WHAT TO DO IF YOUR FRIEND OFTEN GOES NONVERBAL
So, as someone who is selectively mute/prone to shutdowns, people donât often know what to do when I go nonverbal, and itâs not like they can ask, so Iâll give some tips!
Ask them what you should do while theyâre nonverbal before they go nonverbal.
Keep in mind that for some people, nonverbal means they simply canât talk but can still communicate through writing, texting, nodding, etc. But, for some, it means they cannot communicate at all (and this can change based on the type of episode as well). If this happens, just be patient, and be somewhat still. If you talk, try to talk softly.
Some people like to listen to others talk when theyâre nonverbal, and some donât. Talk to youâre friend when theyâre verbal so you can find out which is best for them.
If youâre out and about, make sure that you make it obvious that if you have to talk for them (i.e. order food for them, thank the bus driver, tell someone they canât speak, etc.), that it really isnât a bother.
DO NOT RIDICULE THEM. Do not make fun of them, do not get visibly frustrated, do not get angry, do not try to force them to talk. This will only make things worse.
Being nonverbal is different for everyone; if you know your friend is known to go nonverbal, ask them what you should do in that situation. For some people itâs not a big deal, but for some people it is. Ironically, you have to communicate with them (while they can, of course) to find out what is best.
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