omnia mors aequat

tormented pessimist that is trying to put their thoughts into words

[evendemonscryforus]

i wish i could tell my little brother how many times he saved me from being 20 forever.

[nixscriptum]

[evendemonscryforus]

i‘d rather take the blame than admit it was someone else‘s fault; i can‘t accept the fact that there was nothing i could‘ve done to prevent it.

[petaltexturedskies]

Jenny Slate, Little Weirds

[evendemonscryforus]

i miss you so much. it feels like you picked a part of my soul and took it with you when you left. i can‘t wait to get it back. i can‘t wait to get you back.

[evendemonscryforus]

and i will break apart for you a million times, if it means i can hold you just a little longer.

[evendemonscryforus]

fighting my illness with everything i have, so i can be his good girl forever

[evendemonscryforus]

i want to stop ruining everything i come in contact with

[evendemonscryforus]

i have tried my hardest to become everything you hate

[petaltexturedskies]

Louise Glück, from "Aubade" in Poems 1962-2012

[evendemonscryforus]

i hate that you are able to move on while i am still stuck in a memory of unwanted touch and burning rage.

i hate that it is so easy for you to fall in love with someone new while i am searching for another touch that hurts more than it helps.

you made living a nightmare, with and without you.

[evendemonscryforus]

i decided i was dead years ago

i just wasn‘t strong enough to finalise it

yet

[evendemonscryforus]

i still look at pictures of you so i never forget how you look like. i still love you and i hate myself for it.

[evendemonscryforus]

i am finally going to let my love and hate for you bleed out of my body

[evendemonscryforus]

i am actively destroying the body that protected me through my childhood.

when did i start hating the body that carried me through meadows and fields and let me climb the highest trees?

how can one unwanted touch destroy all the happy memories, all the love you had for your body?

[evendemonscryforus]

every time my heart misses you

i wish for someone to rip it out of me

and

squish it for so long i no longer feel anything

but pain

[evendemonscryforus]

i see you in every little thing because i still look for you.

i still search for the pain you made me feel