[thegreatgillygoo]

Based on a whisper I saw on Pinterest (many thanks to the reblogger who helped me find the link and the op who is the true visionary 🥹):

[glittertattoosnotsogoodname]

Yeeees! Loook at this chair, its perfect for them with post reveal pre relationship<3

[beebox-illustrations]

The next weeks Posts will be a Ride down last years obessions lane!

So I watched and then read spyxfamily which was a blast ! Love the characters and the relationships between them ✨✨ so naturally I had to draw them :)

Some fans out there ?

Have a fantastic week ✨♥️🐝

[yihsch]

Mission 2: The Date (part 5)

[Start] [Part 4] <- -> [Part 6]

What? Idiot 1 and idiot 2 posed no challenge for elite operatives???

@witless-winion1 @im-not-a-porno @cyberghoulxxo @circuswitch @xtilminkj-re @y2kinnow @readerreadings02 @godsfavouriteamoebe @a-sociopath-do-your-research @chocolate-addicted @zarastrawberry

[doodleandcry]

in which anya learns about yearning

[shrewwd]

muehehehe its finally done!!! its a bit overdramatic shoujo manga core but eh who cares? i love shoujo!!!

it can take place whenever honestly but i see this little moment happening post chapter 120

[o0kawaii0o]

The Forgers!

[smolhours]

SPYxFAMILY (CH. 137-138)

// spoilers below

while nightfall has appeared here and there—often with twilight at the hospital or with WISE at their base—it's been some time since she was in focus in an arc. about 50 chapters if we count from the wheeler arc, and almost a hundred since the arc she was introduced in. and maybe because of that, these two recent chapters feel like a reintroduction of sorts, reminding us not only of nightfall's abilities as a spy, but also of her core traits: her ruthlessness and her hidden dere tendencies her love for twilight, to name a few.

in a way, these chapters also reference the campbelldon tennis arc since those were the only other notable times nightfall directly interacted with yor and anya. yor even refers to her as the "tennis lady," while anya's actively rejecting the idea of nightfall as her mother just as she had been when she first met her.

given these, the current arc feels primed to have some character development for nightfall, especially with reference to one of her major roles as a character, which is as a foil to/self-proclaimed rival of yor. and it can be argued that this scene implies it:

as pointed out by @yumeka-sxf, there's this bit in the dialogue of nightfall's internal declaration of love for twilight in ch. 138 where she says "pride" but the meaning of the kanji used is actually "love," which nightfall says in comparison with yor's "carefree kindness." my take on this is that this moment reflects the fundamental difference between yor's and nightfall's love for twilight. both women want to support him and want him to achieve his goals. but where yor shows her love through her kindness, nightfall shows her love through her usefulness, her merit. and since her relationship with twilight only exists in the context of spyhood, this manifests in her pride as a spy, in her continually striving to prove that she is the best and is capable of standing by his side, because the only way she can support someone who is the best is to herself be the best, too.

this importance of merit is why she comments specifically on yor's limitations in the wife role. like, yes, she is probably jealous of yor's position and proximity to twilight and wants to oust yor, but i think it's also because yor's position is the one she feels would be the best way to be useful to twilight, and so would be the best way for her to express her love for him. so if yor is not useful to him, she is unfit for the role and cannot compare to nightfall, whose merits are what make her worthy to be with twilight.

and, let me be clear, i don't think these mean that nightfall is a bad person. being skilled and ruthlessly pragmatic are necessary in her line of work, and these qualities are only compounded by her love for twilight. in another story (maybe also this story, in some way), nightfall's mentality would be considered noble. admirable, even. but since SXF puts a lot of value on healing from past traumas, on recognizing one's value as a person beyond just their usefulness, it makes sense why we'd feel more negatively for someone like nightfall, whose characterization and priorities are less aligned with these themes, compared to someone like yor. again, not an indication of morality or anything, just a difference in perspective!

nightfall saying, "even if it costs agent twilight his life, i will make his dream come true" also feels telling about the difference between nightfall and yor regading their feelings for twilight. while it plays into the difference explained earlier where yor places importance on being kind and nightfall on being useful, it also reflects how yor loves him to his healing and nightfall loves him to his ruin. because, as someone who does her best not to let emotions sway her, nightfall will push him to make the hard decisions and to do the difficult things if the situation requires it, even if said pushing would only harm or hurt him more. and i believe this goes both ways, because based on the events in the wheeler arc, i think nightfall would work even harder to her own ruin to avenge twilight if he did die. it makes me wonder if she even loves him still or if she has learned to satisfy herself with the act of loving him that he himself has become irrelevant. almost as if she loves the idea of him more than the reality of who he is. because even in her fantasies, the twilight we see feels so disconnected to the character we know, which strikingly contrasts yor's perception of loid (at least when she's not actively spiralling).

