WE ARE IN NOIR.

now let go of me... kwon arabella // north // main dancer of wish “i had to go away and live my life.” — daphne du maurier

[fmdxarabella]

durifmd​:

       he giggled softly, nodding his head. “i think i can do most stuff, besides for science! i would be no good in a lab setting!” he admitted, giggling just a bit more because he couldn’t help himself. math was never duri’s favorite, but it wasn’t something that he had fully struggled with, to say the least. it was probably all the practice and studying that he put into it, just to make sure he understood it. being attentive in class when they were learning it as well was probably rather helpful too, so there’s that. he really just tried his best. he nodded his head as he listened along to her words. “it’s nice having things that can only be solved in one way, it’s almost… easier, i guess you can say? but, that’s what’s funny about art, there’s not one right answer. even with the songs that we sing, there’s not one right meaning behind it because it can be perceived in any way, based on how you’re feeling at the time,” he said, shrugging softly. he chuckled softly, “ah, good! thought i was a bit rusty on my math skills,” he responded. it had been a while since he’s last done math, to say the least. duri nodded his head, “society makes you think that you have to get your degree at a certain age and you can’t do it any later, but that’s not true. you can get your degree whenever you see fit and whenever you want,” he said with a confident nod. he nodded his head, “i think there’s a lot of good in the world, but i’d like to make it better in my own little way.”

“i think living on mars could be possible,” he said, chuckling softly. “i wonder what that would be like… would dogs be able to live on mars? i don’t think i’d be able to go if dogs weren’t allowed,” he admitted, giggling once more. “ah, you’re going to have to give me some more time with that one…” he said, it was going to take a lot to go over his head. but, as he paid attention to the arrows, he did his best to go over it in his head. the song would come to an end, and he’d blur out his answer a moment after. “is ab 12?” he asked, head tilted with a tone that was rather unsure.”

“your loss,” she commented flippantly, unable to relate to the rest of duri’s comments. “that makes no sense and it’s incredibly stupid. how can you say that? we need right answers or else the world won’t make any sense. how can you live in such disarray? i’m assuming that you’re insane for saying all of those things. besides, there is a right meaning behind a song. my meaning. the meaning i had in mind when i wrote that song. but i don’t write songs. i’m just saying that in general.” there it was, her infamous stubbornness and unwillingness to accept opinions that were not the same as hers. “eh you could be better. like you could try to be faster. how the hell don’t you see the numbers right in front of you? but it’s probably because you never do any math,” obviously, she had a streak of arrogance too. “isn’t that the motivational speech that they save for all those who’re too stupid or lazy to graduate? you do have to get your degree at a certain age. if the rest can do it, then why couldn’t you? it just proves that you’re not even trying,” at least she had a justified reason. she couldn’t just leave wish. “of course it’s possible, you silly. elon musk said that we could live on mars and the first people will land on mars in 2024. i’d really love to be one of them and i don’t know if dogs could live on mars, but i assume that it’ll be possible. however, that doesn’t concern me much. all i can think about is the fact that if you get married and have children on mars, you’ll have little martians. isn’t that amazing? my children would be martians.” while funny to others, arabella had to say that it had a nice ring to it. “and that’s correct. but again, you need to work on your speed. i’d give you a B, just because i’m nice today.”

[fmdxarabella]

durifmd​:

     he giggled softly, nodding his head, “i definitely wouldn’t be a scientist of any sort!” he reassured, his head still nodding a bit. “i think i had only become good at it thanks to study and practice. but, i can see why you and others can enjoy it so much, it always has a right answer. whereas a lot of other stuff, there isn’t one right answer for it, and more so how you perceive it. much like literature and stuff like that, where it could be perceived in different lights.” he says. he nodded his head once she questioned, before he goes over it in his head. his fingers moving a bit as he constructed the problem within his head to solve for b. then, he got it. “b is 4.” duri responded to be the question. he giggled softly with a nod, “that’s true, would be unethical. even then, a lot of people do get their degrees later in life when they want some change, so just remember that you have a lot of time left to do everything that you want!” he reassured. by the time he was done being an idol, duri would probably end up being a writer and stay-at-home father, the perfect after idol life job for him. he smiled a bit more, “thank you! i think i wanted to be a nurse because i really like to take care of people? and wanted to take care of people because i’ve been taken care of by people around me for a majority of my life. i thought it was a nice thought to be able to do something like that,” he said with a nod. “thank you! i’m really glad it came true as well.” 

“maybe we’ll have another one with new technology that’ll always be talked about?” he said, before giggling a bit softly once more. “ah, i’m not entirely sure if i can do math and dance at the same time, but i guess i can try? i’ll be like singing and dancing at the same time, yeah?” he said, focusing on the arrows more. 

“yeah, i don’t think that you’re fit for the field of science, but that is all right, we all have different talents,” she noted, meaning no offense. “that’s right. i also like mathematics because there appears to be no obvious correlation between the actual construction of mathematics and reality, and yet, it has provided the most successful model of our universe. besides, i love knowing things, not just having stupid guesses offered to me. isn’t it wonderful when you can just offer a theorem and not only is it true, but it also can’t be solved in any other way? brilliant. i think that’s why i was never particularly good at literature. it’s foolish. why can’t you just tell me what you mean? why must everything have a secret connotation?” to her surprise, he did answer her question, with astounding assurance too. “hey you got that right. i thought you wouldn’t get it. but still i’m not impressed. that was easy. however, that’s sweet when you say it like that. that i could get my degree later in life. i actually like that idea. i’ll see how it goes,” and she offered him a smile, thankful for the unexpected reassurance. “that’s nice. like giving something to the world in return. pretty noble if you ask me. maybe that’s why i also wanted to be a scientist. it’s sweet to know that perhaps you can make the world a better place for others.

