-talk your way out of any situation was a trait you picked up from holding a lifelong friendship membership with Usopp and all of his…shenanigans.
Teasing Sanji should’ve come easy for you, especially whenever you used a certain green-haired archnemesis in playful comparisons. Instead, you felt the cracks begin to spread at the edges of your smile. The sounds of a humming hymn pounding in your veins and the caw of a raven you were beginning to swear relentlessly followed you, coming from overhead.
You weren’t sure when you started noticing their presence - these two ravens. Whether they were a figment of your imagination or real, their presence left an ominous foreboding deep in your chest.
It was just birds. Very large birds.
It’s been weeks since the first time you’d noticed the pair of them at the last village. The two of them hopped on the awning above a stall of dry herbs and tonics. Their cawing increased with each hop that led them closer to where you’d stood beside Zoro.
One of the large ravens appeared again a couple of nights later. This time outside your window. The gloss of its feathers blended oil thick between the midnight hues of night and ocean. It’d almost been impossible to see until it drew closer to your cabin window; the body perched seamlessly at the edge. The sensible part of your brain warned you that something was off with the raven. Your body reacted to the warning signal with a hand reaching out to wake Zoro, but at the very last minute, you froze at the sound. It sounded less like its usual caw. It was shadowed in something that sounded strikingly familiar to a word.
A sharp caw drew you from your thoughts and back to the present. Your gaze located the raven and watched it disappear behind a cloud. The warmth of Sanji’s presence beside you reminds you quickly that he was still there, still watching, and waiting for you to respond.
But your imagination ran wild with endless possibilities that their constant presence felt more than a simple coincidence. Your anxiety took hold with violent shapes and what-ifs, transforming small things into something larger, more triggering, to send your heart shattering to pieces with each rapid beat against your chest.
How long would it take for the smallest sound of scraping utensils against plates or the steel glint of knives to not make you flinch? The sight of fishmen, working diligently at markets, causes your vision to spot in black and white fireworks behind retinas with a hand digging into your sternum. The panic radiated into a pain that made it nearly impossible to breathe.
Finally, your gaze dropped to the warm mug of coffee he’d brought you. Your hands brought it to your lips to take a sip before you asked, “Did he send you?”
You didn’t need to glance over at Sanji to know his face contorted with a raised brow in disbelief that that specific question had ever left your mouth. It was still funny to see all the same.
"You're right. Dumb question."
You watched as he rubbed his palms gently down the length of his slacks. As if he was trying to completely rub the idea away that he would do anything friendly for the Moss Head.
"He's just worried about you, ya know. We all are."
Worry flashed like lightning in the blue of his eyes; quick and sudden as a storm. It was what you’d been struggling to avoid, and now, you couldn’t deny that his worry was real, that it carried weight, just like everyone else’s.
"I wish you would all stop worrying about me."
"Fat chance at that, Doc,” he replied, his shoulder gently nudging yours. An intrusive grunt of Zoro lifting his weights, allowing them to thunder back down on the hull, cut through the would-be tender moment, leaving Sanji fighting off a shiver of disgust. "This is probably the most uncomfortable spot you could've picked on this ship.”
“I would say uncomfortable for you maybe, but-,” you drew out the U in the word and ended it with an abrupt T when you nudged his shoulder. “-if you wanted to be really uncomfortable, it would be in our bedroom.”
“I could’ve gone a million lifetimes without ever hearing you say that to me. If I need therapy, Doc, I’m bringing you the bill.”
Laughter flooded in your chest and erupted, abrupt and harsh, at the horror that etched itself along Sanji’s features.
It must have been the sound of laughter that drew Zoro over to your position. You’d been relatively quiet, pensive, and lost in the trenches of your own thoughts. The sudden change was enough to spark his curiosity about what could have possibly lightened your mood. When his eyes landed on your spot, you now shared with Sanji, you watched the curiosity bleed into something dark. His jaw ticked as his teeth clenched together.
