You may call me whatever you’d like, although my most used name is Harvey.
He/Him
Transmasc ~ Abroromantic ~ Abrosexual
I will not argue over my religion, or your religion.
I have very controversial opinions, but I am not afraid to share them.
DNI:
Trumpies/any Trump Supporters, MAGA, Transphobes, Homophobes, Furry/Therian/Alterhumanity Haters, Proshippers, Anyone who thinks neurodivergence can be cured, Hard Drug users.
KEEP IT AWAY FROM ME:
Mentions of bugs, of any kind. This includes ants, flies, etc. I have SEVERE entomophobia.
Hatred of any kind; Homophobia, Racism, Transphobia, I don’t give a shit. You can, respectfully, go fuck yourself.
MY BLOGS:
@g0dwat3r - You’re here, this is my main blog, mostly for reblogging but I occasionally post art.
@g0dwat3rwritings - My writing blog. I take requests for many different fandoms, go check it out if you’re interested!
@g0dwat3rcommissions - This one isn’t much used, but it’s for commissions, for art and fanfics! It also explains the answers for FAQ.
You look down at your tiny paws, horrified.
The bookshelves loom over you menacingly and you remain frozen, with no idea how to get yourself out of this mess. You need to find one of the brothers (preferably Lucifer) to help you out. But how were you going to make them realize it was you? You'll think about that when you find them.
You skitter across the halls of the House of Lamentation, acutely aware of just how many things could kill you now that you were about the size of an orange. Each little noise makes your heart skip and every shadow seems like a threat.
You find one of the brothers in the living room. Unfortunately, it was Asmo.
Amber eyes meet yours and the Avatar of Lust lets out a shriek that belongs in a horror movie.
"Why the hell are you screaming?!" Belphie, who was napping under the coffee table, grumbles in annoyance as he shoves his face into the pillow and pulls the sides up to cover his ears.
Asmo stands up on the couch, screaming like a damsel in distress. "A MOUSE—! WHY IS IT MOVING LIKE THAT—LUCIFER—!!!"
Footsteps thunder down the hall as Beel comes to Asmo's aid.
"Why are you screaming like that?" He looks down at you, and you both have a staring contest for a few seconds. "Oh."
You know that look on Beel all too well. So, you make the wise decision to run before he can turn you into a mouse kebab.
'Nope, not today', you think to yourself as you narrowly escape Beel lunging at you. You zip across the floor, running over a very startled Belphie. You masterfully slip between Satan’s legs (who had just reached the site of chaos). “What is all this noi… what—”
The stair case is so close. If only you could find Lucifer—
You feel yourself bump into something, before being lifted into the air. You come face to face with Mammon. You frantically wave your little paws at him. Maybe he'll understand you. "This is what scared ya?", he says in a bored manner. "I’m tossin’ this thing out—OUCH WHAT THE HELL?!"
Mammon clutches his hand, rubbing the area where you bit him, as you fall out of his grasp and make a mad-dash up the stairs, towards Lucifer's room.
You vault over Levi's feet as he cracks his door open. “Can you all shut up I’m trying to—AHH!!"
And then a thought enters your mind. If none of the brothers, even Mammon, can recognize you, what are the chances that Lucifer will? And if Lucifer caught you, there would be no escape. You pause for a second and change your trajectory, running toward sthe other end of the hall instead. Maybe you should hide out in your room. Try and use your D.D.D to contact Solomon.
Thankfully, you left the door open. You slip into your room and climb up your desk in an attempt to find your D.D.D. And you nearly cry with relief when you do find it lying next to your homework.
You manage to put in your password and unlock it. Now, to open the messaging app—
Mammon bursts in. "Hey, get outta' MC's room!!"
"Wait, it's using their D.D.D??", Levi follows in after.
"Look, it's typing something!!", says Asmo, peeking out from behind Satan.
You have managed to open one of the brother's chat and type out your name. It took quite some effort to reach the keys with your short hands but you finally sit down with relief when you see realization flash in the brothers' eyes.
"Wait...MC??" begins Beel. You squeak at him angrily. "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was you." He looks like a sad puppy now. Mammon looks equally as guilty. You can't help but forgive them.
"Jump twice if you're MC", says Belphie, now wide awake. You jump in spot twice. "Spin." He says with that shit-eating grin. You spin around, glaring up at him. "Hmm, still not convincing enough. Squeak three times."
"Oi, stop messing with them." Mammon lightly smacks the back of Belphie's head.
"Now that I think about it, they’re kind of cute!", Asmo leans in, eyes sparkling . You glare at him like 'Really, bitch? You were the one screaming your lungs out a few seconds ago.' The fifth-born pays no heed as he scoops you up in his palms, cooing at you. "Ooooh, you'd look so cute with a little bow!"
“Put them down,” Satan said sharply, eyes narrowed. You feel anger radiate off of him. Asmo doesn't take chances.
“Who dared to put a curse on you? I’ll make them—” continues Satan.
You hang your head low in shame.
Satan pauses, his anger dissipating and turning into...amusement? Maybe a bit of disappointment? "You did this to yourself, didn't you?"
You squeak pitifully.
Lucifer enters the room, annoyed beyond measure. “What is the meaning of all this chaos? Why is there a rat on MC's desk?"
He takes a look at the scene. The message written on the D.D.D. The oddly calm mouse on the desk.
He looks at his brothers.
Their faces clearly answer: Yes, Lucifer. It is exactly what you think it is.
You squeak again.
Lucifer pinches the bridge of his nose. "...wonderful."
Mammon has never walked so carefully in his life. You are asleep in the front pocket of his jacket, curled up into the softest little ball. Mammon is trying very hard not to jostle you. Asmo peaks into Mammon’s pocket every once in a while to coo at you, only to be swatted away by the second-born. “They’re sleepin’, be quiet!”
The seven reach purgatory hall. Lucifer presses the door bell. You wake up from your slumber and poke your head out of the pocket and are met with the sight of Solomon looking directly at you while Lucifer explains what's going on.
Solomon takes you in his hand as you climb out of Mammon's pocket.
“Oh my, look at you!” Solomon brings you up to his face, eyes lighting up. “Do you have any idea how hard it is not to squeal?”
"Please don't", says Belphie.
"Just fix 'em up quickly. No shady business", warns Mammon.
Lucifer looks at you, comfortable in Solomon's palm. "I trust that you will help turn them back without further... complications."
"When have I ever caused any trouble, huh?", Solomon smiles at the group. They give him very unimpressed looks before Solomon pushes them all out of Purgatory Hall, their complaints falling of deaf ears. Mammon lingered the longest, only relenting when you looked up at him reassuringly.
The door shuts. Solomon looks down at you, eyes sparkling with amusement. He slowly lifts his palms up, lifting you up along with them. "Behold my mighty apprentice, feared across realms."
You stare at him.
Oh, you were adorable. Maybe he'll keep you like this for a short while, just to have fun.
You accept your fate.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
You have escaped Solomon's study, like a professional mouse, because you have ✨priorities✨. You were definitely not going to lose this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
You navigate around Purgatory hall with your tiny little feet skittering on the ground till you find what you were looking for. Or rather, who you were looking for.
Simeon feels something soft bump into his leg. He looks down and sees a little mouse looking up at him with...familiarity?
"Oh. Hello there, little one."
You squeal internally.
You climb onto the couch and press your head against his arm.
Simeon laughs quietly, putting down his book. “Well, aren’t you affectionate?"
Simeon gently rubs your head with a finger. You stand up on two legs and place your paws on his hand. "You must like attention." He gently scoops you up and strokes your fur. You immediately melt into his palm. Oh. Yes. This was the good stuff.
And that's how Solomon finds you fifteen minutes later. Absolutely basking in the angel's affections.
"Oh, I see. So this is what betrayal feels like."
You jump up at Solomon's voice, making Simeon gently pat you in an attempt to calm you down.
"Hello, Solomon. I found this little mouse wandering around. They’re very polite. A little angel, really."
"Is that so?", replies Solomon as he pries you away from Simeon. You try to wriggle out of his hands and back to Simeon's, but to no avail.
"Does it happen to be yours?", asks Simeon.
"Well, it does happen to be my apprentice."
"Apprentice...?"
Simeon takes a closer look at you. You try to hide your face.
"MC?"
Simeon blinks once; then laughs, warm and surprised. “Oh my. That explains the affectionate behaviour."
"Imagine my heartbreak. One moment they’re safely with me, and the next I discover they’ve abandoned their dear teacher to go snuggle with an angel. Do humans not suit you anymore, my dear apprentice?"
As much as you love and appreciated Solomon, you do feel like punching him right now. But you can't really do that in this form, can you? So, you resort to glaring instead.
"How did this happen? Them turning into a mouse, I mean.” asks Simeon.
"Hmm, that's what I'd love to know too." Solomon looks down at your angry little face as he says that. "Hey, stop looking at me like that. Not my fault you got caught being a simp."
"What does that mean? 'Simp'?"
You glare harder, daring Solomon to say anything else embarrassing.
"Someone who is very...affectionate, let's say." Solomon replies.
"Ah, I see. MC does, indeed, appear to be a 'simp', then."
Solomon does a very good job holding back his laugh as you let out a mortified sound.
"Anyways, we will take our leave. I still need to find a cure to this." He says finally.
"Yes, that's important. Take care, both of you." Simeon resumes to reading his book as Solomon carries you out of Purgatory Hall and into the Devildom street.
You squeak at Solomon with confusion. What is he up to now?