“ maybe we will. i wonder where technology will take us in the future. i think it’d be so fun to live on mars. i hope that elon musk will take me with him, but i don’t think that bc would let me go,” despite everything, she wasn’t joking, stating only her dearest wishes. “yeah yeah, next question! if a and b are positive integers and (a^(1/2)b^(1/3))^6 = 432, what is the value of ab, duri?”

[fmdxarabella]

fmdtaejin​:

the tears start, and suddenly he’s left in a state of disarray.

pushed back, there’s silence that overcomes the hesitation that pulls his eyes wide open and mouth half-agape by the time they yank down to the petite frame nuzzled against his chest. he hadn’t meant for his actions to come across, no. never has been tainted with bad intentions, just fueled by the properties of a fervent storm inside the lanes of fashion. “i’m sorry.. i’m really sorry.” it stammers out, jumbled and smeared in rampant words — no pause, he just holds her closer. “i didn’t want to make you cry.”

it’s honesty, that free-falls from his lips, caught in the middle of palms tapped against her back. slowly and sturdy — the rhythm keeps on when his chest becomes a concave for the deep breath he heaves in. “no hands in your closet, i promise.” taejin adds, for a split-second his hands slipping off her and straight into a i-come-in-peace palms up. “mini-bags and lip glosses, i’ll leave that as your territory consider my doings done and never to be heard of again.” it’s a concession when the tinges of his voice lilt into an octave of earnesty, void of any reservations locked in. 

perhaps, it’s the game of cat and mouse without the thrills of a chase — instead, it’s a tug-of-war where he’s yanked from one place into the next (he’s happy she holds the reigns to his motions, satisfied it’s with a woman who paints his heart whole).

“i don’t think i’ll ever create a clothing brand, so best to separate me from me and rihanna, i guess. however, i will say — i won’t second-guess your clothing choices.” taejin offers consolation in the form of his smile, the edges of lips quirked upward in one swift of a cheeky smile paining from the strain. “i just want to style you in case we ever go public — besides, your favorite kanye always dresses kim. so, why can’t i?” it’s a pop into pop-culture, superficial headlines he’s skimmed across from long-ranging van rides (he sounds unintelligent, he knows. but also knows arabella knows him better to pick up on the one-two cues of humor.) “forget about that though. no chairs, i like your bed — how about we cook a meal and sit in bed instead… doesn’t that sound better?”

“it’s okay, taejin. i know you didn’t. i’m not even crying anymore,” perhaps it was a moment of weak judgement. but at the same time, it was genuinely heart-warming to know he cared so much, enough to drop everything else and come calm her down. it felt almost unfamiliar. strange. she was used to being rejected in her family. dismissed. that’s why she never cried much. it meant nothing to those around her. “like i said, it’s okay. i think i’m just relying too much on these newly discovered powers. it’s great when you can just start crying and then get what you want.”  

“still, i just wish you had said something prior to this. i felt like a deer caught in the headlights. i know you meant no harm,” she looked up at him, eyes now clear, showing no signs of redness or puffiness, a clear telltale that she didn’t see it as a serious issue. at least not enough to keep crying. there truly was no reason to keep dwelling on it much longer and the sudden string of apologies only added more oil to the fire; now she began to feel guilty. 

“you won’t ever create a clothing brand? what are you talking about, taejin? i think you’d be an impeccable designer. besides, i’d love to wear things with your name on it. just imagine,” and she certainly did. “in case if we ever go public? well why didn’t you just say that first? now i get it. you’re right. and i do want you to style me. i want to be like those couples that wear matching clothes and look so good together. okay, taejin. you have my full permission to dress and style me,” she pridefully announced, picturing herself posing for editorials and endless photoshoots, in taejin’s arms or of course right by his side.  “mhm that does sound better. so what should we prepare?”

[fmdxarabella]

durifmd​:

      “i always wanted to be sure that i really understood the information and the topics, so i would study often to make sure i had a high level of effort at school,” he said, not to mention the fear with his memory that he had after losing memories of his parents after the accident. he chuckles softly, “i think i just wasn’t a really big fan of having to do all of it within my head and the amount of time that you had to do math. i always thought math within science was a bit easier… i’m not entirely sure why, but i still managed to do well in math,” he explained with a soft shrug. “ah, a theoretical physicist? that sounds like an interesting job and like it would keep you on your toes often,” duri said with a soft nod. “have you ever thought of just doing it one day, just to see? though, i’m sure it would be a bit hard with wish’s schedule,” he spoke. “i always wanted to be an idol when i saw a girl group on music bank on the television when i was seven in 1998, so that had always been my goal. but, when i had auditioned, i was just about twenty-one, and had already did my mandatory military enlistment, so if i wasn’t taken because of my age, i was going to go to college for music, early childhood education, or nursing. i wasn’t sure yet, but bc was my first entertainment company and they accepted me right away. so, i guess it worked out in the end,” he explained. duri didn’t really speak much about the “if he didn’t debut” possibilities, but it was nice to talk about the other ifs if his idol dreams didn’t come true. 

he chuckled, shaking his head, “i witnessed all of it, but i still didn’t manage to hear of that, oddly enough,” he said. he nodded his head, listening to her explain the concept. “ah, yeah, at that point, there wasn’t a lot of education on science, especially in computer science. so, it was a theory on not knowing much about computers at the time, yeah?” he said. there was a giggle that left his lips. “can you?” he said, before he would begin to stomp quickly on the arrows on the platform that popped on the screen. 