Zoro’s jealousy never stemmed from the superficial. It was housed in a deep-seated feeling that no matter how much of himself he gave - how much he tried - it would never be enough. It was there whenever Luffy found excitement with towns and their people or handed out compliments to his crew (particularly Sanji), and it was there now as he watched you brighten up for the first time in days besides your favorite cook.
Zoro stood before you (technically, he was standing over you, looking down at you over the railing), the extent of his earlier workout evident by the perspiration that soaked through strands of hair with droplets that ran down his chest and shoulders. His sun-kissed skin was haloed by the sun, and for one heartbreaking moment, you couldn’t fathom how he didn’t realize the hold he held on you.
Zoro was complicated. Unapologetically calloused with a veneer of humor dryer than sandpaper. He was stoic. Harsh. Moody. Endearingly helpful. Directionally impaired. Zoro was everything you imagined a man hellbent on becoming the greatest would be. But with you, he allowed himself to be something he usually never was.
Soft.
You knew the way his body leaned closer at your touch. The way his nose nestled into the crease of your neck as you slept or how his fingertips traveled the expanse of your body as if committing every part of you - all the scars and flaws you feared ruined you, turned you into someone you couldn’t recognize - to memory. He brightened when you shared new recipe ideas or medical facts, not just because he was interested in listening, but because it was you. He brightened because you believed in him, to know he was smart enough to be a part of the excitement and taught him when he was just a little lost.
You were both a little more broken than when you first met, although neither of you would be willing to admit it. Zoro took his moment of failure and molded the experience to be a part of his greatness. You? You were too chicken shit to ever tell him that you died and came back a little less whole; a little more wrong. Zoro, in his own way, was unable to admit that the cracks Kuina left fractured wider as he ran back to the village with you dying in his arms.
All this accumulated to communication not being either of your strong points, which was why when Zoro tilted his head for you to make your way over to him, you were equal parts annoyed and distracted. Painfully distracted.
It hardly seemed fair that seeing Zoro shirtless always left you flustered. You’d think after sharing a room the last few months with the man, you would be immune to the muscles, but you weren’t. If anything, it’d only gotten worse since Zoro had recently begun to work out more frequently with longer sessions and heavier weights, resulting in him getting…bigger.
You felt your body swing off its spot on the container, and while you passed by Sanji, your hand gently tapped his knee in thanks. You watched with amusement as Zoro’s eyes tracked the movement. A question pressed against his teeth, barely contained, until you were almost in front of him.
“What’s with the waiter?”
“I thought you’d sent him to come talk to me.”
As your reply registered in his brain, you watched as Zoro’s body grew still. A tick in his jaw was the only indication you had of his annoyance. His eyes flicked over your shoulder to where you’d left Sanji.
“Yeah. I wouldn’t do that.”
“Funny. He said the same thing,” you quipped, unable to keep the smile from spreading across your lips. “How was the workout?”
“It was fine. We’re going to be coming into Loguetown soon. Figured I’d come get you so we can get ready.”
The first time Zoro started this now infamous tradition between the two of you, it’d been at the first stop after the Conomi Islands. It was an unspoken anxiety. One you knew Zoro would vehemently deny if anyone ever brought it up.
It was the same anxiety that kept him glued to you the minute you stepped off the Merry. Anywhere that wasn’t the ship; anywhere that wasn’t the safety of your shared room or his body. It was why he’d spent the last months tirelessly training you in combat. You knew it was partially meant to make you feel strong - some semblance of control - but there was no denying that for Zoro, it chipped away at the ice-cold fear that lingered under the surface of having to let you go.
This system he came up with was a meticulous set of steps the two of you followed to the very letter. One that allowed him to tamp down the restlessness that threatened to swallow him whole. The uneasiness of the possibility that he’d let you go with the unknowns, and what could possibly happen if he didn't find out until Nami told him. Because if you weren’t with him, Zoro would bet a million berries the two of you would be off getting into some sort of trouble.