"You know, I'm kind of hurt", says Solomon, with exaggerated dramatics. "Leaving me all alone to go snuggle up to Simeon. Especially after I spend hours working hard and trying to find a cure for you. Truly heartless."
You give him your best puppy—er—mouse eyes (?).
"Ah, how can I stay mad at that face? But, I can't really let go of what happened. You still need to make it up to me, you know?"
Solomon puts you on his shoulder, earning a few curious looks from demons going about their day.
"Oh, don't worry, my dearest apprentice. I'll only have a bit of harmless fun."
Barbatos' eye twitches as he looks at Solomon, and you, comfortably perched on his shoulder. "Why", he begins, voice laced with absolute disgust, "have you brought that thing here?"
If looks could kill, you'd be a dead mouse by now.
"Please remove it immediately."
“Oh, come now. They’re harmless. Would you like to hold them?” Says Solomons, as be brings you closer to the butler.
You feel the urge to hide in Solomon's sleeves.
Barbatos goes rigid. “I despise r— 'you-know-what's,” he says evenly.
"Now, now, that is no way to talk about my dear apprentice. Also, they’re a mouse, not a rat."
"...Apprentice?" Barbatos finally takes a closer look at you. "I see."
He takes a step back, eyes glowing with ancient power. “Then there is no need for this nonsense.”
Time seems to warp around you, and a second later, you find yourself sitting on the floor back in your human form. You were unharmed, albeit a bit dizzy. Barbatos helps you up.
"I was having so much fun. And you just had to go and do that..." Solomon says in a disappointed manner. "Still, I guess it is quite a rare opportunity to see the Barbatos perform his time magic."
Barbatos chooses to ignore Solomon, instead checking on you to ensure you were feeling alright.
As fun as it was seeing the rather stoic butler try so hard to maintain his composure, you do feel kind of guilty. “Barbatos, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” you say sheepishly.
“It is forgiven,” he says immediately. "I was just preparing tea for the Young Master. Would you like to join him? I'm sure he would be delighted"
"How come I never get invi—" begins Solomon.
“Solomon, you may take your leave now.”
Solomon sighs dramatically. “You ruin all my fun.”
A/N: Locked in so hard that I didn't even realize how long this became. Just sat here for three hours straight. This might be the most random fic I've written yet. But hey, I thinks it's pretty cute and i got to write all my favourite characters in one fic so yay.
[As per the results of the poll, i decided to keep this as one single post]
Solomon watching Barbietoes and Mouse!MC interact be like:
thinking about mammon and how he’s not always the avatar of greed. mammon who works extra shifts because levi wanted a new game. mammon who goes out of his way to buy asmo a new makeup kit. mammon who forced lucifer to go to bed because the first born was too tired to continue the thousands of paper work from diavolo. mammon who brought satan a new book series. mammon who indulges belphie by buying him a new body pillow. mammon who goes to all of beel’s games.
mammon who does all this silently because he knows damn well tomorrow his brothers are gonna call him scum and worthless. but still, he does it to see them happy.
because hey, it’s okay if everyone’s happy besides mammon, right?
Can I make a request about the house wardens like how would their friends react when they walk in on their house warden making out with their lover and they had no clue they were dating like make it spicy but also funny as hell and if you want to do this like in parts like I mean not just the house wardens I won’t mind either honestly I have no favorites go crazy 🤪
P.s I loved your heat of the moment fanfic soooo much !!!
❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
" 𝒞AUGHT RED-HANDED " ― HOUSEWARDENS PT. 1
・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・
✧˖° Content Warning ── mild suggestive, making out, sfw, caught making out, established relationship, embarrassing moments, teasing, they are WEAK honestly they folded too easily, implied female reader, grammatical mistakes!
✧˖° Author's Note ── this seems like something i can do with other characters, but for now i'll do the housewardens !! hope you enjoy <3 please read end notes !
⋆.˚ ℛiddle
it was supposed to be a simple study session. it never is. you needed to focus more on your studies, yet life had other plans. the tension in the room was hot, it was sickening. when your fingers touch his when you moved too close, it how your thighs graze his when you adjust in your seat.
It was your fault for wanting to study beside him on his bed, where the sheets are messy and scrunched.
he felt a blush in his cheeks when you full-on grabbed his thigh to steady yourself, he cracked. he dropped his textbook from his lap, pages scattered to the floor, as he grabbed your collar and smashed his lips to yours.
how unprofessional. as the housewarden of the queen of hearts house, he certainly isn't following any rules at this moment.
you were in his mind, and his lips were on yours.
things led to another, until he had you pinned to his mattress. red sheets messy under you as he pulled back just enough to stare into your eyes.
he apologized, but didn't move away. instead, he leaned closer to kiss your nose.
he pants, a hand reaching to brush your bangs away from your eyes―your hands at your head as he cups your chin gently, leaning back down asking if this was acceptable.
of course it was, he was your boyfriend. you loved his. you were more than comfortable whenever he got intimate like this, not like anyone else will know.
his lips danced over yours with warmth and passion, a little bit rusty due to not being the best at intimate moments such as this, but he's willing to try, for you.
just as your hands found their way under his vest, his thumb brushing over your cheek mid-kiss―the door suddenly bursts open.
trey and cater stand at the door, frozen.
they take in the scene, cater forming the image in his head far too into detail. their own housewarden, straddling one of their classmates with his fingers tangled in their hair and hands under his vests, clothes messy and almost stripped off.
it was, blantly, obvious they walked in on you two making out―trey and cater are both relieved that is all they walked in on.
the room fell into a complete, awkward silence. faces flushed, riddles eyes wide and his face redder than his own hair. collar crooked and body limp.
he twitched upon hearing caters laugh, " ohoho, this is GOLD― didn't take you for the top, riddle. i guess i owe ace twenty-aauh, i mean ... "
trey immediately spoke over the other beside him, making sure he could not snatch a picture of the scene in front of them.
" ah, we seem to have forgotten to knock, "
riddle's chest was heaving when he pulled back from you. far, far back. face hot, trying to fix his clothes as subtle as possible.
" sorry for intruding, ah please― continue. we just wanted to remind you about five pm crochet, housewarden. "
" but we totally understand if you're too busy to―"
" both of you. out .. " riddle speaks under his breath, but when the two didn't move fast enough, his voice rose. " NOW !! " a finger pointing to the door, the third years' scrambled out and shuts the door quickly.
there's a beat of silence that echoes through the room longer than expected, riddle adjusts his clothes and cleans the mess. trying to keep his cool.
" so, " you spoke up softly, cuddling the blankets to your chest you shift awkwardly on his bed. " didn't they technically break rule #24 ? shouldn't that cover this whole .. situation ? "
you let out a nervous chuckle, the mood unfortunately ruined.
riddle blushes, hard, his heart beating out of his chest. " it does now. " he pauses, " i'll worry about it ... tomorrow, however. "
he's just thanking the sevens it wasn't ace and deuce to walk in.
⋆.˚ ℒeona
he claims it wasn't his fault, it was yours, for being so close to him. leona gets handsy very quickly, mostly when he's bored and what's more boring then studying for a class he could probably pass with his eyes close if his actually wanted to put in the effort.
your skin was soft, too soft, he wanted to sink his teeth into your body so bad at this point―he was not slick. your thighs graze his tail when talking about a certain topic and he snapped.
" yah, were done. "
" and since― wait, what? "
leona slams the textbook on your lap shut and tosses it to the floor of his bed, already taking it's place by crawling into your legs and pushing your hair behind your neck.
" leona, wait, are you serious― "
" do i look serious ? "
and he proves it by leaning close to your neck and kissing you. it was soft at first, barely there, testing the waters. waiting for you to push him away, but you didn't.
and that, forced a smirk, you felt it on your skin. he suddenly sucks your neck mid-kiss, his hands already getting busy.
" l-leona, wait― we didnt lock the door― ! " you were cut off by his lips smashing into yours for a quick moment to shut you up, pulling far back enough to mummer, " as if anyone would be stupid enough to walk through that door during these hours. "
well, there is one certain hyena.
he kisses you again, following you down to the bed until your back was at the mattress and he was proudly pinning you down. his lips dance across yours, coordinated and impatient. his hands found the hem of your shirt and just as he shoved his hands under the fabric, the door clicks open.
" leona-san ! i got your laundry― "
the room fell into a dead, cold silence.
ruggie stares.
you stare back with the same, eye widened and blushy face. thank god leona's body covered most of you, you felt less exposed as leona groaned into your neck.
his hands are now at your thighs, squeezing' them as a way to de-stress the situation before he started throwing stuff. as leona stayed where he was, ruggie was already moving.
" im just ... gonna pretend i see absolutely nothing and use this as an excuse for you to pay me fire. " he shrugs, dropping the basket of Leona's clean clothes in the corner and turned on his heel to leave the room.
but ... he takes a moment before fully leaving. " because if ya don't, " know he was just acting smug. leona groans, finally leaning back, eyes flickering at the hyenas direction.
" you're still here ?? "
ruggie leans against the door frame and grins, but the tint of pink on his ears and cheeks weren't subtle. " you're the reason he's skipping classes and spelldrive practices, huh ? " his eyes linger at you, and you hide in leona's pillow.
" what are you getting at, ruggie ? " the housewarden rubs the bridge of his nose, waiting for the boy to leave. " i've had to cover for your ass all this time, you OWE me ! "
" fine, put it on my tab. " leona sighed, already adjusting himself back into in hopes that would scare the hyena and thankfully, it did.
but not without,
" old ass man, "
leona flicks his tail in anger, " OKAY, I'M LEAVING ! " and off he was, ruggie rushed out of the room and shuts the door with his tail between his legs.
you stare back at leona once the best of silence passes, arms wrapped around his neck while his hands rest at your hips.