“well that sounds nice. you do sound like a smart man, definitely not like a scientist, but still smart,” was it strange to value and judge people based on their knowledge? perhaps, but it was the only way she  knew thanks to her upbringing. “actually that’s why i love it so much. math is for most complex and requires thinking, but i feel so calm when my head is filled with numbers. it’s reassuring to know that each problem has a solution in math, which can’t truly be applied to real life. but i am glad to be in the presence of another excellent mathematician. would you like to make this dance even better? well would you be up for a mini test? if 4b+5=1+5b, do you think you could solve for b?” she questioned, not expecting to be taken far too seriously at the moment.  “i would honestly love to try it, i’d even pay, but i don’t even have a degree and that would most definitely be unethical. perhaps i’ll give it a try once i’m done with wish. i’m still young so  — i have time,” she nodded and for once stopped talking, listening with a strange sort of curiosity as he spoke and gave her a slight glimpse into his life. “early childhood education or nursing? wow that’s ... that’s actually unbelievably fitting for you. i think you would’ve made a fine nurse. you see to have that je ne sais quoi. a different sort of gentleness. well in the end, i am glad your dream came true.”

“i guess it’s more of an american thing. i first read about on some forums, but at this point, no one really seems to mentione it anymore. and yeah, you got that right. that’s one way to describe it,” she noted, eyes focusing on the on the luminous arrows on the screen as he feet began to move. “yeah, of course i can, duri. would you like another equation to keep it fun?”

[fmdxarabella]

durifmd​:

      he nodded as he listened to the words. to be honest, it was the first time he had heard something of the nature, so he found it to be of the interesting nature. most people that he knew during his school years weren’t big fans of examinations in anyway. duri can’t say he was either, but he did do rather well on examinations nonetheless. “i did pretty well in school! but, that was because i studied a lot to do well on my exams. though, i can’t say i was a big fan of math… but, i did well anyways! i even did really well on the college entrance exam. though, i never actually used my scores…” he said, shrugging softly. “did you take any entrance exams?” the older asked curiously. he laughed softly, nodding as well.

he nodded his head, “ah, it was wasn’t it? it really was fun seeing how quickly things were changing. when i was a teenager was when things were really changing. i couldn’t imagine being a child in the middle of it all changing so fast,” he said. “i don’t think i had of that? what was that all about?” he asked, clearly curious about it. “let’s go for it!” 

“that sounds reasonable and besides, most things do require some effort, so it’s naturally that you had to study. but i do get that a lot, the same old ‘i’m not a fan of math’ response. it’s truly fascinating how most people struggle with something that’s so logical. math is simple, but physics is better. it’s fun and exciting and there’s always something new that you can discover. i sometimes wish i were a theoretical physicist, but dance will always be my true love. anyways, no, i never took any entrance exams. i didn’t need to nor did i have a chance to take them. but that’s probably one of the few regrets in my life. not because i want to enroll into a university, but because i think it would be great to put my knowledge to test,” she concluded with a disheartened tone of voice, unable to hide her disappointment.  “considering the fact that you actually took an entrance exam, did you ever have any other aspirations in life? other than being an idol?”

“well at least you had a chance to witness it all. but wait you seriously don’t know? i’m shocked. basically with the new millennium just around the corner, many people were expecting an apocalypse. there was also the problem in the coding of computerized systems and many feared that it would destroy all the computers and wreck havoc in the world. but you know, people always come up with wild theories due to lack of proper education, especially in the field of science and,” she paused for a moment, realizing that she was talking too much again. then finally, the song began. “i could talk and still beat you.”

[fmdxarabella]

fmdtaejin​:

his eyes debate between the pink hues of tweed, the texture enough to draw itself to chanel, and the repetitive logo play of dior during the tones that grow louder with each quick glance from his left to the right. (maybe, that should’ve been his cue to stop mid-way, but he’s decided to take his chances and press his luck by continuing). 

he brings his lips together, no response back — just the hums of his voice, playing the background noise. “i’m helping you, you’ll thank me later. i swear!” defensiveness rides on the tip of his tongue, when he tosses the response quick and short in tandem with another piece of what he assumes to be jacquemus. “this is an all day thing — i thought i’d look at your closet to see what you’ve been wearing. still, all i come up with is alexander wang and jacquemus? why would you buy jacquemes?” this time, he pauses. staggered steps backward when his brows knit together before the tussle of humor forces the edges of his lips to quirk, laughter catching the tail end of his words.

“rihanna also owns many many hermes bags, not just birkins.” it comes as a mumble into her ears, the lazy drawl of his voice no longer stepping close along any touch of seriousness when his chin falls to rest along her shoulders. “and i’ll call this a project in progress — an hour of fixing up your closet, and the rest of the time is dedicated to us.” his smile peeks higher up into the apples of his cheeks, arms forcing a steadiness when they wrap tighter around her.

and when a yawn slips past his lips, it’s another tick that adds into the end of a growing project, fatigue slipping in. “you win — i’m stopping for the day even though you should be thanking me for picking through this mess,” he jokes, soothing into his bits of happiness. “now, what do you want to do? all my time is going to be tunnel-focused on you.”

