My songs know what you did in the dark

Αnαsταsία Αλέxαnder

[gigeya]

Sweet dreams

[gigeya]

You will be mine

[gigeya]

... but I’m still with you

[gigeya]

[nautigirlblues-blog]

[gigeya]

So do I . . .

[boy-so-pale]

[afran444]

To whoever falls in love with me, I promise to fall so insanely hard for you. I promise to love you top to bottom, inside and out. I promise listen to you and care for you greater than anyone ever has. I promise to be the shoulder you cry on and the person to make you laugh. I promise to lift you up on days you feel you can’t get out of bed. And if you still can’t get out of bed I will lay with you. I promise to do everything in my power to make sure you don’t ever doubt my love for you. I just ask for a few things in return. Be patient with me. I’m a little hard to handle sometimes and I apologize in advance. Sometimes I just get sad and I don’t know why. Just hold me and tell me you love me, I’ll come back around I promise. I can be needy so please don’t leave me hanging for hours because I’ll wonder if I said or did anything wrong. Just let me know you’ll be busy and I’ll be perfectly okay. I get anxious. A lot. A majority of the time I don’t know why so please understand that. Listen to me. If you show me you listen I swear it’ll only make me fall for you even more. I’m not the easiest person to be with but I love harder than anyone I’ve ever come across.

I promise you won’t regret falling for me just like I won’t regret falling for you (March 30th 10:11pm)

[gigeya]

"..and as I was crying my eyes out she walked in the room and I could feel her disappointment. It was in the air. I stopped moaning and looked at her as tears were still rolling down my eyes. This was the first time I saw her in a different way. It was for a second, just for a moment. But here she was. She was tall and skinny, nothing special. Nothing. She was so ordinary that it made me sick. But there was something different.. She looked like a child, even though, she was so grown up. She was wise and smart. I understood why everyone liked her.. for her. And tears came back almost like a tsunami. She was saying something, she was trying to comfort me.. But I couldn't hear her at all. She was my best friend among my worst enemies. My thoughts were so loud. I was thinking and thinking, and thinking. It just hit me at this moment. How different we were. I was this pretty feline with a dark soul of a miserable child. And she was a woman with a baby face, this naive and almost unflattering face. Beauty was always my salvation. But this time it didn't work. He wanted nothing to do with me.. The first thing I heard from her was: -- Oh, baby. Are you comin' back on it again? Is he even worth your tears? I swear it made me so angry, I was gonna yell at her face but I physically couldn't. So I just whispered instead: -- You won't ever understand. I was angry and ungrateful, but she couldn't help and it was making me more mad.. I don't remember exactly what happened then but she started yelling at me and we started a fight and I was still crying. I don't remember anything she was saying. But before she left she said something that is still on my mind. I remember it so vividly still: -- You know what the fvck is your problem? You can't always rely on your beauty you have to have something inside. And if you're so depressed and unhappy you can fvcking go find a therapist because no one will ever take your pain away. Go help yourself! The fvck do you want from others? You make other people unhappy because it hurts to watch you in pain! And it hurts to understand that we can not help you. I don't need that shlt in my life. I really care for you but boys and parties are not gonna make you happy. So please stop being such a little bltch because the only problem you have with this guy is that he doesn't want you like everyone else does. And this is fvcking hilarious you can't please everyone." She was so right. But I don't know if there's a point anymore. It's been a year and nothing's changed. My therapist is like a friend that I have to pay to. And he gave up on me too. I always make bad decisions. I have bad intentions. I have bad habits. I'm a bad influence. And for this all I have just bad solutions. I don't know what pushes me. But I keep going. I know one day everything's going to be alright. It HAS to be.

[gigeya]

I’m not a good one. Not good at all. I’m not even the tiniest bit of kindness and warmth. I’m cold, literally. In all senses. Not just emotionally, but physically. Everyone who touches me feels this freezing cold. I destroy everything around me, but so desperately looking for warmth and someone who warm me.

