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Tooru

I love everything about kagihira and what a wonderful message it gives to aro and/or ace people. The idea that love is love, the origin of it doesn't matter, it's what you both want from it. I love how Hirano explores his feelings and never devalues how he loves Kagiura, he thinks so positively about finding places where their love overlaps and the way Kagiura always seeks to understand Hirano, doesn't take Hirano's repulsion with being touched in certain places/ways personally, and the way they just seek to understand each other in general. (When Kagi was talking to Niibashi and thought 'everyone has somewhere where they don't like being touched' I was about to burst into tears)

That's what kagihira's always been about - finding their middle point, because they want to be together, and exploring what that means for them with no restrictions, not caring about what societal norms may be ESPECIALLY when it comes to platonic relationships, and whenever people say 'that can't possibly be platonic' when sometimes it just is. The meaning behind your action is your own emotions behind it, and no one can dictate that for you. Hirano and Kagiura both have their own understandings of what a platonic or romantic action is to them (read: Hirano accepting chocolate on valentine's day in a platonic way but Kagiura getting upset about it because he understands that as a romantic action)

I just love how understanding is the main theme of their relationship. It's not something they easily fall into, it's something uniquely theirs, and in a sense it is something easy for them. They've been loving each other even before they started dating, it's just that there's a different weight and meaning to their actions now.

I especially adore Hirano. As an aroace person myself, I love reading about someone so comfortable in who they are. Hirano isn't going to force himself to fit some box, he's happy with who he is, and he's exploring that identity with Kagiura. He's talking to him and they're figuring things out and he loves him so much. He doesn't consider actions having inherent meaning, and instead figuring out for himself what touch he does and doesn't like, when he does like it and when he doesn't, and he's so open with Kagiura I adore the boundaries in their relationship.

That's something I really enjoy reading. Being aroace-spec isn't a rigid identity like any other is - everyone has their own boundaries, and these can change over time, or depending on the person they're with, and I love how fluid Hirano is. Obviously, people can have their hard lines in the sand and these can remain, and sometimes you just dislike an action full stop. But I find Hirano such a wonderful character with how he disregards what society should dictate what he does and doesn't like (read: not being interested in kissing and most importantly happy with that, he doesn't think there's something wrong with him or anything.) Especially when there are a lot of stereotypes of aro and/or ace people (usually aro) being cold unfeeling untouchy people, so it's lovely to see such a clingy character who enjoys being physically close with their partner!

Basically, all this to say is that I love the representation of a queerplatonic relationship in Kagihira and Hirano is such a uniquely wonderful representation of an aroace character

forestgranted

just like old times

isjasz

Duel pact

miseria-fortes-viros

ultimately the truth about frankenstein is that we are all grotesque amalgamations of the best and worst parts of everyone who came before us. and sometimes the people who are supposed to love us because of and in spite of this will not. and we can kill them with hammers for that. and i think that’s beautiful

blonding

skip and loafer is a series about how no one is uniquely undeserving of love, how no one is ever truly alone in their suffering. no matter what you've been through or the trauma you've faced, everyone has the right to come back into the world and be greeted with open arms. you're never alone, hope is always there, hope is always waiting for you. you just have to reach out and grasp it

findingcrow

Okay, its been a couple months since my last Roomies post which means I need to ramble more (mainly because I consume the found family trope like its oxygen I need to survive), so here we go again!!!

The Roomies (Grian, Etho, and Cleo in Secret Life) are genuinely my favorite group out of all of the life series. They are the very definition of found family. They made the trope, actually. And what's worse is that they were doomed from the beginning.

Grian, known for abandoning people for the hell of it anytime it's convenient. The last time he was really loyal to someone was in Last Life with Scar, and after how that ended, I like to think that he was afraid to make any connections like that again. He messes with people for the sake of it. He is the embodiment of chaos itself.

Cleo, known for her violent and merciless nature. Throughout the series, she's constantly making a long list of people to kill when she gets the chance. It's not often she displays openness with people, especially knowing how the life series always ends. The last time she did, her family was splitting by the seams and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She refuses to not be in power again like that.

Etho, extremely serious and yet not at all. He'll lie when he needs to, he'll mess with whoever he wants, whenever he wants. He does his tasks, bumps into everyone and no one on the way. Known for being loyal, but loyal to who? All of the other seasons are done, he has no solid allies, besides BDubs.

And yet after the divorce arc, Cleo and Etho reunite, Etho allowing Cleo to stay when she was trying to escape Tango and the others. It's more for connivence at first, maybe helping out with a task here or there. They made a home and continue on.

