- Hey it's fuenn! - I'm 19 and in art college now wow -
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Let's help my friend, Bilal Salah (@bilal-salah0)! He is a 22 year old Palestinian who is living in Germany. Unfortunately, his stay there has been nothing but awful. He has been evicted and terminated from his work as immigration revokes his visa. He finds himself getting deported! Since then, he has been searching for a lawyer, a place to stay, and work to do, while he raises funds for his family's evacuation.
You can read more about it here.
Now, things are looking up for him. He will no longer be deported, and he has found an apartment to live in! At the same time, I have been speaking to Bilal over the past week or so. He is such an incredible person. He has been telling me, along with showing me pictures, of how much time and effort he makes the best out of his situation. He is learning German, searching for a job, studying for his driver’s license, and has been teaching me how to speak Palestinian Arabic! And he is doing all of this at 22 years old!
Despite it all, Bilal has informed me that his former employer has extorted €4,800, claiming that he still owes them money. This leaves Bilal with no other option but to withdraw funds from his campaign since he does not have income. He also has to pay for expensive transfer fees to send money to his family in Ghazzah!
Click here to read more about it.
So please show him compassion and kindly give what you can. He works so hard, carrying so much on his shoulders, and it would be great if we could lift the burden! We need to raise the total amount of €110,000 by September 15th. Let’s try to achieve it before then!
As of writing this, €103,909 has been raised!
There is only €6,091 left to go and 8 days remaining!
Shahed muhammed is a 20 yr old who is trying to raise funds to save herself and her family. Her father is a heart patient and her younger siblings are suffering from severe hepatitis from the polluted water of Gaza.
She has only raised 14.3k out 50k she needs.
With rumours of rafah crossing opening up soon, shahed has very little time left to evacuate her little siblings out of Gaza, if not herself and her parents, so they can get to safety and have access to the medical treatment they need.
SHAHED HAS TO GET TO 30K BY NEXT WEEK
WHAT YOU CAN DO TO HELP:
For just $5, donate to shahed's gfm so you can enter the raffle being conducted at @journalsforpalestine by @turian and stand to win one of these lovely journals. All of them will be shipped internationally.
Have you ever experienced seeing your dream broken in front of your eyes and not being able to do … Shahed Muhammad needs your support for H
This gfm was verified and appears on the list of vetted fundraisers maintained by hussein @/el-shab-hussein and nairuz @/nabulsi (#224) so please dont hesitate to share and donate!
6 VERIFIED PALESTINIAN FUNDRAISERS WITH LESS THAN 10% OF THE MONEY RAISED (part 4)
I would like to bring attention to the fundraisers that are struggling to get any donations. Unfortunately they are a lot so I'm starting with ten of them. These are all verified by el-shab-hussein and nabulsi and you can find all of them, and many others, in this list.
Hello
Hello my name is Mahmoud Halas and I am a Palestinian living in Ga… Mahmoud Helles a besoin de votre soutien pour Helping my famil
Dear Friends and Supporters,
Hello, my name is Samira, I ‘am facing an unthinkable c… Samira Akkila needs your support for Help us to su
Hello,
My name is Bridget and I'm managing this fundraiser for Raghad and her family. Raghad and… Bridget Pallas needs your support for Hel
القصة مترجمة.أسفل
Dreams have been postponed indefinitely!
Have you … Nada Abed needs your support for HELP ! FOR EVERYONE HAS an O
Hi all,
My name is Rawda, based in Montreal, Canada, and I a… Rawda Harb needs your support for Please help Majdi and Amira Al Shamaly &
Hello,,
"I am Youssef,From Belgium writing on behalf of my b… Yousef j s Alanqar needs your support for Help Mohammed and His Family Escape
Average Neuvillette yandere tag fic: Sad dragon, lonely dragon, yearns for affection, tries to understand human compassion, dragon possesion instinct
Average Wriothesley yandere tag fic: IMPRISONMENT, POWER ABUSE, CAPTIVITY, DESIREEE, THE ONLY PLACE YOU BELONG TO IS WITH ME UNDER THE SEA GRRGHHHHH WOOF WOOF AAWWUUUUUUUUU
Summary: Part 2 to There is no love here.: Neuvillette did want to let you, he didn't want to lose what he already had but also tried to make it grow into something more. He didn't realize that he had already destroyed it.
