She’s Fictional But I Dont Care @gdjsnmd - Tumblr Blog

i absolutely love it when 911 trends. idk the plot or anybody’s names but checking to see if those guys are gay yet is a tradition i cannot break

gregtheeggboss

wait is this queerbaiting or is it just weirdly homoerotic i’d take either alternative to be honest

gregtheeggboss

i absolutely love it when 911 trends. idk the plot or anybody’s names but checking to see if those guys are gay yet is a tradition i cannot break

#911 fox

libertarirynn-deactivated202006

It took me too long to get this and once I did I was filled with rage.

squidwardhentaicles

I got this joke instantly, whore.

popegoodvibes-returns

Reblog and share if you understood the joke and OP is a whore of babylon

gdjsnmd

It hurts. I’m a decade closer to death, thank you.

noodlemanjpg-deactivated2021120

the boy with the million dollar smile!!!!!

demifiendrsa

My Hero Academia season 4 OP2

meangirlnurse

apparently at some point when my now-girlfriend and i were flirting with each other but not quite in a relationship, she asked me how i felt about pet names, to which i replied “well you have to call them something”

meangirlnurse

the fact that i have managed to end up in a relationship is really testament to my girlfriend’s patience

meangirlnurse

#your girlfriend is a moronsexual op

please don’t call my girlfriend a moron :(

meangirlnurse

wait

adventures-in-theatre

story time: presidential edition

so you know how everyone has a story

you know

like the story

like if you’re at a party and someone turns to you and says, tell the story

and you know exactly what they mean

the story

well

i have a story

and not unlike most good stories, it involves three key components:

barack obama

pre-2008 reebok sneakers

and the absolute earth-shattering horror you can only feel after making the worst mistake of your life

so here we go

it all began eight years ago

(i was a gangly child then)

and barack obama came to town

(when i was a young girl)

(my father took me out into the city)

(to see the president of the united states, obama)

(barack obama)

except it wasn’t the city but where my parents worked

and my mother was hired to take pictures of obama shaking the hands of others

(rich people)

(ceo’s)

(people who didn’t wear reeboks to meet the president)

so i skipped school to see obama

(naturally)

(but my teacher was a republican so it still counted as an absence)

and the adventure begun

but as i soon learned

most of the adventure was waiting in a large room with my mother and some secret service men for roughly eight hours

because there is no timing with obama

(barack obama)

no one can know when obama is supposed to be there

(barack obama)

there is no, like, obama warning system

(barack)

it’s just that one second he’s not there

and the next second

he’s there

(barack obama)

so it was eight hours

and i remember nothing from those eight hours except for when one of the secret service men tried to talk to me

‘how are your studies,’ he said

how’s school, he probably meant

but i didn’t understand at the time

i was a gangly child

i was scared

he was tall

(i cried)

and then all of a sudden

(about eight hours into the eight hours)

he was there

(barack obama)

he was beauty

he was grace

he was

(barack obama)

he walked into the room

he wasn’t wearing reeboks

(i noticed)

(i began to feel i’d made a mistake)

my mother took pictures of him shaking the hands of others

(rich people)

(ceo’s)

(none of whom were wearing reeboks)

and at the very end

obama began to leave

(barack obama)

i was happy enough to have graced his presence

but my parents

my parents were not happy

they needed more

‘mr. obama,’ they called

and they pointed to me

‘of course,’ obama said

(barack obama)

he’s so nice, i thought

and then it hit me

oh no, i thought

oh yes, my parents thought at some point, probably

i’m obama, obama thought, most likely

i was going to meet obama

up close and personal

obama

(barack obama)

the rest was a blur

and the next thing i knew i was there

with obama

(barack obama)

his hand was shaking my hand

his hand was on my hand

(nothing had ever felt so right)

‘so what’s you’re name,’ he asked

(with obama’s voice)

(because he was obama)

(barack obama)

and i almost forgot but i told him

and he said it correctly even though it’s weird

(obama said my name)

and we were off to a good start

how was i to know

how was i to know the horrors to come

‘so how old are you,’ he asked then

and that’s when this dream became a nightmare

‘twelve,’ i said

a seemingly innocent answer

but here’s the thing

i was

thirteen.

(thirteen)

(13)

(12+1)

(16-3)

(13.0)

(Thirteen.)

what have i done, i thought

(panic! at the election)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3LGopSVju4

i still don’t know why i did it

did i really forget?

did i do it for the thrill of the chase?

to see if i could?

maybe

but obama didn’t know

i did it, i thought, i lied

i lied to the president of the united states

i pulled it off

the greatest lie in history

the greatest heist

(i didn’t know what a heist was)

(i was thirteen)

‘oh so you’re in 6th grade then,’ obama said

shit.

i was so close

shit what do i say, i thought

the journey is not over

the nightmare rages on

what do i say

i open my mouth to say, yes

‘no,’ i say

what the fuck, i think

‘no i’m in 7th grade”

(because i was)

maybe he won’t know, i thought

but he did.

