âStrange women lyinâ in pondsâŠâ and other Dennis the Anarcho-cynical (not a typo) Mud-Farmer quotes notwithstanding, Iâd like to think the Lady of the Lake would select the new âRightwise King (Monarch) Born of All Englandâ by providing something better than a mass-produced and discontinued Spanish SLO.
Maybe this was a trial (though not dry) run - if so, Matilda and her Dad should get back to Cornwall / Kernow ASAP.
Although on second thoughts, last time a Matilda laid claim to the English throne there was civil war and anarchy. In fact there was THE Anarchy, which made for a good novel by George Shipway (âKnight in Anarchyâ, what a surprise) but by all accounts wasnât a lot of fun otherwise.
(The ârightwise king born of all Englandâ business was on the Sword in the Stone (and anvil, everyone forgets the anvil) which apparently wasnât Excalibur at all. A war memorial, perhaps, as T. H. White suggested. What the Lady of the Lake was waving about was a different sword entirely, and the really important bit was its scabbard, which granted invulnerability, or undefeatability, or a reliable broadband signal 24/7âŠ)
Maybe the one in Dozmary Pool was lost during some Arthurian re-enactment - or maybe it was deliberately chucked away by someone whoâd hoped for something better on their birthday, because when I saw what Matilda foundâŠ
âŠI recognised it as thisâŠ
Noble Collection sells movie merchandise nowadays, but back then they sold decorative wall-hangers (SLOs - sword-like objects - is the less kindly term) made by Marto of Toledo among others, with frequently-spiky fantasy blades, ornate cast pot-metal handles and ooh-shiny! gold plating. However their version of âExcalibur" - itâs there on the cover - looked sensible enough to feature in the TV movie âThe Librarianâ.
Though the catalogue calls the sword found by Matilda a âmedieval two handed swordâ itâs based, more or less, on a Renaissance âFederschwertâ sparring blunt (the flare above the guard was balance-compensation for not having a full-width blade.)
Not especially Arthurian, whether Arthur was Clive Owenâs Romano-Sarmatian, Oliver Tobiasâs Dark Age Celt or Nigel Terryâs High Middle Ages Anglo-Brit.
Apparently there are now also synthetic Federschwert from various sources.
At least they wonât rust when chucked into ponds. The Lady of the Lake likes low maintenance as much as anyone elseâŠ
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