All I wanted was some cookies. Was that so much to ask for? I worked an 8 hour shift today and I knew the only way I’d get to eat anything was to eat my two free cookies for the day here and there while I ran around and squirted mayo into bottles and dumped lettuce into bins. When I chanced upon a broken raspberry cheesecake cookie in the cookie try, I didn’t even hesitate to add it to my cookie meal.
In comes my asshole coworker who spends his time fucking underage girls, slapping my 17 year old sister’s ass, and objectifying every bit of every woman’s body. When he sees me on my second cookie, he exclaims “Erika, you’ve got to stop eating those! Pretty soon you’re going to look like Honey Boo Boo’s mom!”
For those who don’t know, he’s talking about the lovely Mama June from the show Honey Boo Boo:
With my mouth full of cookie, I say back “I don’t give a shit. She’s fucking beautiful.”
Now, he’s made comments like this before, but I’ve just tried to brush it off. Assholes will be assholes, right?
So a little while later when I start in on my third cookie, he once again makes a comment. “Stop eating those! That’s your third of the day! They’re bad for you!”
It wasn’t until I was putting fresh baked cookies away and one of them broke and he decided it was necessary to grab the cookie, yell “I’m taking this away so you won’t eat it!” and run to the back that I really got pissed off.
Listen. I KNOW that I’m a large girl. I understand that. It does not need to be pointed out to me. My body and my eating habits are my business and my business alone. I do not need you to try and control my eating. And don’t give me that bullshit about you doing it because you care about me, because I know you don’t give a shit about me. You’re doing it to humiliate me and make me feel bad about myself. I realize you don’t like the way my body looks, but guess what?
I do not give a single flying fuck what you think about my body.
I am fucking fabulous. I love myself from my head to my toes. My chunky thighs, wide hips, and bulging belly are all fucking beautiful. Nothing about my body is an open invitation for you to start criticizing it. Every time you have a thought about saying something to me about it, just punch yourself in the face as hard as you can, because that’s what you fucking deserve, you disgusting pig.
Fuck you. Fuck you and every other person who tried to make me feel bad about my body. I spent 20 years hating myself. I spent 4 years cutting myself to pieces because of my unwavering hate for myself. It’s people like you who feed into the constant objectification of women and unrealistic beauty standards. It’s people like you who make fat women feel like they have to cover up to save yourself the trouble of looking at our fat. Fuck you!
I’m over that part of my life. I’ve turned a new chapter. I’m on my way to loving myself and I will not let you stand in the way. So I called my boss, reported his ass, went home, ate a cookie, and didn’t give a single fuck.
To all my fat ladies out there: you’re fucking beautiful. Do not let anyone tell you differently. Embrace your beautiful body and love every inch. You deserve to be happy and trust me when I say that loving yourself is the first step.
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