So, when he turned to head back towards your room, he didn’t have to take your hand to tug you along or listen to you grumble about being your own person.
Zoro needed this. And it was something simple for you to give.
So you quietly followed behind him down the hallway to your room. Your shoulder purposely grazed across his bare chest while you moved past him at the door. You were trying to rile him up. Just enough to ease the tension his thoughts were causing in his shoulders. You sat patiently on the bed and watched him pull out the thigh harness Zoro had crafted at the last town. It fit snug across your hips and thigh, but he’d made sure - in his thoughtful design - the placement of your nunchucks holster wouldn’t impede on the pockets of your cargo pants.
Zoro knew how much you loved the multipurpose utility options of your pockets.
Without thinking, you reached out to take the harness from him. The action earned you a raised brow in question and a defensive pull to keep it out of arm's reach.
“What do you think you’re doing?”
“We’re almost to port, and you need a shower,” you replied, your tone flat and pointing out the obvious.
“And you figured this was a good reason to do your own harness?”
“I’m not five, Zoro,” you chided. More softly, you reminded him, “Plus, you’re all…sweaty.”
You were close to adding that you didn’t mind. His damp hair softened the sharpness of his jaw and the high rise of his cheeks. The freckles the sun kissed across them only aided in making the pout of his lips a mixture of sinful and boyish. It was his body, however, that made your throat feel like you’d tried swallowing past sand.
The hard work Zoro put in over the last few months was showcased by the width of his shoulders. His biceps were wide, and when crossed over his chest, the muscles flexed together in a war of who would be the largest. His forearms taut and laced with veins that stole your attention with each movement - even when he was simply pointing at Sanji’s chest. The scar from his encounter with Mihawke lightened itself down enough to where, if you weren’t looking for it, you’d almost not know it was there.
You knew it was there. You’d traced it enough times at night to be able to find it even in the dark.
The smirk that quirked Zoro’s lips should’ve been the first warning you were in trouble. Your brain registers too late the playful way his eyes darkened as he closed the remaining space between you. Deft hands that knew every inch of your body effortlessly moved the harness around your waist - pulling the leather tight and latching it into place. All with the heat of his gaze boring down on you with a salacious smirk that sent your heart pounding.
“You never complained before about me being so sweaty,” he teased, his voice caressing down your spine, smooth as velvet.
His words were a match that ignited a flush, warm and troublesome, along your skin. You were tempted to try and break eye contact, but by the way his smirk threatened to bloom into a full-blown smile, there would be no reason to attempt it. So, you went with option two and swatted him playfully on the shoulder.
The miniature attack broke Zoro’s face into sunshine with a smile. The warmth of his laughter filled your room, causing your own smile to spread across your lips against your will.
“That’s not playing fair.”
He dropped down to one knee. A skilled hand tapping his waiting thigh in silent instruction to place your foot where he’d asked. You made sure to drop it down with just a little extra attitude.
The mirth in Zoro’s eyes kept them bright - playful - and yet, the earlier desire left his pupils blown wide as he stared up at you. His eyes were solely focused on your face, watching as his hands traveled painstakingly slow up your leg. His fingers ghosted over your inner thigh as he tightened the strap into place.
“I never said I’d play a fair game when it comes to you, Snowdrop.” His gaze took you in from his place at your feet. His fingers danced dangerously between teasing and focused; intent mixed between preparing you when you docked and having you come undone at his hands. “Are you ever going to tell me what’s been going on these past couple of weeks?”
Zoro’s tone wasn’t angry. The question was delicate and whisper soft, like having to ask drew his worry out of the grave he’d tried to bury it in. You hated that for any ounce of a second, Zoro’s worry stole the joy from his chest.
