Greetings, fellows
Yes, I’m still alive...at least parts of me are, I guess?
I’ve been questioning the definition of “me” for a while ‘cause I’m really struggling to describe sometimes. Isn’t every being supposed to be different, to be unique?
Then why does the word “I” feel more like a mix of the people around me, like a mere creation of society? Doesn’t blending in with the enviorment mean that I’m losing parts of my “original character”, bit by bit? Doesn’t it mean that the “me” right now is not the true me? Is there even a true, real self? What will be left, if you take away the things given or influenced by others like hobbies, interests, things that you love or hate. What will be left of “you”, of “me”?
To be honest, I stopped trusting myself with things that I enjoy ‘cause I’ll always get the feeling that it’s not me, happily chatting over it but someone else. I feel like I’m just adadapting to those around me, blending in to be able to talk to them. I’ve changed characters so many times these past days, going from cheerful to reliable, from bossy asshole to cheeky friend.
The last few weeks have shown me just how much I’m swinging between moods depending on my surroundings, it’s kinda scary...
I’m scared of the day that I’ll wake up and don’t know who “I” am anymore. Is there even a “me”?