“you’re not helping me, how are you helping me, taejin? you’re basically saying that i can’t dress. do you know how awful that sounds? i’ll kick you out later, i swear,” she mumbled the last part under her breath, trying her hardest to conceal the boiling bits of frustration in her voice and chest, and just like that she began to cry. one tear after the other, rolling down her checks, prompted by his seemingly selfless actions. that was life with arabella; in one moment you were being kissed by the sun and in the other, forced to escape the oncoming tornado. 

“i don’t care that it’s an all day thing. you’re leaving my closet right now and for your information, i have many items of clothes that do not belong to alexander wang and jacquemes brands, you’re just apparently blind. another thing is, well jacquemes is pretty popular these days and their mini bags are actually pretty cute. you just don’t know what it’s like to carry around a mini purse just for your lip-gloss. you should try it sometime. besides, gigi hadid modeled for their brand, so where’s your invitation for their shows, mister?”

but despite the sudden outburst of emotions, she calmed herself in a matter of seconds, continuing to talk as if nothing had happened. sometimes all you had to do was talk it all out. even the anger.  “you’re not on rihanna’s level, taejin. once you come up with your own clothing brand, you’ll be allowed to talk about miss rihanna,” she quipped, furious at herself for giving in to the urge to wrap her arms around him. but he was always so soft to touch. “why do you want to style me? i’m not against it, but i wish you could give me some sort of explanation.”

still with some defiance in her tone, she averted her gaze and said, “well i don’t know. maybe you want to decorate my apartment too? throw out a couple of chairs and the bed?”

[fmdxarabella]

durifmd​:

      “ah, do i do that? sorry, i think it’s a bit of a habit,” he responded, a soft shrug seemingly leaving his shoulders. he was probably a bit of captain obvious some of the time, a habit that he couldn’t seem to break. “ah, did you do well in school then with the examinations? what was your favorite subject?” he asked curiously. he giggled softly, shaking his head, “you don’t need to go easy on me, i promise!” he responded. truth be told, didn’t really care if he won or lost. that’s just how he is. 

he giggles a lot this time, head nodding towards her words. “i was born in 1990 and dance dance revolution came out in 1998, i believe? so, you’re right, it’s been a long time,” he responded, with another small giggle. “don’t worry about me, i’m full of energy and i don’t tire out quickly!” he said. “would you like to make the first song choice?” 

“yeah you do, but i don’t mind. i just thought it was interesting. so you don’t have to apologize,” words were after all only air, sounds that only humans gave meaning to. “of course. i loved exams. they were my favorite part of going to school. they were actually fun and a great way to test your own knowledge and also show others just how much you actually learned. but of course, my favorite were the surprise tests because you truly had to rely on your knowledge— and when it comes to the subject, well most definitely physics and math, because you know those are real sciences. not something stupid like english. however that has me wondering — how did you fare at school?” at the following remark, she only laughed, pondering whether or not he would end up changing his mind. “all right then. it’s your wish.”

“wow, that’s... truly a long time ago. well it must’ve been fun to be a kid during that time, seeing all the new things being invented and waiting for the new millennium. also did you ever hear about the computer flaw, the so-called "millennium bug," that created so much anxiety and the Y2K scare?” she questioned, head overflowed with extensive knowledge and unnecessary facts. “well let’s test that theory! and sure. what about dynamite rave?”

[fmdxarabella]

durifmd​:

        the arcade was apart of his childhood, especially thanks to growing up in the nineties and early two-thousands when it was all the rage. it was simply the best hang-out spot for kids, to play games against each other, and see who would come out on top. duri’s favorite was always dance dance revolution and the basketball game, as well as the plushie machines - that was probably all he really played when it came to arcade games. it was a nice relaxation to have, which was one of the reasons why he was seeking out to play dance dance revolution on that day. 

he nodded his head, “yeah! dance dance revolution is a lot more fun with more people!” he said, giggling softly. he giggled once more, “i may not be a dancer, but i promise i’m a good challenge in dance dance revolution!” he said, before leading the way to the machine that was close by. he wasn’t entirely sure if he’d actually be able to win, since she might be a bit quicker due to being a main dancer. but, he’s had decades of practice in the game - ever since it’s release in 1998. 

“i mean, i don’t really see a point in stating the obvious, but i guess it’s just the way you talk,” arabella noted as she began to follow him, disregarding every single notion about her words being a little harsh. “you don’t have to be a dancer. it’s just a game, after all. it’s good for the body and it doesn’t hurt to get a little competitive. i’ve always loved competitions and tests, any sort of examination to be honest, but that’s beside the point. i just think it’ll be interesting to beat you. i promise i’ll go easy on you.”

the one thing that she did not lack was a fierce spirit, something that sporadically resembled great arrogance, but it was far less severe. “then again, you do probably have many years of experience. you were around when the dance dance revolution came out, right? that’s a lot of time, isn’t it? just make sure you don’t tire yourself too much,” it was a joke this time, followed by an actual laugh.

[fmdxarabella]

durifmd​:

      on his off days and the days he almost needed to shape his dancing up slightly, he would find himself within the arcade. now, that’s probably an odd place to ‘shape up your dancing.’ but, to be fair, the arcade has dance dance revolution and he promises that it really does work to play the game! at least, for himself. so, he had showed up for dance dance revolution this time and not actually for the plushies. okay, maybe at some point he might end up trying to win a plushie, but he really should probably avoid those machines because he doesn’t need anymore. 

he was making his way over to the dance dance revolution machine to play a few rounds of the game and hoping beat his own high score. flashing lights of different machines around him, before he comes upon a familiar face. his usual smile widens a bit, “hi!” he greets them. “i’m about to go play some ddr, do you want to join me?” he asked, gesturing towards the nearby machine. 

she’s losing touch with reality; and no matter how strange and unpleasant it was to face this fact, arabella could no longer keep pretending, hiding in her ivory tower, and running away from it. she used to be different, more modest, familiar with the world around her. but now it all seemed peculiar at best, yet most of the time it was simply boring and too mundane for her attention. so what happened? she couldn’t exactly tell, but she also couldn’t blame it all on her extensive and looming schedules. so she returned to the one familiarity she knew , the world of arcade and games, a distant memory of her childhood in new york. 

