Everything Wrong With Sword Art Online

[everythingwrongwithsao]

EWWSAO Update

Yo it’s been 3 years since I shut down this blog. I haven’t visited it in almost 24 months, so it was a surprise to me how much endearing messages there are in the inbox. Some backlash, as expected, but mostly just nice comments from people who’ve discovered the blog while I’ve been away and enjoyed that their distaste for SAO is being validated.

So thanks for the nice words guys!

But now, there are some things I myself have to say. This not just for approving readers but also for the SAO fanatics who threw harsh criticism at this blog back when it was active.

Honesty below the cut.

Behind the curtains of EWWSAO You haters were right: Writing so much spiteful criticism every day and fighting with SAO fans was draining the life out of me. However, you lacked sympathy for me and what I was saying simply because I was saying bad things about a show you liked. It was a two-sided train wreck. You thought I was stupid and evil. I thought you were naive and blind. It was not a fruitful platform for anybody. But maybe we can understand each other better in hindsight. See, I DID really love writing criticism. I DID really enjoy posting and arguing. I never lied about that. In the middle of a harsh breakup with a lifelong friend, struggles in my long distance relationship and difficulties in finding treatment for my mental illness EWWSAO gave me something to focus my attention to. You could say this blog was my coping mechanism. Not a good one, not a healthy one, but something to pour my brain energy into. And because I never looked up anyone else’s comments on the show it felt like my criticism was important. It felt like I was important. And I got to drag on a show that my nasty friend liked. That’s what kept me going. I have not been the same after I quit - this blog changed me That might sound a bit too extra, but I’m not kidding. Before and during the runtime of EWWSAO critical view and analysis was what I lived for. I could watch a bad movie with a friend and go on for hours about its pros and cons, loving every moment of fruitful discussion. But after running this blog stopped serving the purpose my mind had given to it (aka. after I found out many other people have worded the problems with SAO more thoroughly than me AND without referencing the despicable dumpster fire that is CinemaSins) it drained me out so quick I had to quit it. It was a very good decision. I wanted to have some time off to get my critic energy back. But... it never returned.

To this day I have not recovered the bottomless analytical energy I had when I started this blog. It drove me crazy. “What is wrong with me? Why am I worse than what I used to be?” I looked back at this blog as a personal failure - something I left unfinished and didn’t succeed with - and as an enemy that stole part of my personality and never returned it. That’s why I tried coming back a time or two, but my inner workings had changed - I couldn’t. My understanding grew over time. Now I can see that my spirit breaking down wasn’t because of the blog, or SAO, or the hate, but because my critical energy was coming from a place of entitlement. “I am better, therefore it is my divine responsibility to point out the flaws others can’t see”, was perhaps not my exact thought process but on some level I felt like my criticism was needed. My life crumbling around me forced me to look at the errors in my logic. If I was so miserable, how could I be better than other people? If many others have pointed out the same things, why would my analysis be needed? The inner conflict forced me to change as a person. Painfully, but for the better.

Three years later Funnily enough, despite everything I still don’t feel any different about the things I’ve said on this blog. Kirito is still the worst, the abhorrent romance plot screams of Kawahara’s immaturity and the game mechanics make no sense. But these days I really don’t give a damn whether people see that or not, as long as they don’t hype the show in my face. SAO has become an ironic meme and I wouldn’t want it any other way. As what comes to my personal life, the friend that started all this by hyping this show was out of my life for a solid year before returning with apologies and a new start. I’ve built a whole new set of friends around the local video game community and we’ve started organizing events in several conventions. Building a growing following there. I’ve also put my graphic design skills into better use than taking screenshots of a bad anime in the form of doing posters for the community, heh.

What now? Will I be coming back? No, it’s obvious at this point. Will I delete this blog? No, as I still agree with most of its content and I want to preserve it as a record of this dramatic piece of my personal history. The messages from the past two years also confirm that there is enjoyment to be found in it for other people, so I’ll leave it here for them. Have I seen the SAO movie? No, but I saw the video Mother’s Basement made on it. That’s about all the time I want to invest on the matter.

I... somewhat want to know if the people who dragged me into furious arguments have changed over these years too. I’m eager to meet my old enemies and shake hands on the fact that whatever we raged war on is in the past now. I want to move on. But if you don’t share that concept with me it’s fine too, I won’t be checking in on anyone over this. I just want to say I don’t hold any grudges. (except against the person who said SAO can’t be criticized because it’s art. your soul will burn in the deepest parts of hell for the sins you have committed against this world)

See you. Be well. And don’t watch CinemaSins.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

Against my previous promises EverythingWrongWithSAO will not make any new posts.