Warnings/tags: Yandere themes, fem!reader, arrange marriage, one-sided love, unrequited love, unrequited pining, jealousy, possessive behavior, angsty, creepy Neuvillette watching you sleep, 6.1k words
Late in the night he could not help but stare, your closed eyes sleeping so peacefully in your own bed away from his own. Was this normal... for a husband and wife to sleep away from each other? In different rooms as if they were strangers. Silent questions darkly swirl in his mind, he felt almost broken as he watched your sleeping form. His strength seeped away too quickly as he could not help but crave your touch.
He stayed there, for how long he doesn't remember. Unable to leave your side yet never touching as if scared that this world that he lived in would crack and shatter. He could not move at all, not even when you start to stir your eyes slowly fluttering open.
"Hmmm... you are awake" Pushing yourself from the bed slowly with one arm to support your body. He didn't answer silently, looking at you as you yawned and rubbed your eyes. Looking to the side, the window you could see the dark dreary sky as rain fell from the darkened clouds.
He watched as you looked at him, eyes still sleepy and tired yet there was also understanding. Did you understand that he was crying for you? He doubted it, yet he could not help but hold his breath.
That same hand that rubbed you rubbed your eyes was tiredly raised towards him, the palm down as if you were reaching for him.
Neuvillette looked at your hands reaching out towards the air, awkward and unsure of what to do at this moment. Was he supposed to take your hand and hold you up when he was caught sneaking into your room? When he didn't make a move, he watched your eyes still sleepy and hazy, soon giving up as you pushed yourself out of the bed by yourself to the floor. Your slippers were forgotten as you rubbed your eyes again to get more of your sleep out.
He thought that you would ask him again why he was here, if not you would ask him if he was okay and to talk... Yet instead of talking you took his hand and pulled him away from your bedside, leading him out of the room.
Your hand holding his, Neuvillette started at your hand so foreign on his. It was odd and uncomfortable. Why? He didn't understand why he thought so when he had escorted you many times even in the past and even now. What was he thinking back then? When you were by his side. You would wrap your arm around his own or how he would take your hand to support you when you walked out of a vehicle or steep stairs.
Then he realized that this was the first time that the two of you held each other's hands bare without any leather gloves or dress gloves covering each other's hands.
Your hands, well taken care of were soft and delicate, unlike his calloused and rough hands always working and writing. The feeling of your hand in his was unique, unlike anything else that he ever held, it was something that made his heart beat.
Your hold on his hand was light, still tired from your sleep. If he wanted it with just a little strength he could break out from your grasp yet instead he made sure that you would keep holding his hand. His body tensed thinking that you would drop his hand because of the lack of strength. He didn't want that. He didn't want that at all.
Time was either too fast or too slow, Neuvillette wasn't sure as you and him went out of your bedroom and into the kitchen yet he could only wish for it to be a little longer. He could not help but almost voice his want when your hand dropped his. As if the coldness of Fontaine's night made his hand become ice without your hand.
He watched you silently, too awkward to speak for once he wanted to say something yet could not as if his tongue was tied into multiple ribbons too complicated to unknot. You seem not to care for this silence as if you were already so used to this. Why were you so used to this? Why didn't you look surprised at all that he was here?
The clicking of pots and pans, and the sound of pouring water in the dimly lit kitchen was all he could hear as you started to boil water to prepare tea and also plate some desserts.
He watched you place the teapot on the table, also getting teacups and a plate for something to eat. Taking a seat on the opposite side of the table you took a sip of your tea staying quiet. Neuvillette examined you as you drank your tea, tiredness still evident in your eyes but the sleepiness was all gone.
He continued to stare at you, and you let him. He doesn't know how long you and him have been in the kitchen, yet the tea that was steaming hot had now cooled in his hand as you looked at him. Your eyes were calm and inviting, inviting him to tell his thoughts, to still the anxiety tinted in his eyes.
But for the first time, he didn't want to. You didn't know these confusing and obsessive thoughts, dark and muddy, unlike the clear waters of Fontaine. He dreaded the idea that you would ever find out…It disgusted him so much that he was like this yet he was still unable to control these emotions.
"I am okay now... I... I apologize for disturbing your sleep." Neuvillette apologized only for you to shake your head, the soft smile on your lips was enough to tell him that you would do it again. That it was okay to look for you.
It was okay you told him, a soft voice that promised to be by his side whenever he felt lonely or needed help. He could not help but wonder just for a moment if he impulsively asked would you listen? If he asked you to stay by his side every single moment never to leave him would you do it?
It was later that you told him that he would look for you late at night when stress had been catching up to him. This was not the first time you had woken up with him right beside your bed.
