haunted │ obi-wan kenobi x cody
Pairing: Obi-Wan Kenobi x Cody
Warning(s): There’s some sads here - a little angst, some trauma, a dissociative episode - but there’s also some fluff.
Summary: Even with Obi-Wan pressed against him in bed, nestled in the safety of his arms, Cody can’t help but be haunted by past events and how things could have been drastically different.
Word count: 2k
Read on AO3
Tags: @remadster come and get it, m’dude 💖💖
Parts written in italics are a flashback.
As Obi-Wan curled further into the warmth of Cody’s arms and tucked his auburn head under the other’s chin, Cody found the rasp of his beard against his bare chest oddly grounding and he reflected on how it used to be much harder to get the man currently nestled in his arms to relax. Between his duties as both General in the GAR and Jedi Council Member, Obi-Wan was prone to overworking and often stretched himself too thin. While the Commander did not approve of such behaviour, he had felt it was not his place to broach the topic with his General – until those actions put his life in danger while out on a scouting mission.
Obi-Wan had been exhausted – his connection to the Force hazy and difficult to focus on – and he’d been too slow in detecting the proximity mine, wandering into the blast radius before he could stop himself. Though Obi-Wan had been quick enough to shout a warning to his men and jump back slightly before the mine went off, the resulting explosion knocked the Jedi into a nearby rock face with enough force to kill a normal human and the sickening, crunching thud of Obi-Wan’s body hitting the solidity of the rock had haunted Cody’s dreams for weeks after. For a few long moments, as the squad hurried to where Obi-Wan lay while simultaneously sweeping the area for remaining threats, a lump of dread sat heavy in Cody’s gut; scared he would roll the General over and those once sparkling blue eyes would stare back at him, dull and lifeless.
The weight of panic lifted slightly when their medic confirmed he was alive – though in desperate need of serious medical attention. Cody turned back to his other men to find they had already set up a defensive perimetre under Waxer’s direction, who stood at attention as he awaited the Commander’s further orders.
“We get the General on a stretcher and two men will carry him out to the evac zone. You and Boil take point, keep an eye out for more mines. The rest take up formation around the General.”
The words were muffled in Cody’s ears – as though he was hearing it through water – but Waxer seemed to understand him fine, offering the Commander a quick nod before he stepped away. Cody raised his arm to speak into the comm on his vambrace when his surroundings blurred and cut to black. In the darkness, the sound of Obi-Wan’s laughter rang out; what was usually rich and full of a warmth that made Cody’s heart flutter now echoed hollowly back at him and his pulse thudded forcefully in his ears, threatening to drown out all else.
“-vived far worse, Cody. You heard the medics, few days in the tank and he’ll be right as Kaminoan rain.”
Waxer’s hand came down to pat him hard on the shoulder and Cody’s eyes snapped open. He was stood in front of a bacta-tank, watching as Obi-Wan floated peacefully in the blue liquid. The bacta gave off a slight tint that made Obi-Wan look even paler and, though he was far from it, Cody thought the Jedi looked frail and vulnerable. Hands shook as he clutched his helmet in front of him, grip so tight the leather of his gloves creaked in protest. On his other side, Boil gently bumped their elbows together with the thud of plastoid meeting plastoid – his cherished offering of support.
With more ribs broken than intact, Obi-Wan had suffered extensive internal bleeding that made the trip back to the Negotiator quite touch-and-go at times as the squads medic fought to control his dropping vital signs. Once aboard the ship and in the med bay, tensions eased marginally when the medical team were able to stop much of the hemorrhaging as they prepped the General for the bacta-tank. Cody could only watch and stare on dumbly, standing in the middle of the chaos like a lost Eopie.
There was a long, solemn pause as they stood in silence before, with a quiet clearing of his throat and a small nod of his head, the Commander dismissed his men and was left to stand alone at his self-imposed guard. The door slid shut behind them, blocking out the noise that came in from the medical facility and leaving just the mocking, monotonous sound of the machine scanning Obi-Wan’s vitals. The repetitive beeping faded into the background as the Commander watched his General, auburn hair floating in a halo around his head and features more relaxed than Cody had seen him, even during repose.
Cody’s gaze drifted down to Obi-Wan’s chest, bare of clothing but mottled in hideous bruises, the dark shades of blues and violets a stark contrast against the pallor of the man’s skin. The sight made Cody’s chest ache as remorse and guilt wrapped themselves around his ribcage like vines, tight and strangling. Look at your failure, hissed a voice in his head and so Cody did, unable to look away as his entire world homed in on the Jedi and the rest faded away into a muffled hum. His breastplate suddenly felt too small as his lungs heaved with the effort to pull in each breath, air whistling through his gritted teeth. The helmet slipped from his fingers and hit the floor with a dull thud as darkness swallowed the Commander once more.
Obi-Wan felt when Cody slipped as the warm bliss in the Force surrounding them soured with the panic that had begun to curl itself deep in Cody’s chest. The hands that had previously been brushing along his back in tender strokes had stilled and begun to tremble, the touch feather-light against Obi-Wan’s bare skin. Cody’s arms fell limply against the mattress when Obi-Wan lifted himself and shifted to a kneeling position at his side.
The darker-skinned man’s chest rose and fell in quick, shallow breaths and when Obi-Wan laid his hand against it, he could feel Cody’s heart pounding out a hard, rapid rhythm. His other hand came to rest on Cody’s shoulder as he leaned over to meet his eyes – they were fixed blankly at the ceiling, glazed over in a distant, thousand-yard stare. The gentle push to his shoulder went unnoticed.