Why, you ask? It is not because I would have admitted defeat. It is not because SAO fans would have convinced me there is nothing wrong with the show. As a matter of fact it's the very opposite: I have become a SAO hater.

When I started this blog I did not like SAO. It was (and is) a bad show. The characters are bad, the story is bad, and having good animation and soundtrack with decent gimmick just doesn't cut it. Before I wanted to reason it and I felt the need to bring these issues to light in an objective manner. And I still do, but over this time I have become more and more convinced of how - and these are my own words now - idiotically shitty Sword Art Online is. The heart-eyed fans are a disgusting contradiction to how bad the series is. Not just the show, but the entire franchise. It has become complete trash in my eyes and I think only a complete fool could claim otherwise. And a biased view like that is not good for this blog. EWWSAO will never become a hate blog even if I become a hater, and I rather stop having it than turn it into something ugly. If I someday can look at this garbage with more tolerance in my mind I might bring EWWSAO back to life, but for now this blog is dead.

I apologize to all of my followers for this. I apologize to everyone who have been anxiously waiting for more content. I am ashamed of having to do it like this, but it is the only way to keep EWWSAO as what it was intended - objective criticism blog.

Below the cut there is a list of posts I had planned. Smaller ones I did not include but the main points are there. If you want to write a submission about any of the issues, feel free to send it! I will check this blog to answer to questions and post submissions if those are to come.

Yet again, apologies.

Planned issues:

► A special post reasoning why Kirito falls into the category of a Mary Sue with an explanation of the trope as well as links to vaster sources (Mary Sue and Common Mary Sue Traits) ► Another special post about SAO villains, why their motives are extremely poorly planned out, why none of them is well written and how they all fall into different stereotypes. Also an explanation on why villain is as important as the main hero and hence its writing should be focused on equal amount. Kayaba and Death Gun might have gotten their own separate posts. ► A third special about supporting characters - Asuna, Suguha, Klein, Silica, Liz, Agil and partly Sinon. The post would have explained why these characters are not realistic or believable and the word "supporting" matches them well because they exist only to help Kirito along. ► A post about why Kirito and Asuna's love story is unrealistic and weak ► A post about SAO confusing real world and game world - not just the characters but the show itself not knowing the difference between real and virtual and why that is a real issue ► A post about Cardinal as a system and why it would be possible for new quests to be generated to ALO without human intervention ► A post criticising the antagonising that takes place in the show. (The Army, Salamanders in ALO and Sigurd were all unnecessarily turned into villains despite them being just people playing games) Alternatively this and the villain post would have been a bigger entirety, handling the issue of SAO’s cheap morality and unhealthy representation of good and evil. ► A post pointing out how out of place Kirito's "trauma" was in GGO plotline and another about how it was written in ► Another post about Kirito's morale in general and its inconsistency throughout the show ► A post about Yuuki, the nonsense of her illness and timeline ► Few posts about Yui - again ► Several posts handling the plot convenience of GGO's worldbuilding and how it contradicts with its own reality ► Several posts pointing out small plot convenient inconsistencies in the game world (potions, NPCs, dual wielding, pain and other senses etc.) ► Many, many posts about Kirito being an unique little snowflake - all of which would have been linked to the Mary Sue post as reference ► At least 5 more fanservice posts including a post about Kirito's avatar in GGO

[everythingwrongwithsao]

162: Kirito's ability to dodge and counter bullets was the only reason he was capable of using a sword as his main weapon against gun-users in GGO, but those abilities are simply given to him. He didn't earn them through rasonable ways - practice and learning. He is good with the sword thanks to SAO and his high reaction speed can be an excuse for him to be able to deflect bullets, but he had never had to avoid getting hit by machine gun shots (and do backflips while at it) yet he does it like a professional in his first battle against another player. Kirito being in SAO for two years is not a good excuse for acrobatic skills, because he never needed them back then. Claiming it is would be like saying everyone should be instantly good at driving a car if they’re experienced in cycling.

Kirito is also said to be the first player to be able to use the sword so effectively, because he is the first player to predict there people are about to shoot instead of simply looking at the prediction lines, while player like Pale Rider simply rely on their agility. Considering that GGO is extremely competitive game and predicting gunshots is basics in FPS’s of today as well it’s utter nonsense that his dodging and prediction skills would be on such unique level.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

161: “When have I ever touched you when you didn’t want me to, Titania?” *proceeds to grab her almost instantly after* (Trope: I Have You Now, My Pretty)

There are three purposes for scenes like this in the show: 1) To make the viewers hate the villain, 2) to give sense of urgency, and 3) fanservice. Since SAO is not directed at adults but more likely people of Kirito’s age (14-16) and younger, this kind of adult content in the show doesn’t only make the viewers hate Sugou as a character, but the writers and animators for forcing people to watch this. A 14-year-old is not going to find this kind of material sexually interesting - it’s simply gross. And the sense of urgency could have been kept alive with other ways too, if only Kirito wasn’t killing it constantly by getting sidetracked from rescuing Asuna.

