Lesson of the day if you didn’t already know it: Most men will compliment you because they want their ego inflated by your recognition of their superiority.
Yesterday at work a customer called me beautiful twice and I didn’t say anything. He then proceeded to say “you’re welcome,” to which I replied “I don’t have to say thank you.” His face was pure rage. How dare I don’t acknowledge and be flattered by his comment? At the end of his transaction, I told him: “Please refrain from such comment next time; I’m just trying to do my job.” He didn’t say anything but his face showed more than any word he could have said. Not even ten minutes later he came back and returned what he had purchased because of my customer service, saying he had paid me a compliment and I gave him an attitude.
My “attitude”? Not taking his compliment and being amused by it, not showing that I need his approval to feel beautiful nor being thankful that he told me so.
But here’s the catch: NOTHING gives you the right to say ANYTHING to a complete stranger. It’s one thing if you tell me you like my hair or my outfit is nice. Anything personal beyond that is unacceptable and WON’T be tolerated.
I don’t have to say thank you; I don’t have to acknowledge your comment to inflate your ego; I don’t have to stay quiet and take it; I don’t have to let you feel superior and accept your creepiness. If you make me uncomfortable by anything you say, you will be shut down.
It is so engraved in the minds of most men that they can say anything to women and not only get away with it but also be validated, that when a woman doesn’t react the way they want her to, they get mad and show their true intentions weren’t to actually compliment her, but to mark their superiority. Do you want an example? There are experiments online from women who said “thank you,” or “I know” to men who had called them pretty, etc. and these same men completely turned on them and called them names. If you prefer a closer-to-home experience, come spend a day with me at my job and there’ll be plenty of first hand examples for you.
These men need to be taken down; they need to learn it is NOT ok to treat women like that. If you are a man and you do this, you need to STOP and learn NOW how to treat women better. If you see someone do something like it and stay quiet, you’re also part of the problem. As long as people are compliant, nothing will change. If you go through this: SPEAK UP! You have the right to be treated like a human being and not an object.
Fuck this stupid misogyny!
kaledo-art
germansingergirl
jbbartram-illu
snowghoul
blakekathryn
titsay
annaxmalina