[covetedtouch]

i just want a boy who touches me distractedly

like sitting watching a movie and he just kinds of drags his fingers over your skin while watching and he doesn’t have a motive he’s not trying to tickle you or be sexual with you he’s just touching your skin and feeling the shape of your bones under that skin like it’s physically comforting for him to know that you’re there right under his fingertips im so

[gigeya]

I wanna be sun, that kisses your face every morning, as you laying so innocent in your bed. I wanna be cigarette, that you smoke, since your lips touch it with such tenderness. I wanna be blanket, that covers your body, as you're crying in your bed alone again. I wanna be road from work to home, so your feet could touch me everyday. I wanna be drink, that you're having alone on a Friday night, because you're tired of your friends. I wanna be radio in your car, so I could play songs you love to sing and the ones that touch you. I wanna be drug, that you shoot every morning, so I could be the only thing that takes your pain away. I wanna be walls in your room, so I could listen to your beautiful voice and you'd have someone to talk to. I wanna be star, that falls from night sky, so I could make your wishes come true. I wanna be friend, so I could embrace you. I wanna be lover, so I could take care of you. Just let me love you, oh..

[gigeya]

No, I don't want you to cry me a river. You should cry me a fucking ocean. . . . . . #wildlife #explore #everyday #travel #young #youngandfree #inspo #inspire #photo #photography #pretty #aesthetic #annyalexdaily #style #styleblogger #fashion #lifestyle #lifestyleblogger #clothes #clothing #beauty #minimalism #ocean #beach (at Miami Beach, Florida)

[gigeya]

I remember that day. He was truly one of the best days of my life. When I first admitted to myself that I love you. No matter what you don't like me back. . . . . . #wildlife #explore #everyday #travel #young #youngandfree #inspo #inspire #photo #photography #aesthetic #accessory #accessories #annyalexdaily #style #styleblogger #darlingboy #fashion #tattoostyle #artbody #lifestyle #lifestyleblogger #clothes #clothing #touching #couple #girlandboy #minimalism (at Miami, Florida)

[gigeya]

I'm good I'm good I'm great Know it's been a while, now I'm mixing up the drink I just need a girl who gon' really understand I just need a girl who gon' really understand And I seen her get richer on the pole I've seen her, I knew she had to know I've seen her take down the tequila Down by the liter, I knew I had to meet her Ooh, she mine, ooh girl, bump and grind Ooh, she mine, ooh girl, bump a line Angelina, lips like Angelina Like Selena, ass shaped like Selena . . . . . #quotes #wild #wildlife #explore #everyday #travel #young #youngandfree #inspo #inspire #photo #pretty #accessory #aesthetic #accessories #annyalexdaily #style #styleblogger #fashion #lifestyle #lifestyleblogger #clothes #clothing #beauty #minimalism #theweeknd #partymonster (at Bienville St)

[badxbaby]

[gigeya]

WANT

[gigeya]

My life became a typical movie from 90's. I'm such a dumb blonde, I'm mean and clueless. They call me poison ivy. And I don't mind, this is exactly how I feel. I'm poisoning their lives with my existence. They either wish they had me or never met me. They don't fvcking know me but everyone thinks it's okay to tell me how to 'make my life better'. That's fvcked up in many ways. I make everyone believe I'm having fun, I make them believe I'm so happy. I'm walking around in short dresses making everyone want me. Just so I can feel better about myself, they never get me. Never. I'm happy they don't see me looking in the mirror adoring what I see. I'm happy they don't see me looking in the mirror hating what I see. Tell me it's okay to feel this way. Someone tell me it's okay to be the way I am. Because I don't even know anymore. Hello, hi, I'm Alison and I haven't been high or drunk for 3 days. Are you proud of me? Did I succeed? You know, they say 'fake it till you make it'. Bullshlt. I'm tired of faking it. I always pretend. I pretend to be someone. And I'm still no one. I feel like soon I'll forget how to be real, I'll forget how to stop pretending. Do you think I'm arrogant too? I hope no, because I'm not, it's just.. My heart's broken and no one could fix this. Funny, huh? Because I've never ever been in love. I don't know what love is, I've never felt it. I don't know if I'm even able to love. Yes, I admired quite a few men, I adored them, but then those feelings just went away too. I didn't love them, they told me they love me but then they hurt me, should I believe their words? I thought if you love someone you would never let them ache. Probably, I'm wrong again. I write this down so I can ease the weight on my back, so it's a little bit easier to breathe. I write it down just to empty my head. I don't do this for attention. I don't want a fvcking pity. I never did. . . . . . #wild #wildlife #explore #everyday #running #travel #young #youngandfree #inspo #inspire #pretty #photography #accessory #aesthetic #accessories #annyalexdaily #style #styleblogger #smoking #smokinggirl #grunge #lifestyle #lifestyleblogger #city #beauty #minimalism (at Manchester, United Kingdom)

[linoivrevilo-deactivated2018020]

[gigeya]

Cutie two ever ♥️my Queen