I wanna talk about how secure Yuder is in his relationship with Kishiar in the 2TL, and why it is all because of the safety net created by Kishiar in a world that condemns their love.
In Turning, one of the most remarkable developments is not merely that Yuder and Kishiar find their way back to each other, but that they do so within an emotional framework built entirely on safety, dignity, and trust. Kishiar doesn’t simply love Yuder; he rebuilds the very conditions under which Yuder allows himself to love. The security Yuder displays in the second timeline - his calm, his lack of shame, his unflinching ownership of their relationship - is the direct payoff of Kishiar’s careful, deliberate work.
From the start, Yuder is not someone who trembles under judgment. He doesn’t care what others might think of him. The world’s disdain is something he has long outgrown. What he does fear, however, is what others might think of Kishiar.
Yuder’s love is shaped by reverence and self-denial. He can bear ostracism himself, but the idea of tarnishing Kishiar’s name, of being the cause of his downfall, is unbearable. His instinct, born of loyalty and guilt, is to protect by erasure: to hide his feelings and to ensure that his affection never harms the one he loves. ( Yes I know he has several other reasons to hide his affection. Yet you cannot deny this isn't one of them.) That restraint isn’t shyness. It’s self-sacrifice. Kishiar dismantles that self-effacing instinct with finality.
“Being with you can never be a disgrace to me.”
- Kishiar doesn’t say he will endure disgrace; he refuses to acknowledge its premise itself. In that single line, he unravels the logic that once made Yuder’s love impossible. Their relationship, he asserts, is not something to be borne in secret but something that carries its own inherent dignity.
Kishiar’s reassurances are never hollow words. He embodies them. Every invitation to dance, every public acknowledgment, every dismissal of noble gossip is Kishiar gently prying apart the bars of the cage Yuder built around himself. Yuder, who has learned to survive by utter silence and invisibility, is slowly being told that “You can exist. You can be seen. You can be mine, openly, and that will never diminish me.”
And Kishiar never does it recklessly. He doesn’t push Yuder toward exposure to flaunt power or to claim ownership; he does it to normalize Yuder’s presence in spaces that once excluded him. Each time he asks Yuder to dance, it’s not to show him off, but to show the world that there is nothing shameful about him.
That creates an extraordinary emotional safety net.
Even when his actions serve political strategy, the tenderness beneath them is undeniable. He ensures that Yuder understands, regardless of context, that there is truth in his wish to shout to the world that Yuder is his.
Kishiar’s consistency becomes the foundation of Yuder’s transformation. He does not demand trust, no, he earns it.
Little by little, Yuder begins to internalize that steadiness. He learns that loving Kishiar is not a danger he must manage, but a right he can inhabit. When Gakane and Kanna eventually learn of their relationship, Yuder’s response is the payoff of all of Kishiar's efforts -
“I kissed him because I wanted to.”
No shame, no hesitation, no blush, no self-consciousness. The admission is as easy as breathing for him.
Yuder, who once would have hidden his feelings now stands unbothered and at peace. He does not need to defend their love; he exists in it, certain that it harms no one.
Kishiar’s greatest gift is not protection in the conventional sense, no, it’s freedom and dignity in their relationship. He builds a safety net so sturdy that Yuder no longer fears falling.
Through patience and unwavering affirmation, Kishiar transforms Yuder’s self-effacing devotion into secure love. He replaces caution with confidence and guilt with belonging.
When Yuder finally speaks openly, without flinching, Kishiar’s efforts are fulfilled: Yuder no longer loves with fear.
