one stupid whore @failurejpeg - Tumblr Blog

i think my age group is just going to have to live with the fact that half of us are always going to be burdened by the glee covers. we’re never going to be able to listen to a bunch of songs without thinking of the glee version. i envy those who don’t have this curse. those who don’t hear rachel berry and finn hudson singing together in the background of so many songs, while mercedes hits a high note and kurt or puck sings a verse with one of the unholy trinity. those who can hear jump without thinking of the mattress commercial. those who can listen to a song as iconic as bohemian rhapsody and don’t have flashbacks to vocal adrenaline performing it at regionals intercut with shots of quinn fabray in labour. who don’t close their eyes at night and hear “this one’s for you artie!” vogue by madonna is forever tainted by “will schuester, i hate you.” i’m never going to willingly listen to run joey run but if i ever heard it in public i know that the only thing i’d be able to thing about is rachel’s terrible music video. there are people out there who are able to listen to rumour has it without hearing naya rivera as santana lopez cut in with lines from someone like you and you know she keeps glancing at brittany s pierce played by heather morris as her life falls apart. walking on sunshine played on the radio the other day and i was surprised when i didn’t hear halo mashed up with it and ALSO ANGELS. don’t even get me started on faithfully, any way you want it/lovin’ touchin’ squeezin’, let alone don’t stop believing. this show and all it’s covers are burned into my mind and i envy those who don’t face my struggle.

trinweisenbachfeld-deactivated2

since I’ve seen this being made for most fanbases—

gleegifs

lookathernow

glee 2019:

will schuester does the “in my feelings” challenge to prove to emma pillsbury that he is hip and not out of touch

sue sylvester tries to run schuester over recreating the “nothing breaks like a heart” music video

rachel sings “thank u, next” replacing the names with her exes (rip finn hudson)

the new new directions prepare for regionals meanwhile the old new directions attempt to reunite to record a spotify album

rachel and mercedes fight for who gets to do the ariana grande solo

there’s a new girl who sings every halsey song

santana, as their token hispanic, teaches them what reggaeton is and they have a reggaeton week where only white people (including schuester) perform “taki taki” and “despacito”

blaine and kurt break up for the 1,000th time. blaine sings a post malone song.

the entire group does a “bad & boujee” performance. the new couple in the new directions pretends to be cardi b and offset.

rose-puckerman

sue words = dumb meta

williamschuesterhateblog

anyone else feeling contempt for will schuester in this chilis tonight?

totallyabsurd

rampagebb

neo-soulless

Let’s revisit this historic read

lucytara

u know what’s wrong with tumblr now?? too many kids who weren’t here for glee. y'all have no idea. none of u understand the suffering we went through. the hell. the endless war. u come in here and u try to start The Discourse but u dont get that we already made these mistakes. we already had the discourse and its done now. its over. its all over and u should let it stay dead but u wont and that’s why we all hate u

chucktaylorupset

I was not here for the days of glee but please relay that fandom history

lucytara

its not history, its blood. i still see it all over this website. the vague posts. the deactivated urls. where do u think the word problematic became popular. where do u think the representational anger started. glee was the hungry gaping void that consumed us all. it said watch us and find yourself. there is someone for everyone. santana is a lesbian and kurt is gay and brittany is bisexual and quinn, god knows what quinn is, she’s straight but we have her say things like “you were singing to finn and only finn, right?” and artie is disabled. mercedes is black and our outlet for body positivity. we are all oppressed by something and we are different and we are outcasts and we are you.

and we fell for it. we watched glee and we related to its characters and we fought its wars until it was too late. until it was nothing but a distorted picture of a parody of reality, a cracked mirror in which our souls were sucked and encased in glass. finn outed santana but it’s fine because he had good intentions. sam was supposed to be gay but we’re bringing blaine anderson in for that instead. the q in quinn is for queerbait. brittany was maybe raped but it was a one liner so who really knows. will schuester was a horrible fucking adult and should never have been allowed to care for children. finn, the white straight boy, did everything wrong but it was narratively presented as right. we turned on each other. klaine vs kum and finchel vs faberry. santana fought everyone so brittana stans fought everyone. character vs character, ship vs ship, blogger against blogger. we fucking hated each other. there was no glee fandom. there were character fandoms and ship fandoms and that is it and our mottos were all fuck glee.