He thought it was recent - your sleepless nights and sleepwalking. Only a few days here and there of staring blankly and dissociating into a space you couldn’t name, which accumulated to a couple of weeks. In reality, you’d become a master of covering up these parts of you that you didn’t want anyone else to see, since you’d opened your eyes back in that hut.
The thought collided unspoken behind your teeth. The words sour and forced your lips to purse into a look Zoro knew well. In real time, you watched his brightness dim down in ounces. His attention was back on securing the last notch of the harness into place before placing your foot back on the floor before he moved to stand.
“Zoro-“
His name held so much. An apology was the main one he was tired of hearing.
“I’m trying to be patient here.” His words cut you off, stopping whatever weak attempt at avoidance you might try this time. “You know it’s not the easiest for me.”
“Oh, I don’t know,” you hummed. “You do a lot better than you think.”
It was meant to be a comfort. An honest statement that his presence alone did more for you than anything else ever could.
“If that were true, you would feel safer telling me what it is that’s haunting you, Snowdrop. You’d confide in me more. Trust that I only want to help you, not because it benefits me. I want you to stop letting your demons steal the life you have while you’re able to live it.”
His hand reached up to cup your cheek in his palm. A thumb traces the bottom of your lip before dipping down to your chin to caress underneath. If someone walked in the room, you knew they would just see the two of you, eyes locked on the other and sharing the same breath, waiting for the other to breathe.
He didn’t need to tell you he only wanted the best for you. While he was overprotective at times, it never came from a place of malice or ownership. His jealousy comes from a place of fear that he might not be good enough; that you could find better. There could never be anyone who loved you, cared for you, as fiercely as Zoro did. The heart of gold that protected his captain, his crew (yes, even the waiter), because that was the kind of man he was.
Staring into his eyes now, you hoped your own could convey on some level how much you appreciated him. Which is what made trying to explain that you felt like you were going crazy, that you believed something came back with you, riding under your skin, felt like trying to speak while being dragged deeper into quicksand.
“I don’t know…I don’t-“ you closed your eyes to try and break away from his gaze. Your mind focused on the thundering of your heart and the warmth his hand left behind after he’d removed it from your face. “I don’t know how to explain what’s going on. I can’t make sense of it, Zoro. All I know is I don’t feel like me anymore - like something crawled inside and is rearranging everything about me.”
You braced yourself to open your eyes; to maybe see in real time his perception of you change, expecting to see the beginning of what you feared. The first hint that someone agreed that you came back unholy.
The only thing you found waiting for you wasn’t fear, uncertainty, or anger. Zoro looked at you like you were his purpose - his entire center - and the reason the heavens painted the sunset the way they did. The reassurance of his presence was enough to send a gasp of air to lodge itself inside your chest. A weak attempt to fight back the tears that threatened to drown you.
“Only those who have suffered long can see the light within the shadows.” Without hesitation, Zoro pulled you close to his chest and wrapped his arms around you. His cheek pressed against your hair as he spoke. “You died, Doc. Something like that is going to change you, but only you get to decide how it’s going to shape you.”
Zoro’s words resonated along your skin. Each syllable sinks down into the marrow of your bones to take root. You wanted to ask if it was possible that hope, replacing the fearmongering of your own death, could grow in its place. Standing there wrapped in the warmth of Zoro’s arms, his body real, warm, and present, was enough to make you begin to believe it could.
A quick succession of pounding erupted on the door and sent you jumping against him, which earned a deep chuckle that Zoro pressed against the curve of your throat.
“It’s just Luffy.”
“How do you know?”
Your question was answered as Luffy called behind the door, “We’re getting ready to dock, guys! Meet on the deck in fifteen!”
You pulled back just enough from Zoro’s chest to be greeted by a smirk that said, “Told you so.” You pushed out an exaggerated huff to accompany an eye roll as you disentangled yourself from him. You became immediately aware that you were now lightly covered in dried Zoro sweat.
“Oh, great. Now I bet I stink,” you mumbled, lifting your tank top to your nose for added measure.
