WELCOME TO THE MARGARITAZONE.

joseph christiansen of ddadds. written by bre. est. 8/3/17.

[faithlessfather]

the christiansen family definitely owns a bougie-ass stroller that costs more than the rent on most people's apartments bc they would

[mini-tyrannosaurus]

Two sides of Joseph Christiansen. Whatever you think of him, he’s a good dad, ok.

Also I don’t consider the ‘secret cult ending’ to be canon because come on. That’s just. Dumb. But if YOU do (I dun judge) then his third side would be killing ppl and being a demon. But seriously. A demon? Come on. As if it’s not enough for him to be a closeted homosexual who is afraid to divorce his wife because of what would people think and oh, he is also a youth minister and his father was the “real fire and brimstone type” which is probably where all his problems stem from. But no, let’s reduce him to just being a stupid demon. Rant over.

[may-goth-be-with-you-blog]

PREACH 👏

[faithlessfather]

❝ you are weak and hollow and it doesn’t matter anymore. ❞

his  head  is  hung  low  ,  eyes  trained  intently  on  one  particular  stain  upon  the  worn  ,  old  rug  beneath  his  feet  .  it's  rugged  and  rough  ,  long  past  it's  prime  ,  not  unlike  the  man  who  owns  it  .  he  wonders  if  that's  the  reason  the  other  man  can't  bring  himself  to  throw  it  out  ,  or  if  it  simply  doesn't  occur  to  him  that  it  ought  to  be  replaced  .  

his  words  hit  a  little  too  close  to  home  ,  like  pinprick  daggers  right  to  the  gut  ,  and  he  feels  the  corners  of  his  lips  pull  downward  in  a  pronounced  frown  .  he  doesn't  say  anything  ,  at  least  not  at  first  .  long  fingers  pull  his  polo  over  his  head  ,  the  stench  of  sweat  and  sex  and  booze  still  embedded  in  every  fiber  .  spotted  stains  from  spilled  drinks  dot  his  collar  .  he  wonders  if  he  has  a  spare  shirt  in  his  car  ,  or  if  it  would  even  be  worth  it  ——  after  all  ,  mary  made  it  quite  clear  she  knew  exactly  where  he  was  going  .

he  could  fire  back  with  his  own  assessment  of  robert  ,  of  his  own  selfishness  and  determination  to  run  from  his  problems  .  his  HYPOCRISY  at  holding  others  to  a  standard  or  morality  he's  unable  to  meet  himself  .  but  if  he  did  ,  he'd  be  no  better  ;  there  are  few  sins  worse  than  adultery  .

❛❛  if  that's  really  how  you  feel  ——  ❜❜  he  stands  ,  khakis  wrinkled  and  rumpled  ,  and  fastens  the  buttons  of  his  polo  without  meeting  his  eyes  .  (  he  has  to  button  it  all  the  way  to  the  top  to  hide  the  dark  ,  angry  marks  mottled  over  his  neck  .  )  ❛❛  ——  then  maybe  we  shouldn't  do  this  anymore  .  that's  what  you  WANT  ,  isn't  it  ?  ❜❜  his  voice  is  even  ,  but  there's  the  barest  hint  of  a  bite  to  it  .

❛❛  don't  waste  your  time  showing  me  out  .  i  know  where  the  door  is  .  ❜❜  without  another  word  ,  or  a  second  glance  ,  he  gathers  the  rest  of  his  things  .  he  feels  the  shame  creeping  up  his  spine  as  the  door  swings  closed  behind  him  .

a  heavy  sigh  shudders  out  of  him  as  he  slips  into  the  driver's  seat  .  he  deflates  ,  forehead  pressed  against  the  worn  leather  of  his  steering  wheel  .  now  that  he's  alone  ,  he  realizes  how  sore  every  inch  of  his  body  is  .  he  can  feel  fresh  bruises  along  his  hips  ,  his  thighs  ,  his  ass  .  and  he  knows  robert  was  DELIBERATE  with  it  .

robert's  sweater  is  still  crumpled  up  in  the  passenger's  seat  ,  and  he  goes  instinctively  to  wring  it  between  his  hands  .  the  fabric  is  soft  and  warm  ,  and  in  spite  of  everything  ,  he  finds  himself  bending  forward  to  sniff  the  fabric  .  

he  has  no  intention  of  giving  it  back  .  /  meme  !

