THE BEST KIND OF LOVE
I never thought acts of service would eventually be my love language. I always enjoyed hearing sweet words and receiving gifts so I always thought that was my love language not until I met my man.
That yearning for sweet words was the one that got me into the trap of falling in love with someone I never met for 9 years. He wasn‘t the type who would say „I love you“ everyday. He never even said that. He just always has the right words to say. My ex was the one who kept saying „I Love You forever“. Those words used to give me butterflies until they traumatized me, especially the word forever. I didn‘t want to believe in forever anymore after he cheated on me.
After getting over them, I thought I would never love again. I had self-doubt and even thought I wasn‘t capable of being loved. Maybe my mental issues were getting in the way or maybe I‘m simply ugly and I don‘t pass men‘s standards of beauty.
When I met my man, we didn‘t even talk to each other. We saw each other by chance after several months. The first day we went out together which was not even a date, proved how much of a gentleman he truly is. He picked me up at my place and brought me home too. He patiently taught me how to play pickleball not leaving my side the whole time. He also asked me to have brunch afterwards and he paid for that. Afterwards, we took the bus together. He didn‘t walk me home anymore because he had blisters but I felt he would if he didn‘t have blisters.
The next few times we went out, I was looped in with his group of friends just because of the girl who introduced us. Her boyfriend is friends with him. They started inviting me to group dinners. He would always save a spot for me right next to him and he would always help me with the food. At the end of the night, he would always walk me home.
When we finally got together, he kept inviting me to his place. He would always prepare dinner. He would buy something or cook something. It was always him who was takong the lead. He would play some romantic music while we were having dinner. He would randomly sing or dance with me in the living room. All these things gave me butterflies in my tummy.
When I overcame my shyness, I started cooking for him too. I‘m not even fond of cooking and I‘m so scared my cooking skills won‘t pass his standards. He was health conscious and he doesn‘t even fry anything. He rarely eats meat and so I have to carefully think of what to cook for him.
During the holidays, I knew how busy he was with work that he almost didn‘t have time to eat so I told him to let me stay at his place so that I can prepare his food. He eould always come home with food prepared and with everything ready with that 30 minute window between his work schedule. He would also have dinner at night once he comes home late. I also cleaned up his place for him. I never did these things for anyone before, not even for my family. I always relied on my Mom or my siblings unless I didn‘t have a choice and it would just be my Dad and me left at home. He thanked me for these things I did for him.
Ever since then, he would make sure I have food after my 4 hour online class. He would prepare food when he knows I‘m going to his place.
He isn‘t the kind of guy who says „I Love You“ or says sweet words. He also isn‘t the type of guy who showers me with gifts or plans anything. It can be frustrating and some of my friends pointed out that it shouldn‘t be that way. Of course I was disappointed at first too but getting to know him deeper makes me understand that he is different. He shows his love for me in a different kind of way. His actions and acts of service weigh more than any I Love Yous or gifts that I can have. I feel so much loved without those and because he‘s not the type who flowers me with sweet words or with gifts, I‘m the one who does that to him. I tell him I Love You every once in a while. I buy him something whenever I have a trip or whenever I go grocery shopping and see something he likes. I also surprise him and plan things for us. I do those things occasionally.
My man is the type of guy who would always pay for our meals yet he would allow me to pay if I say I want to pay. He would buy us groceries and would even let me pick the food I want when we do groceries together. He would let me choose the flavor of pizza. He would buy me wine even if we don’t have anything to celebrate. He would always hold my hand when we are outside. He would randomly hug and kiss me especially when I’m preparing our food. He would also take me on long walks just to appreciate nature and look at the stars and sky. He would take care of me whenever I am sick. He would stare at me and take my hands whenever I don’t feel well.
He has always been consistent since day 1 and that’s what I like about him. He gives me the best kind I of love through his acts of service and actions and that’s more than enough to make me feel so loved. He always gives me priority.