“I might be biased, but I think you smell great.”
If you rolled your eyes any harder, you were sure you’d lose brain cells.
“You think a brewery smells like a candy store. I’m taking that comment with the tiniest, thinnest possible grain of salt.”
“If it bothers you that much, you could come with me to shower.”
Damn him. Already, the need to do just that hit you something sharp and coiling achingly low.
“Luffy said to be on the dock in fifteen minutes,” you said to remind yourself more than him. “If we take too long, they’ll know we were…uhm…occupied.”
You were starting to think Zoro’s favorite pastime really was seeing just how many shades of red he could make you. A shit-eating grin erupted across his face, and you knew whatever he was about to say was going to send whatever shade you currently were to your ears.
“Snowdrop, by now, the whole crew knows what we get up to. Especially the waiter.”
For added unnecessary emphasis, Zoro made sure to throw his thumb over his shoulder, indicating the wall behind him. The wall that directly resided next to Sanji’s room.
“Oh my god, okay!” You practically shrieked. Your hand shot out to grab the steel of your nunchucks before sliding them home in their holster. Your fingers were clasping the strap over them as you continued, “I am leaving now. Yeah. I’m going to the deck. I’ll brave the pastry shops smelling musky.”
Without waiting for a response, you opened your bedroom door and stepped back out into the hall. Your feet carry you towards the stairs that lead to the deck where Luffy, Nami, Sanji, and Usopp would be waiting. The sounds of their boisterous chatter were enough to speed up your movements so you could be wrapped in the warmth of conversation.
They all greeted you with smiles, and Usopp with a brotherly embrace. One that the two of you have followed up with your secret handshake since childhood. It was one of the many things that joined your made-up hand signals, and bird calls that drove the entire crew nuts when you each took turns riding up in the crow’s nest.
You allowed yourself to be swallowed up in the laughter and squabbling - mainly taking place because Usopp still didn’t agree that stopping in Loguetown for any reason was a good reason. The way Nami motioned with head nods and wide eyes to step in with an agreement that a girl's day of shopping was indeed a reasonable reason. Beyond reasonable, actually.
This familiar back and forth made it easy to be present: the first step in taking Zoro’s advice. The shadows may be a part of you, but only you get to decide how they claim you. It was easier said than done, and yet looking at the faces of your crew - your family - you were willing to start moving forward.
Whatever that entailed, and yet the soft voice in the back of your mind sparked to life. Nothing vivid and disarming; its usual words harsh and violent like a lashing to open skin. It was methodical, hushed. The delicate toxicity of its words moves fluidly like inky black smoke, leaving a residue over the hope you dare thought you could have.
“They’re blind to the very wolf that lives among them.”
Violently, you shook your head to dislodge the thought before it left you dissociating into a vivid what if. Maybe in Loguetown there might be a shop or a stall that sells lovely tea or crystals or something to make whatever this part of you was chill. the. fuck. out.
Zoro came sauntering in freshly cleaned, with his chest practically threatening to bust through the seams of his Gi-style shirt. You waited until he situated himself beside you, forearm resting against the railing as his eyes took in the current argumentative debate Usopp and Sanji were having about personal space in the kitchen.
“We should look into updating your wardrobe while we’re there,” you whispered into his ear.
You couldn’t explain the sheer amount of joy you got at seeing Zoro’s skin flush with goosebumps and heat. His gaze moved to take you in, so close beside him he’d simply have to lean down, and your lips would connect. By the shift in his eyes, you could tell Zoro was thinking about doing just that.
“What’s wrong with the clothes I have on?”
“It’s tight.”
“It’s comfortable.”
“The fabric looks like it’s screaming for help.”
Zoro closed in what limited space had already been between you - close enough that when he smirked, the rise of his lip grazed over yours. There was no fighting off the shiver of anticipation that rolled through you - a part of you wishing you had when the smirk grew higher.
“If you want me to take it off, Snowdrop, all you had to do was ask.”