[graveword-deactivated20180221]

                                         SPOILER ALERT : HAMILTON DIES.                                         INDEPENDENT & CANON DIVERGENT                                   ALEXANDER HAMILTON | MUSICAL BASED                                             loved & cared for by : em 

[faithlessfather]

❝ you wanted happiness, i can’t blame you for that, and maybe a mouth sounds idiotic when it blathers on about joy but tell me you love this, tell me you’re not miserable. ❞

'  tell  me  you  love  this  .  tell  me  you're  not  miserable  .  '  

the  words  rattle  around  his  ribcage  ,  chest  constricting  with  the  w e i g h t  of  them  .  can  he  say  them  ,  in  truth  ?  (  LYING  is  a  mortal  sin  ,  after  all  .  )  can  he  be  happy  with  this  ,  even  if  it  isn't  what  his  heart  desires  ?  he  LOVES  his  children  .  he  loves  his  job  .  he  loves  his  WIFE  ,  too  ,  even  if  he  knows  ,  deep  down  ,  that  he  doesn't  love  her  the  way  that  he  SHOULD  .  it  should  be  enough  ,  but  he  knows  deep  down  it  isn't  .

❛❛  there  are  times  in  our  lives  where  we  have  to  do  what's  best  for  OTHERS  ,  not  just  ourselves  .  ❜❜  it's  not  an  answer  ;  he  can  only  hope  it's  enough  adjacent  to  one  to  appease  him  .  he  doesn't  think  he  can  take  it  otherwise  .  doesn't  think  he  can  withstand  the  probing  questions  ,  the  far  too  astute  observations  .

maybe  if  he  knew  him  a  little  less  ,  maybe  if  he  didn't  care  for  him  so  much  ——

there's  another  version  of  him  ,  he  thinks  ,  that  might  have  let  this  continue  .  that  might  have  been  able  to  stomach  the  thought  of  it  ,  unfair  as  it  would  be  to  him  .  it  wouldn't  be  the  FIRST  time  he'd  felt  the  twisting  ,  aching  guilt  of  an  affair  ,  and  it  had  certainly  never  stopped  him  before  .  

❛❛  i  love  my  family  .  i  have  to  do  what's  right  for  them  .  ❜❜  /  meme  !

richard siken sentence starters.

quotes are all taken from various poems out of richard siken’s poetry book crush.  feel free to change pronouns/etc if needed.

❝  tell me how all this, and love too, will ruin us.  ❞

❝  tell me we’ll never get used to it.  ❞

❝  there are so many things i’m not allowed to tell you.  ❞

❝  i swallow your heart and it crawls right out of my mouth.  ❞

❝  i want it back now, baby. i want it back.  ❞

❝  i’m sorry. we know how it works. the world is no longer mysterious.  ❞

❝  that’s a nice touch.  ❞

❝  i like him and i want to be like him.  ❞

❝  i’m sure you remember, i was on the phone with you, sweetheart.  ❞

❝  history repeats itself.  ❞

❝  there are many names in history, but none of them are ours.  ❞

❝  you could drown in those eyes.  ❞

❝  but damn if there isn’t anything sexier than a slender boy with a handgun, a fast car, a bottle of pills.  ❞

❝  sorry about the blood in your mouth. i wish it was mine.  ❞

❝  i couldn’t get the boy to kill me, but i wore his jacket for the longest time.  ❞

❝  you wanted happiness, i can’t blame you for that, and maybe a mouth sounds idiotic when it blathers on about joy but tell me you love this, tell me you’re not miserable.  ❞

❝  there is no way to make this story interesting.  ❞

❝  i want to tell you this story without having to confess anything, without having to say that i ran out into the street to prove something.  ❞