" hey, at least ya don't gotta worry about telling everyone now ! " you teases, knowing this will probably be brought up again the next day.
leona grunts, pulling you close as his lips brush against yours. " sounds like a tomorrows' us problem, now shut your trap and kiss me. "
⋆.˚ 𝒜zul
he's weak. he can't stop staring at you no matter how hard he tries to keep focus on his papers, many contracts to sigh and put away, client appointments needed to be reviewed and verified.
but you were making it so difficult ! you needed a quiet place to study without the distractions of other students or your friends, so you went to your boyfriend―who was glad to help in any way he could.
he wasn't prepared for how beautiful you were when entering his office―hair tied in a neat bun, collar straight and your makeup flawless. you put in so much effort for yourself, he was swooned.
hook, line and sinker.
you were sitting at the couch in the middle of the room, legs crossed and face relaxed as you scribble down notes and answers from the textbook on the table to your notepad on your lap.
and azul ?
staring. it wasn't subtle, his eyes narrowed behind his glasses and his fingers fiddled with his pen. you felt a pair of eyes on you, so you turned your head to find azu staring at you.
he panicked and looked away for a moment. " azul ? " you called out, his shoulders shook. " is something wrong ? "
yes. yes, there was. but he can't explain what this feeling was in words.―he can in action, however.
" forgive me, " he spoke suddenly, rising to his feet he quickly strides toward you and sat beside you. glasses almost falling off his face when he suddenly kisses you, your eyes widen at the action but ... you didn't pull away.
his kisses turned messy, gloved hands finding their way to your school uniform and fiddle with the buttons, your thigh riding up his hip as he leans closer.
you find yourself pinned at the cushions of the couch, azul hovering over you with his hat forgotten on the floor, hair messy and cheeks red.
how unprofessional.
but he couldn't bother with business, work or contracts at the moment―right now, you were all that mattered. just as he leans back down to kiss you, mummering an apology for his actions, the door suddenly creaks open.
" azul, are you in― "
time froze. a pair of twins stared from the frame of the door the two of you straddled together on the couch. floyd peaks over jades shoulder, for a moment his face was curious and innocent―but soon it slipped into a sharp grin.
jade just kept a poised, subtle look―lips in a small pout and eyes wide open.
what's worse is that you were the only one to notice their presence, azul suddenly feeling your body tense and your hands stiff at his shoulders, the man lifts his head and spots the twins are the door.
his bangs barely made them visible, but when floyd wiggled his fingers at him in a teasy wave, azul felt his body jolt like he was electrocuted.
he turns off of you so past, the papers on the table almost to flying. he adjusts his hat, glasses and clears his throat when the two twins just watch.
both of them, now fully amused.
" my, my ~ and too think you would have locked the door, " jade starts, knocking on the door, a sly grin on his lips. floyd wasn't any better, he simply leaves against his twins' shoulder and lets his teeth shine on display.
" it's NOT what it looks like― "
" it's looks like the two of ya' were playing tongue twister a few seconds ago~ "
azul blushed mad, " DO NOT CALL IT THAT― "
" so he can't deny it~ "
azul groaned into his scarf, a gloved hand up to his head as he asked what the two of them wanted. jade simply shakes his head, " we can come back later, boss~ we wouldn't want to keep you two from, your private meeting~ "
" yeah, it looks like you're busy~ "
you choke back a laugh, azul looks like he's going to explode.
when they both leave, the room falls into silence. you look over at azul, who is hiding behind his hat and sits at the other oxich across from you.
" you don't have any contract to forget about this scenario, huh ? "
he fixes his bow with a shaky hand, " if they value their life, they will keep their traps, shut. "
⋆.˚ 𝓚alim
kalim is not subtle. at all. he loves you and your body, so when you show up to his party all glamour up and looking all pretty, he can't stake his eyes off you.
it's a miracle he's keeping your relationship a secret all this time. even if someone would question it, he would've simply said you were a really nice person to be around and possibly blow it in case they were calling you out for being ugly or he can do better than you.
not the point.
the point is, he can't take his eyes off your legs. the way you sway across the floor, your dress twirls with you as you step and spins, ugh he's dying to kiss you right now.
you look so pretty on the dance floor, he actually might explode.
this is when he takes the spot of your friend yo what u invited, a soft blush on your face when you realize how close he is to you and he quickly drags you away front he crowd.
he finds a small closet and is quick to hide you both in there, he's so excited he forgot to lock it. he shuts it and immediately smashes his lips on yours to kiss you, hands going to to your waist while your arms wrap around his neck.
through the kisses, he pulls back just to remind you how beautiful you are and he goes back again. the kisses are messy and hot, the strap of your dress threatening to fall at any second.
kalim's hands find the bottom of your dress and while he pins you to the wall, the door suddenly creaks open. despite the very little stream of light that pooled in the floor of the closet, it was obvious to see jamil standing at the frame.
he just wanted to know where kalim went, annoyed he ventured off without telling him until he realized he could have been kidnapped so ... this is where his worries led him.
" ahah, jamil ! " kalim awkwardly laughs, pulling back and fixing your dress and wiping the lipstick from his lips. " i guess― i forgot to lock the― "
" no need to explain yourself, i'll just leave. " and so he did. very quickly, the door shuts as fast as it opened. during this, kalim fiddled with your fingers as the closest turned dark once again, you found the light switch close to your shoulder and the orange light illuminates the small enclosure.
" you're gonna have to face him again, " you chuckle when he sighs against your shoulder, skin hot against his. " yah, but he'll be happy for me ! "
ah kalim, you made your girlfriend's night<3
end notes ― decided to make a part two of this after my requests are done <3 WHY IS NOTHING IM TRYING TO EDIT SAVING ACTUALLY STOP.
You were just a random human that had the audacity to call the Great Malleus Draconia by a silly little nickname, instead of the Great Malleus Draconia, like everyone should address him. But the worst part was that his Liege was not bothered at all by this. No, you became a close confidant to Malleus without even trying. Which may or may not make Sebek feel jealous because he wanted to be there looking at gargoyles in the middle of the night with Malleus and be the one he confided in.
But it wasn’t him. It was you. It was always you.
Sebek didn't want anything to do with you, but you soon began to show up everywhere he was. Silver invited you to the Equestrian Club. Lilia thought it was a great idea to bring you to Diasomnia. At lunch, you were now sitting across from him. And everything about you annoyed Sebek. So much so that he found himself thinking about you when he was lying in his bed at night instead of Malleus's greatness.
Everyone loved you, but Sebek could only see someone unremarkable with the tendency to cause trouble. He was surprised when he found himself laughing at something you said. Genuinely laughing. He did not expect you to be funny at all. Seems that even humans could make good jokes.
Eventually, Sebek had grown used to your presence. Which did not mean he liked having you around! But then you did something that completely caught him by surprise again. You gifted him a present for his birthday. Not only was he surprised that you actually remembered and got him something, but that your present was a most thoughtful one, he liked very much.
After that, something within him changed. He felt strange when you were near. There was a warmth that both confused and unsettled him. Sebek wasn’t used to feeling vulnerable, and yet your presence stirred a softness he hadn’t anticipated. Whenever you spoke, his guard momentarily dropped, revealing a part of himself he rarely showed to anyone.
Now, instead of being annoyed with Silver for inviting you to the Equestrian Club, he felt himself looking forward to seeing your face when he rounded the corner to the stables. And felt his heart drop when you weren't there. During lunch, he made sure to save you one of the egg sandwiches you liked so much and that were always gone, even if it meant scaring a few other students away.
He even looked after Grim for you. It wasn’t even that Sebek was simply tolerating the task. No, he put his everything into keeping your cat companion safe and behaved. Because no matter how irritating Grim was, it was still clear to everyone that there was a strong bond between the two of you. So it was a great honor that you entrusted him with something so close to your heart.
Sebek didn’t fully understand what was happening to him. The cold certainty with which he had dismissed you before was now replaced by a quiet, persistent pull he couldn’t deny. An urge to be near you, to protect you, to make you smile. Yet, embarrassment clenched his chest every time those feelings surfaced. It was confounding and, frankly, infuriating.
So, in conflict with his emotions, he one day asked Silver what all of this meant and what he was supposed to do now. But Silver just told him that if it felt good to be with you, then he should just spend more time with you. Sebek was sure that Silver was also half asleep during that time.
But by the time Sebek decided what to do, it was too late.
Sebek could still remember that one night vividly. And how his heart shattered into a million pieces.
The night began not too differently from many others. While it was his and Silver's knightly duty to stay close to Malleus and protect him, the fae prince often sneaked off alone.
Sebek followed the hint he got from someone, who claimed they thought they saw Malleus near one of the old ruins on campus. Sebek was very offended that the person could not answer his question with certainty. After all, everyone should be able to detect Malleus regal presence from miles away.
But what Sebek saw, after entering the ruin, made him forget everything about his outrage towards the student.
Sebek’s breath caught in his throat, his chest tightening as he stepped quietly into the shadowed corridor of the ruin. The soft glow of Malleus’s presence was unmistakable, yet what truly stole Sebek’s focus was the sight of you, standing close to the prince. A closeness so intimate and natural that it sent a pang of something unfamiliar twisting through him.