“Oh my god!” Nami’s annoyance separated you cleanly from one another by a few inches. You were still tucked into the crook of Zoro’s side when you looked her way. “Am I going to have to separate you two already?”
“I call Doc when you do,” Sanji cut in.
“Fat chance of that happening,” Zoro bristled.
His mild threat only made Sanji’s Cheshire Cat grin spread like wildfire across his face. If there was one thing Sanji loved more than cooking in his kitchen, it was living to ruffle Zoro’s metaphorical feathers as often as humanly possible.
You wondered if it was payback for being stuck next to the thin walls of your room. You could practically feel the heat creeping up your neck to burn blazing hot across your cheeks.
“While it would be truly riveting to watch you two idiots go back and forth,” Nami cut back in, “We really should get moving. We don’t want to stay in Loguetown too long and gain unwanted attention.”
“And to see where Gold Rodger died,” Luffy added.
“Yes,” Nami deadpanned. “Can’t forget that.”
“What are we waiting for? Let’s go!”
“I just want to remind everyone that I did not, and still don’t, think this is a good idea,” Usopp interjected.
His hands were already worrying at the strap of his bag. You pushed off the railing and went to him. Your arm slides around his shoulders, using the crook of your elbow to pull him in closer. Using the small grip you had on him, you used it to get him to move forward to follow Luffy off the deck and down the ramp to shore.
“It’s been duly noted, Usopp,” you said. “Now, how about we just try and enjoy our possible last chance being on land.”
Eyes wide with terror greeted you seconds after the last word left your mouth. The whites of his eyes became more exposed with each step you took down to the cobbled road in front of you.
“Why do you gotta say it like that, Doc?” He questioned. Each word dripping with anxiety, you could practically feel on your skin. “This really could be our last time doing anything! Any-thing!”
“Usopp. You know I love you. You seriously need to relax.”
“How can you ask me to relax when we are walking into death? Death, Doc?!”
You gave him one last tight hug before you released him. Your body gave a brief shrug in response that somehow made his eyes widen impossibly bigger.
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It means, Usopp, that maybe a little possibility of death is worth some fun, and we need the supplies, and that is one universal fact you can’t dispute with. Plus, the only one who had any run-in with death is me, and look how fine I am.”
“Not funny,” Zoro grumbled from behind you while Usopp said, “You are most definitely the farthest person from okay on this ship. I’m pretty sure you’re almost certifiable.”
“Wow, okay. Rude.”
You fell into step behind Luffy, who fearlessly moved through the crowds of people. His eyes filled with childlike merriment as they hungrily took in the scenery around him, and what a scenery it was to behold.
You’d never seen a city quite like Loguetown. Everything was industrial; a majority of shops appeared to be inside actual buildings, with only a few random small stalls of merchants placed at random outside. There were cars and trolleys, which were something you’d only seen in magazines Kaya received at the manor. Syrup village never had use for trolleys or giant, elegant cement buildings that towered over the horizon. Each one housed sweet shops, finery of jewels with fabrics that ranged from silks to wool, meats, and ceilings full of lights and pops of color from hanging umbrellas.
Loguetown made you feel every bit the small village girl as you stepped through the archway and into the main square.
You weren’t so enamored with everything around you that it made you oblivious to the heat of Zoro at your back. The way his finger grazed the waist of your pants to remind you that he was there or moving too far ahead of him.
The last couple of places Luffy had the Merry stop at for supplies were nothing compared to Loguetown. Besides the abundance of Marines you were already seeing, the number of people in general was beyond what you were all used to.
Zoro’s anxiety must have been going into overdrive.
“There are so many people,” Usopp mentioned in awe.
He was equally as stunned as you were at the sheer size of Loguetown. You wanted to ask him if he was thinking about Syrup village, too. All the differences Loguetown had in the first five seconds of entry compared to the island you’d both grown up on.