❝  tell me we’re dead and i’ll love you even more.  ❞

❝  you will be alone always and then you will die.  ❞

❝  i’m sorry i came to your party and seduced you and left you bruised and ruined, you poor sad thing.  ❞

❝  who am i? i’m just a writer. i write things down.  ❞

❝  i take it back.  ❞

❝  here is the repeated image of the lover destroyed.  ❞

❝  you still get to be the hero.  ❞

❝  what more do you want?  ❞

❝  love, for you, is larger than the usual romantic love. it’s like a religion. it’s terrifying.  ❞

❝  no one will ever want to sleep with you.  ❞

❝  you know that recently we have had our difficulties and there are many things i want to ask you.  ❞

❝  you had not expected this.  ❞

❝  walk a mile in my shoes.  ❞

❝  a man takes his sadness down to the river and throws it in the river but then he’s still left with the river.  ❞

❝  you are weak and hollow and it doesn’t matter anymore.  ❞

❝  hush, my sweet. these tornadoes are for you.  ❞

❝  that sounds overly valorous.  ❞

❝  do you love yourself?  ❞

❝  i don’t have to answer that.  ❞

❝  you wanted more.  ❞

❝  i had a dream about you.  ❞

❝  there’s nowhere to go. there’s nowhere to go.  ❞

❝  in these dreams it’s always you: the boy in the sweatshirt, the boy on the bridge, the boy who always keeps me from jumping off the bridge.  ❞

❝  will you love me even more when i’m dead?  ❞

❝  you didn’t show up. i kept waiting.  ❞

❝  i swallowed crushed ice pretending it was glass and you’re dead.  ❞

❝  i don’t really blame you for being dead but you can’t have your sweater back.  ❞

❝  you can sleep now, you said. you can sleep now. you said that. i had a dream where you said that. thanks for saying that. you weren’t supposed to.  ❞

❝  hello darling, welcome home.  ❞

❝  please keep him safe.  ❞

❝  i just don’t want to die anymore.  ❞

❝  you want to die for love, you always have.  ❞

❝  you didn’t think you’d feel this way.  ❞

❝  you saved my life. i owe you, i owe you everything.  ❞

❝  please, just for one night, will you lie down next to me, we can leave our clothes on, we can stay all buttoned up.  ❞

❝  you’re all i ever wanted and worth dying for, too.  ❞

❝  drive into that tree, drive off the embankment. ______, make something happen.  ❞

❝  we are not dirty.  ❞

❝  you keep singing along to that song i hate. stop singing.  ❞

❝  here is the sink to wash away the blood.  ❞

❝  this is not harmless. you are not breathing.  ❞

❝  i will come back from the dead for you.  ❞

[whittledscars-blog]

condoms don’t protect you from spiritually transmitted demons.

aesthetic board for @faithlessfather

[whittledscars-blog]

❛❛ you believe in GHOSTS and VAMPIRES but you don’t really believe in yourself do you?? ❜❜

                                 indie && private && selective                                    robert small from ddadds                                        penned by grayson                                        under construction

[faithlessfather]

◞    ◦    ⁀    ✧    robert.

@faithlessfather

                     a  loud  knock  startles  robert  out  of  his  sleep  and  he  jolts,  rolling  off  the  couch  and  hitting  the  ground  with  a  THUD.  he  groans,  squints  against  the  light,  and  tries  to  push  away  the  pounding  in  his  head.  for  a  moment,  he  seriously  considers  ignoring  the  knock  on  the  door.  or  slamming  his  head  into  the  coffee  table  until  he  went  unconscious.  maybe  that’d  make  the  headache  go  away.  or  at  least  give  him  something  else  to  worry  about.

                    another  knock  and  he  groans  again,  pushing  himself  to  his  feet.  

