“The things I say to and around my roommate” sentence starters
Have fun. Don’t die. Don’t kill anyone.
The coffee table bit me again dammit!
I’m sorry that I woke you up by setting the smoke alarm off by cooking bacon but I’m definitely not sorry enough to give you any.
Welp, there goes my hopes and dreams.
Welp, there goes my hopes and dream: wet and dirty.
Keep your dirty socks from invading my dirty sock kingdom!
This donut’s for you- the other eleven are for me.
Of course they gave two bars of chocolate! One’s for me, the other one’s for future me!
I wonder if I can buy the sweet embrace of Death at the store.
*giggling* They’re freshly harvested potato people.
What is this gross stuff falling from the sky?
My hands are as cold as my heart right now.
My toes are turning purple and honestly I don’t know how to feel about this.
Look at my lobster socks!
No, ice cream! My socks do not want you!
Your butt makes a good foot warmer.
Suplex me to space and call it a day.