Malleus’s hand was resting gently on your shoulder, his eyes fixed on you with a softness that Sebek had never seen before. The usual grandeur and unyielding authority melted away in this private moment, replaced by a quiet tenderness that made Sebek’s heart ache in a way he couldn’t understand. You smiled up at Malleus, and the prince’s smile in return was like a secret gift, meant only for you.
For a long while, Sebek had wished to be as close to Malleus as you were. But now he realized in that moment he wanted to be in Malleus's place. To be the person you looked up to like this, like he was your entire world. To be the person who gets to see your vulnerability and protect it from ever being hurt again.
But it wasn’t him. It was Malleus. It was always Malleus.
Sebek lingered in the shadows, every breath weighted like lead in his chest. He should have turned away the moment he realized what he was witnessing. It felt wrong to stay, to intrude on something sacred and fleeting. But his feet were rooted to the moss-covered floor. He couldn’t look away.
Sebek’s breath caught again, just as you gently reached up and touched Malleus’s cheek. The fae prince leaned into your hand with a softness so uncharacteristic of the regal, composed figure Sebek knew. There was a glow in Malleus’s eyes. Not from his magic, but from something warmer, eternally gentler.
Then, Malleus lowered his head just slightly, lips brushing yours in a kiss that was achingly slow and reverent, as though he feared you might vanish if he wasn’t careful. His hand slid from your shoulder to the curve of your jaw, holding you close like you were treasure. His fingers trembled, barely perceptible, but Sebek saw it. Felt it like a blow.
When Malleus pulled away, he lingered near your face, forehead resting against yours as he whispered something so low, Sebek almost didn’t hear it.
"You have a light that brightens even the darkest places. To be near you is to feel the threads of fate weaving a beautiful tale. One I hope will never end," he murmured. "With you, I am whole. Where you go, I follow. Always."
"You don’t have to follow. Because I plan to stay by your side. Always," you answered, with that beautiful smile and blushing cheeks, that would have made even the most cynical person melt.
Sebek’s insides twisted painfully. That smile. He’d seen it before. It brought warmth to even the coldest Diasomnia mornings. He'd caught himself thinking, foolishly, naively, that perhaps, someday, you would smile like that… for him.
His fists clenched uselessly against his sides, trembling with the effort of holding himself together.
The ruins felt suddenly suffocating, as if centuries of stone and moss had closed in on him. Sebek’s pride, his knightly devotion, all the certainty that had sustained him, splintered beneath the weight of a feeling he could barely name: heartbreak.
Sebek finally found it in himself to tear his gaze away. He turned to leave but then accidentally kicked a stone away, causing a noise that alerted both Malleus and you to his presence.
Sebek’s heart stopped for a moment as both of you turned toward the sounds of the disturbance. The tender, intimate moment shattered like fragile glass. He felt like all of this wasn’t real until Malleus's voice cut through the darkness, reminding Sebek that everything was in fact real.
"Sebek," Malleus said. His voice was firm but not unkind. "What are you doing here?"
Sebek bowed his head slightly, swallowing hard. "My apologies, my Liege. I... I thought you might be in danger. Someone said they saw you here."
Before Sebek could make things worse, Silver came rushing into ruin. "Sebek, wait. Malleus is-" Silver stopped mid-sentence when he saw that he was too late. "I told you we aren’t needed tonight."
Silver might have said something like that when Sebek stormed off. Did that mean Silver knew? Did everyone know? Was it only lost on him how close his Liege and you were?
Sebek felt a wave of shame crashing down on him, paired with the hurt and jealousy he felt; his heart might actually rip in two. He could only hear faintly when Silver apologized on his behalf for the disturbance, to which Malleus simply said that it was fine. Sebek's eyes fell onto you. You were standing there still close to Malleus, but no longer touching him. Your eyes were wide and filled with embarrassment.
Silver approached him. "Sebek, let’s-"
Sebek didn’t wait for Silver to finish his sentence. He just ran off into the woods. The forest was thick with shadows, and Sebek stumbled through it, not caring where he was going. The sting in his eyes blurred his vision, and he hardly noticed the way the brambles tugged at his uniform or the wetness that seeped into his sleeves as he pushed past ferns and branches.
He couldn’t even wish for a chance to have realized his feelings sooner and confess to you before Malleus, because that would mean he would steal away his Liege's chance of happiness. Malleus was his Liege, his prince, and Sebek’s duty was to protect him, not to compete with him for affections he could not fight for.
And, of course, given the chance, who wouldn’t choose Malleus Draconia as their partner? Sebek knew how great Malleus was.
Yet now, here he was, faced with a painful truth: the very person he had come to care for had already given their heart to Malleus. A heart that Sebek never could steal.
Even if Sebek dared to hope, dared to imagine himself standing alongside you, he knew in his bones that it would be a betrayal of Malleus. The very person he had sworn unwavering loyalty to and to protect.
What right did he have, really? To take from Malleus even a sliver of happiness, when it was clear the prince’s light shone brightest with you? Sebek clenched his fists, the weight of loyalty and love pressing in on him from all sides. How could he let himself want something that Malleus had already claimed?
Animation version of this post by @rockxgal as I promised here my delivery! My hands are sore but I had so much fun making this animation I hope yall like it!!!
💬 15 🔁 47 ❤️ 515 · Candle-lit · If you're looking for requests, how about a nice candle-lit dinner date with your favourite cookie?
and j
Also if you guys have more short comics you want animated let me know eheheh, I will see what I can do.
you’ve got me thinking about so many scenarios now with the saja boys. like what if reader and bird, and the cat/tiger started bonding, and won’t let the any of the boys near her now. which ofc drives the boys crazy which reader takes full advantage of
SAJA BOYS x HUNTR/X’S ASSISTANT!READER this exact scenario editon
AN: Started with your idea, then flipped the plot a little ;) This is connected to the original assistant!reader series but not canon to it. I KNOW the animals have names but I feel sm better just calling them tiger and bird, so no names will be in this one, except a few times. Just tiger and bird :P also plz tell me if I wrote crow somewhere.
cw: cursing, could be uncomfortable situations for some readers, Stockholm Syndrome developing, sexual themes, me actually writing down “demon dick”
It started, like most of your misfortunes around here, with Baby being a dick.
You don’t know how it happened exactly, maybe he got bored, maybe he just liked the way your skin jumped when feathers brushed your neck unexpectedly, maybe it was just a mood. Either way, Baby got hold of the bird.
He trained it, or more like influenced it, with whatever slick little sugar-poison voice he uses to get what he wants, to divebomb you. Steal your hair ties. Drop little pebbles into your water. One time it literally dragged your sock away mid-nap.
You’d be sitting at the kitchen table, minding your own hostage business, and the next thing you know there’s a feathery blur by your ear and your fucking banana is gone.
Jinu always sighed and said, “Sussie. No.” But it was half-hearted. You could tell even he was impressed sometimes.
And of course, Baby thought it was hilarious. He’d smile with all his teeth, lips barely curled up, watching you wrestle with a bird wearing a tiny hat. He’d hum to himself as the bird ran off with your notes, or your pen, or your peace of mind.
But here’s the thing, you bond with animals.
Always have.
So while the bird spent a good two weeks trying to make your life a nightmare, it started changing. Subtly, at first. It would land near you after a successful theft and just stare. Not looking for praise. Just…waiting. Studying. It noticed when you didn’t scream. When you didn’t chase it down. When you just reached for your backup pen without a care. It didn’t know what to do with that.
Then one day, you fed it a dried mango piece. No big show, no coaxing, no baby voice. Just held it out and waited.
It took it from your fingers, slow. Eyeing you with something like suspicion. It came back the next day. Sat on the coffee table and blinked at you while you peeled an orange. And when Baby told it to go knock your cup over?
It didn’t move.
That silence was delicious. Baby narrowed his eyes. “Sussie.” he said again, warning in his tone.
The bird ruffled its feathers and hopped closer to you instead.
After that, the bird kept hanging around. Close enough that its tiny hat started looking endearing rather than stupid. It picked your shoulder more than Baby’s now. Started bringing you things, too, shiny buttons, a single earring, once even a heart-shaped stone it must’ve dug out of some rooftop garden or one of Romance’s necklaces.
Then there’s the tiger.
You didn’t even try. You didn’t coo at it or offer treats or chase it around the apartment like Romance once did with a laser pointer (a bad idea, he got clawed so hard he couldn’t wear crop tops for a week). You just…acknowledged it.
You’d smile when it entered a room. Move out of the way without comment. Sat near it, not with it, when it chose to lounge near the couch.
And eventually, the tiger started choosing you.
The first time it climbed into your lap, you were shelling sunflower seeds on the balcony, blanket over your legs. It circled twice, and settled with its massive weight pinning your legs numb. It purred, deep and resonant. You didn’t dare move.
You did, however, slowly, carefully, place a seed in front of the bird sitting on the railing.
Balance.
Now, the tiger follows you from room to room. The bird perches on your shoulder, judging everyone and occasionally trying to steal your fruit again.
Baby pretends it doesn’t bother him. But it does. You can tell. Every time the bird ignores his call, or the tiger hisses when he enters the room, his eye twitches just slightly.
Sometimes you whisper, “Traitor.” to the bird, just to tease. It blinks slowly, like Yeah, and what about it?
Jinu watches the whole thing with that serene little smile. Not surprised. Not proud. Just…gentle. Like he always knew you’d bond with them. Like that’s the real reason they’re yours now.
And it’s weird, maybe. Being held here. Being watched, interrogated, occasionally flirted with or ignored or attacked. But you have allies now.
And honestly, at this point? You think they’d kill for you.
Though the tiger, as majestic and celestial and myth-born as it looks, is dumb as bricks.
