*insert witty comment here*

Hello! My name is Blanca. Texas. Euphonium. Yang. Follow my yin @ thestoryofmysocalledlife

[groake]

…. I don’t fear God, but I do fear the automatic stapler in the staff room

[vongolacielo]

“fuck”

[synille]

That small but heartfelt “fuck” brings this whole video together. 

[inkskinned]

some stuff isn’t just a trope, you know? in the movies, we’re introduced to women who are “experts” who have trained for years, who live and breathe and are willing to die for whatever the male main character has never even experienced before. and then he takes the reigns and upstages her, instantly, with a little bit of friendly bewilderment because, come on, it’s not antifeminist, he’s just good, he’s standing there having shown he’s actually more powerful than she’ll ever be - and we buy it. and then we go home and when we live and breathe something we still ask ourselves. “am i actually good at this? or is some fool going to walk into this presentation eighteen minutes in and offer a sarcastic and biting correction?” we wait for the man to show up and prove that, despite awards and training and an excellent job position, we’re actually just secretly incompetent.

the trope isn’t just setting up for us “this man is good at what he does” – the fact that the trope demands our male hero upstage the woman says: even an incompetent man will always be better than the best woman. he could have upstaged the sage boss or whatever other male in power exists in the movie. but he doesn’t. he upstages the woman to earn his pack order because she is, intrinsically, the weakest link. the real fight will be man against man. it always is.

and i wish, i wish it stopped outside of the theater. but the number of men who try (gently) to assure me that they’re actually better at what i have multiple degrees and years of experience in - it tells me it worked. men are always looking to be the hero, to interrupt, to upstage, to flip the woman on her back and expose her to all your fellow men - see! for someone who has been doing this forever, she’s just another woman. i am reminded by a man this is called mansplaining. i said “it’s a system of silencing women” and he said, “no, it’s just an accident.” in the movie, he sees himself pointing to my equation on the board, having just walked in. “here’s the flaw,” he says. in the real life, i’m too frustrated to speak. in the movie, he’s inevitably right. elle woods flipping her hair and saying what, like it’s hard? was a funny line. it’s funny because in every other movie, it’s said by a guy.

[heartbreakclubs]

i want your love and i want your

constant reassurance that you still love me

[wev]

do u ever just see a boy…. and you’re like.:… wow…..i wouldn’t mind if he kissed me………

[korolevx-deactivated20180128]

good one Neil we’re gonna start an interplanetary war after the aliens discover we named their planet Dopey

[willow]

[kingjaffejoffer]

“im getting old” starter pack

“this is way too sweet”

“they’re remaking that movie already????”

“my back hurts”

“wait, people get mad about that now?”

“I can’t eat that, its gone fuck my stomach up”

“hold on let me check my calendar first”

**turns on the radio** [groans]

[thuggums]

How dare you EXPOSE me at 5:18 am on this good Monday

[zerofucksclub]

[fiftyshadesofblanca]

luke skywalker: hi i'm luke skywalker i'm here to rescue you! And this is my friend Han, he's amazing and He DROVE Me Here

[roseys-deactivated20181203]

IM CRYING

[ruinedchildhood]

[hatin]

I wish i didn’t care i wish so much but i care i care so fucking much 

[baetology]

Sometimes it blows my mind that there are people that don’t wear glasses/contacts. Like they can literally see with no aid. Like they wake up and just be out here seeing. What a wild concept.

[bumblebeebats]

And people say stuff like ‘lol don’t you hate it when you look up in the middle of the night and see a spider on your ceiling’ like bitch (!!) i could have Nicholas II last czar of Russia hangin from my ceiling fan and i would be none the wiser

[just-shower-thoughts]

I feel like an adult brain in 2017 processes more information in one morning than an adult brain in 1817 did in one month.

[vagabonds-and-troubadours]

yeah thats why we all have anxiety now

[okaymad]

[gallusrostromegalus]

See I’ve seen like 600 variations of this meme and I gotta tell you a Story.

The year is 2012.  It’s Christmas.  It’s the first year my sister and I are both home from college, and we’re feeling kind of nostalgic, so we take out the old family photo albums to remember everyone from times past.  We’re all on the couch or the floor with hot chocolate and the Dog is curled up under the tree.  It’s all very Norman Rockwell.

We’re going through my Mom’s side of the family, laughing at the pictures of Grandma putting wrapping paper on the dog, and grandpa pulling faces at the camera, when we find an old brown envelope.

“The fuck? says my sister, because she’s been in to Great-Aunt Liz’s Rumballs, and I open the envelope.  Inside are four tickets to the titanic, unused, and Mom tells us the story of how her ancestors ALMOST came over on the Titanic, but Great-Aunt Liz got the measles and forced everyone into quarantine, thus saving their lives.

The OTHER thing in the envelope are seven Photographs, dated 1890.  They are of my Great-Great Grandmother.

They are nudes.

They are NOT tasteful nudes.

Like, these are Violating-Terms-Of-Service-On-Most-Platforms- OBSCENE.

GGG had these taken waaaaay back in ye olden days, in order to convince her wayward husband to move back to England after he ditched her to party it up in Chicago.

I CANNOT TELL YOU HOW FUCKING HARD WE LAUGHED.  Like, I think I passed out I was laughing so hard.

So yes, people have ALWAYS been like this, and your nudes will make for a hilarious family Christmas someday.

[nishthedish-deactivated20181218]

Another hilarious reminder that, no matter how fancy we believe the past was, humanity has always been nothing but shitposters and lewd motherfuckers since time began. And it is hilarious.

[hashtagloveloses]

WHAT AN ICON

[linuxusers]

[millennial-review-deactivated20]