Here Comes the Rebrand

Kris, she/her, queer and poly, on the edge of 40. Back after a break and figuring out what I'm doing here. You may have previously known me as Kiera, Hobbes or Aegypius.

[khanuckle-deactivated20250628]

[what-even-is-thiss]

Religion in fantasy worlds: Everyone believes the exact same things about Green Nature Goddess and has official rituals for her that are the same everywhere

Religion irl: Technically it’s heresy for me to worship this skeleton but my spiritual advisor said that it’s legit so I’m gonna keep giving it offerings of yogurt

[what-even-is-thiss]

Religion in fantasy worlds: We’ve gotta pour water over this statue or else the god will get angry

Religion irl: We’ve gotta pour water over this statue? Why? Idk man that’s just what you do. Just do it alright.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Religion in fantasy worlds: These are the rules. The rules are law. Nobody can break the rules.

Religion irl: Okay you say that there are “rules” but how exactly are we defining “rules” here? Like is a suggestion a rule? How are we defining suggestion? No come back. Listen. Are we going by nuance in the original language or are translations fine or-

[what-even-is-thiss]

High control religions/cults recruiting in fantasy worlds: Join us! For we shall all eat the moon! This is a legitimate position to have!

High control religions/cults recruiting irl: We have free snacks. That shirt looks sooo cute on you btw. What, you heard that we wanna eat the moon? The media is always telling lies about us you know. We may have some unorthodox opinions about the moon but, tell you what. Come get some snacks, make some new friends, maybe chat about the moon a bit. See what you think. We’ve got pizza.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Religions in fantasy worlds: We must make a sacrifice to appease the gods! *draws up a sacrifice circle and completely destroys the sacrifice*

Religions irl: We must make a sacrifice to appease the gods! *has a communal barbecue*

[redstonedust]

magical girl shows are good because their attacks will be something like "super love sunshine friendship beam" but make no mistake, super love sunshine friendship beam WILL end you. super love sunshine friendship beam will leave a crater in the ground where you once stood. you cannot understimate the power of super love sunshine friendship beam.

[publicschoolstories]

There’s someone who has their iPhone named “hot single horses in your area” and they airdrop people pictures of horses randomly. Nobody knows who it is. Once, during an assembly, the laptop that the projector was from had airdrop turned on, and in the middle of a presentation about bullying, it popped up in front of the entire school. HOT SINGLE HORSES IN YOUR AREA WANTS TO SHARE AN IMAGE. A picture of a horse, with text in bubble letters over it saying “available”

[dragon-in-a-fez]

probably a good thing this wasn’t at the school I used to teach at where the principal was arrested for embezzling school funds to buy horses

[pointnclick]

"we live in an uncaring universe." sorry the special planet full of beauty and animals and food literally growing out of the ground isnt good enough for you. i guess

[gurlonawalk]

every time i see a woman i’m like good for her. coolest girl alive

[gurlonawalk]

this was meant to say every time i see a woman riding a skateboard but also yes

[trashcangimmick]

[kineticpenguin]

taken.

A web page that tells you what your browser gave away the moment you arrived. No login, no form, no permission. Most pages do this. None of

[autistobrat]

scientists are experimenting on cross-breeding a crab and a cheetah; things could go sideways real fast

[hils79]

I am deleting this app off my phone

[woodwool]

severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person

[charlataninred]

Character duo where one *remembers I don’t like fitting characters into trope boxes* is a completely fleshed out and realised person *remembers treating characters as real people and not story devices written with intent is bad* who is written by the author and *remembers death of the author* uh. And *fumbles and drops my pile of queue cards* ah fuck wait no *the menacing horse* what was that.

[figs-and-cigs]

There's something so magical about feeling yourself falling in love with someone new and then getting to come home and tell my husband whom I love so dearly, all the bubbling excited details.

[ceruleanheaven]

choosing how many !s to put at the end of the sentence and how many 3s to put in a <3

[leeeen-90]

people who only use conventional social media are so funny bc they’ll casually be like “can I see your tumblr??” are you Insane. this is no instagram or twitter. this is my vault of secrets

[beardedmrbean]

[sonandheirofnothinginparticular]

[gonzos-humansona]

Woman in front of me in line at the caffe nero changed my life yesterday when she ordered a prosciutto sandwich but pronounced "prosciutto" like it rhymed with mosquito. "Pruh-squee-toe."

I heard this person say "uhhhh yeah can I get a prosquito sandwich please?" and I knew I'd never be the same. Prosquito. Prosquito. Its everything to me. I haven't been able to stop saying that lmfao. This is my spinch. This is my bagel and creem cheems. This is my ranibow sprimkle.

friends and family are already tired of me going crazy over prosquito but its so special to me