“ah duri, hello,” she greeted, perplexed by his presence. “you want me to join you?” it almost felt like a tease, considering the difference in their professions, but turning down a challenge just wasn’t acceptable. because in arabella’s head, it was a challenge, not an offer.  “sure. the future’s now, old man. let’s dance.”

[fmdxarabella]

fmdtaejin​:

starter for @fmdxarabella

it’s like downplayed russian roulette on a day off — the days where freedom rests on his shoulders, all encompassing to the point where he draws himself blank. yet, even amongst the void of not knowing what, he knows it’s like second nature by the time he arrives at arabella’s with nothing more than two bags bearing gifts, looped around his arm and the comfort of familiarity.

it’s nothing, he thinks by the time it’s his fifth run through her closet, fingers flitting through the various clothes (some bad, some good. he holds his reservations.) but he’s made a straightaway for two piles that hold the concept clear: throw away trash, and keep the salvageable ones.

the only thing he makes of it is through the grimace of his face, eyebrows scrunched tossing another piece of tattered fabric across his shoulders — last season, so toss. “i didn’t realize this would be an all day thing,” a shallow sigh as the shake in his head begs to differ. there’s apprehension in the pile building up behind him, but he clings onto the notion: out of sight, and out of mind (for now, he’ll tell himself till he believes it.) “you can’t be serious with this? how are you carrying anything but a birkin — balenciaga and alexander wang, this can’t be seen.” and taejin wishes he were half serious when gravity yanks his tone to a plea, eyes widened when his gaze stares straight into hers.

yet, it lessens in the beat of silence. another sigh, and he’s loosened up by the time his footsteps shuffle forward, arms wrapped around her small frame. “your stylist should be fired. let me work instead of her, i could clear my schedules and i’m almost certain i’d do a better job than her.”

out of all the possible scenarios in her head  — this one she wasn’t able to predict or leave up to her vivid imagination. the time she thought was just for the two of them ended up turning into an unexpected fashion raid and she couldn’t tell how it even started or what actually triggered it; but then, all it takes is one weak layer to cause an avalanche, and maybe she was trudging along and dancing on thin ice this entire time.

he’s smart at least  — she had to admit that,  as he found ways to distract and trick her so he could sneak into her closet without her even fully noticing. the main culprits were of course the bags filled with gifts; and it’s not like she’s a materialist girl, drawn to glittery objects and things, but she’s curious, incapable of resisting the urge to look — reaching for everything just like pandora. 

but he was loud, not so subtle about his little fashion project, and when she noticed the growing pile, she only crossed her arms in disbelief, giving herself a minute to rearrange her own thoughts. “what the fuck are you still doing in my closet? get out! and also, why are tossing away half of my wardrobe?” she was rarely upset, much less angry, but something about his project just didn't feel right.  “and what did you just say a moment ago? an all day thing? you were supposed to be spending time with me! and just for you information, miss rihanna also owns alexander wang bags.”

she remained still, with her arms crossed, refusing to wrap them around him. “ get. out. of. my. closet.” 

[fmdxarabella]

fmddowoon​:

dowoon’s new year meeting with bc’s stylist spelled out nothing but impending doom for his rather haphazardly organised wardrobe. make room in your closet, they’d said. you’ve seriously let your style go. it’s gone on for long enough. you look like a slob in candid fantakens. why the hell are they so serious over clothes? he’s never had any sense of style to let go in the first place, but he supposes the aim is to improve his impression. he’s skeptical, of course – the company caring about something they’ve never shown any interest in before is always dangerous. up until now, they’ve been happy to let him fade into the background in unbranded grey sweats and a hoodie that smells like his dog. he shines on stage, not off of it.

sat cross legged on his floor, he turns to the person he’s invited to help him clear out his clothes with a scowl. meanwhile, wang, his chihuahua, sniffs the pile of shirts already forming the donation pile with interest. “i don’t dress that badly, do i?” no, he doesn’t, he assures himself, not even giving the other a chance to respond before he resumes his grumbling, his voice low and originating from the back of his throat. “it’s just annoying. i only want to be comfortable. they’re gonna make me wear stiff denim, i know it.”

the brunette, mildly put, didn’t really see herself as fit for the challenge nor the task at hand, given that she too was recently scolded for the way she dresses, which resulted in her closet turning half empty. but maybe she did look presentable, even stylish, which is why she ended up right here, listening to a tirade that only made her nod in agreement.  “i don’t– ” know, she had hoped to say, but only stuttered, remaining interrupted. then why did you even ask in the first place? the question was right there, ringing loud and clear inside of her head, but she was never the arguing type, keeping her mouth shut and eyes focused on her phone screen as she scrolled through endless shopping pages.  “i don’t think that fashion has anything to do with being comfortable.”

“have you tried purchasing a birkin bag? i’ve only recently discovered my love for them, but once you have them, they truly change your life and fashion game. do they even make birkin bags for men?” she answered her own questioned by typing in the exact same words, which resulted in her finding the hermes online store. “look at this one! it’s only 13.000 dollars. i think it would go well with everything.” 

