hotel shit show

enjoy your stay at the hotel shit show.

[fuckingfuckmeup]

it’s gone again the will to go on

i’ve lost her again the girl that smiles smiles at herself smiles at the mirror

she’s gone again

i wish i knew where i wish i knew why

[fuckingfuckmeup]

i lost myself again.

[fuckingfuckmeup]

too little, too late

i saw her in the distance coming closer and closer

she was love and happiness she was confidence and health

but something went wrong something scared her away so suddenly she turned and bolted the other way

i screamed and i cried begging her to stay but by then it was too late

i should have held her closer i should have cherished our time looking in the mirror and loving what i saw taking a photo and adoring the beautiful shape

now that she’s gone now that she’s so far away i’m begging for her to return

i need her back but i fear she’s been gone too long

i’m losing hope at this rate i fear i’ve lost her forever

-a letter to the girl that graced me with her presence last year, but suddenly disappeared. “a healthier me. mind, body, and soul”

[extramadness]

[agonisingpain]

[fuckingfuckmeup]

it can be hard to stick with it, but it’s inspiring to see other’s do it

[fuckingfuckmeup]

it's tiring repeating myself. i know you still aren't listening and that i'll have to say it all again.

a tired, tired girl

[fuckingfuckmeup]

habitual

you stifled my craving helped me to lose weight

you taught me to relax showed me the way

but now you singe my lungs taking years off my life

between you and starvation i’m destined to die

you’re a filthy habit one i can’t seem to kick

i hate you so much and you’ll love me to death

[fuckingfuckmeup]

letter to myself

i miss that girl that toxic girl

i miss her waist her legs her face

i miss that girl that toxic girl

i miss her strength her weak, weak strength

she had the power to stay so slim

she was fading out in a toxic way

now she’s faded away in a healthy way

[immadsadbruh]

[fuckingfuckmeup]

i hate that. “well then you must think ____ is obese because they weigh more than you.”

my eating disorder isn’t judging anyone but me. saying those things only makes me feel worse. it isn’t helping anything.

[fuckingfuckmeup]

i miss my thin legs

my legs used to be so thin, specifically my thighs. i miss it. i don’t know how to get my thin thighs back without dropping fifteen pounds.

they have that funny shape where the top is bigger than the bottom. they used to be the same size throughout my entire thigh. i miss it so much.

i would exercise to get them back to the shape i desire, but i fear them bulking up even more with muscle.

i’m fine with my belly. it could be thinner, but i can still get a good angle of it. my arms aren’t great, but i’m sure a little exercise would help without causing them to gain that extra bulk.

how do i get my thin thighs back? i miss loving the way they looked.

[fuckingfuckmeup]

kitty cat is photogenic on his own terms.

[sincerely-mh]

[dreamyeyescloudymind-deactivate]