Neuvillette could not help but sometimes watch you from his seat when trials were held, high up the court it was easy to see you in the corner of a front seat that he had arranged for you. Sometimes you would visit the Opera Epiclese to watch a trial of your interest. While not often you would ask him to reserve a seat for you if there was a spare. Even back then he made sure you would have a seat however now he would offer you a seat there hoping that you would accept it.
Neuvillette could not help but hope for those moments to happen more often sometimes as when he finally had the free time you would often come with either a packed or bought lunch, dinner, or just snacks for the two of you. That on those stressful moments, he could relax just for a moment with you by his side.
Sometimes you would tell him of something that happened while you were coming here, or maybe you told him the show that you watched with the tickets he had gotten you just a week ago. Mindless chatter it would be hard to go into something deep or important without the privacy of home or his office. Not when people were always looking at you and him.
But he could not help but listen wholeheartedly, keeping all your words in mind, feeling almost like he was in a trance as he watched you talk. The light danced in your eyes in amusement at the story you were telling. The smile that graced your lips as you recall the memory. There was nothing more beautiful than that for him.
"What do you want?" Neuvillette asked, words finally pushed out of his lips like removing the boulder that was stuck in his throat that had been there for a very long time. You looked surprised at his sudden question, tilting your head as you covered your mouth with your hand.
"Pardon?"
"Is there something you would like to have?" Neuvillette asked again patiently waiting for an answer, yet his hold on his pen was tight as he wondered what you were going to say. The answer didn't come immediately, instead, you were deep in thought.
Both of you were in his office while he worked on a few documents. You were at the other side of the room reading a book when he suddenly asked that question.
It was not often he would ask this question, most of the things you touched in shops and stores all fell into your hands the next day when you first got married a long time ago to the point that you had to nag him to stop this. Neuvillette wanted to keep the promise to your parents that he would give you everything that the meka following you had recorded all the things you looked and touched. It was overdone, and rather than happy and satisfied you told Neuvillette that this wasn't what they meant.
He still bought gifts but not as many as before after that, both sides compromising to certain degrees that you would accept them while he would not suddenly send over 30 boxes of articles of clothing in one day. If you absolutely needed something you got it by yourself, though rarely would you need something so expensive. So in a sense you were satisfied with what you have, you have nothing you necessarily want.
Yet expressing that you could not understand his reaction, silent for a moment as he nodded at your words.
"Alright..."
You didn't understand why he was acting like this and when you heard a knock on the door you left glancing back once in wonder and concern but in the end, forgetting about that moment. Neuvillette watched you from the corner of his eyes, whatever expectations he had crushed when he thought that there was a chance that you would ask for something else. This delusion that he tried to weakly make that you want what he wanted just as desperately.
Yes... that chance was one in a million something that was never going to be.
Just for a moment, Neuvillette had become bitter about the whole situation.
Still hot to the touch you waited for it to cool down and instead took a cookie from the tray as you looked up at the people passing by at the outdoor cafe seats. This was usually one of your personal times alone, something that you often told him about when you saw something interesting that happened that day. You enjoyed such hobbies, still finding interest in humans and their minds alike even after marriage.
Unlike before, he was here this time.
It wasn't the first time in a hundred years that you and he went out. He took the time every so often to be with you still, even if it wasn't the lovey-dovey couples date that the novels love to express they were still enjoyable enough. It took care of most rumors or whatever people love to think of. You were always like that, even in an arranged marriage you cared about his reputation not wanting any rumors to tarnish it.
It wasn't something he expected to be honest at first, when you told him so long ago that you would never love him. He didn't think you could go this far. But you did because he was your husband... even if you didn't love him.
Sometimes you and he would go for a walk around Fontaine, the Melusine ones that have a trill for adventure or maybe stumbled into an area would often tell you and him about the some pretty areas that you didn't get the chance to see before. You and Neuvillette would listen to them when they talked to you, both of you with soft smiles sometimes making mental notes for presents. Those lead to small shopping dates between the two of you and for others to see.
Some shopkeepers were familiar with your visits, and asking if you were searching for something in imparticular with your husband had created an image of him being more than a judge. Someone who was soft in heart. (Though that image would quickly be forgotten when they were forced to stand trial under his watchful eyes. That image just never sticks for long...)
Other times he would tell you of shows and events happening around the Opera Epiclese when there was a lack of trials asking if you were interested in joining stating that he would reserve a seat for the both of you which more often than not you accepted.
This was enough for you.
