I am a mess

Whatever happens, happens.

[kuroscurro]

vashwood x fleabag but it's WAY WORSE

[robs-your-robins]

Bruce has been deep into a case and he realises, with that pang that Alfred is out and the kids have been really conspicuously quiet for a while. Bruce heads upstairs and hears the kids whispering. They're all gathered around a whiteboard, haggling over something.

Tim: Nah-ah, no way. Not happening.

Jason: Don't be such a baby, Tim.

Tim, grabbing for the marker in Jason's hand: Her dad stole my fucking spleen.

Jason: And?

Tim, pointing to Damian who's actually just chilling on the sofa with Alfred the Cat: She gave birth to him. What if she makes more of them?

Damian: That's actually fair.

Dick, grabbing the marker and scrawling a name on the board: Which is why it has to be Selina.

Duke: That's just square one all over again, Grayson.

Damian: She has cats and she is a skilled warrior.

Cass: I second that.

Jason: And Talia literally dogwalks Deathstroke, why is this even a point of discussion?

Dick, tapping the marker on the board: She. Makes. Him. Smile. What else do you want?

Tim: So does Clark Kent but-

Steph, jumping up to point at the third name on : EXACTLY

Cass: Why would you start her off again?

Steph: HAVE YOU SEEN THEM TOGETHER?

Dick: Look nobody would want Clark as a stepdad more than me but it's not happening.

Duke: This is the Stepmom debate. Stepdads were last week.

Damian: We're losing focus here. Drake, roll the PowerPoint again. We need fresh eyes on this.

[teatimetaker]

Don't kids say the wildest things?

Also Thomas Wayne wasn't that kind of doctor Timmy.

[mortalityplays]

this was my favourite live redditor reaction. oouurgh I've been Inflicted with a Maoist absurdity.

[fre4kcore-b4stard]

“The axe forgets, but the tree remembers” is typically a very true statement. Unless, of course, you have moral ocd, in which case the axe has been haunted for weeks and the tree does not remember or care. In fact, many sources report that the axe, which is actually a plastic butter knife, has never been anywhere near a forest. And also there is no tree.

[bebebeep0v0]

[depsidase]

[depsidase]

[depsidase]

[mcmcgreevy]

My god I wish more people understood this.

[depsidase]

[reibub]

r there any batfam enjoyers, my friend recently got me into it so thank them for any art i make okies <3

[depsidase]

[depsidase]

[parkchanwoohoo]

[depsidase]

[depsidase]

[writing-prompt-s]

You never understood why magic attacks were blocked instead of dodged. So you went to the circus academy and studied the art of the artists, learning to cartwheel, salto or roll while casting. You have been dominating the duell-arena ever since.