Then Grian asks for a place to stay- just as Cleo had all those episodes ago- and they say yes. They know that there's a high likelihood of him killing them when the time comes to it. They look between each other, remembering all of their pasts and all of the blood shed, and they realize that they're just the same as the man standing at their door asking for shelter. Not a home, just a shelter. That's all this is for the three of them, it's a roommates-for-connivence situation.

But over time, they all get... closer. Maybe it's after the zombie apocalypse, where Grian's first thought after realizing is, "I need to warn Cleo and Etho" or where Etho purposefully wards the zombies away from his friends. Maybe it's after the traps set specifically to kill them. Maybe it's after Grian begs Etho and Cleo to do the "zombie dance," where Cleo tries her best despite not even knowing it existed.

There was never a specific moment where they decided they were no longer roommates and that they were family. It's rarely acknowledged until Grian is speaking with the two of them where he swears to never hurt them, even after all of them turn Red. Etho and Cleo, in return, agree.

When the end eventually comes, like they all knew it would, they stick together. They climb high up, high enough where they should be able to live in peace together for the rest of eternity. But they're found, just like the game is meant to go, and everyone knows there's going to be people who don't come down. Etho is one of the first.

There's no mistaking the cries that are shouted when Etho falls. Grian and Cleo watch intently, only wanting Etho to run faster. They don't hear his final words, they don't hear him say "I'm going home, everybody. I'm dying in my home." They don't get to be there, in his last moments, as he passes away in the home they made together. All Cleo and Grian can do is mourn for a short moment before trying to save themselves. Grian calls out, "No, Etho, my boy!!!" eyes straying to their home, staying there for a moment, not being able to know what happened there, other than his family being dead. Cleo begins to do something similar- "Etho, you're my bo..." She lets out a sob, her voice cracking, before she quickly distracts herself. She understands now what the goal of the game is, how everyone else is playing it. They're willing to do anything to avenge Etho, even if it means getting killed themselves.

Grian and Cleo- only two of their trio, a blank space left open where another should be- work together, barely leaving each others side. But eventually they're found, even with their trap doing so much damage. Cleo is the second to go, cornered and slaughtered.

Grian was the last to join The Roomies and the last to leave, and he made sure it counted. He fought not only for himself, but for his fallen family. He's only one person, but he fights with the strength of all three of them. Eventually, he's killed, just like the others, but at least he did what he could. He tried, and that was all that mattered.

I'd like to think that Etho and Cleo were waiting for him, then. Etho had waited for Cleo, both of them tearing up at the fact that they got to see each other again. They cheered from above, watching Grian fight off so many more than himself. And when Grian joined them, they opened their arms, the same that had held on so tight throughout the series. The three of them, The Roomies, they had named themselves, were only thankful that their last memories of each other's faces weren't the bloody versions from their deaths.

The three of them were so different. They had different personalities, different friends, different backgrounds. They knew that in the end, only one could win. And yet they were willing to die for each other, ready to murder the whole server in cold blood for even trying to hurt any of them. After trying so hard to not be attached, they couldn't help it.

Family isn't always the blood in your veins; sometimes its the blood on your hands. Sometimes it's the hand that holds yours, despite it being red-stained and calloused. Sometimes it's the ones that would be willing to spill more blood with you, for you, even if it was illogical. Sometimes it's the stupid animals that you named together, sometimes its the adventures that ended up causing pain but you can laugh through because you're not alone.

findingcrow

Hey making my return just for this

Grian told Cleo and Etho “If we turn red today, I’m sticking by you. That’s the deal. It’s not over until it’s over.” Which, first of all, is such a big deal because he’s known for going wherever is continent (“I’ve never seen a man drop a pair of sunglasses so fast” - Scott) and he actually stayed loyal to them and kept his word. Etho and Cleo knew he wasn’t trustworthy and still welcomed him with open arms.

At the end of Secret Life for Etho, he died by saying “I’m going home everybody, I’m dying in my home.” The place that he made with Grian and Cleo, and he called it home.

Now, keeping all of this in mind, I can’t help but wonder what would have happened if the roomies had won. I mean all of the odds were against them, but just imagine for a moment. It would be Desert Duo at the sand castle all over again. None of them wanted to win without each other, but there could only be one.

Grian having to relive the cactus circle all over again? Etho finally being present in what he called a family and having to make the decision to die or to kill? Cleo being comfortable and accepting these idiots, and now she has no choice but to do the unspeakable? It’s not like all three of them can win. In their minds it would always be the three of them, but in the Watcher’s minds, there can only be one.