There was never more to it, aside from a few times you ate out at restaurants which would not result in much as the two of you would return home for the night or he would abruptly get called due to some serious matter.
How odd it was for you Neuvillette noticed that he started joining your many walks alone around the Court of Fontaine. Usually, he would tell you that he needed paperwork to be done yet not as much anymore. Instead, now he was demanding those moments with you.
Most times you would tell him where you would go now he would ask, his voice a little sharp when he saw you dressing up but didn't tell him where you would go. There was a tint of accusation in his voice which he was able to hide, yet his eyes hardened as he asked why you were taking the time to dress. He could not hide his anxiety though, a pained tone of voice barely hidden away.
something he didn't ask often he would now constantly would ask you if you would be visiting him. Seeing that he asked you did say that you visited a few times, but you still remembered that one time you declined stating that your schedule was unfortunately rather full that day. His eyes dyed with hurt and anxiety.
It was more often that rain fell high from the sky, more often that you would look at him worried. It felt that both you and him were walking on eggs, yet he could not help himself not when you would look at him more often than before. That he had occupied your mind. That you were by his side. That you were looking at him.
That he was in your world.
"Is there something in my face?" Neuvillette asked, looking at you with that solemn look on his face. You knew what he looked like when he smiled, a soft look as his eyes lightened up was just the opposite of what you were looking at right now. What were you looking at now?
"No. I apologize." You shook your head leaning on your chair a little more. Looking elsewhere but at him, for a moment he could not help but inwardly frown the bottom of his chest frustration and unease curled only to be gone the moment you looked at him again looking as if you were reminded of something. "How was work?" You asked, taking a sip of your tea right after.
".... Nothing much has happened apart from the trials that I told you." Neuvillette frowned thinking, there was nothing that was interesting to talk about his work. Nothing was more interesting to him than you.
Even when you asked about Furina the Hydro archon you have gotten a rather blunt answer that she was doing well. He didn't care much for her either, yet he could not help but stop for a moment.
When you asked him about Wriothesley, the muscles in his face all stiffened while his eyes narrowed. "May I ask why you are asking about him?" He asked his hands holding the teacup, his back straightening. It was as if one wrong word would cause something horrible to happen.
You could not help but raise an eyebrow at his question but you didn't say anything, "I am just wondering, his work is something related to yours after all. I have met him a few times too and I do adore the small dear right beside him." Small cute red eyes looked at you curiously the first time you met. It was easy to get close to her as the two of you would talk about her stories and thoughts.
You didn't see the expression on Neuvillette's face but you did hear his answer. "Wriothesley is doing fine. His work isn't easy but he is always alert and keeps an eye on the prisoners... Would that be a fitting answer?" You casually nodded at his question, taking a sip from your drink. The waiter soon arrived with another teapot with hot tea.
Neuvillette could not find a way to calm himself, as he stared at his tea. His mind was going around in crazy circles almost drowning in his thoughts. The idea that another man was in your thoughts was a vile feeling as if some sort of sticky sludge clung to his chest never letting go.
It was nauseating.
But he kept them in his heart, never letting those feelings out no matter what. It wouldn't do any good to tell less you think that he was accusing you. Whatever your relationship was he felt like it was only standing on a thin line that one wrong step at that moment would break it.
It scared him, it scared him so much that suddenly you would look at him instead towards another man. When you looked at him he would see nothing there but only recognition and friendliness that he didn't want. That he was worth nothing more than the man.
"Dear...? Dear." Your voice snapped him out of his thoughts, concern in your eyes. He blinked for a moment realizing that he had zoned out and that you had been talking to one of Steambird's journalists, Charlotte. Both you and her had concern evident in your faces, looking at each other and then at him again.
"I am fine... Thank you for your concern."
He reassured you and her that he was fine, and while Charlotte chose to believe it thinking that work was just catching up to him it seemed that you didn't believe them.
You were sharp, or maybe it was because you had been his wife for such a long time. Neuvillette wondered if you knew his thoughts and if he would like you to actually know what he was thinking… yet at the same time to him it was a terrible thought.
Yet it seemed that there was a small surprise today.
Charlotte's eyes sparkled as she looked at you and him, pushing her glasses as she readied her kamera. "It might be too much to ask but I was wondering if I could get a show of affection between you two, a kiss on the cheek or something." Her request startled the two of you, eyes widening a little at what she wanted.
"Unlike before we are now starting to see you and Neuvillette started to spend more time together. We often see you holding each other's arms but never more than that people are curious if you guys even show affection towards each other!!" Charlotte explained. She tried to say it as casually as possible yet Neuvillette saw the seriousness in her eyes. This would be a huge scoop if it would actually happen.
