note: i’m reposting this in the wake of still getting stupid hate (a bit lesser now, thank goodness) racism, and people who continue to think it’s fine to tell someone to end their life. over a completely innocuous post. (repost technically). having this brought up again has made my already crumbling mental health worse. this is a post that i should have n e v e r taken down. i’m tired. i’m frustrated. i’m done. guess this is what i get for turning my inbox on again.
hello. it’s been a while but some things need to be addressed, i think.
about a month ago, i made a post saying: “hot girl summer? no, dummy it’s anguished woman autumn so are you coming to wander the moors with a lantern and a nightgown in the pouring rain or not because we leave at eight.”
for whatever reason, maybe timing or just it being october, the post completely blew up, which i have to admit, was very fun. it’s sitting now at 41k. but apparently, and very recently, that was suddenly not the case.
i began to receive a multitude of reblogs and comments accusing me of stealing from the black community, racism, and quite honestly the most outrageous of all, accusing me of faking my race. that i was actually a white woman pretending.
i don’t think i need to tell you how frustrating and anxiety enduring this was and still is. but apparently it needs to be said: i’m a black woman. i have a multitude of people on here who can attest to it. along with this, just because i am black, doesn’t mean that i’m into or know about everything within black communities, and the media that becomes part of the culture. i’m not on twitter or tik tok or whatever.
to play it fair, and to actually see what the problem was, i simply googled “hot girl summer” and to directly quote megan’s interview with the root she did earlier this year:
“It’s just basically about women — and men — just being unapologetically them, just having a good-ass time, hyping up your friends, doing you, not giving a damn about what nobody got to say about it. You definitely have to be a person that can be the life of the party, and, y’know, just a bad bitch.”
so basically entirely what i thought. just having fun.
but apparently by making such a post about autumn in autumn, i slandered the holy name of megan thee stallion. i’m not a fan of hers. i don’t listen to her music. but i’m fairly certain most people will agree with me that, fan or not, she isn’t Christ.
to add insult to injury, the dozens and dozens of black people i’ve had to block in the past days accusing me of being white because “there’s nothing on your blog that says you’re black” is staggering and extremely painful. maybe y’all enjoy putting every facet of your lives into the internet, but i don’t. and just because i don’t doesn’t mean i’m faking my race. even a blog who attested that i am a black woman answered an ask replying that “people jumped the gun, yeah, but there’s nothing on her blog saying that she is black and it’s white behavior” (in reference to my post). i immediately blocked this person who believes in such disgusting ideology. there’s no behavior that is attributed to a specific race, period.
case in point: this person acknowledging and then…refusing to accept?
i don’t think i have to explain how deplorable this kind of behavior is, but as someone who has dealt with this in real life, it’s terrible and (*gasp*) triggering as hell. sincerely, i don’t feel safe anymore during the day anymore. i’m going to bed at 5pm because i don’t want to be awake. i wake up panicked. my hands start shaking at random times. i can’t talk to my family about this. it’s not as simple as “log off” when it’s hundreds of people spreading misinformation and accusations. again, i’ve dealt with this in real life it’s come back with a frustrating intensity.
for any of those who follow these folks, i suggest you keep your distance, considering they find suicide and suicide baiting to be justified, the funniest thing in the world, as well their #FAVE, i suggest blocking, and quite honestly, if needed, reporting.
if you want to reblog, it’s completely fine. if anything, i encourage you to because i’m probably not the only person who has dealt with this.
ellievsbear
romaincrisis
tangentwithtanner
origamiaround