Your group walked to the column that stood in the center of the entrance. Nami read off the plaque's engraving of “The town of the beginning and the end.”
“Well, that sounds ominous,” you grumbled.
You refused to let some weird engraved words ruin this moment for you. There were so many new things for you to see, and you were in charge of getting first aid supplies. A spark of excitement at all the potential a place like this had in introducing you to new medicines - new herbs - was palpable.
They were lucky Zoro had his index hooked in the hoop of your pants, or you might have taken off on your own.
“This is where it all started. The hunt for the One Piece. History happened here!”
God, why didn’t you expect Luffy to start yelling like an excited lunatic? Your captain was so radioactive in his excitement, his body vibrated with it. It still didn’t mean yelling like a crazy person, arms thrown wide to grab hold of the universe in a thank you hug, made garnering any extra attention less sketchy.
Every single one of you took turns glancing in every direction just to make sure no one was looking at you all a little too long.
“It looks like they’re having some kind of festival,” Sanji pointed out.
“Ooo, do you think they’ll have a parade?” You asked him excitedly.
Sanji would be willing to feed into your excitement, while Zoro, being ever the pragmatist, quickly piped up with, “For Gold Rodger’s execution.”
“You just have to suck the fun out of a good time, don’t cha?”
You loved this man. You really did, but sometimes…
“What?” He responded. The crease between his forehead perfectly matched the question in his eyes. “It says it right there on the banners.”
“I saw that.”
“Then why ask for a parade?”
“Zoro, darling, if you have to ask, it does not matter anymore.”
“A festival’s not so good for laying low,” Usopp pointed out.
The town, the sights, and the setting were overwhelming. So overwhelming that you hadn’t noticed Luffy had started wandering off until you watched Sanji give chase. He easily caught up with him and turned him back around towards the group.
“Then we’ll just have to be smart. No attracting unnecessary attention.”
The minute Luffy stepped back into the circle, he did so with his arm raised, as if someone would call on him to ask his vote.
“I want to see the execution platform!”
“Morbid.”
“What, no.” Luffy’s smile halted for the smallest millisecond before it resumed its usual place. “It’s where everything began, Doc. The story of the One Piece.”
“I caught that.”
“Sanji,” Nami cut in. “What if you take Luffy with you for some food shopping?”
“Mmmm,” Sanji hummed in approval.
Everyone understood the unspoken assignment.
“Food first, then execution platform!”
Nami was already digging into the depths of her purse. Her hands scrapping up the berry she had sectioned off with the purpose for each amount jotted down in her head. You wouldn’t be surprised if she knew how much berry was in each individual stack just from the feel alone.
“Right. Food will keep him out of trouble.”
“I am headed to the fashion district. Zoro, you need new swords, right?”
Zoro had stopped paying attention after Luffy brought up the execution platform. Nami saying his name brought him back into the conversation, but not before a hint of unease sent his eyes shifting between Loguetown and your group.
“I need money too.”
“Okay, what do you want me to do about it? Why don’t you ask Doc for money? She is your girlfriend.”
“Hey, wait a minute,” you butt in, voice taking full offense. “This money is for first aid supplies, remember? This isn’t “cover -for- a -sword,” money.”
“The cook got money?” He interjected, looking between Nami and Sanji.
“I’m buying food for all of us.”
“Me having more swords is for all of us,” Zoro shot back.
The annoyance rippled off him in waves as he stared over at Sanji. Sanji, on the other hand, looked completely undisturbed. At least he made a step up from waiter to cook, so that felt like a positive.
Nami’s own flash of irritation came as her hand dipped back inside her bag. A wad of berry, noticeably smaller than Sanji’s, was held in her hand. Zoro stepped forward, his hand already reaching to take it when Nami pulled it back at the last second.
“You take this, you pay me back. With 300% interest.”
“Can take the con artist out of the East Blue, but you can’t take the con artist out of the girl.”