"Sorry dear, but this is a little too embarrassing for me." You apologized to Charlotte, a hesitant smile on your face as you turned down Charlotte's request. Neuvillette watched as you gently yet vaguely answered her, kindly giving a reason as to why you didn't want to do such a thing. Most would say to mind their own business that whatever they do should not be something that they should care about.
But you and he were in the end likened to idols or celebrities to some degree and no matter what you do people would watch and judge for themselves, snapping back at them would only cause a negative image rather than be helpful. You seemed to know that very well after being married to the Chief Justice for a long time now.
However, Neuvillette could not help but wonder if that was what you really think. If you wouldn't mind doing that sort of display in front of others if you truly loved that person. One where you were loved and kissed even in the privacy of just the two of you instead of sleeping in separate bedrooms in a loveless arranged marriage.
He always found it awkward to be in the public eye often. Other than a few specific reasons or important schedules Neuvillette doesn't show himself much. But here he was right beside you, following you as you shopped and walked around the city as you often do.
He watched your eyes always taking in the beauty of human life around you. It wasn't something that he particularly noticed before only thinking that you and him were similar in some ways but unlike him people were more willing to come closer to you, willing to talk to you more than him. The friendly eyes, as they greet you familiar towards your visit only for their eyes to widen when they see him. It made his heart bitter again, far too often that he realized again and again that he was not in your world.
Even between you and the Steambird journalist Charlotte. It seems that the two of you were also close judging from the closeness of both of you or how Charlotte while still a journalist was rather comfortable around you and you around her. He wondered who else you knew, who else you were close to.
Was there someone in there you had eyes for?
Who could be potentially someone who could take you away from him? The muscles in his face stiff again at the thought that someone could potentially take you and you would accept their love… rather than his. That you would abandon him freed from the contract of a marriage without a single lick of love.
That night there was heavy rain till early morning.
"Excuse me miss, may I join you for tea?"
You turned your head away from the street and looked to your side to see a young man smiling at you holding a cup of his own drink. Ginger hair with a boyish smile. Yet his smile didn't reach his eyes, lifeless and dull. His clothes also told you that he was not from here, but instead from another nation.
Examining him for a moment you lifted up your teacup taking a sip. Your eyes narrowed at his figure. He was quick to pick up your reaction, "Ah miss please, I have just arrived from Snezhnaya and am looking for a place to rest. All the tables are full here in the cafe." His eyes lingered for a moment on your ring as if he acknowledged that he noticed the ring on your finger and didn't have any hidden intentions of that sort. When you both met eyes he gave you a closed-eye cheeky smile when you dropped your guard just a bit.
You thought for a moment but in the end, you let him sit, having no reason to be greedy over an empty chair and space on the table.
"Thank you." The young man smiled.
He was quite the chatter while sharp enough never to talk about sensitive topics he had told you about many places around Teyvat that he had visited. You had also asked him a few questions of your own, curious to many of his stories. It was easy to talk to him, time passed quickly as he told you of the many people that he met. "I in particular like the traveler. You must have heard about them seeing that they are making a name for themself wherever they go."
"Aside from your love for fights, you seem to have an interest in people." What was his name that he told you to call him... Childe? Childe had a curious look on his face with a tint of mischievousness at your words. "Oh, that is a first. What made you think so?"
You hummed touching the teapot, the liquid had become cold. You would need to call the server soon. "Humans are fascinating." You admitted vaguely.
"For someone curious like you it is hard to believe that you have only stayed in Fontaine most of your life." Childe stared at you, it was obvious that he knew who you were and he knew that you knew him. A harbinger and the wife of the chief justice, what an odd pair to be drinking tea together.
But even then, it seemed that even if the two of you knew who each other was, there was still a hint of friendliness while a little fake was still easy to get used to. Yes... Right now you were just strangers talking to each other. "Haha, you are a very interesting person." he chuckled, leaning on the chair with a sly smile on his face but you could see the genuine amusement in his eyes.
"I know, how about I show you around next time. I will show you the best places that I found in each nation that I have been to." Childe raised his hand with a grin on his face. "I think we get along splendidly from this small chat. We would be amazing travel partners if you ever decide to travel. Plus you get to see more people, which is not limited to hmmmm... here."
There were a lot of implications in his words, more sensitive people would have taken offense to his words yet you stayed still. Thinking for a moment...