“Cody,” the Jedi said, loud enough that is should have caught his attention, but there was no acknowledgement from the man.
Obi-Wan was careful not to shock Cody, wanting him to come back to himself slowly. His jaw ached with phantom pain when he remembered the time Cody took a swing at him when he had been startled out of an episode, the fight in his fight-or-flight response coming out full force. Moving silently, Obi-Wan climbed off the bed and padded into the refresher where he wet a cloth with cool water before he returned to his place beside Cody. With a gentle touch, Obi-Wan wiped the cloth over his Commander’s bare chest, hoping both the change of temperature and the sensation would help pull him back.
Cody had intended to keep things strictly professional, had not meant to let his emotions show when he was there as the Jedi woke, but something in him snapped when Obi-Wan smiled at him, soft and dopey from the painkillers still flowing through his system.
“Oh, there you are, darling,” Obi-Wan slurred his usual post-injury greeting once he saw Cody at his bedside. “so wonderful to see you.”
“Don’t,” Cody spat, as startled by his own tone as Obi-Wan looked. “not after that.”
“Cody, I- “
“We thought you were dead!” Obi-Wan’s eyes widened slightly when Cody’s voice cracked with emotion. “You hit that wall – the sound you made – and then you weren’t moving, and I thou- “
Cody stopped himself before he could say anything else that he would regret, the hand not holding his helmet clenched in a fist at his side. He turned away slightly, gaze focused out the viewport as he worked to steady his breathing and control the turmoil of emotion swirling in his gut.
Obi-Wan felt it all - of course he did, Cody was projecting it to him as loudly as the words he had just spoken - and it cleared the Jedi’s head immediately. Despite all the tension and flirting between them, many things had been left unsaid that were now laid bare on Cody’s part, hanging heavy in the silence between them. Before the silver-tongued ‘Negotiator’ himself could gather his thoughts into words, the Commander turned back to him with his face carefully arranged into a mask of neutrality.
“I apologize for my outburst, General. It was inappropriate and out of line, and it will not happen again.” Cody spoke in a flat, even tone and it felt cold compared to how Cody usually spoke to him. “I’ll leave you to rest.”
Cody made for the door but only got to the other side of the bed before Obi-Wan spoke and stopped him.
“Cody, wait please. Come here.”
When Cody looked back, Obi-Wan was holding out his hand with his palm up. He looked as he had in the bacta-tank, frail and small – vulnerable.
“Please, don’t go.”
He returned to him, he could never do anything else and they both knew as much, and set his helmet down on the foot of the bed. When he went to Obi-Wan’s side, he slid his gloved hand into the bare one presented to him. Obi-Wan’s other hand immediately came up to hold Cody’s one in both of his, cradling it as if it were something precious, his thumb rubbing in small circles against the leather on the back of his hand.
“It is I who should apologize, my dear Commander,” The Jedi said softly, and it made Cody’s heart flutter. “for making your task of protecting myself and your men harder with my negligence. I will take more care on our next mission and will make sure I’m rested before-hand.”
“That’s all I ask, General. It’s hard enough to keep you out of trouble with just the Seppies working against me.” A smile twitched at the corners of Cody’s mouth, fully forming when Obi-Wan matched it with his own grin.
After leaning forward, Obi-Wan pressed a kiss to the back of Cody’s hand, the leather warm and smooth against his lips. Cody was barely able to contain his splutter of embarrassment, adoration flowing through him at Obi-Wan’s blatant display of affection.
“Please then, my strong Commander, so brave and heroic, accept my most humble and sincere apologies for- “
“Alright, enough of that.”
It took some time for Cody to come back to himself but eventually his heartrate slowed and returned to normal, and the tremors in his hands stopped. Obi-Wan sat patiently beside him, alternating between passes of the cool, damp cloth and his bare hand across Cody’s chest and shoulders, hoping to help ground him with the touch. When Cody blinked a few times as he once again became aware of his surroundings, Obi-Wan reached over to rest his palm gently against the man’s cheek.
“Hello, dear one.” Obi-Wan smiled down at him, brushing his thumb along his cheekbone and over the scar around his eye. “Where did you go?”
“Obi-Wan,” Cody breathed softly as his hand came up to rest over the paler one against his cheek, turning his head to press a kiss to the Jedi’s palm. “nowhere, just unpleasant memories. I didn’t mean to worry you.”
“Are you alright?” Obi-Wan asked and Cody nodded. “Do you need anything?”
When Obi-Wan leaned across him to set the cloth on the bedside table, Cody lifted his arms and wrapped them around his torso, pulling Obi-Wan flush against him, chest to chest. The Jedi made a brief noise of mock indignance but let himself be rolled over onto his back, the Commander’s weight pinning him to the bed. Cody immediately ducked his head and began nuzzling into that auburn hair as his lips ghosted at the sensitive spot under Obi-Wan’s ear.
“Just this,” Came the quiet reply, huskily whispered. “just you.”
Obi-Wan’s hands came to rest on Cody’s shoulders, squeezing firmly and massaging the broad expanse until tense muscles eased. When Cody sagged even further into Obi-Wan, one of those hands slid up to rest at the back of his neck, fingers threaded into his short, dark hair while the other stroked in gentle movements over his back; much like Cody had previously been doing to him, their roles and positions now reversed.
“I’m here, dear one, I’m with you.”