There’s no other way to say it.
You’re pretty sure if it were capable of stringing thoughts together, they’d sound like, “food now? sleep here? this lap mine? bird annoying. must sit on bird.” It’s all muscle and divine elegance until it walks headfirst into a sliding door. Which it has. Twice. Tail held high the whole time like it meant to do that.
It’ll stare at shadows for hours. Watch lint fall. Try to climb inside laundry baskets and then forget how to get out. One time, it saw its own reflection in the mirror and spent ten whole minutes just pawing at it, purring.
An idiot, really. A glorious, loveable idiot.
But the bird? The bird is smarter than most of the boys.
That bird knows things. It gets things.
And at some point, maybe when you sat on the bathroom floor silently crying while the bird just perched nearby, not leaving, it started to realize the shape of your reality.
The boys, in their beautiful idiocy, had forgotten the most basic rule of kidnapping someone: acknowledge that you fucking kidnapped someone.
They didn’t talk about it. Not once. No mention of how you got there. No apologies. No explanations.
And for the longest time, the bird didn’t know any better.
But the bird is sharp. It noticed things they didn’t.
It noticed the way your shoulders tensed whenever someone blocked the door. The way you never turned your back fully in the kitchen. The way you clutched your toothbrush like a shiv, or kept the steak knife under your pillow. The way you flinched when someone laughed too loud.
The tiger didn’t understand allat. Not really. It just knew when you were sad. It would curl up next to you and make little bleating, wheezing purrs and press its giant head against your leg. It once dropped a sock in your lap and looked so proud you almost cried.
But the bird?
The bird wanted revenge.
It started small. Nothing major. Just tiny fuck-you’s.
Like flying away with Baby’s eyeliner. Perching directly above Romance and shitting precisely as he was taking selfies. Switching Jinu’s calming tea with saltwater. Taking Abby’s gym socks and hiding them in the rice cooker. The only one it didn’t harass daily was Mystery, but only because he didn’t really do anything to you.
They thought it was funny at first.
But it didn’t stop. It escalated.
The moment Baby realized it could unlock his phone? Brutal.
But Jinu wouldn’t let them punish it. Of course not. It was his. Which made them even more mad because they couldn’t yell at him either. Jinu’s soft “hmm?” and gentle hand petting the tiger meant absolutely nothing was getting done.
Meanwhile, the bird would sit on your shoulder, tilting its head just enough to let you know: yeah, I’m doing this for you.
You started letting it perch inside your room. Let it steal Abby’s protein bars and deliver them. You even once cracked open your window and whispered, “Go terrorize Baby for me.”
It came back two hours later with eyeliner all over its wings and one of Baby’s earrings.
And the tiger? Well. The cat didn’t do schemes.
It just loved.
You think that’s what made it dumber than the bird, but somehow sweeter. The tiger didn’t care what kind of tension filled the apartment, or which boy was growling at which. It just found the softest part of any room, flopped belly-up, and let Abby pet it.
It was particularly fond of Jinu’s lap, of course, but once it started sleeping in your bed? Game over.
It was your bed now.
And gods help anyone who tried to move it.
Romance tried once. Just once. Came into your room and tried to slide in beside you.
The tiger hissed so loud it blew out two overhead bulbs.
Romance ran.
After that, you didn’t need to lock your door. The tiger handled everything.
But Abby could flop down next to the tiger, call it “Big Fucker,” and rub its belly with both hands like it was a dog, and the tiger would just melt. Flat on its back, eyes closed, purring.
You didn’t mind at first. Thought it was sweet, even, seeing how gentle Abby got when he was with the tiger. Like it unlocked something in him that wasn’t pure evil. You liked that side of him, quietly.
But things started shifting.
Because even though Abby could pet the tiger’s belly…
The tiger didn’t just tolerate you. It gravitated toward you.
Started sleeping in your bed. Licking your hand. Butting its massive head under your palm until you pet it exactly the way it liked. Following you into the bathroom like you were the only creature in the entire apartment worth monitoring while peeing.
Abby noticed. Of course he did.
“Bro.” he said one day, staring in betrayal as the tiger stood up mid-pet and walked out of his arms to go sit by your feet. “I just gave him a whole-ass fish.”
You shrugged.
It felt good. Just a little. To be chosen.
Jinu, though. Jinu was different.
The tiger had chosen him first. You could see it in the way it curled around his legs when he was thinking, or in the way it listened when he whispered in its ear. He was soft with it. Never used it like a weapon. Never demanded anything. Just offered presence and peace.
And now, with you?
It was the same kind of love.
If Jinu was the beginning of the tiger’s life, you were the second parent in the divorce.
You’d catch Jinu’s eye sometimes. He’d just smile, fond and a little tired.
“He’s spoiled.” he’d murmur, watching the tiger roll onto its back, massive paws in the air, demanding more affection.
You’d nod. “He gets it from your side of the family.”
And Jinu would laugh, quiet and warm, like the two of you were in on something bigger than everyone else.
The bird made no such compromises.
It was yours.
Flat-out, fully, unapologetically. Even when it still technically listened to Jinu—came when he called, perched on his arm when he whistled—it still returned to you.
It started sleeping near your pillow.
Started warning you when someone was coming down the hallway.
Started pulling your sleeve when Baby entered the room.
No more pranks. No more tests. It trusted you now. And anyone who didn’t? Anyone who crossed that line?
The bird would handle them.
It became very clear, very fast, that the animal had picked a side. And it was not the boys’.
It began policing them.
Not overtly. The bird was too clever for that. But it started showing up between you and the others. Not all of them, not all the time, mostly just Romance, Mystery, and Baby. (Especially Baby. That vendetta never quite died.)
They all noticed.
Baby started giving it the look, that sharp, slit-eyed, oh-you-want-to-fucking-go look.
Romance pretended to be heartbroken. Put his hand to his chest, all “Birdy, how could you?” while inching away under its stare.
Mystery just glared at it. The bird glared back. Feathers ruffled, wings spread.
The tiger joined in, eventually.
Not in the same active, devious way.
The tiger started inserting itself, sprawling across doorways whenever someone tried to corner you, laying on your lap when someone tried to sit next to you, curling up on your feet when the boys raised their voices.
It was unmovable.
At one point, Abby came too close during a joke—just a joke, really—and the tiger slowly turned its head and growled.
That shook him. Just enough to step back, hands raised. “Damn, okay, I got it.”
You were being guarded.
Kept.
You’re locked in a penthouse with five demon boys, kidnapped from your job like it was some cute prank, denied freedom, interrogated, and occasionally tortured. You’ve been through shit. You’ve cried silently on tiled floors. You’ve been treated like background noise and still no one’s even acknowledged that you didn’t ask to be here.
So no. You don’t feel bad. Not even a little. The bird became your errand boy. Baby once tried to lock you in the guest room while he “dealt with something” (read: Romance having an emotional meltdown over not being the most popular Saja on TikTok that week), and you just smiled, waited for the door to click shut, and whispered, “Go.”
The bird flew off in an instant.
Thirty seconds later? You were free. Not because you broke out, because the bird had taken the keys right out of Abby’s pocket.
By the time Baby realized, you were already on the balcony, cup of tea in hand, staring out at the skyline.
He stood there, blinking at you like he’d forgotten who held the leash now.
And you just said, “Forgot to lock it better.”
Then you began testing your limits more.
Started walking into the boys’ rooms just to look at things.
Not for revenge. Not for sabotage. Just because you could.
The bird would perch on your shoulder like a little knight, ready to scream at the first sign of resistance. The tiger would trail behind, tail curling around your ankles, utterly unconcerned.
You stepped into Romance’s walk-in closet once and picked up his most dramatic silk shirt. Stared at yourself in the mirror.
He caught you.
Right in the doorway, mouth parted, hand already raised to start his usual flirty bullshit. But then he saw the cat, planted at your feet like a bouncer. And the bird, tilting its head on the top shelf.
He just smiled. “Looking good, angel.”
You didn’t answer. Just walked past him like he was the wallpaper.
And Jinu? Sweet, loser Jinu?
You loved him. Hated that you loved him. He was kind in a way the others weren’t. But he still let this happen. Let them take you. Let them keep you. Prolly planned it first place.
So now, when you walked past him and the tiger followed you instead, tail curling, purring like thunder? You didn’t smile. But you made sure to meet his eyes.
He didn’t say a word. Just looked quietly… wistful. Like someone who realized they were losing custody.
It evolved.
You started using the animals as social armor. Like a literal shield.
And when you were sad, you didn’t cry anymore. You just curled up on your bed. Cat to your left, bird to your right, a pillow behind your head.
You didn’t ask them for comfort. Didn’t need to.
They came anyway.
The bird would bring you shiny things. Screws. Buttons. Random rings from the boys though none of them fit you. The tiger would press itself so close you couldn’t tell where it ended and you began.
While Romance?
He wanted you melting in his arms.
Mystery?
Wanted to be close without touching. Wanted to be inside your head, buried deep.
Baby?
Fuck if he knew what he wanted. He kicked your chair one day. Once stood behind you for twenty silent minutes just breathing like he was working up the courage to insult you.
Abby?
He laughed around you too hard, wrestled the others right in front of you, made a whole show of being the alpha male. But he was a fool for you.
And Jinu?
He’s an actual loser beneath the pretty looks and the perfect little nose.
So yeah, but then, Romance started brushing his teeth before speaking to you. Like a ritual. Mystery started growling less when you were around, which for him was practically a love letter. Abby cleaned up. Dusted things. Accidentally said “please.” Baby not kicking your legs out from under you. Jinu just turned into a bigger loser on the inside, but kept trying to make this better for you, even if you didn’t cooperate.