It wasn't like you never thought of it, while not with a harbinger but maybe traveling alone, seeing and meeting people. Fontaine people have a unique view of life compared to other nations that you have noticed when you chatted with those outside of Fontaine. But in the end, you declined his offer after chatting a little more, both of you parted ways. Childe had mentioned that he would not mind chatting with you a little more next time and would join your table if he finds you here again.
Saying your goodbyes you started to head home when you saw your husband at a corner of a shop. Zoned out and deep in thought, yet quick to notice you. "You... you are here. Did work finish early?" You asked him, walking to his side surprised that he was here.
There was a moment of silence as he looked at you.
For a moment again you thought you saw something in his eyes, a kind of madness swirling deep within that you never once saw in your life married to him. His hold over your arm was tight, almost clinging yet not enough to point out.
It was like a crack, a sound that could not be heard, a thing that could not be seen. Neuvillette could not let you go as if the anxiety had finally taken over and destroyed whatever limits he had placed. That moment he realized that you could actually leave him than just his own mind imagining that situation broke him. Even you were startled but how forward he became, desperate to be by your side, desperate to keep you there.
At home, he would follow you and outside when work didn't force him to come to the office as soon as possible, he took all your personal space. Even outside he was no better, his hand holding your wrist as he took you with him to his office. He didn't want you out of his sight, not one moment.
Dreading that even for a moment someone else could take it.
It was stressful...
Stressful for both of you. You tried to calmly bring the topic out, try to understand why Neuvillette was acting like that but he would just not budge. He refused to talk, to explain why he was acting like this.
Both sides were stressed. On one side it was a silent desperation, shown by rough actions while the other side could not understand, trying but lost. Neuvillette knew he was causing a strain in this relationship. Yet he didn't know what to do, he didn't have anyone to talk to, no one to ask who could help. It drove him insane as he clung to you while demanding that you stay by his side.
It took a moment, just a moment for it to crack. For everything to shatter, the moment he saw your eyes, that moment he saw you starting to lose hope. Eyes that started to become frustrated, and so close to bursting.
He let go of your hand as if it burned him...
As you grabbed your wrist pain in your eyes he finally understood that he had made a mistake. This relationship that he desperately wanted to keep and grow had shattered into a million pieces. There was no way that he could fix this anymore.
He could not help but stare at your sleeping form, thinking about whatever that you and he had in the past. The two of you were never a normal couple, it wasn't a marriage out of love but there was something else there. A tenderness and gentleness between you even without that love.
He just could not remember them, he could not remember those moments when he had become so obsessed with this unrealistic relationship that he could not have. It hurt him. It hurt him so much that he had hurt you.
He watched you steer from your slumber, the dark circles under your eyes prominent over the worry of this relationship that he had caused a strain to. Even when you woke up he didn't move from his spot.
"Please..."
In the dead of night, you stare at Neuvillette in surprise, a cautiousness that was once never there. He felt dirty, so dirty that no water could ever clean him from this feeling.
"Please... don't leave me..." He begged and begged again, "Please... Please love me." He wanted nothing more than to burn himself yet he could not… he was scared to ever leave your side. He was desperate. He was greedy. Slowly he got on his knees, his shaky hand reached for your hand and placed his forehead on it.
"I do not understand." You said he could hear the hesitation in your voice, the hurt that he had made. His head was still down, as he held onto your hand tightly but not enough to hurt you. It was desperate, there was fear as you watched his hands and arms shake. You could feel a warm wetness in your skin, not like the cold rain that fell from the sky.
"Please..." his gasping words were so broken and pained. You tried to pull away, your mind was still so confused and alert. Yet your hand didn't budge for he was scared that the moment he let go you would become nothing more than vapor.
"Wha.... What happened to you." Your voice was low and cautious yet at the same time still worried for the man that was supposed to be your husband, the man who was supposed to love you. You looked down at him from your bed, him on the floor as he continued to hold your arm, his head still down.
From outside the window, the howling wind and heavy rain knocked the house roof and windows. It looked like those fairytales of knights sneaking into the princess's quarters just to pledge their loyalty to her.
But it was far from it.
"Please love me... Love me and don't leave me... I will give- do anything… anything you ask. I love you so much. Please do not abandon me." His deep voice tried to stay calm but there was just so much turmoil in it.
You were silent, silent and frozen to his words. He could not look at you. He didn't want to see your reaction. He didn't want to see disgust and hatred in your face. Any moment you would pull your hand away and anger in your voice as you told him to get out. He would not know what to do then. He didn't want to let go.
