( j o k e r )

Flight Lieutenant on the SSV Normandy. This is an indie rp blog for Joker from the Mass Effect Trilogy.

[glasspilot]

jacksubjectzero answered your post: Hey guys, remember when I existed?

You found your way out of the other OTHER dimension!?

By some sort of fucking magic, yes. Though it took me like six times to get my log-in properly.

[glasspilot]

Hey guys, remember when I existed?

[glasspilot]

[The recorded transmission flickers to life] "Hey Jeff-yyyyy! How're you? Dad says you're still away flying that cool ship and all, but when're you gonna come home to Tiptree? I know YOU think your job is exciting, but just you wait until I tell you all about what Marshall did in school the other day. Oop! Gotta go, love ya, bro! Keep in touch. Remember to visit us sometime, okay?"

Jeff watches the screen as the visual of audio waves accompanies his sister's voice. It's the last message he's received from her, and the last he'll ever receive. It was only weeks before that he'd heard about the Reaper forces making it to Tiptree, his home planet... He'd tried to reach sister and father at every chance he got since, but things looked grim. He doesn't want to believe anything had happened to her, and he's holding out hope that at least she had made it to the salarian refugee colonies like Liara had said, but... Hope was a rare thing in times like these. It looked bleak.Knowing this could very well be the last time he ever hearshis sister's voice... It's hard not to get emotional over. But he sits there, stoic as he looks onward ahead of him. His eyes feel sticky as he blinks.

Slowly, he reaches out to replay the message, his "Gunny's"voice in his ear piece the only sound in the cockpit that late,other than the hum of the ship.

[glasspilot]

[syntheticplatform]

“Compiling recent extranet search results, then." It only took her a moment to access the logs, her eyes narrowing to mimic what she had observed as an annoyed expression. "Jeff," she began, turning back to the pilot. "You failed to mention that the most recent extranet activity has come from your terminal, here in the cockpit. You also did not tell me that you had been viewing explicit content. Would you like me to read aloud your most recent searches?”

[glasspilot]

❝------Shit! No, no, no no no... er, crap. Totally forgot about    that. D---don----don't read it. Can you just, like, I dunno, wipe    that from your memory data banks or...whatever?❞ The down-    side to having a girlfriend who didn't exactly understand the     concept of "privacy". ❝Just...just...ignore all of that. ...Please.❞

[codenamearchangel]

“Right." Ah, perfect opportunity to change the subject. “How’s that working out for you, Joker? First you hated EDI and did whatever you could to mess with her, then you gave her full access to things that Cerberus didn’t want her to have access to, and now you’re…ogling her. Was it the body that changed your mind, or did you secretly like her this whole time but just pretended you didn’t?”

[glasspilot]

Fortunately for Garrus, the conversation is finally turned, and Jeff scratches his bearded chin. ❝Hey, I'm not that shallow. It's just...y'know. She starts growing on you, and then you start to wonder if you've developed some abnormal fetish, because you're attracted to a voice attached to a blue hol- ogram. And then, one day, she gets a smokin' hot, entirely anatomically correct robot body and it's like, okay, not so weird. I mean, she's a person, so it's not weird...even if I could potentially break a bone just from a little over-the- clothes action.❞

[apothexsis-deactivated20150219]

glasspilot

[apothexsis-deactivated20150219]

        “Joker. I assume everything is alright          up here? Though I should check up          on you and add a few planets we          have to scan for lost artefacts. People          keep requesting us on the Citadel.”

[glasspilot]

❝Lay it on me, Boss. I'll take anything I can get right now,    or I might just die of boredom from the lack of...anything    happening. Even if it's just monotonous scanning. It's like    somebody died or something. ----I mean. I know. Plenty of    people have, but that's not the point. It can't hurt to ask for    a little excitement. Even if it's just like, radiation fields or    something. Y'know?❞

[imperatorvictus-blog]

    “No, but I doubt she’d have expected to hear it in the middle of a diplomatic negotiation with the Primarch, no matter how unorthodox my reputation.  I piss people off, but apparently I do it in ways that they’ve come to expect.” His mandibles flare at the thought  of the Dalatrass’ reaction. “…That’s one way to put it,” he agrees carefully, “And it’s just as well that I am not.  Still, it was a close call.  You owe me for not running to the Commander with this, Moreau.”

     Oh yes, not even the Primarch was above ribbing.  For once he felt like he was among his own men again.  Frustrations aside, he had Joker to thank for that.

[glasspilot]

Jeff was really starting to like this guy. Out of all the normally tight-arsed turians he'd met, it didn't seem the primarch was actually that bad. Almost like Garrus not-bad, with maybe less awkward elusiveness. It was kind of refreshing to see him take the prank so well. ❝Hey, I got a good way to make it up to you, Primarch. You and me can team up against Vakarian with an even better prank, turian-style. What do you say? ---Come on, I know you've got a playful side to you somewhere in there.❞

[dumbluckshepard-moved]

"Fine with me. The imagery isn’t exactly pleasant when you think about the word itself. Don’t think about it too hard." He’s totally gonna think about it and that’s got William smirking.

[glasspilot]

❝---Okay, yeah, officially calling this 'the bridge', I don't    even care what anyone says.❞

[theroguesniper]

He gives Joker an unimpressed look, head tilted slightly as one of his brow plates arches. “Yeah, well, this was last year. Before anything had even happened with Shepard. I still have no idea what gave us away. Hellishly observant.”

[glasspilot]

❝Y'know, you're a lot more obvious than you think, Vakarian.❞

[japaneserobinhood]

"You always gloat over your successes, I want to gloat over mine! Not many people can say they took a gunship down on foot!"

[glasspilot]

❝Yeah, I guess that's cool and all. Not exactly saving the entire crew    multiple times by weaving through asteroid fields and escaping col-    lector ships cool, but, you know, you're on your way, Kid.❞

[thelastshepard]

"I’m doing that right now. Besides, it doesn’t have a tub. Nice to know you’ve never snooped Inc my room. Traynor is using it. I can’t exactly join her."

[glasspilot]

❝Uhh, how come she gets to use your shower and the    rest of us don't? More importantly, me? Your favorite    pilot and source of witty banter?❞

[japaneserobinhood]

"What? You told me you liked the heist mission.”

[glasspilot]

❝Yeah, because it was a change of pace. Hell, I'll take about     anything I can get these days. But I have my limits, Kasumi.❞

[glasspilot]

thelastshepard replied to your post: open ❝Ugh—-what? C’mon, I don’t nee...

"Then perhaps you shouldn’t be in the showers?"

❝Yeah, well, I can't spend all day in the cockpit, can I? Wear    a towel or something. ----And why are you down here, anyway?    Is your fancy, I'm-commander-so-I-get-a-special-shower-with-mult-    iple-jets tub broken or something?❞

[glasspilot]

open

❝Ugh---what? C'mon, I don't need to see that.❞

[salvatoraem]

        ——   “Right…"             [she clears her throat again]                   “The engineers were wondering             if you had noticed anything                    they might need to look into.”    ——   

[glasspilot]

❝Y'know, actually, now that you mention it, I was totally noticing    some drag coming from the starboard propulsion jets. Hell, I'll    actually comm them about that before I forget... ---I knew she    was gonna have problems sooner or later. You don't just get    a brand new-and-improved craft without some kind of stupid    issue to go along with it...❞

[dumbluckshepard-moved]

"Hey, Joker. I assume everything’s going well up here?"

[glasspilot]

❝Yep, all good in the cockpit, Boss. ...God, "cockpit". I hate     that term. Petition to call this the bridge from now on.     More Star Trek, less innuendo. Win/win, in my opinion.❞