Holy Interplanetary Yardstick, Batman

chirp chirp cricket noise yes it is I a very real human man chirp chirp nothing suspicious here please carry on

[memegod]

[welcometoyouredoom]

[ahmallama-deactivated20240604]

this is like a group chat

[mwagneto]

and they were comrades

[starked]

[gif87a-com]

[eevonb]

sound up.

[geekyjessica]

This is one of the funniest goddamn things I’ve ever seen.

[chandalftheblue]

I’m losing my god damn mind

[srsfunny]

Masha The Hero

[asryakino]

They forgot the part where the ambulance actually stopped to let the cat in

[booty-uprooter]

oh good I was worried

[dr-dendritic-trees]

What a good cat. What a kind cat. How can anyone not love cats they are so good and loving.

[squibbbly]

they also forgot the part where they only found the baby because masha was screaming her head off bc she knew this baby was in danger. she went around outside the alley the next morning and yelled at passerby until she got one to follow her to the baby. she kept him warm all night and then made sure someone found him. she was adopted after this bc she was a stray and is in a loving home and is a hero

[pon-raul]

Hero cat

[goaliesarethebest]

Thank you, Masha, you’re such a good girl.

[floppyschoice]

the cha cha slide in full metal armor

[floppyschoice]

“sliiide to the left”

*indescribably loud screeching of metal against asphalt*

[floppyschoice]

“one hop this time”

*clonk*

“two hops this time”

*clonk clonk*

[floppyschoice]

“everybody clap your hands!”

*clankclankclankclankclank*

[snakeybones]

Ask and ye shall receive ft. my drunk ass Any other requests? Send ‘em my way! 

[beggars-opera]

this is peak fucking comedy

[the-bluespirit]

John Mulaney Wins Outstanding Writing for a Variety Special for John Mulaney: Kid Gorgeous at Radio City

[keldachick]

[carbonfiberpersonality]

Southerner: oh man, there’s snow!1!! Guess we better uh… Not do a driving! *Drives 10 mph while sobbing*

Northerner: *driving a stick shift 80 mph in slick iced roads while eating a full cheese plate and blaring led zeppelins’ “immigrant song”*

[anz100]

I’m Californian and I have the balls to do this.

[hexpress]

californian found dead wearing a murrsuit in a 2003 honda civic after encountering black ice for the first time and careening off of I-95

[wadey-wilson]

[newdsm5xl]

solidarity

[nottwilightbella]

a multiverse of the same problems

[laughingsquid]

Friend Makes a Woman Hospitalized with Short-Term Memory Loss an Informative FAQ

[fuckinglesbian-deactivated20170]

reblogging for the last one

[splickedylit]

if i was a shapeshifter, half of my time would be spent making myself look androgynous and trimming up the things about my shape I’m not happy with, and half of my time would be spent making my teeth look just a little bit sharper than is normal, changing my eye-color subtly between slightly unsettling shades, and giving myself an intricate “tattoo” that just barely moves every couple of hours, until it’s in a whole new shape next time you look at me.

[antique-scarecrow]

#i waNT TO BE AN ELDRITCH BEING WHOSE ONLY GENDER IS “ATTRACTIVELY DISTURBING”#IS THAT SO HARD GOD?!?!?!?!?!

[catsofinstagram]

[dykecosette]

1-800-ARE YOU ffflllllufflflfflllfSLAPSLAPflflluffflallffSLAPPING

[catsofinstagram]

[dykecosette]

1-800-ARE YOU ffflllllufflflfflllfSLAPSLAPflflluffflallffSLAPPING

[bysaestyl]

its 6 am and i should be asleep but please look at this absolute gem i found in youtube comments:

[lenaoxton]

[omega3]

[bloodbending]

god tier childhood cartoon anthems

> danny phantom theme song > My Shiny Teeth and Me by Chip Skylark > sweet victory from the bubble bowl episode of spongebob

[mysharona1987]