But instead of that, instead of pushing him away, you moved your free hand to hold his face. Gently pushing him to look at you, guided by your hand he could not help but have his breath leave him as he looked at your tired smile. So beautiful, and stunning under the dim lights from the outside street lamps.
"Neuvillette... I would never abandon you. Why would you ever think that." You loudly whispered, clear but Neuvillette could not believe his ears.
"This marriage was not decided by love but arranged..." Words were leaving his mouth before he could think, he wanted to stop himself, stop himself before you could truly leave him. But he could not stop. "When you truly fall in love your heart will be with them. I fear... I fear that you would leave me at that moment if you find that something irreplaceable."
You stayed quiet at his words, thinking, yet pause seemed to cause fear in his heart as he looked up towards you. He wanted to confirm if he really was correct. If your face hinted at anything of that sort of secret that you were hiding. What must he do to make you stay? What should he do to keep you with him? To keep whoever in your heart away from you. Send them away? Accuse them of false changes so that he could send them away never in your sight?
Never in his life did he ever have such thoughts yet even after living for long he could not calm the fear that was bursting out. What does he have to do to keep you here? That harbinger who invited you to travel with him all of Teyvat, were you interested in him? What must he do to keep you from leaving? Should he shackle you here so that only he could see you and your eyes could only look at him? His eyes could not help but widen and his thoughts halted when you touched his face placing a kiss on the crown of his head.
The warmth still lingered even as you pulled away, which sent a shiver down his spine. Your hand was comforting on his cheek... Neuvillette truly couldn't let go of this warmth, he could not. It was as if he wished he could dig deep into your warmth and stay there, he wanted nothing more than your touch, he wanted nothing more than your love.
You called out his name, as you pushed his wet hair away from his face. "You are right that this marriage was made from an arrangement and not from love. But like you promised my parents you took care of me and gave me many things. You continue to care for me and I also saw many sides of you. The Melusines adores you and also loves you like a father. I saw that. You are busy and have done many things but still have in mind me your wife, always making time to talk and be with me."
You continue to list more and more things that you have experienced by his side yet instead of finding comfort, tears fell from his eyes as he was again reminded that he unknowingly threw away everything.
"Stay... stay forever with me," Neuvillette asked again, pushing his face to your hand. When you nodded, a soft whisper of ‘yes’ did his hands finally let up the strength from the tight hold on your arm. gently you placed his head on your lap as he hugged your waist. His hold was tight but you didn't mind as you started to comb his hair with your fingers.
This was not okay, he knew that this was not alright yet... for now, this was enough for him. Later on, this would spiral more and more down as he watched himself demand more and beg more but for now, this was okay, that he had your promise that you would never leave him.
This much was enough for now.
Note: This took a while to write so I hope you enjoyed reading this! There will also be no part 3 to this for those curious~
Edit1: So there ended up being a part 3 to this which is here: link anyway hope you enjoy the story!
One thing I've constantly seen in Jade hate posts is the idea that she's trapping good and innocent people like Aventurine and Topaz and chaining them down to the IPC.
But I actually think it's this act--choosing Aventurine and Topaz to be her proteges--that tells us a lot about whether Jade is a fundamentally bad person or not.
First, it's key to understand that Jade is in a significant position of power within the Stonehearts. When Diamond chooses not to appear, it's often Jade who goes in his place and acts as his voice. When it comes to making administrative decisions on who will get to join the Stonehearts, Jade had a direct hand in supporting Topaz's ascension (by accepting recommendations) and an even more direct role in Aventurine's ascension, choosing and testing him for the job herself.
So Jade is a character with enough power to have a strong say in who gets to become a leader in the IPC. She possesses enough authority and trust from Diamond to catapult a wanted murderer like Kakavasha straight up 45 ranks in the Star Rail universe's single most powerful corporate entity. She helps to decide who rules.
And who has she picked with that power?
Aventurine and Topaz are both good people. Although they'll do whatever is needed to advance the IPC's aims, they're both essentially kind-hearted and unwilling to put others at unnecessary risk. They both deeply value friendship and exhibit many of the other positive traits one associates with heroes--loyalty, generosity, gentleness, and honesty. Topaz takes a hit to her own reputation and rank to protect Belobog. Aventurine, infamous for high-stakes gambles, specifically spells out that he absolutely refuses to cheat his way to victory.
In an organization that is otherwise known for the literal colonization and extermination of civilizations--in an organization that puts wealth and material value above anything but their own god--in an organization with people like Obsidian who literally want to turn things into a bloodbath--Jade's top picks are both quintessentially good characters.