The animals saw all of it. And they did not approve.
Because you didn’t know.
You didn’t notice. You were busy staying away, surviving. You saw the boys as chaos. As danger. As captors who sometimes made you laugh and sometimes made you ache.
The feelings—the real ones—went under your radar.
But not under the animals’.
When Romance leaned too close? The bird would flap into his face. No warning. No elegance. Just a sudden flutter of feathers and caws that sounded exactly like laughter.
When Abby tried to ask you if you wanted to “maybe watch a movie or whatever” the bird pecked his bicep hard enough to leave a bruise.
When Jinu hovered nearby with something stupidly soft in his eyes, the bird would interrupt him. Or just drop a bottle cap or a coin in your lap so you don’t pay attention to Jinu.
Baby started swearing at it in four different tongues atp.
Mystery tried to lunge at it once. It bit his ear and lived to tell the tale.
The tiger would lie between you and the boys.
Abby once tried to casually sit next to you on the couch. The cat climbed his legs, sat on his chest, and would not move.
Jinu reached for your hand to help you up from the floor. The cat headbutted your knees and knocked you forward into its side instead.
Romance, being Romance, tried to say, “C’mon, angel, don’t you miss male attention?” and got slapped with a tail so hard it knocked his earring out.
Mystery didn’t even try anymore.
It liked Baby until Baby dared to talk to you.
You started noticing, eventually. Little things. The boys standing just a touch farther back. The way they’d hesitate. The way the animals always showed up when things got emotionally warm.
You see, animals feel things.
These animals—your tiger, your bird—didn’t read facial expressions, they read pulses. They didn’t care what someone said, they cared how their blood moved when they said it.
And when it came to the boys?
Well.
There was a lot to feel.
It wasn’t obvious at first. Not to you. You’d gotten used to their bullshit, Romance’s sex-drenched nonsense, Baby’s passive-aggressive jabs, Abby’s jock energy, Mystery’s whole “I will kill for you and then disappear into the walls” thing, and whatever that was going on with Jinu at this point. It all just blurred together.
So you didn’t notice. Not really. But the animals did. They noticed how Romance’s heartbeat spiked when you walked into a room. How Baby’s eyes always drifted your way when he thought no one was looking. How Abby got quieter around you. How Mystery watched you. The longing in Jinu’s eyes.
They noticed all of it.
And they were annoyed.
Because you weren’t interested. Or—more accurately—you were avoiding them.
Smart, honestly. They kidnapped you. They tortured you. They didn’t deserve you. The tiger and the bird agreed. But also? They were sick of how complicated this was getting.
Because you used them. Not maliciously. Just instinctively. Used the tiger as a wall, a buffer. You’d pet his big dumb head while Abby sat three feet away, clearly trying to find a way to say “Hey, I think about kissing you.” Used the bird as a barrier. Let it perch on your shoulder while Baby ranted about “how annoying humans are.” all while stealing glances at your mouth like he wanted to insult you with his tongue.
You built your fortress with fur and feathers.
And it worked. Too well.
The boys couldn’t get close. Not emotionally. Not physically.
So the animals did what any emotionally exhausted roommates would do in this situation:
They turned on you.
Not in a cruel way. They still loved you. Worshipped you, really. But they made an unspoken decision, one cloudy afternoon while you were napping under a sunbeam and the boys were scattered across the living room pretending not to look at you:
They were going to wingman.
It started with the bird.
Because wing. Heh. Get it? Bird and wing. Heh. No? Okay fuck me then.
The bird was smart. Smarter than the boys, probably. And it had watched long enough. It knew Baby was close to blowing his whole “I don’t give a fuck” cover. Knew Romance was a breath away from writing a ten-minute ballad. Knew Jinu was already in love with you and just politely suppressing it like it was a kink he was embarrassed to name.
So the bird started nudging.
You’d sit on the couch and suddenly there was space. The bird wouldn’t perch on your shoulder, it’d go to the windowsill. Leave a gap between you and whoever else was there.
You didn’t notice at first.
But the boys did.
Baby slid into that spot once, acting casual, only to freeze when you didn’t stop him. The bird cawed once, loud and approving, and he nearly passed out from the sheer rush of it.
Romance caught on fast. Of course he did. He followed the bird’s lead. Started showing up wherever you were, but not pushing. Just… hovering. Letting the silence between you stretch, but always being available.
One day, the bird landed on your desk, dropped a hairpin in front of you like a gift, and then pecked the air, once toward you, once toward Romance, then flew off like it had more matchmaking to do.
Romance grinned.
The tiger, bless him, was dumb as rocks if I haven’t said that already.
Not in a way that made him useless. Just… slow. He got the vibes but not the nuance. He’d see you sitting on the floor with your tea, and instead of guarding you like usual, he’d suddenly get up, walk over to Abby, and flop down directly across Abby’s legs, purring.
You figured it was just laziness. The boys figured it was random.
But it wasn’t. It was strategy.
The tiger started “accidentally” leaving you unguarded. Would find other laps to sprawl in. Would go snuggle with Jinu while you were in the kitchen, and then not-so-subtly nudge Jinu toward the counter you were slicing apples at.
One time, the tiger headbutted you so hard you stumbled right into Mystery’s arms.
You were too embarrassed to meet his eyes, but he didn’t move. Just stood there, chest barely rising, holding you.
The bird gave a low whistle from the top of the bookshelf.
Success.
You still didn’t get it. Still thought the boys were just annoying and bored and full of themselves, and sure, yeah, they were.
But they were also soft for you. Desperate in five different flavors.
Romance flirted because it was the only language he knew.
Baby insulted you because sincerity felt like peeling his skin off.
Abby got awkward and loud because being vulnerable wasn’t part of his programming.
Mystery didn’t speak, but his gaze could hollow out gods.
Jinu looked at you like he was waiting for an apology for falling in love. Loser. Loser. Have I said loser?
And the animals were tired of watching them fail.
So now? They interfered.
The bird started timing things.
Like, you’d wake up late and shuffle bleary-eyed into the kitchen, hair a mess, t-shirt barely hanging off your shoulder, and who would already be there, hair perfectly mussed, sweatpants low on his hips, humming like he didn’t spend twenty minutes prepping for this moment?
Romance.
Acting casual, like he didn’t know what time you usually got up. Like the bird didn’t land on his chest that morning and scream until he rolled out of bed and stood in the kitchen waiting.
“Oh hey, angel. Didn’t see you there.”
Sure. Sure, he didn’t.
The bird would then perch on the cabinet and just… watch. Casually. As if to say: Are you gonna offer to share your grapefruit or not, slut?
Romance would usually cave. He always did. Ended up leaning against the counter, peeling segments for you like he wasn’t plotting a second kidnapping, this time to steal your heart.
Then came Abby’s training arc.
The tiger loved Abby. They wrestled constantly. It was honestly cute.
But after the cat started picking you over him more and more, the dumbass man started sulking.
So the tiger changed tactics. Went back to Abby, started play-fighting again, only now? It was instructional. He’d nudge Abby toward you. Literally press his entire dumb weight against Abby’s side until he was leaning awkwardly into your space. It got to the point where you’d be sipping tea and Abby would be hovering six inches from your thigh, face red, like he couldn’t physically move away.
You glanced at him once, eyebrow raised. “You good?”
He panicked. “Tiger’s heavy. I—he’s like gravity. Just—just ignore me.”
You didn’t. You smirked, leaned into it. Let him sweat.
Tiger purred, proud and dumb.
The bird got meaner with Baby.
Because that boy would not get his shit together.
He liked you. He didn’t say it, he insulted you, mostly. Called you names. Acted like your presence was an inconvenience. But the bird knew. Knew by how Baby always looked when you left the room. How quiet he got.
So the bird escalated.
Started sabotaging Baby’s entire life.
Pushed his shampoo off the shelf. Hid his things. Took his makeup brushes and dropped them in your lap like “you fix him.”
Mystery was harder. He didn’t talk. Just blushed sometimes and looked.
But the tiger? The tiger loved him.
Not like Abby-love. No wrestling. Just a weird, quiet affection. They’d sit near each other and stare into the void. Besties.
So one day, when you were curled up in a corner with a book, Mystery watching you from across the room, the tiger just got up, yawned, and walked over to Mystery. Sat down next to him. And then began shoving him toward you.
It was slow. Methodical. Giant nudges of his hip. Every time Mystery tried to readjust, the tiger would just headbutt him again.
You didn’t look up until Mystery was practically pressed to your side, hands curled into fists like he was trying not to implode.
You blinked at him. He blinked back from behind his hair.
The bird whistled from the ceiling, scandalized.
And of course, Jinu.
He needed the most help, surprisingly.
And his animals? His bird, his tiger? They were betrayers.
They picked sides. Yours. Every time.
But even they couldn’t deny Jinu deserved something. Anything.
So they started making moments. The bird would “accidentally” drop your hair tie behind the couch and then screech until Jinu came to help you retrieve it. The tiger would pretend to be sick, lay on the floor groaning, tail twitching, until you and Jinu both had your hands on him at the same time, pressed shoulder-to-shoulder.
But the real win?
One night, you had a nightmare. Not screaming. Just… subtle. A whimper. A shift.
You didn’t wake up alone.
The tiger of course was already there. But the bird? The bird had flown to Jinu’s room. Pecked his face until he woke. Led him to your door. Then flew off.