[fmdxarabella]

fmdtaejin​:

“you know, if there’s something that never gets old, it’s your logic and how it’s foolproof even in situations like this.” and that was the truth that lured him in, closer and closer to the cliches of moth to flame — an infallible charm presented novel each time taejin was met with the one-two punch of her reply. “you picking out my suits?” his expression softened, eyes crinkling in the mid-laugh that ruptured out of his mouth. a ludicrous thought in a two-fold reason of a secret relationship, and the jab into his attachment to all things materialistic. “you already know, i can out dress any other idol or person in this industry — i don’t even need a stylist. kanye dresses kim, and i bet i could dress you,” he huffed, a petulant pout relieving the pent up frustration boxed in from hours on end inside the draining event. but a few momentary seconds of bliss found in glimpses of conversation with arabella, and now he was succumbing to the effects of a lovelorn daze in goofy grins.

a jump, retreat at her response and taejin backtracked his statement in instantaneous reaction of eyes pulled wide open and mouth to follow. “no, what? no.” fingers pointed, and he was never one to fall into the tune of shipping and ridiculous pairings — a scat clean image never wrapped in the dangers of online rumors. “i don’t think i’m ‘shipped’” air quotes around the last words, and his eyes looked around for any ears that might have remained privy to the conversation. “though, i should start looking if we’re shipped. i’ll make that my first thing when i learn how to do twitter. i still don’t fully get instagram, and my manager uploads for me. turns out, i’m not even allowed following you on there because apparently, that’s dangerous territory for fan speculation.” he realized too late that the rapid-fire of his blabbering statements broke the facade of a stoic idol veteran, but that didn’t matter. at least, not when he was zoned back into a make-believe zone of them versus the world. in this case, he’d afford looking like an idiot if it gave any glimpse of her gummy grin. “you trusting me is great and all, but i’d like to see you get jealous so i have a reason to remind you that you’re the only girl i see.” a taper of his voice, a diverted gaze all stemmed from drifting off into the sheepishness and sliver of embarrassment that arose from his admission.

“i know,” she quipped and then found herself subtly winking at him, failing to fully see his point. she thought she knew, she thought she understood, but he was just as confusing as her in certain moments; there’s more to taejin than meets the eye and not all is as beautiful as he wishes to believe, but that’s perhaps what pulls her time after time. “what’s wrong with me picking out your suits? why are you laughing, taejin? did i say something funny? are you implying that i have no style?” there it was, her inability to read the room, clinging to her with ferocious strength. “yes— yes, again i know. of course you can. there’s no one above you. but why do you want to dress me? and are you saying that now we’re kim and kanye?” she questioned with a hint of annoyance in her tone provoked by his sudden and quite unnecessary ostentatious comments.

“well you brought it up first, taejin. i was just curious. i thought you were about to tell me about the person you’re being shipped with. i’ve never googled your name — but okay, i did a few times, but never in such context. maybe fans of decipher are just too old to care,” the whole subject at hand surely revolved around maturity, something that fans of a senior group should’ve acquired by now, at least by her impartial opinion.  “i don’t think that we’d be shipped.  i just don’t think that people have noticed anything out of the ordinary. but sure, of course, taejin. i have no doubts that you’ll manage to master twitter. but wait, instagram gives you trouble? what’s so hard to understand about it? and it doesn’t make sense that they don’t allow you to follow me, we’re colleagues after all, but a lot of things don’t make sense so maybe you’ll just have to let it slide,” while not the most skilled, she tried her best to comfort taejin, offering him a smile as a sign of reassurance. “aw, did you pull that line out of your drama?” without a second of deliberation, she placed her hands on his shoulders, looking up at him with a grin, all while disregarding her initial concerns of being seen. “i guess it’s just really hard for me to get jealous. would it help if i say that i’m not going to run away to a foreign country with the first younger man that comes in a brand new ferrari? or that i’ll push any girl that touches you off stage? i’m really just making wild guesses here.”

[fmdxarabella]

fmdhimchan​:

his lips kick into a smirk, tilting his head to the side and sliding his hands into his damp jacket pockets. “oh yeah?” a tongue-in-cheek tone, looking out at the rain, that dyes the pavement as he flattens out his hair. “i thought it was why you were standing here alone instead of with everyone else.”  he glances back, her laugh and smile a line to draw him together with his own not dropping. “we could go in, but wouldn’t it more fun to just ghost?” he doesn’t even know her. does he need to?

“it’ll be better than whatever dishes they’re serving in that place.” he nods with eyes closed in firm belief and tone that conveys complete trust, “pizza never goes wrong.” her face sticks him as familiar, but he’s certain they’d never spoken. “any pizza. all pizza. i could eat any. do what makes you happy.” he hadn’t paid any mind to his shivering until she makes the comments, a laugh misconstrued as slightly teasing. “i think i’ll be ok. keep your jacket and stay warm for the two of us.” shoulders are curled in and his posture is hunched anymore, like all of the center of him is a tiny flame he’s safeguarding from blowing out. “you’re funny for offering though. too kind.” he means that, for the most part, as a sense of judgement, like he was determining what kind of person she was and he was quickly deciding what sort that was. “do you offer to give all kinds of strangers the clothes off your back?”

she was never known for her smile, convinced that the the curves of her lips somehow made her face look strange; and yet most of the time, she rarely had a reason to smile, refusing to succumb to most social expectations. simply put, she did not fake her smiles and that is why they most of the time felt so awkward, highlighting her lack of practice. “yeah? maybe i just like standing all alone,” she commented as if it were a fact, something that she knew with certainty. “well i like the way you think and i can’t remember the last time i’ve said the exact same thing to anyone else. besides, i’m almost knowing for ghosting,” like a discarded feather, she followed the wind, needing only a light push. 

