Fictional Wasteland

[d1rtypaws]

Me: I love being out at night, I’m not scared of the dark!

tree: *exists, looking very vaguely like a person*

Me:

[casanova-lives]

[hijerking]

me @ myself at 6pm: okay i’m going to bed early today

me at 2am: haha pranked

[wombshaker]

[opalescentboy-deactivated202106]

Is he... you know... ???

[hofessorx]

The little gay run I do across the street that makes driver's wanna hit me

[petitbourgeoisiedeathsquad]

[bemylova]

i😡😡😡😡😡wanna😡😡😡😡😡cuddle😡😡😡😡😡and😡😡😡😡😡😡watch😡😡😡😡😡spooky😡😡😡😡😡movies😡😡😡😡😡with😡😡😡😡😡you😡😡😡😡😡

[kitty]

he watch over da plants for eternity, please sacrifice ur treats to appease the mountain god

[jauregxis]

[bob-belcher]

Who needs Meghan Trainor’s “NO” when there’s this masterpiece?

[vampirezigzagoon]

I THINK YOU COULD USE A MINT

[shezasag]

this is literally honestly a fucking bop

[bopeep]

[cumnog]

my grandma has a dog like this….

[123dayzup]

Ya grandma a hoe

[sprousetwinsblog]

[delnortewest-deactivated2023022]

[dearbisexual]

so i went to paris once on a school trip n my absolute favorite thing to tell ppl about paris is that ppl piss in the streets there and you can’t step in puddles b/c there’s a good chance it’s a piss puddle and alleys reek of piss

[dearbisexual]

someone: oh wow, you’ve been to paris/?????? what’s it like????

me:

[dearbisexual]

that’s why i can’t stand french ppl who get uppity online b/c i KNOW how they LIVE

[dearbisexual]

this is the saddest thing ive ever read….. mayb im just a country mouse but openly pissing in the street (when there’s accessible alternatives) is grounds for an ass beating

[warplanerubdown]

This makes a little more sense now.

[meme-loving-stuck]

the french got to this post,

[forsakenlouie]

[sirfrogsworth]

I… kinda think that could work. 

[whitepeopletwitter]

[jurassic-parks-n-rex]

[bvttcheek]