Optimist With Depressive Tendencies

"You are made of the sea and the stars, and one day you are going to find yourself again."

[hrgifs]

fingers in his mouth friday‼️

[ot3]

i'm more sympathetic than most to the gay women who are like "i can't get into f/f romance because it feels too personal" because for awhile that was me. and this was mostly because yknow i was a teenager still developing my own feelings on being gay. but also it's not like pathologically avoiding something because its proximity to your own sexuality is alienating and uncomfortable will make you More comfortable with your own feelings on romance and sex. the truth is that i think women kind of Are conditioned to/expected to relate to fictional narratives with a level of personal projection and emotional intimacy that men aren't expected to need.

i don't remember who said this so i'm having a hard time finding the source and am about to butcher this anecdote but it's like. some musician woman talking about how all of her songs are assumed to be autobiographical and intimately personally revealing, and her thought on that is something along the lines of "why can't anyone ever say I'm a good storyteller." To me that's part of the same line of misogyny that makes people relate to f/f works this way.

In general there's a pretense that women's fiction skews towards the autobiographical in a way men's doesn't. like phoebe waller bridge accidentally making shit really hard for her family after releasing fleabag because of how large a portion of the audience thought it was an attempt to depict her own family's real life dynamics [x]. Like it couldn't have been Fiction, it had to be a Fictionalization in these peoples' eyes.

Basically like either as creators or as the audience women aren't afforded the capacity to engage with fiction as intellectually interested third parties. you have to be either reproducing your own immediate emotional landscape, or you have to be projecting that immediate emotional landscape onto one of the characters.

and like i dunno man i think once i accepted "i don't need to emotionally connect to every or even any depictions of lesbian romance i see in fiction" it became much easier to get into f/f. like ohhh none of this has to be about me even a little bittttttttt... i'm literally not involved here at all. abandon the pursuit of "representation" as an endgoal of fictional experiences.

[freckstiel-blog]

wakes up: tired

mid day: tired

afternoon: could literally sleep for 20 hours straight

evening: normal

middle of the goddamn night: its time to Go!!!!!!!!!

[binkyfishes]

[treygotguap]

Girls will say they busy and be in their bed relaxin or sleep

[brunette-cosette-deactivated202]

[01101010010101-10101001010110-d]

[davykesey]

[beauteenth]

[softepilogue]

right now you might be in a situation that you think you won’t survive but six months ago you were in a situation that you didn’t think you’d survive and two years before that you were in a situation you didn’t think you’d survive and the point is you will always surprise yourself and you will always make it through

[jonvier89]

Pink Waterfalls

[deactivated-blog]

[stardustsam-deactivated20201203]

Supernatural Creations Challenge | stardustsam  ↳ Prompt: Dean Winchester + Sam Winchester +  “You and me. We’re all that’s left” +  World Gone Mad - Bastille

[averagefairy]

ok can we agree that the WORST feeling is when you’re just sitting around consciously procrastinating and you’re just overly aware that each second that passes is more time wasted and you like watch hours pass and you’re STILL procrastinating and you CANT STOP and your panicked brain is trapped inside a body that refuses to be productive and inside you’re screaming but outwardly you’re just eating chips 

[monstermonstre]

self care is watching hours of r.i.p. vine compilations on youtube

[aestum]

(by bdorts)

[cabin-porn]