“true. pizza’s the best dish in the world. pizza and lavender ice cream. i still can’t decide if it tastes like soap or not,” she paused, trying to think of her favorite pizzeria in seoul. only few came to mind. “you’re wrong actually. some people really shouldn’t be allowed to make pizzas. but trust me, there’s no better pizza than the new york pizza. so maybe pizza iconic? i think they’re pretty decent. here look at the online menu,” she offered him her phone, unsure if she would make the right order. best to check. always.  “okay then. suit yourself. i was just trying to help. but i don’t know what’s so funny about it. plus when people say that someone’s too kind, they’re just masking their doubts,” she wondered if he had a more solid reason for saying no, other than the so-called required politeness between two strangers. “yeah. of course. if i can. it’s just clothes at the end of the day, you know. i can always buy new one.”

[fmdxarabella]

fmdtaejin​:

taejin never expected more, a wrecking ball of logic inside factual evidence and statements spilling out without an afterthought — the facet of arabella’s personality that counterbalanced his own emotionally-driven grievances to the award ceremony. perhaps, it was this constituent of push-pull, filling the lapses in his foible that quirked up the edges of his mouth high into his cheek. “decipher hasn’t been to these award shows in years — and now, they have me here dancing on stage? you know how embarrassing it is when you’re dancing in a suit that’s not even tom ford?” his tone tapered down to a near low-whine with his eyes fully widened — exasperation and desperation hitting his thirties as what he wanted was sheer privacy and comfort, confined to the walls of his home.

“my manager even said i’m not allowed to get close when i talk, i have to maintain thirty centimeters so people don’t start ‘shipping’ or begin with her rumors.” his body loosened, shoulders rounding out as the faux helplessness reverted back to the baseline of jokes. “i learned what that word was today — do you know what it means? shipping, the young kids on twitter do it apparently.” taejin shrugged, staggering back to the lovelorn daze of her suggestion — a dopey smile and relaxed eyes. like clockwork, the woes of the event dissipated with the cheers of the crowd and the low bass of the speakers. and now, he was floating along — rolling with the punches. “if you promise, then i’m sure i’ll get through the event just fine, and even excel at making my own rounds. what movie are we watching?” the thought of his own marketing made him cringe, wriggle inside his skin — sheer discomfort at the idea his name was now just an empty vessel filled together and pieced by the mandated details of bc. “having to pretend kiss fans, let’s not talk about that. i want to rid it from my memories forever, and i never want to have do it again.”

“well isn’t that a good thing? it means that after all these years, decipher is still pretty important. you’ve created a legacy and now you’re legendary, and not many groups can say that. besides, i love watching you dance on stage and we can go this week to a tom ford store, so that i can help you pick the best suits. wait— can i?” suddenly she interrupted herself, aware that perhaps that might not have been the best idea to put into taejin’s head, as the sheer level of their notoriety made such public things impossible. truth be told, she still needed more time to get used to the whole notion of a private relationship, but she was certainly making a progress, never being the one to let little details slip past her. it was a part of her intricate nature and quite quaint personality, the very thing that either made her charming or irritating to some people, depending only on their stance of course.

“thirty centimeters? that’s not surprising at all. it definitely sounds like something bc managers would say. but shipping? are you telling me that you’ve been involved in shipping rumors?” for the first time during this strange evening, she allowed herself to laugh freely, not even trying to hold back the genuine giggling. “yes i do know what it means. i think i found that word once when i was trying to fall asleep, so i ended up doing some research on the internet. but twitter is stupid. it’s just a platform where most people get to be the dumbest versions of themselves. most want to believe that they’re smart and educated, but usually they’re writing the most ridiculous things. so don’t let it bother you, okay?” arabella had her own problems with social media, remaining only loyal to instagram after all this time in the industry. “have i ever lied to you? i don’t make stuff up so of course i promise. we can watch whatever you want,” an affirmative nod accompanied her words, followed by a now confident smile. “to me it looked pretty interesting, but i want you to know that i don’t care because i trust you. it’s just like when you have to kiss your co-stars. it’s a job, that’s it. at the end of the day, you’re still mine.”  

[fmdxarabella]

fmdhimchan​:

with: open.

rain pours, forecast deception was hardly unforgivable, common in todays world of weather. for such an event, it was more unfortunate, with idols gathered here or there, sprinkled around in pockets as they stay separate from the gray overhang in the parking lot, or out on the terraces. not everyone was here, but it still felt strange to see so many coworkers and idols, seniors and hoobaes in one place. he’s late, that’s why he catches them. running into someone just as the skies open up with a cry of lightning and the rain pours unsuspecting, catching many beneath the onfall, chani included.

the drizzle just began when he tucked next to someone, hiding beneath a tin roof walkway and shaking out the rain in a sprinkle every direction. “shit…” the word doesn’t sound as sorry or misfortuned as it should, looking over with a dagger grin at the sole person stuck on this side of the parking lot with him. “raining. guess we can’t go in.” he sounds just as far opposite of upset as he can go. “think it’s too late to get some pizza and blow this place instead?” with his hair sticking to his forehead and every article of clothing he has damp, shivers and little shakes from the cold, he somehow looks so content.