“Hey, if you have a problem with it you can give him some of your berry,” Nami replied.
“Shutting up.”
“What if I need more?”
“You haggle?” Nami replied. She seemed genuinely confused. As if she forgot she was dealing with Roronoa Zoro, pirate hunter extraordinaire, but completely clueless about most basic life skills. “There’s a price they want and a price they will take.”
With the short lesson ended, Nami handed over the money to Zoro, who looked to still be processing what she’d told him. He glanced over at you and immediately stood taller. His fingers pushed the berry inside the pocket of his pants.
“Haggle. Fine.”
Usopp quickly added that he was going to be staying with Nami, using the excuse that a big city and a lone woman were a bad combination. You were tempted to remind Usopp that Nami was perfectly capable of getting into life-threatening situations like the rest of the Straw Hats, but decided against it. Why ruin it for the guy?
It was decided that once everyone got what they needed, you’d all meet back up here. You were just beginning to head down what you assumed would lead to medicinal shops when a familiar hand clasped around your wrist, stopping you short.
“Where are you going?”
The question wasn’t a demand. It was genuinely curious where you were going if he wasn’t about to follow.
“To get my portion of the supplies. Why?”
“I just thought-I thought you were going with me to look for swords.”
“Isn’t it said that a sword chooses its owner? You don’t need me for that.”
“But what if I want you there?”
The grip he’d held on your wrist transformed as he released it. His fingers trailed down the soft skin of your wrist until they came to the palm of your hand. Not grabbing or trying to hold, but softly suspended there. That way if you wanted to reach for him, as you usually did, you could.
You looked at this man who so blatantly adored you and couldn’t find it in you to feel anything else but gratitude for him. A man who only wanted to be your protector in more ways than one.
“Zoro, I’ll be okay.” You tried to keep your voice as soothing as possible and hoped it was working. “When I finish up getting my supplies, I promise I’ll come and find you.”
“How will you know where I’ll be?”
“There can’t be that many swordsmiths in Loguetown,” you pointed out.
“Good point.” The smile was small. It barely raised the corners of his mouth while he diverted his eyes from you to your hands that were still intertwined, but not. When Zoro finally looked back at you, he asked, “Come back to me?”
Four simple words, and yet, they held the sharpest meaning. You weren’t sure when it became the thing he’d say to you whenever there was a reason for the two of you to be a part. It wasn’t just four words. It was one of the last things you heard from him while he clutched you, iron tight to his chest as he ran with you back to Coco Village. A reminder of time wasted, and the lifetime you both promised to spend making up for it.
“Always.”
“I think I’m going to be sick,” Sanji grumbled.
“Shut up, Cook.”
You took that moment to move up on tiptoe and place a soft kiss against Zoro’s cheek just as you disconnected your hand from his. You all had things you needed to do before the day was over, and you didn’t want to waste the majority of your time not enjoying it.
So, the six of you went your separate ways with your promise to meet back in the center. It felt doable. It felt like today was going to be a good, normal, trouble-free day, because really, how much trouble could you all possibly get into?
Tag list: @tombraiderjones2505 @bbning @lyladoesart
As always, thank you for reading. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.
if ever you're going to continue CITB, may i pretty please be added to its taglist? 🙏
Hello. Hi! ☺️
I’m currently working on the newest installment for S2 and can most definitely tag you! I’ll be starting a brand new tag list for this season any ways just because it’s been a while.
Thank you for inquiring and for asking to be tagged! I appreciate it! Much love 🖤
I had two thoughts with the new season of One Piece 1) Hell yeah new season here we go! And 2) Omg please let there be more CitB!!!! 🪩❤️
You have no idea how flattered I am that when the new season came out you thought of CITB 😫😫😭 actually, I’m a little more than flattered. Grateful? Is that a better word 🤔 honestly, I’m not sure but I am awash with emotions that you (and so many others) remembered my two idiots and wanted to see what I did with it 😭😭
