butthurt at the moment. gonna go vomit my anger now.
to specifically all the people on here who whine, bitch, and BEG for contract from moots (LIKE ACTUALLY MAKING POSTS), just to ignore them after some time because 'oh, now I'm sick of people!! aha! ghosting now!' im sick and tired of you guys.
what? they've served their purpose, so you just ditch them? is that all those kind people meant to you?
i understand having social anxiety on the internet. i know it's difficult. but, if you do this, do you ever consider that someone put time and effort into reaching out to you? or do you just focus on yourself, and your own desire to feel... well... wanted, not realizing it's a two way street?
in my short time here, whenever i see a post from someone i know begging for asks, i usually try to reply with something organic. something thought provoking. something that can stimulate the mind, provide an interesting conversation, etc.
and if they ask for dms? i usually reach out to them if im not having a really shitty day.
i do this out of the goodness of my own heart. whatever goodness you think is left in my heart because who knows with the sheer variety of opinions on the internet. im not an angel, but if im up to it, i try. i think that counts for something.
every time i do this, to just get ignored, im fucking angry. im pissed. im hurt. i feel like jack twist driving up FOURTEEN HOURS to see ennis only for ennis to tell me that he's taking care of the kids this weekend so actually i gotta go home! that level of hurt.
yeah, i know it's a wild comparison to make. but this shit builds up. once or twice? eh. but on multiple occasions with different people, im really excessively upset.
maybe you guys think im sooo sociable, so cheerful, so whatever, you don't even think i have the capacity to feel these things. spoiler alert, i do.
im so close to giving up on these people whining for someone to reach out to them. i really am. but i cling to this hope that they'll appreciate it, start a conversation, etc etc.
but im tired. you guys (you know who you are) have drained me. nice. real nice. hope your proud of yourself, huh? give yourself a pat on the back. cute round of applause too.
feeling how i feel now, im gonna take a break from my main for a few days. ill still answer asks, though. the rps will still be up and running. and ill just recollect myself. that's all for now.