She is extracting value from them. She is profiting from their work for the IPC.
But Jade had the power to promote complete monsters into the Stonehearts. She could have picked heartless, profit-driven villains who would have forwarded the IPC's goals at the expense of the human element entirely. She could have promoted more evil into an already evil organization. But she did not. Jade chose to support two disadvantaged young people who had clawed their way up from the bottom while still maintaining their principles. At least two of the Ten Stonehearts are people the Trailblazer can associate with without extreme moral guilt, thanks in part to Jade.
The people that Jade chooses to throw her support behind mean something. Topaz and Aventurine's presence in the Stonehearts indicates that Jade is capable of not only recognizing goodness--but has actively chosen to elevate (at least relatively) moral people into positions of authority. This act, choosing to promote and support inherently decent human beings, speaks greatly to Jade's sense of who deserves power--and, from there, to her own sense of justice.
I whole heartedly believe Jade somewhat is trying to get more inherently good people on the IPC leader position, because there are already so much corrupt IPC executives/division leader that does not aligned with the true meaning of Preservation (because specific IPC executives/leader like Oswaldo has colonized and destroyed civilization for the sake of profiting from their planet/race. Which these are the literal opposite of what Preserving is all about). Reason why she takes people like Topaz and Aventurine under her wings is so that other than being good people inside, they became very-capable leader within the IPC too.
I think Jade is like Gojo about the whole raising potential younger generation to be stronger and one day topple over the old generations that are corrupt
ok listen to me. a long time ago aha made a worm really smart and tried to get it into the genius society. but even though that worm was smart as hell, nous did not give a fuck about it.
you know who else is smart as hell but nous doesnt give a fuck about?
heh. yeah. thats right. despite many people (including himself) feeling like nous should have recognized him a loooong time ago, that computer just doesn’t care.
now, we are left to wonder… why does nous refuse to acknowledge this man..?
i think it’s quite obvious.
my theory is that aha made a second worm really smart. and Then they made the worm into a sexy guy.
and now they’re outside nous’s window, giggling, as everyone in the universe ponders why veritas ratio is not permitted into the genius society.
“what’s wrong, nous? he’s a genius, isn’t he? let him in,” aha goads.
nous is glitching in frustration. “it’s the worm again. i know it’s the worm again.”
Imagine when Diamond is revealed and if he became a playable character, people be switching up real fast. Imagine Diamond releasing and him being a hot tall male character and suddenly everyone simps for the tyrant of the Stonehearts that works for the IPC who values result more than progress. And then suddenly all the Jade haters became a Diamond wanters, even thought Jade is doing Diamond's orders and wishes
Yeah a waifu who's working for the evil IPC company is bad. But her hot mysterious heartthrob superior isn't
i just remembered this British backpacking youtuber wanker who went to chechnya (he straight up said it like "chech-nyar") and he was getting a taxi ride and complimenting the car and saying it meant the guy was rich and this Chechen guy was like "you've come here from England and can pay for taxi rides, you are rich. I'm literally a taxi driver" and the guy got so fucking huffy about it because his whole brand was how low cost tourism he was. really helped cement my dislike for cunts who go to a much poorer country, start acting like they're in and savvy with the locals (while gentrifying their eating spots etc) and getting all white guilty about their position as a tourist with money in a strong currency with strong wages. what a cunt.
or like ppl going to thailand or Vietnam and being like "holy shit can you believe it? if you pay enough you can shoot a cow!" like of fucking course you can. you're the Yankee tourist waving US dollars around for whoever fulfils your stupid requests. no matter how much you want to feel better than rich tourists you're still wealthy compared to the lady giving you a manicure or the guy riding the bike.
really makes you wonder why they're so shocked about sex tourism, like of course you can do depraved shit you're waving money (valuable money too) in front of poor imperialised people. it's almost less empathetic to be shocked by it than to understand why it's such a common thing.
and the attitude that tourists get like "oh everyone's just after my money" and paranoia around getting robbed like of fucking course people want your money you're wearing a luxury watch in front of subsistence fishermen, you're showing off how much money you have even just as a regular citizen of empire to people who'll not only never see a cent of it, but who actively are exploited to make your country rich.
rich cunts i went to school with boasted about having a house in Vanuatu and their mum complained about "how dirty the natives are". actually evil. like knowing how much easier it was for them as rich Australians to buy a house there than the people who literally live there. fucking hell.