                    ❛  jesus,  i’m  coming,  i’m  coming,  ❜  he  shouts.  ❛  hold  your  fucking  horses.  ❜

                    the  door  swings  open  and  robert  opens  his  mouth,  a  harsh  retort  on  the  tip  of  his  tongue.  and  then  he  gets  a  good  look  at  the  man  standing  in  front  of  him.  blonde  hair.  one  blue  eye,  one  grey.  charming  smile.  'good  boy’  polo  shirt  and  pressed  khakis.  

❛  holy  fuck.  ❜

he  doesn't  remember  when  THIS  became  his  tradition  ,  doesn't  remember  when  '  joseph  christiansen  ,  the  preacher's  rebellious  son  '  became  '  joseph  christiansen  ,  youth  minister  and  block  captain  '  .  somehow  after  a  lifetime  of  struggling  against  this  he's  gotten  swept  up  in  the  current  of  life  ,  and  without  even  realizing  it  ,  he's  become  his  father  .  

well  ——  ALMOST  .  there  are  still  a  few  aspects  of  his  life  that  jonathan  christiansen  had  never  approved  of  ,  right  up  until  the  day  he  died  .  and  a  few  more  that  joseph  had  done  everything  in  his  power  to  make  sure  his  father  NEVER  knew  about  at  all  .  

the  pie  he  holds  is  warm  in  his  hands  ,  the  sweet  aroma  of  cinnamon  and  apples  wafting  up  from  the  pastry  ,  as  he  knocks  firmly  against  the  carved  wood  of  his  neighbor's  door  .  then  the  door  swings  open  to  reveal  a  familiar  chiseled  face  framed  by  SALT-AND-PEPPER  hair  ,  and  for  a  split  second  ,  he  feels  the  smile  on  his  cheeks  falter  in  shock  .  but  only  for  a  moment  ;  joseph  is  too  PRACTICED  at  pretending  to  slip  more  than  that  .

❛❛  oh  ——  !  ❜❜  but  the  smile  slips  upwards  ,  touches  his  eyes  in  an  expression  that  borders  on  mischievous  .  ❛❛  well  ,  if  i'd  known  you  were  my  new  neighbor  ,  i  would  have  brought  more  than  just  a  pie  .  ❜❜

[ddaddsmasterlist]

        HELLO RESIDENTS OF MAPLE BAY !    ╾╾    can you do us the favor of reblogging this post if you roleplay a character in the DDADDS RP COMMUNITY?    when you reblog,    please put who your character is in the tags !         of course,    OCS AND MULTIMUSES are welcome to join the list as well !    If you’re an OC, state so in the tags !    If you’re a multimuse,   please let us know which character you write as !         BUT THAT’S NOT ALL, FOLKS !    if you have a DDADDS VERSE, you’re more than welcome to reblog this as well !    just be sure to put something along the lines of ‘ddadds verse’ in your tags !                                      PERSONALS    ╾╾    DO NOT REBLOG.

[faithlessfather]

                             ❛❛ some people claim that there’s a woman to blame,                                        but i know it’s MY OWN DAMN FAULT. ❜❜

               indie & private joseph christiansen of ddadds. written by breanna. est. 8/3/17.                                               ( under heavy construction. )

[eelpatrickharris-deactivated202]

You know what I really want? Joseph and Mary getting a divorce, but staying friends afterwards. I want Mary coming back to the house for family movie night and actually enjoying it. I want Joseph hiring a babysitter so he can go barhopping with Robert and Mary sometime. I want them to go on a family vacation, but sleep in seperate beds and split the bill at the end. I want them to take the kids out on the yacht, and when they aren’t wrangling the little boogers, talk about how their seperate lives are going.

They obviously enjoyed each other’s company at some point, considering that they got married in the first place, so why couldn’t they be that way again when they aren’t pressured by their relationship?

[faithlessfather]

so i have no idea what i’m doing or who anyone is , does anyone feel like recommending me some people to follow ?

[faithlessfather]

                             ❛❛ some people claim that there's a woman to blame,                                        but i know it's MY OWN DAMN FAULT. ❜❜

               indie & private joseph christiansen of ddadds. written by breanna. est. 8/3/17.                                               ( under heavy construction. )

[faithlessfather]

TAG DROP