Jinu didn’t say a word. Just sat on the edge of your bed, hand barely touching your ankle through the blanket, presence warm.
When you woke?
You didn’t even question it.
You just reached for him.
And he stayed.
The animals? They saw the cracks forming. The warmth. The beginning of something real.
You weren’t running from the boys anymore. You were watching them. Smiling, sometimes. Letting your guard down inch by inch.
At first, it was full resistance.
Understandably.
You were taken. Tied up. Questioned. Threatened. Occasionally growled at (Mystery), seduced at (Romance), ignored (Baby), coddled (Jinu), or dragged into gym drills against your will (Abby).
All this was going on, but after a while, it changed. It sure did.
Let’s start with the towel incident.
You were just trying to exist. You stepped out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel, one towel. Hair damp, steam still rising off your skin. You were planning to make a quick run to your room, grab your clothes, be invisible. No problem.
Except the tiger was waiting outside the door. Sitting. Like a bouncer.
He blinked up at you, tail wagging lazily, clearly delighted with the sight of you looking human, fresh and flushed and a little vulnerable.
“No.” you told him flatly. “Absolutely not.”
He made a little chirping noise. Then stood. Walked straight to Jinu’s room.
And began pawing the door.
You turned so fast your towel slipped, and you were half-wrestling with it, trying not to flash your whole ass to the hallway, when the door opened and there was Jinu, shirtless, looking dazed.
Tiger shoved past him, headbutted his hip, then trotted back to you.
You just stared at him. “What part of this looks like a good time for socialization?”
Tiger didn’t care. Sat beside you. Tail thumping. Looking at Jinu.
Jinu coughed, clearly trying to look anywhere but directly at your legs. “I—um—I’ll get you a robe?”
You turned and marched to your room. Tiger followed.
It also did this with Romance once, like… three days later.
He stopped in his tracks. His gaze dropped. Saw you. The towel. The death grip on your chest. The tiger beside you wagging its tail.
Romance blinked once. Twice.
“…I love you.” he said.
You slammed the door in his face.
The tiger scratched at the other side.
Another time you were sitting on the floor, playing with the bird (who was dragging a stolen earring across the carpet). The tiger was curled nearby. Abby walked in, sipping a smoothie, mid-conversation with Mystery.
He barely looked at you. Just nodded like a bro. “Sup.”
You nodded back. Fine. Neutral.
The tiger? Not fine. The tiger got up. Walked over. Headbutted Abby so hard he stumbled forward. Right into your space.
He blinked. You blinked.
“I didn’t do that.” he said quickly.
The tiger laid down behind him. Boxed him in. Big paws on either side. Nowhere to go.
You raised an eyebrow. “Trapped?”
Abby rubbed the back of his neck. “He does this sometimes.”
You smirked. “He definitely does.”
You sat like that for twenty minutes. Abby awkward. You amused. The tiger thrilled.
Once, you were on your way to the big bathroom, towel in hand, cat trailing after you.
Until Romance walked out of that said bathroom, dripping wet. Wrapped in a towel that was too low. Hair a mess. Muscles glistening like he moisturizes with fucking coconut oil.
You turned to leave. Immediately.
But the bird screeched at you. Full wingspan out, blocking the way.
Romance blinked at the scene. Slowly. Then smiled, infuriatingly. “Hey, angel. Want the shower next or wanna share?”
You narrowed your eyes at the bird. “This is manipulative.”
It cawed. Unrepentant. Tiger didn’t move. Just smiled.
You walked away anyway. But you heard Romance laughing under his breath.
And now my favorite fact, the tiger thinks Abby is the ideal mate.
In tiger logic, this made sense. Abby was strong, loud, covered in sweat 80% of the time. He gave great belly rubs. Wrestled daily. Brought snacks. He was affectionate. He scratched that perfect itch just above the haunches. He was the best pillow in the apartment. He even kissed the top of tiger’s dumb head once after a workout, and that was it. The tiger was sold. Which meant you should fuck him. Immediately.
So when you were walking down the hall, the tiger slid between your legs, because the fact that you and Abby weren’t rolling around like tiger and his favorite blanket was deeply upsetting to him. So it forced you to grab the nearest thing for balance.
That thing is Abby, coming out of his room in a tank top, completely unaware of the trap.
You crashed into him, full-body.
His hand caught your waist.
You both froze. Inches apart. Breathing hard.
You parted awkwardly. Tripping over words. Betrayed.
Another time, you were in the kitchen, trying to chop onions in peace for a little pasta you were making. Romance walked by in nothing but sweatpants and the ego of a man who knows he looks like sex in bad lighting.
You ignored him, because he was being normal for once.
Until the bird dive-bombed your cutting board, snatched an onion ring, and flies into Romance’s face.
And then—slip. His pants slide just a bit too low.
Just slightly too low.
He grabbed at them, but the damage is done.
You froze.
He froze.
A beat of absolute silence.
Romance coughed, stepped back, voice slightly higher. “This is not how I wanted you to see that.”
You blinked. Slowly. “…You’re not wearing underwear?”
“I was! Sussie did something to the string—! I swear—!”
You sliced another onion, deadpan. “Romance, if your bird ever takes your pants off in my vicinity again, I will genuinely skin you alive.”
The tiger walked by, saw Romance half-naked and flustered, saw you not running, and just purred.
And the bird can be so much worse.
He doesn’t understand shame. Or nudity. Or human social etiquette.
So one night, Jinu freshly out of the shower, hair damp, robe loose, looking absolutely dangerous. You were in the hall, about to turn away, because respect, when the bird slammed into your back and pushes you forward.
Right into Jinu’s chest.
The robe opened a little.
Chest. Abs. A low “Oh—shit, sorry—” from him, all while trying to adjust without flashing you completely.
You tried to stumble back.
The bird blocked you.
Jinu was panicked but gentle, saying “He’s been doing this for days. I—I’m so sorry—do you want me to call him off?”
“I don’t think you can.”
“I really can’t.”
“It’s okay. I’ve seen worse.”
Yeah, that was… awkward.
Don’t even get me started on when you were bending over to tie your shoe.
Baby walked in. He wasn’t expecting you there. You weren’t expecting him. But it happens.
He stared.
You glanced back, casual. “What?”
“Nothing.”
Too fast.
You stood, slow. He was still staring. Eyes flick down. Back up. Red face. Like he’s trying to look away but physically can’t.
Sussie swooped down. Landed on the dresser. Pecked Baby’s crotch.
Right. On. Target.
He flinched. Hard. Then grabbed the bird and stormed off with it to give it a big fucking talk.
Now that I’m telling stories, you and Mystery had a quiet rapport, you didn’t hate him the way you hated the others at first. He didn’t try to touch you. Didn’t speak unless needed. He’d just sit in your radius.
But you hadn’t made any moves. No glances. No flirting.
So the bird forced you to.
Yes, even Mystery got dragged into it. Which was frankly unfair because the man couldn’t even speak in full sentences most days and now he was being cornered into moments with you planned by a bird with a vendetta and a cat with the IQ of a carrot.
One morning, you were heading to the balcony. Coffee in hand, half-asleep. You slid the door open, and the bird flew at your face.
You yelped, dropped the mug, and ducked.
When you looked up, Mystery was right there behind you. Not just close. Pressed to you. His arm shot out to keep you from falling, palm on your waist, mouth just behind your ear.
You both went still. Heat. Breath. Your spine curved like a reflex.
His voice was low. Rough. “You okay?”
You nodded. Too fast. “Sussie’s a dick.”
He didn’t move. “Yes.”
You were sweating. You blamed the coffee. Which you spilled. Which you never cleaned up because you ran.
The bird cackled for two solid minutes.
The animals didn’t understand discomfort. They didn’t recognize that a towel barely hanging off a hip meant anything bad. They didn’t know what erections were. They didn’t know that pushing you chest-first into Mystery’s lap was not okay.
They just saw affection. Saw tension. Saw chemistry and warmth and love, even if none of you could admit it yet.
They didn’t care about the rules of human touch.
They cared that you belonged.
Still took part in your little stunts though, for an example, you’d be sitting on the couch, and Romance would try to get all up in your space with that low voice and hungry stare, all “So, sweetheart, want to sit in my lap while we pick a movie—?”
And you’d snap your fingers.
Bird. Instant.
Lands on Romance’s thigh and pecks his dick.
Hard.
Romance yelps. You sip your tea. The bird preens.
Other times? Tiger plays the long game. Not because he’s smart—he’s not—but because he’s loyal. Which means, if he sees you frowning? Or crossing your arms? Or if anyone raises their voice even slightly near you?
He’s there.
Blocking. Nudging. Sitting on laps that weren’t offering.
Abby once called you “bratty”, and you didn’t even have to say anything, tiger stood up, walked across the room, and pushed Abby into a wall.
No claws. No growl. Just brute, slow, emotional pressure.
Abby’s response: “Okay. Okay, she’s not bratty. She’s lovely. I was wrong. Jesus.”
So yeah, they were still loyal to you, but no doubt that they also enjoyed doing… this, to you and the boys.
Another story incoming, it was a slow afternoon. The boys were lounging in the living room, half-dressed, lazy, complaining about annoying fans, humans in general.
You were sitting on the floor, half-watching them argue over whether or not Mystery had eaten someone recently. You mentioned, offhandedly, “It’s weird how your marks aren’t always visible. When do they even show up?”
Pause.
Romance smiled. “You paying that much attention, angel?”
You did not respond. Because no. You absolutely were not watching the way their bodies lit up violet when they got serious. You were not obsessing over the curling marks down Abby’s spine or the ones that ran from Baby’s jaw to his throat. You were not thinking about the ones on Jinu’s ribs.
