(bird noises) @gavinbird - Tumblr Blog

idk where to even go to see what's going on w that shit now can you fill me in bc. boy ive been here since 2013 and im the mean petty kind of gay.

there’s a massive info dump on reddit broken into three parts that really sums everything up. also, @juggey has compiled a LOT of information with tags to help you sort through what you’re looking for.

reddit links: 1, 2 & 3

#ryan haywood #info

seeing RH manipulate those women by threatening suicide is giving me ~flashbacks~

#I hate him sm #rh

samsrowena

and immediately my mind goes to every AH argument where this motherfucker could NOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT admit he was wrong

fuckyouroosterteethproductions

this is a legitimate question: since Barb is in charge of "socials" at RT, how has she not lost her job since this is the second/third major incident that's happened over social media regarding RT as a whole?

Please tell me more about how it’s a woman’s fault for not monitoring other people’s secret private lives when it’s not her fucking job.

#just imagine thinking that one person at a company #or even the company as a whole #can be aware of what it's MANY EMPLOYEES DO in their VERY PRIVATE LIVES #if ryans own wife didnt know then how tf was barbara supposed to know lmao

the shock has settled and now I’m genuinely depressed about all this lmao I’m on the verge of tears how did this happen

#why do men #my bar for men has always been so fucking low but I really believed ah were different #idk my mistake ig but fuck this is an absolute gut punch

roostershaveteethyoufool

Shout-out to all y'all motherfuckers who've been in this fandom since 2012 or whenever minecraft episode 1 launched. I couldnt imagine how id feel if I was in your shoes.

gavinbird

the worst thing about this is while it’s not technically illegal and all parties were seemingly consensual, that’s SO up for debate because would these fans have slept with a married man had they not been, y’know, fans?

ghosthuntershane

As someone who is studying sexual health and has had several classes on sexual abuse and sexual violence, I gotta say, the line between sexual abuse and two consensual people engaging in sexual activities is very thin when it comes to the relationship between a celebrity and a fan.

pepsimayo

I feel like it’s not though. Like there’s a power imbalance but that’s only manipulated if it was used in exchange for other things - like if there was some implied financial, professional, or personal benefit beyond the sexual satisfaction both parties were seeking. If he had given them certain privileges (or implied he was going to) then that would be an abuse of power. That’s one of the big issues with ‘groupies’ - not that it’s just sex, but that it’s sex in exchange for a benefit (touring with the band usually etc.)

But otherwise it’s not an abuse of power, even if these people were only attracted to him because of his celebrity status. They were sexually attracted to him, and entered into a sexual relationship with him consensually, and don’t appear to have done so for any advantage beyond sexual gratification. Perhaps they wouldn’t have otherwise been attracted to him, but they still acted freely.

A power imbalance can exist without it being abusive or toxic if it is not abused.

I mean otherwise you could argue that any super attractive person is coercing people into sex with them.

I mean we don’t know the full situation with Ryan so it’s entirely possible it was an abuse of power. But just because they were fans doesn’t necessarily mean that he was abusing that power. It depends on other factors.

Some of the images and screenshots were also fake, so determining exactly what is true and what isn’t is going to take a while to determine.

juggey

wrong hill to die on bud. even if you want to throw out everything besides tessa’s video, a teenage girl accidentally sent him a photo that was barely suggestive, just shoulders up that happened to show her bra strap. it wasn’t meticulously posed. it was not an invite to be sexual with her. he took it as one anyway. thats an abuse of power. i don’t understand your assertion that a power balance is only manipulated in quid pro quo. it’s not. i’ve been employed with universities and public schools. our sexual assault training is very clear about how sexual assault is NOT purely “you scratch my back i scratch yours”. if he was a high school teacher he would have been fired. if he was a college professor he would have been fired. he was sending photos of himself in his own merch in front of his own merch. he was on a fucking power/ego trip.

gavinbird

the worst thing about this is while it’s not technically illegal and all parties were seemingly consensual, that’s SO up for debate because would these fans have slept with a married man had they not been, y’know, fans?

ghosthuntershane

As someone who is studying sexual health and has had several classes on sexual abuse and sexual violence, I gotta say, the line between sexual abuse and two consensual people engaging in sexual activities is very thin when it comes to the relationship between a celebrity and a fan.

pepsimayo

I feel like it’s not though. Like there’s a power imbalance but that’s only manipulated if it was used in exchange for other things - like if there was some implied financial, professional, or personal benefit beyond the sexual satisfaction both parties were seeking. If he had given them certain privileges (or implied he was going to) then that would be an abuse of power. That’s one of the big issues with ‘groupies’ - not that it’s just sex, but that it’s sex in exchange for a benefit (touring with the band usually etc.)

But otherwise it’s not an abuse of power, even if these people were only attracted to him because of his celebrity status. They were sexually attracted to him, and entered into a sexual relationship with him consensually, and don’t appear to have done so for any advantage beyond sexual gratification. Perhaps they wouldn’t have otherwise been attracted to him, but they still acted freely.

A power imbalance can exist without it being abusive or toxic if it is not abused.

I mean otherwise you could argue that any super attractive person is coercing people into sex with them.

I mean we don’t know the full situation with Ryan so it’s entirely possible it was an abuse of power. But just because they were fans doesn’t necessarily mean that he was abusing that power. It depends on other factors.

Some of the images and screenshots were also fake, so determining exactly what is true and what isn’t is going to take a while to determine.

gavinbird

So, this power imbalance ‘doesn’t count’ for sexual gratification? Lmao this isn’t a band, it’s a company that utterly depends on support from fans. It IS an abuse of power as, like my og post, not many would probably sleep with a married person if they didn’t idolise them in the first place. That is coming across as victim blaming.

Like, Ryan can really come out and say the rumours are true, leave the company for it (or be forced to resign), and y’all still wanna show some sort of support for him lmfao

#ryan haywood #anyway the victim blaming here is totally unnecessary

gavinbird

the worst thing about this is while it’s not technically illegal and all parties were seemingly consensual, that’s SO up for debate because would these fans have slept with a married man had they not been, y’know, fans?

ghosthuntershane

As someone who is studying sexual health and has had several classes on sexual abuse and sexual violence, I gotta say, the line between sexual abuse and two consensual people engaging in sexual activities is very thin when it comes to the relationship between a celebrity and a fan.

#^#for anyone that thinks he simply 'made a mistake'

I’m here if anyone needs someone to vent to.

the worst thing about this is while it’s not technically illegal and all parties were seemingly consensual, that’s SO up for debate because would these fans have slept with a married man had they not been, y’know, fans?

#ryan haywood #this is actually heartbreaking

trust no man ever

#yes this is about ryan haywood