(obama’s been around the block)

(obama knows what’s up)

‘so you’re ahead of your class, then’ he said

(i wasn’t)

(i failed basic math at least twice by this time)

‘yes,’ i said, just wanting this nightmare to be over

just wanting the lie to end

for obama to call me out on my shit and arrest me

to spend the rest of my youth locked away in prison where i couldn’t hurt anyone any more with my lies

i waited

i waited for arrest

but arrest didn’t come

and that was even worse.

obama trusted me

obama thought i was a good kid

obama thought i was ahead of my class

(ahead of my class)

i let him down

i let obama down

(barack obama)

i watched him leave

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYNH1baA_7k

obama, i mouthed out after him

obama i’m sorry

(he trusted me)

why did i do it, you ask

i don’t know

after all these years

i still don’t know

it still haunts me

i still wake up at night, shaking, and i think

i lied to the president of the united states

(twice)

the photographic evidence of my nightmare hangs in my father’s office

i’m smiling through my pain

i’m wearing reeboks

obama is not

(barack obama)

i hope that someday, after obama’s retirement

we can put this all behind us and start anew

start fresh

(no more lies)

(no more deceit)

but i’m not naive

i know that we can never really go back

back to the way things were

five seconds after i met him but five seconds before i lied

but i can dream

i can hope

obama

obama i’m sorry

(barack obama)

yourfavpunchesnazis

you punch nazis!

(requested by anonymous)

yourfavpunchesnazis

tnystrk-exe

tunafishdraws-deactivated202003

If you dont think Red Riot Unbreakable is the manliest shit ever then we cant be friends

*thanks for the request @captain-sketch (♡ε♡ )*

blindbee

avodaco

me when i get my student loan

g8dtier

this is the money cat. reblog in 30 seconds and you will find yourself with more wealth

strikercorbie

#this is the only money cat i will reblog because it’s actually doing the manekineko pose151,646 notes (via lolwhutninja)

OMG YOU’RE RIGHT

nonespark-blog

and it has its right paw up! the correct paw for this. and from the markings on its ears, it looks like it might be a calico cat. which is the luckiest kind!

carrionbeast

extremely lucky cat

ladynorbert

I don’t even care if it actually works, I’m mostly reblogging because it’s freaking adorable.

sweet-cherry-fairy-deactivated2

cute cat and need money, good post, 10/10

allthenamesilikearetaken

in case anyones interested in the other versions

http://www.namaii.com/manekineko/maneki-neko-types.html

mmusclechan

Y’know I reblogged this a bit ago and was saved from financial probation and getting kicked out of school because of it, just mere months from graduation. Got a call from the financial aid advisor telling me that they made a mistake with filing my account (or some other sort of clerical error) and said that, basically, they owe me money. Welp.

winjennster

Last time I reblogged the money cat, I won two $100 gift cards at work.

doreenchartreuse

berdly has been found dead in hometown

zorbonaut

Today is the only day you can legally reblog this.

birdsareblooming

FINALLY I FOUND IT

mamar12

The best deltarune post and i’m just 1 hour away from being too late at fiding it

axslingingaskansweringslasher

yez is that day

twilight-exabyte

I am so happy, I was so scared they would change the line. I had to refrain from laughing.

I’ve watched this like 10 times because I don’t understand

nameiscorey

im so sad when it ends everytime. i want more

cool-dad-deactivated20240526-de

notes are broken

lesbiancamie-deactivated2021033

did some bnha meme redraws

sprmint-bkgsoda

Just like I said. Illegal adoption.

https://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/immigrant-mom-loses-effort-regain-son-us-parents/story?id=16803067

stephanemiroux

Here are the thieves btw:

waluwadjet2-deactivated20180727

im actually physically ill

dontwantthenextcommanderiwantyou

Keep this post alive so that when CARLOS is old enough he’ll know these KIDNAPPERS stole him from his MOTHER!

dopeluminarydreamer-blog

Guatemalan mom: “Please help me my son was taken from me”

Those two assholes: “Lol finders keepers bitch lmao”

one-time-i-dreamt

Carlos was taken from his mom, Encarnacion Bail Romero after she was arrested during a work raid. Her words, “Nobody could help me because I don’t speak English,” are still resonating deeply within me. This child was kidnapped from a loving mother, and she went to hell and backwards trying to get him back, and a judge literally told her she had no rights to her own child.

https://twitter.com/evanchill/status/1010399759088193536

Completely unfit parents can get their children back like it’s nothing and this poor woman who loves her child and just wants him with her again cannot? How is this not human trafficking/kidnapping?

Also:

The judge said the biological mother had no rights to even see her child, according to the mother’s lawyer.

Asked if the Mosers would allow Bail Romero to see the child, the Mosers’ attorney, Joseph Hensley, said the couple was “not willing to comment on that at this time.” source

rock-fish-deactivated20201231

reminder that many children are funneled specifically to Christian families and communities for the same reasons they always have: destroy culture, stack votes, add bodies to communities that otherwise wouldn’t hold majorities. it is literal, actual trafficking.

trashmouse

This is a part of genocide. Removing the children from their parents, who generally desperately love and want to raise them, and placing them with white American families is a way to erase their culture from existence without the ugliness of directly killing children. But it’s still ugly, and it cares nothing for the actual welfare of the child.

scottishwobbly

when are y’all going to fucking tear down the detention centers?

brunhiddensmusings

anyone who supports this has no business calling themselves a christian, saying they have any moral authority, or pretending that nothing wrong happened any person with a functioning moral compass should be sickened by this