No.
Not thinking about it at all.
And then, the bird turned its head. Looked at you. Looked at the boys. Looked down.
It flew across the room and landed square on Abby’s thigh.
Then it started pecking at the waistband of his sweatpants.
The boys went silent.
You choked on air.
The bird made a triumphant caw, grabbed the elastic waistband in its beak, and yanked to show you where else were patterns.
Romance dropped his drink, howled with laughter. The others watched with mouths agape.
The tiger, by the way? In the corner. Smiling. Like he understood exactly zero percent of the conversation but yes yes, this is family time, very good, I love when people scream. He rolled onto his back and started snoring.
The bird did not succeed in full pantsing Abby, unfortunately. (Or fortunately, depending on your trauma levels and whether or not you were ready to see what the demon gymrat was packing.)
Eventually, Jinu pried the bird off and carried it out of the room while it cawed in protest. “Sorry.” he told you gently. “He’s just… like this.”
“No.” you gasped, tears still in your eyes. “Let him cook.”
Jinu did NOT understand what that meant.
I’m carried away with the little stories, so once you were reading. That’s all. Just sitting cross-legged on the floor in front of the couch, trying to enjoy a little peace. The tiger was behind you, his big warm bulk nestled against the back of the couch.
He was snoring. You were ignoring him. So far, so good.
Then Romance walked in. Stretching. Fresh out of the shower.
He gave you one of his usual morning, sweetheart purrs and flopped onto the couch behind you.
The tiger lifted his head.
Looked between you and Romance.
Then stood up.
Walked around. Circled twice. And then shoved his giant body behind you—right between you and the couch—forcing you to fall backward. You slammed right into Romance’s chest, book flying.
“Shit—” You tried to sit up.
Romance’s arms went around you on instinct and he laughed into your neck. “Tiger. Buddy. I owe you one.”
You tried to get up. The tiger pushed his paw down on your thigh. Kept you firmly planted in Romance’s lap.
You could feel it.
Yeah. A dick. Under you. An actual demon dick.
Romance’s breath stuttered. His grip tightened. You both froze.
The tiger just yawned. It didn’t give a fuck, if it was capable of that. But what it does have is loyalty. And love. And the kind of warmth that makes Abby say shit like, “I’d literally die for this idiot.”
(Which he said. Once. While scratching the tiger’s belly. The tiger’s leg kicked like a dog. Abby cooed. Everyone else gagged.)
So yeah, it kept happening. Different variations.
Bird dropping your things into Baby’s lap just so that he can hold it in the air while you try to reach it.
Tiger pinning you to the kitchen floor mid-stretch and Jinu walking in right as your ass is perfectly arched.
Bird playing middleman in a game of fetch where the only “fetch” item was your bra (don’t ask).
Tiger shoving Abby forward into you while you were drinking tea, leading to a splash, a tangle of limbs, and somehow a hand on your thigh that didn’t move for a full minute.
Bird placing your hand into Mystery’s.
You stopped questioning it.
Not because it wasn’t weird. It was hella weird. But you started to like it. Started noticing how each boy reacted.
Romance would smirk but get real quiet, like he didn’t want to ruin it.
Abby would blush and joke but keep his hand a little too long on your hip.
Mystery wouldn’t say a word, just breathe slower, closer.
Jinu would help you up, apologize, but his hand would shake a little when he let go.
Baby always cursed under his breath. Acted annoyed. But never looked away. Never left.
Yeah. So this.
From being your tiny rebel army of “fuck these boys” to your two ride-or-die little assistants, your unofficial bodyguards and besties, your only allies…
To this.
You remember when the bird used to scream like a kettle every time one of the boys so much as entered your airspace. When it would nip at fingers, throw things at heads, or squawk aggressively.
You remember when the tiger would lie down in doorways just to block them from approaching. When it used to shove its giant head between you and anyone who got within arm’s length, and just sit there.
And now look at that and where we are now. From keeping the guys away from you to nudging them forward.
You used to count the minutes between interactions. Every word out of their mouths was another slice of evidence: they weren’t normal. They weren’t kind. They weren’t human.
Now you count the beats of silence where they try not to stare.
You count the seconds Romance goes without making a joke when you walk into the room, how long he watches before the cocky mask slips into something earnest. You count the times Jinu passes this and that, saying nothing, eyes too soft for a captor. You count the fucking accidental tenderness in Baby’s insults, how he calls you “brat” like he wants you to call him back. You count every time Abby gives you space… and then doesn’t. Even Mystery is gentler now, in his way. Not less feral, just targeted. Still jumps Romance at least once a day. Still growls like a dog you shouldn’t pet. But with you? It’s touch-without-warning. Steady presence. A rare nod. A soft noise in his throat when you leave the room too fast, like something he can’t not track.
You’re still resistant. Still watchful. Still technically their hostage.
But you’re not so sure where the lines are anymore.
You’re reaching for something on a high shelf? Bird swoops in and knocks it off, straight into Romance’s hands.
You’re walking across the living room? He dive-bombs your shoulder and oh no, you stumble directly into Abby’s chest.
You’re trying to stay in your room? The bird perches on your head and just vibrates until you give up and find Mystery.
Tiger’s method is simpler. Dumber. More endearing.
If you sit down, he sits beside you.
If you stand up, he walks behind you.
If you walk into a room, he lies down and points his whole tiger body toward the boy you like least that day.
So yeah.
From being your precious little babies who protected you, they’ve become your worst best allies. They love you. But they also ship the hell out of you.
You just wanted peace.
Now you’ve got five demon boys circling, a bird playing 4D chess with your sex life, and a tiger who thinks cuddling with the enemy is the only true path.
Honestly?
You’re starting to wonder if you even want to escape anymore.
THIS IS NOT CANON TO THE ORIGINAL STORY LINE OF THE ASSISTANT READER SERIES!
I reblogged her late last year and my 2024 has been very satisfying work-wise and (secure enough to not stress out) money-wise so far. Money Snake is wise and good.
synopsis: You can't seem to fall asleep, so you seek out your favourite demon!
pt1 (lucifer)
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The light from your D.D.D is painfully bright in the darkness of your bedroom. You squint at the screen, trying to get your eyes adjusted to it. The time stares back at you in silent mockery.
4:00 a.m.
You groan and lower the device, letting it softly land beside your pillow. You just can't seem to fall asleep today.
You had already given up on scrolling a long time back and even completed reading that ridiculously good fanfic series about an hour ago. There isn't a test tomorrow (at least not one you can remember). So why was sleep still evading you?
A cool breeze from outside flows in and moonlight slips through the gaps in the fluttering curtains, casting slow-moving shadows on the ceiling. Somewhere in the distance, a devildom creature howls. The ticking of the grandfather clock down the hall seems especially loud today...
You turn to your side and close your eyes once more, really committing this time— trying to relax your muscles, taking deep breaths, trying to get lost in some made-up scenario. And that's when your brain decides it's the perfect time to remind you of that one embarrassing moment from a few years ago.
No, you were absolutely not going to think about that. You pull the blanket up to your chin and try again. The pillow feels too warm, the blanket feels wrong and you can feel your toes touching and ughhh—
You sit up. Yeah, this was not working. Okay, think. What will help you sleep? You have already tried all the usual methods and...wait...
Your mind wanders to a certain demon.
Time to change tactics.
Lulu (lucifer):
Lucifer had definitely noticed you slipping into bed beside him. Nothing evades the first-born. But he had chalked it up to his overworked mind conjuring up something nice to cope after a stressful day. A small, selfish dream. But, a dream, nonetheless. So, imagine his surprise when he wakes up in the morning, only to find your warm body still curled up beside him.
Lucifer wasn't someone who startled easily. The world could be ending and he'd still be as calm and poised as ever. But, this? This has caught him off-guard. He doesn't dare move, for fear that you might wake up and the moment would end.
He has observed you goof around with his brothers, lead and get led into their daily antics. The way you laugh so easy around Mammon, the way you let Asmodeus be his clingy self, the way even Satan's unpredictable wrath doesn't scare you off. And as much it swelled his pride, seeing you so at-ease with those he considered his family, it had also given birth to another, more bitter feeling— envy. Lucifer couldn't help but notice that you were much more guarded around him; that the softness you showed his brothers was carefully rationed when it came to him.
He had tried to convince himself that it didn't bother him, that this was the more favourable dynamic. His role demanded him to be intimidating and more authoritative than his brothers, after all. But, who is he fooling? The truth is, his pride stops him from admitting that he wants you to not be so scared of him. To act with him as you would with any of his brothers.
So, when he realizes you chose him as your safe haven among everyone else in the House of Lamentation? That you had willingly let yourself to be so close to him? His heart does a traitorous flip, uncharacteristic of the Avatar of Pride.
Lucifer gently places his hand on your back as you nuzzle closer to him. Yeah, you aren't really helping lessen his pride, MC.
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A/N: Look who finally posted a fic again
Trying a new format with my writing hehe. The inspiration struck me last night when i just couldn't fall asleep for some reason. I tried relistening to some horror podcasts cuz that usually works but it didn't. Imagining this finally made me fall asleep lmao. Not a huge fan of how this turned out but I'm happy to finally be in a writing mood. I enjoyed the process, so it's a success!
I'll (eventually) write the other brothers too dw (and maybe even the rest of the dateables). In fact, I was going to include mammon's part in this one (hence why I labelled Lucifer's part separately) but I also want to post this before I go to sleeeep