we won every popularity contest, every online poll. we voted our fingers to the bone. we created art and wrote fanfic and made such excellent photo manips they were published in newspapers. we were prolific. we were consumers of the hell we created and we just kept producing more in a fucked up dystopian fandom chain of supply and demand. don’t get me started on the rpf. dianna wore a likes girls shirt on tour and made a statement an hour later revoking it. some people still say heya is real but it’s like a breath of the wind, a sound so bare i can’t quite make out the words.

u asked for history. theres no history, only rage and pain and regret, the image of anonymous with a grey face and sunglasses telling u to kill urself because u thought artie was a dick for calling brittany stupid that one time. this website is a reflection of the hole glee left when it finished taking all it could from us, when the void could not consume anything more, and the posts on it now, the social justice “discourse” that is just giant piles of steaming, unsifted, unrefined shit is from those who refused to learn from us. the history is here and it followed us and we can never ever escape it.

fluent-in-lesbianism

orphanblaque

glee is the lesbian fandoms origin story

ninahobrev

YOU SUSPENDED MARLEY BECAUSE SHE DIDN’T PUT ON A SEASHELL BIKINI AND PARADE AROUND A STAGE BECAUSE SHE DIDN’T WANT TO CHANGE HERSELF FOR A MOTHERFUCKING PERFORMANCE AND GOOD FOR HER

BUT YOU COULD MAKE YOUR GLEE CLUB PERFORM A COMPLETELY UNPROFESSIONAL AND NOT FIT FOR SCHOOL SHOW LIKE ROCKY HORROR BECAUSE YOU WANTED EMMA TO LIKE YOU

YOU STUPID HYPOCRITICAL LITTLE FUCK

thorffour-deactivated20190920

add your own!!

nebulous-bounds-of-bad-taste

Blaine deciding to transfer from his elite private school to some nowheresville public school so he could be with his boyfriend and his parents were never even mentioned

thorffour-deactivated20190920

mascmantis

when tina knocked her head on the bottom of a fountain and woke up as rachel

tibby

this is the funniest 8 seconds of television that has ever aired like this show was something else

iwilleatyourenglish

do you know how many people are involved in making tv shows

do you know how many people this line of dialogue went through who thought it was fine

murphels

if Hamilton had come out during the Glee Era, this is what the episode basically would be

- Opening scene: ND in the classroom talking among themselves. Schue walks in wearing full period costume. Everyone is confused and a little ashamed. Schue tells them he’s discovered they’re all failing history, and one of them tells him history is just SO BORING.

- cut to a scene of somehow all the kids in the same class in various stages of unconsciousness while a Professor Binns type teacher drones on about the war of 1812.

- Schue assures them history is TOTALLY COOL, informs them about Hamilton, tries to white rap his way through either Guns and Ships or Yorktown. Santana makes that “why am I surrounded by white fools” face that she always makes. Hamilton is the assignment this week, even though COMPETITION looms in the future, but when have they ever actually practiced before the week of?

- Blaine has been super friendly with some guy from Dalton or from Hairgellers Anonymous or something, is constantly liking his posts on FB. Kurt sings “Burn” over a montage of Blaine ignoring him in ridiculous situations that no one would ever be on their phone during.

- Rachel has decided this week is one of the weeks where she’s aggressive about becoming a star, sings Satisfied.

- Tensions are getting high, so Artie flawlessly white boy raps through “What’d I Miss” while Mike dances, to lighten the mood.

- The kids are learning about Hamilton, but Schue is worried they’re not REALLY learning the point he’s trying to get at.

- Probably the Unholy Trinity sings “Schuyler Sisters”

- Schue walks back in on the kids excitedly talking about the show and/or history in general. Smiles that smile he smiles when he thinks he’s a good teacher. “See you guys? History is now. You’re the founding fathers. You’re the underdogs. Your time is coming, you just have to wait for it.”

- New Directions: YEAH!

- The group sings “Wait for It” in the auditorium either in full costume, or wearing just vaguely matching outfits. Finn takes lead, but Mercedes comes in on the middle solo.

- They all smile at each other at the end, while Schue makes that face again.

- Sue is in the background glowering that ND has managed to not fall apart yet again.