Robin Hobb destroyed my soul

Finally caving and making a Realm of the Elderlings sideblog so I don't spoil my partner. ***This is NOT a spoiler-free space for Assassin's Fate***

[the-prince-of-the-ravens]

realm of the elderlings is soooooo hard to recommend to people. “it’s about the bastard son of a prince who’s raised to be an assassin and can also communicate with animals” <- sounds interesting, maybe even fun. “it will make you feel so bad you’ll wish you were never born” <- will instantly scare off 95% of all living beings except you really can’t leave that part out

[lambdatauri]

R.I.P. Chivalry Farseer, you would have loved grindr

[freakcliff]

modern things I would give rote characters based on my friend @tereshkina 's post

fitz: sertraline 150mg

beloved: singer sewing and embroidery machine

chade: cocaine or something

elliania: strap on

molly: birth control tbh

patience: wikipedia

verity: coffee exists in rote but coffee

shrewd: well. chemotherapy. but outside of that modern surveillance technology

kettricken: tbh kettricken is thriving. at most id give her some feminist theory like babe get a better husband but

starling: instagram

burrich: dog shows

dutiful: ps5

civil bresinga: supernatural fanfiction

regal: Twitter

[freakcliff]

in times of great distress due to physical disability at least we can imagine that fitzchivalry farseer is probably doing just as bad and ignoring it

[freakcliff]

farseer trilogy if various characters had a gun:

if Fitz had a gun it would be roughly the same length. fitz having a gun would solve some problems and create new, different problems

if burrich had a gun it would be shorter but not necessarily better

if shrewd had a gun you wouldn't know it

if kettricken had a gun things would likely be shorter and better

if verity had a gun he wouldn't use it

if starling had a gun she never would've been in the story. it would've been someone else's problem

if the fool had a gun maybe Fitz would listen to him. so I'm putting this one on 'shorter'

if regal had a gun it would be one book and everything would suck

kettle should be given a gun. it definetly would improve something

I'm not entirely convinced chade doesn't already have a gun

edit: I forgot patience. giving patience a gun is really great until she forgets about it

[weirwoodsugar]

i’m not really into modern aus in general as a rule and rote and fitzloved in particular are such context reliant characters that the idea of low stakes modern au is kind of Nothing to me like what even is that except. there is a major exception here. which is that amber specifically amber more than any other belovedsonas is a real person i know like that is a real woman you can find in any mid sized american city with a real art scene. tall blonde whimsical-yet-goal-oriented transfem politically involved artisan who has a little booth she sets up at every single local art fair all summer and you have no idea how old she is or where she came from but you think she mentioned one time that she went to clown college. and she has a mournful little boyfriend with an ugly fucking wolf tattoo and he sits by her feet instead of next to her in a chair like a normal person. she used to make zines about her dreams and she wears tevas she goes to like pickle workshop events and craft group and her friends softball games and hosts pay what you can woodworking classes and everyone’s like i wonder what’s up with amber and her sad little dog man but none of you know for sure. like this is a woman you see at various events. she’s real i know her i saw her at the fourth annual gay rodeo selling horse figurines. paragon is a honda civic in this scenario i guess.

[freakcliff]

fitz is such a great character to imagine in the modern world to me because idk he's just such a guy I know. i can so clearly imagine him in flannels and sweatshirts and hiking boots every single day and he has a big dirty pickup truck. he grew up on a farm. his favorite person in the world is a huge dog. he inexplicably is really good at calligraphy

[lesbiansagainsttheatre]

the bitch on this wine my stepdad's friend brought for dinner kinda looks like the fool

[hannahelatham]

THE GLOVES this idea has lived rent free in my head for months lolol ☁️ print available here! (HD also version available on patreon - join for an exclusive discount code off my prints (which essentially makes the patreon free!) and get access to this and a bunch of my other illustrations - including some spicy stuff - two months early!)

[hannahelatham]

headcanon that lord golden and his bodyguard have kissed in all the dark corners of Buckkeep

[webley-art]

[luinquesse]

Aaand also posting this on it’s own, the comparison post is here

[seleyin]

Let me live in my fantasy fantasy land where they all live super happy lives and the worse they have to worry about is Patience mildly poisoning everyone due to cooking experiments

[somepeoplejugglegeese]

The Fool: Burrich was so pissed at Galen for hurting you that he dragged him out of the castle and beat him up in front of everyone

Fitz: But Burrich doesn’t even like me

The Fool: …I’m in love with an idiot

Fitz: Oh, really? Who?

[varethane]

I’ve gotten into Robin Hobb’s Elderlings novels– been listening to them all as audiobooks, and falling deeper and deeper in love with the worldbuilding and characters. Finally I decided to make some fanart of my favourite character, The Fool (also known as Amber, Lord Golden, and Beloved).

[alloysius-g]

I don't think I've ever fallen in love with a character as fast as I did with Jek

[risoria]

some Fitz looks……