very long train of thought post below..
Our identity has been really fluid lately. We are changing, which makes sense given that a prior co-host is active again. As host, my identity is heavily influenced by which alters are around, but I always have my own sense of self to ground in.
But, lately, that is changing as well. I feel different. Still me, but some core pieces of my identity feel more..distant? Like the puzzle pieces of my existence are being rearranged into a new image.
It doesn't scare me. I'm used to the tides of our existence rising and falling, reshaping the sands of our collective existence in new and old ways.
But, it's interesting to be more aware of it this time. To feel the changes slowly taking shape. To notice little features of who I am morphing into something new.
I think that may be why we have latched onto the moth identity. Moths are insects that change form. They only do it once, but still...it resonates.
But, we also have the glitched identity. We often view DID as a glitch. A System Error, if you will. Dissociation, derealization, depersonalization, time warping..it all feels like a glitch or series of glitches. We used to apply glitch effects to all our favorite selfies and images. Slight distortions around the edges.
I'm losing the plot of this post.
The point is, you, dear viewer of this little speck in the network, are going to see changes over time. I wish we could be stationary. I know people find comfort in things that are grounded and familiar. We are not that. Our existence is not a comforting one to most people. We are a walking Error. A reminder that existence is not bound to one perspective or identity.
Things will change, and I hope that those of you who notice won't mind too much.
Thank you for reading if you did.
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