The sum of every song in Hamilton
Alexander Hamilton: it me, ya boy ham
Aaron Burr, Sir pt. 1: hey Burr, we're both orphans and I'm really smart and I want to graduate college in 2.6 seconds like you
HEY ITS ME, YOUR GAY LOVE INTEREST, JOHN LAURENS
HEY ITS ME, LAFAYETTE I LOVE AMERICA AND I AM VERY FRENCH
HEY ITS ME, HERCULES MULLIGAN AND I HAVE SEX
HECK YAAA BBBOOOOOYSSSSSS WE ABT TO BE APART OF HISTORY
The story of tonight: were about to go to war but we have freedom and it's going to be great
ANGELICAAAA (work work) ELiZZA and leggy
Our boy ham straight up flames our British pal Sammy boy
You'll be back: meanwhile
, King George III is in Britain and is lying to himself
Burr: hey hi hello I exist
Alexandre: general washingmachine you called for me
George washingmachine: HAM YOU'RE HERE BE MY SECRETARY
The boys: WE ALL LIKE GIRLS
Angelica: I like alexandre
Angelica: oh okay *throws herself out of the window*
The story of tonight *reprise*: our boys ham, laurens, Hercules mulligan and Lafayette are really drunk
Wait for it: Burr is in politics but has no political opinion and nobody exactly knows what he's waiting for
A ham: daaad commme ooooon let me fiight
George washingmachine: ehhhhhhh I don't knooow let's send in lee
Charles Lee: IM A GENERAL WHEEEE
George washingmachine: that was a mistake
Ten duel commandments: Lauren's wants to duel lee because he was being salty towards our favorite dad, George washing machine, and they do and Lee gets shot
George washingmachine: wtf ham
Alexandre: lee started it
George washingmachine: son stop
George washingmachine: go home
*A REALLY FAST RAP BY OUR FAVORITE FRENCH BOY LAYETTE*
General washingmachine: hey alexandre pls come back
History has its eyes on you:
George washingmachine: hey son, if you make any mistakes everyone in the future will probably only focus on that
The colonies: HEY WE WON THE WAR
King George III: haha good luck running a country lol see ya
Burr: I had a baby girl she's cute and her name is theodosia
Ham: LOOK AT MY SON I HAD A KID LOOK AT HIM HES GREAT I LOVE HIM AND HIS NAME IS PHILIP
Burr: Alexandre why can't you shut up
Alexandre: look I wrote 51 essays in 2 seconds to defend the US constitution
Thomas Jefferson: hey I'm back from France
Everyone: TOMMY J HEY YOU'RE BACK
Thomas Jefferson: your financial plan is dumb
Ham: ur dumb I don't agree
Washingmachine: Alexandre calm down
Washingmachine: they right you need to calm down
Eliza & Angelica: stop writing for once and leave with us to go somewhere
Eliza &angelica: wow fuk u 2 then
Mariah Reynolds: my husbands abusive please have an affair w/ me
Ham: I guess I have no choice okay I will
James Reynolds: ur having an affair with my wife give me money
The room where it happens:
Ham: I'm having a meeting with James and Thomas
Ham: we're deciding where the capital is
Schuyler defeated: burr is now senator instead of hamiltons father in law and ham is salty abt it
Jefferson: lets help France with their war
Ham: wat no not another war
Washingmachine: he's right
Thomas: wtf of course you take his side
Jefferson: I don't like Alexandre
Madison: he wouldn't be so high up w/ out Washington
Jefferson: lets ruin his career
Washingmachine: oops I'm not president anymore
King George III: what john Adams is the president now lol good luck
The Adams administration:
Madison, burr &Jefferson: you took government funds ur career is over
Ham: lol no I just cheated on my wife
Ham: I've fought everyone, except for myself
Ham: I guess I'll change that
Alexandre: Time to publish the details of my affair before anyone else for some reason and ruin my marriage
Eliza: hey wtf Alexandre ur the worst
Philip: I'm really smart and I just graduated
Philip: hey wait George Eacker just said somthin mean abt my dad alexandre
Philip: hey Eacker lets duel
Philip: *aims gun at sky hoping that Eacker won't shoot and no one will die*
Hey this looks the the perfect opportunity to not shoot
Eacker: how bout I do AnYWAy
Alexandre: hey our son is dead and I'm sorry
Eliza: I accept your apology
Madison: hey burr is probably going to win the election
Madison: if Alexandre likes you over burr you could win
Burr: wow everyone likes me
Everyone: Jefferson or Burr
Oh look Jefferson is president now
Burr: ham you cause all my problems
Ham: that sounds like a YOU problem
Best of wives, best of women:
Eliza: u better not be having an affair
The world was wide enough:
Burr: oops I killed ham I didn't mean too
Who lives, who dies who tells, who tells your story:
Everyone: :( Alexandre died
Eliza: I'm going to tell his story :)