This scene and many others where the viewers are forced to watch Sugou grope Asuna and her hair, lick her face and talk to her of the most indecent things should not have been in the anime. Sugou’s perversion could have been handled in a different way.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

160: Kikuoka was the one looking into the murders Death Gun had committed, but it made no sense that he asked help from Kirito. Not only had Kirito not played shooter games before and GGO was full of extremely competitive players, but asking a non-involved civilian to be a part of a murder-related investigation - friend of his or not - was not an acceptable thing to do. Since Kikuoka was willing to pay for the job, he could have hired a professional instead.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

What is the name of the SAO spinoff that was mentioned on your blog the one where they tackle every floor very interested thanks :)

It’s called Sword Art Online: Progressive.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

157: ALO doesn't have Sword Skills to begin with (before their addition in the following arcs), and the benefits to Dual Wielding in SAO was the OP Sword Skills that can apparently take down bosses. As for what happened in this episode? Who fucking knows? I tried going back to the novel once, and it doesn't make much more sense. The author's extra twitter commentary for the episode says ALO has left-over coding for Sword Skills as it's mostly a copy-paste of SAO, but that explanation is rubbish.

Issue no.157

Kirito used that attack with his and Leafa’s swords. Did he really need his massive reinforcement army if he could have pulled off a trick like that from the very beginning? Doesn’t make a very good plot to make an asspull like that, when nothing explains its mechanics or why the characters didn’t use it before the final possible moment.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

159: The whole conspiracy plotline in ALO was silly and unnecessary. The Salamanders and Sylphs planning to attack Sylph leaders to prevent their alliance with Cait Sith, Salamanders gaining portion of the territory's money and possibility to attack their towns for ten days - it's all just gameplay. No one is really in danger and Sylph players could just play with their alts for that ten days (or not play at all) if losing money and getting attacked was such a huge deal for them. The point is, compared to Kirito trying to save Asuna from an abusive man and arranged marriage was far more important and in comparison to that some squabbles between players meant nothing, yet they still wasted a lot of screentime on the conspiracy plotline and an entire episode was dedicated to Kirito fighting one of the Salamander players and preventing the "war". It's just a game.

What's even more bizarre about it is that at the end of S1E19 Kirito was going with Leafa only because they both happened to be going the same way out of the cave, Leafa even pointing out the whole squabble is Sylph business. However when episode 20 begins, he is teamed up with Leafa to fight the Salamanders. In between episodes the writers forgot the character's motives and the transition was extremely sloppy. The whole episode was just there for extra pats on the back for Kirito, getting him fight the strongest player in ALO and win for no reason and having some meaningless secondary female characters squeal over him for no reason.

As pointed out before, even though plotwise the meaning of that episode was to get Kirito allies that would help him beat the World Tree, their part was so poorly written the show would have been better off without them.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

158: Fanservice. There was no other reason to show Asuna bathing naked.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

for number 121 what do you mean dehydration doesn't pose any threat to the body? you can easily die from being dehydrated and sweating can cause dehydration but i see your point on how they could've just gave him water

Issue no.121

Dehydration could be compared to hunger in some ways. It can indeed kill you, but feeling hungry or dehydrated is not a dangerous sign. You can be absolutely starving after not eating all say, your blood sugar will be low, but if you’re a young healthy individual it cannot kill you.The reason Kirito’s dehydration cannot be fatally dangerous is because he hasn’t been in the game for very long, few hours at tops. He’s also not doing physical work and only sweating due to stress that takes place in-game. He’s in room temperature, which doesn’t pose a threat unlike heat or freezing cold would in the same conditions.Mild dehydration can cause headache, dizziness and nausea, but a bottle of water fixes that - it’s not something a nurse would make a worried face for. Kirito would have to lie there for a lot longer for his dehydration to be dangerous to his body.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

What made you want to start this blog? Did you enjoy the anime at first then thought " well there seemed to be a lot of plot holes" or were you watching it going "this is terrible"? Love reading your posts, keep it up

I’ve been waiting for someone to ask that actually. Here’s the story: (not really that long but long enough to put under a readmore)

I had heard contradicting things about the anime before I knew anything about SAO. Some said it was good and it was on “Top 10 animes to watch” -lists, but on the other hand I had seen a lot of jokes about how bad it was. I started to watch because I wanted to see for myself and decide.I watched first five episodes and then got tired, I wasn’t hooked but didn’t have an opinion yet. Later a friend of mine said they wanted to watch it for the same reasons I used to have so we watched it together - noticing the plot holes and anime nonsense that takes place. We liked GGO plotline the most, and we thought Kirito was most likable when he wasn’t in-game. He was most relatable outside his overpowered game-self. But neither of us liked SAO as a whole. We were both familiar with sci-fi, anime and storytelling beforehand. We saw the good sides and discussed about them, but laughed at the cons.

