[eremitical]

i think we shouod terraform earth to make it completely flat because itd be fun

[eremitical]

i meant completely smooth but flat it actuwlly funnier

[tonysaintborgi]

new flat earth thearoy: we could do it

[kosmogrl]

they should invent a january that doesn’t make you go through every emotion known to mankind every day

[rylandsgrace]

Barbie (2023) // The Good Place (2016-2020)

[afterword]

idk who needs to hear this rn but suffering is not noble. take the tylenol

[wahoo-shem]

One time when I was younger I was refusing to take headache medicine and my mom said “the person who invented that medicine is probably so sad you won’t let them help you” and now every time I find myself denying medicine I just imagine the saddest scientist making those big wet eyes like “why won’t you let me help” and whoop then I take the medicine

[lmaonade]

society is jumping the gun big time why the fuck are we developing AI and robots and shit brother we don't even have printers or vacuums that aren't dogshit CAN we dial it back

[membraneshock]

rip to all the “fuckyeah___” blogs that carried our society at one point </3

[fuckyeahcoelacanths]

[knifefightscene]

[machine-saint]

we justifiably give Biden a lot of shit but I think "at least 3" is the funniest possible response to some right wing dipshit asking you how many genders there are

[zackisontumblr]

do you ever sabotage your own free time? like wtf is that about? i want to play this game or read or do something specific but instead i will just stare out the window or scroll mindlessly???

[poetry-protest-pornography]

[tlirsgender]

The poll feature really took off because it taps into tumblr's favorite activity: being extremely opinionated about things that don't matter

[dragonprincessmew]

[replicated]

i think i speak for most of us when i say i've accepted i'm just going to be using tumblr until it either shuts down or i die

[flopryn]

Except I don't use it for weeks at a time, then pop on and reblog a dozen posts and disappear again...

[localrobosexual]

literally fuck companies that don't want their employees to act "unprofessional" in front of customers. I'm at a five guys rn and the employees here are joking around calling orders back and forth to each other and saying things in weird voices and laughing with each other while they work. Someone just came in for their shift while I was waiting for my food and was greeted by the whole kitchen with a secret handshake lookin thing. It was so silly and cute I love seeing ppl have fun at work and I know my food's gonna be bomb bc the ppl there are having fun with each other. Let employees be people and friends and have fun what is the issue!!!!

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

So I was once actually collecting data in a frozen river, and another guy fell in, filled up his waders and everything. He was wearing cotton (we were floored), and I had the car keys so I was like “alright, I’ll walk you back to the car to make sure you’re okay. Then you can strip down in there and get the heat going. There’s a blanket to wrap up in.” And he looked at me like I was insane. He said, “what? I’m fine.” I informed him that actually, if he stayed outside in subzero temperatures, soaking wet, in cotton, he was Licherly going to Freeze To Death, and he was like, “it’s not the 1800s lmao.”

And then while the guy in charge Forced him to go back to the car and strip, I had to stand there in a frozen river absolutely bewildered by the implication that a Wildife Biologist thought hypothermia is like, an old timey disease that people stopped getting at some point.

[partywithponies]

You know the biggest loss of the decline of physical media and the rise of streaming? DVD special features.

[partywithponies]

I love you DVD commentaries I love you making-of documentaries I love you behind the scenes footage I love you bloopers I love you deleted scenes I love you silly little videos of the cast dicking around 💖

[chocolate-and-discourse]

Sorry, I could never be a capitalist, I suffer from “wanting humans to have their basic needs met” disorder, where I care about people who aren’t me.

[chocolate-and-discourse]

Someone once asked me if, assuming we got universal healthcare, I would be okay with the rise in “healthcare tourism” where people who are sick come to our country to get their medical bills taken care of and life-saving medical treatment cheaper than in their home countries. I was just like, yeah thats fine, I’d actually prefer it if 0 people died from preventable causes kept behind a paywall for no reason.

[spoopy-valkyrie]

“even the addicts?” yeah dude did i fucking stutter

[caffeinefreedietbepis]

i 100% would have been diagnosed with hysteria back in the day

[cosmicanger]

Trans people: Hey please don’t buy this game.

Cis people: What if I bought it, but also donated some money to charity?

Trans people: No thanks. Please just don’t buy it.

Cis people:

“More and more I’m starting realize that many people see “charity” as a store where you buy goodwill from strangers. Like “being a good person” is something you can purchase with money”