it was a bad miscalculation on her part, for trusting weather forecasts these days seems to be as foolish as trusting a fortune teller who promises to tell you everything for the smallest price. given the circumstances, there was only so much that she could, knowing that it was best to wait for it to be over. and so while most probably became susceptible to irritation, arabella only fished out her phone out of her pocket, dialed a few numbers and remained silent, hidden under something that could barely be described as good cover. “it’s raining? are you sure? i didn’t even notice. are you sure that we can’t go in?” usually, she lacked the proper skills to ever fully deliver sarcastic statements, but today it seemed the rain had brought a certain change with the wayward clouds. 

surprisingly, she laughed, and then smiled, taken aback by the sudden proposition. “i just called my chauffer, maybe i could text him to bring us pizza? it’s too bad you can’t get the famous new york slice anywhere around here, but anyways, what sort of pizza would you like?” she questioned, focusing once again on the bright screen of her phone. “by the way, would you like to take my jacket? i have like two on and you seem to be shivering. i think it could fit you well.”

[fmdxarabella]

fmdtaejin​:

starter for @fmdxarabella​

how many years prepare him for the same routine of press, red carpets glamorized in the hype of award shows remained insignificant. year twelve, and it was another last-minute return that transformed itself as dead-beat weight the way his shoes dragged on the red carpet and the perfect smile for the cameras soon relegated itself into a petulant frown, pulled together by a yawn as soon as he stepped back stage. the only source of reprieve was the stolen glimpses of arabella, plucked and sought out inside the blur of a hazy crowd. and when she’s merely a few feet away, it becomes right here in the present that caused the quick rustle of his footsteps and a hand that tugged lightly at the crook of her elbow. “i think you being here is making this award show bearable.” his lips curved into the familiarity of the lopsided grin that was inevitable under the pretense of arabella. 

“but still — it’s no fun when i have to pretend to not pay attention to you while you make your rounds talking to no-names. can’t you spend time with me now?” a lapse in his unshaken facade came the the whiny tinges clinging onto the end of his words as his spine slowly unraveled back into the wall behind him. “i can’t wait till this is all over and we can go home. this whole ‘unable to be public’ thing, it sucks. kim byungchul, sucks — though, i don’t even think our ceo is aware of our bliss.”

standing still, in a state that could only be described as half-awake, she barely bothered to listen to all the stages directions and prompts that were being given out, having them memorized almost perfectly after all these years in the idol industry as one of the wish members. it was redundant, tedious, but most of all necessary, especially for those who were only beginning their journeys. trying her hardest to conceal her yawns, she suddenly felt much more alert when she felt a slight tug, coming face to face with none other than taejin. well that was certainly a relief. “they’re award shows, taejin. they’re not supposed to be bearable for us. but it’s what we get paid for, so you have to accept the current circumstances. it was even stated in our contracts. i knew what i was signing up for,” but the despite her professional tone, she couldn’t help but smile, finding herself foolishly wishing that she could sink into his arms without any repercussions or warnings.

“make it fun. you should make your own rounds too, maybe it’ll be a decent distraction. but sure. i’m yours for the next fifteen minutes. your time starts... now, ” she announced with a quick glance at her watch. “well we’ll go home soon and listen, maybe we could even order some food and watch a movie while in bed. how does that sound? i’m sure that we won’t even remember this award show. but when it comes to our ceo, well again, it’s what we’re being paid for, taejin. like, aren’t you known for your extra boyfriend charms? and didn’t you go viral for your superb fan service? it’s basically how you’re marketed. so it only makes sense that they want to keep you single.”

[fmdxarabella]

fmdsooah​:

Sooah always found Arabella a little bit difficult to approach. It wasn’t anything in particular. Just an overall vibe she got from the older idol, and that stuck with her because they were very different from each other. How she managed to approach Arabella first was still a wonder, and she couldn’t understand. How her brain didn’t short-circuit was a valid question too. “Because I get easily startled, so I don’t deal with jump scares well,” she says honestly because if Arabella is letting her stay, she might as well be honest and tell what the older one needs to know before letting her get comfortable. She didn’t want to impose that much was true. Sooah waves her hands in front of her, and her head does a similar movement, “I don’t mind spoilers, or whatever you have to say. If anything, I might be glad if you tell me who’s the bad guy in the first few minutes. I have the impression I will have less trouble with it if that’s the case.” She doesn’t say that she would very much like it if they’ve written big that it wasn’t based on true events, but she keeps to herself. But her emotions were always transparent, and she knew the fear was really clear in her eyes.

“okay, i can accept that. but if you have any basic knowledge on neural circuitry, you’ll easily understand why involuntary flinching is almost unavoidable for most people. we, humans, pretty much share this with all the other mammals and it’s actually a product of evolution. anyone or anything that doesn’t want be eaten alive will flinch, that’s why the movie producers only need some eerie locations and scary music,” she explained with something that resembled a smile on her lips, finding great excitement in the idea of sharing her thoughts and knowledge with the rest of the world. patting a small area on the blanket next to her, arabella silently motioned and gave the permission to sooah to sit down. “all right. no problem. but i could also let you guess and i could show you how to guess. it’s usually pretty simple, because if it’s a good movie, the director will leave the clues almost everywhere. maybe it’s the way the bad guy talks, writes, or even something that they like, which almost becomes like a recurring theme, so it’s important to pay attention to details. then of course, there are trash horror movies and they have no real plot or anything. they’re just a bloody freak show.”