That was not enough to make me start a blog about it. The inspiration actually came from a rather silly source.

Afterwards I met two other friends of mine, both in their twenties like myself. I knew they had seen SAO so I told them I had watched it and was about to say what my opinion was, when both of them squealed “KIRITO~! <3″ and burst into fangirl mode. I tried to calmly explain them I was not quite on the same line as them and they got angry with me. How could I not like such an awesome show? Why do I have to look for flaws in everything? Things don’t have to make SENSE, it’s just a show! It doesn’t matter if the plot is bad, Kirito is perfect! Other of them was sincerely upset by my negative views and we don’t speak anymore. After doing some research I was astonished to find out how many devoted fans - people just like my two friends - SAO had despite the low quality in everything but visuals and soundtrack. I also saw people arguing about SAO’s bad sides, but no one seemed to do it appropriately. Everything was just baseless hate and they didn’t know what they were talking about. Every discussion was about the anime only, since most fans (and most haters) weren’t familiar with the books at all, hence why I decided to make my blog anime-only as well.I knew I had to be the one to do it right. My divine duty, my burden.

This was in April. I was preparing this blog for two months before I began posting in June. That time I spent writing down issues and rewatching the show, only to discover more. My motivation to keep a blog about it only grew over time so I knew I would be able to keep it up until everything was covered.

That’s the story of how EWWSAO came to be.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

157: Kirito’s dual wielding charge attack in S1E23 didn’t make any sense. The rainbow arrow which he used to ride through the mass of enemies was created by two different attribute weapons used at the same time (as suggested by the flash of Sylph and Spriggan symbols before the attack) but since dual wielding was only a remnant from SAO and not a real skill in ALO, such fusion attack should have been impossible. There was no reason to code in something like that if no one was meant to be able to dual wield to begin with. Even Kirito didn’t know about this so logically he would have used the swords like they’re intended instead of slapping them onto each other. If he knew attack like this was possible there was no reason for him to not use it before too, yet he didn’t.

► This post has received 1 ask.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

156: Even though in S1E4 Sinon thought Kirito was a girl based on his appearance, continuing pretending to be one and overacting girl-like manners was a stupid and impolite thing to do. Sinon didn't call Kirito a girl, so he could have just acted normal and allowed Sinon to find out her mistake naturally. Kirito approached her politely and didn't try to hit on her, so Sinon would have most likely helped him out even if she knew he wasn't a girl. Later on when the deception is discovered Sinon becomes reluctant to help him - and no wonder - but still continues to do so, so lying didn’t end up backfiring Kirito in any way even though it was extremely stupid thing to do.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

This is the first thing I've asked you on anon because I want you to post this. I just wanted to say I read your post 150 and wanted to say I really appreciate your blog. When I had first seen your blog I just finished watching Sao for the first time and I honestly thought "I hate this blog to no ends". And j had only seen one post so after I went and re watched Sao and when it got to the part I was wow they were right. So to everyone who hates this blog really thing b4 you say anything

This made me really happy, to be honest.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

154: Just pointing out this is a flaw of the anime; Episode 2 is taken from a spin-off series that's meant to cover the events of each floor on SAO, 1 at a time. In the spin-off (both manga and novel) Asuna continues to use the cloak even after that boss battle.

Issue no.154

That is true. The cloak is a little bait for those who were already fans of the franchise, but a meaningless detail for those who are introduced to SAO through the anime. Due to the chronological nature the anime failed to grab hold of many other themes too and everything is very out of place.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

155: If Yui’s core program is inside Kirito’s NerveGear, there is no way it would be able to exist if Kirito is not in-game, yet we are shown that it’s capable of far more than just that. Also it is not explained how Yui ended up in Kirito’s NerveGear. Already in S1E12 Kirito says Yui’s data should be in his console’s local memory even though it doesn’t make sense. If you meet a player or any other character in ANY game, their data will not be sent to your computer. Even if Yui was turned into an item in Kirito’s inventory, it would still not be in his console’s local memory because MMO characters’ information is not saved on your hard drive - it is in the server. If MMOs saved their character data on the player’s computer instead of the server, you could technically copy your character and give it to someone else. That’s why the data is not supposed to be in the player’s possession.

[everythingwrongwithsao]

154: Asuna had no reason to hide in a cloak in S1E2. The opening already spoiled what she looked like and once her hood is removed she never puts it back on again.

► This post has received 1 ask.