if anything, i think she is a tragic character because of how restricted she is by her circumstances. there are probably other moments in the story that prove this, but the one sticking to me most right now is the fact that she words it as "the luxury […] of carefree kindness." if endo-sensei wanted to make her seem evil, nightfall would have phrased it more negatively, like "i cannot be weak like her" or "i cannot be so easily moved by pity" or whatever other variations. instead, he has her recognize it as kindness and even call it a luxury. some may argue that she's being sarcastic, but i think the phrasing implies that she would've wanted to be kind, it's just that she couldn't. because being a good spy in the way that her beloved mentor has taught her is more important than giving in to an impulse that would benefit her alone and would not serve to further their mission.

and speaking of those consequences: while both nightfall and twilight have to live with the restrictions of spyhood, i feel like nightfall has it worse because unlike twilight, her cover doesn't allow her to create deep emotional bonds with the person she cares about. as much as twilight might not openly admit to caring for his family, he quite clearly does care about them, and being loid forger allows him to have close emotional relationships with these people he cares about since it is only natural that loid, as a husband and father, has such relationships with his wife and daughter. on the other hand, nightfall can't do the same through fiona, who has no business having the deep emotional relationship nightfall would like with twilight through his dr. forger persona. and given that she's set up as this rival for yor, it almost feels unfair to compare them. nightfall cannot afford to know twilight outside of the context they are in, no matter how much she may want to, unlike yor, whose relationship with loid exists in a context that would actually promote it.

and speaking of her beloved mentor: with every point for nightfall mentioned, we can see so much of twilight's influence peeking through. he is someone who places much value on his own merits and usefulness, and he has shown similar self-destructive tendencies, even though he reminds nightfall to be the opposite (lol what a hypocrite). and one would think that these similarities would endear nightfall to twilight, but they don't. at least, not in a way that nightfall would like. which is also tragic because it's likely that she learned this mindset from him, not realizing that his values are the exact opposite, that he would never ask anyone to treat themselves the way he treats himself. and so the more she tries to be like him, the more she reveals that she doesn't truly know or understand him.

interestingly, twilight has similar line to "the luxury of [...] carefree kindness" in ch. 1 where he goes "hopes of marriage? the joys of an ordinary life?" rather than feel demeaning, the line hints at bitterness because he perceives marriage as something to hope for, that an ordinary life is something to find joy in, but he couldn't. because spy things. but while it's a similarity between the two, i don't think this is one nightfall is aware of or is something she learned from him. after all, twilight had been extremely good until now at keeping his true feelings under wraps. instead, i think this is a similarity borne out of shared circumstances, i.e., the consequences of being a spy.

since yor herself is physically present in the chapter, i really really reaaaaaally hope she plays a big part in it, at least where nightfall is concerned. my ideal scenario is that yor is the one who bumps into donovan and her "carefree kindness" is what causes it! and then maybe one of them recognizes the other's relationship with melinda, maybe yor ends up feeling intimidated since she remembers that donovan is supposedly this important person, and maybe nightfall uses their conversation as an excuse to get close and be present since it wouldn't at all be unnatural for fiona, loid forger's colleague, to know and interact with yor, loid forger's wife. and as they walk back, yor could say she's grateful to fiona for helping her out of the conversation, and instead of judging her on her lack of ability, this kindness from yor touches her somewhat, not that she'll let that show or anything. and by the time they return to twilight's room, she sees that same kindness touch him, see that "hint of real emotion" shine through again, and it gives her pause. perhaps it makes her rethink things, if only for a little bit. and this whole scenario would lead to (a) nightfall's begrudging acceptance of yor's value to the mission (which btw does not necessarily mean she is stepping back. maybe this pushes her on, maybe this leads to her having some level of respect for yor, or whatever else) and (b) twilight's continued downward spiral over whether yor is an asset or an obstacle to the mission lol (because of all the people she could connect with, she runs into donovan desmond of all people???)

to end this, i want to add that while i do think nightfall's character has mostly just been expounded on during her appearances, it's not like she hasn't grown or changed, even if it's just a little bit (most apparent in short mission 15 imo!). her first instinct being to call for twilight here feels like something an earlier nightfall wouldn't have done, specifically the version of her from the campbelldon tennis arc. maybe this was her respecting twilight's lead (after all, this is explicitly his mission) instead of using this as an opportunity to impress him like she did back then. maybe this was her following handler's orders to not engage with donovan on her own and to not take unnecessary risks, unlike before when handler told her not to meddle with the forgers and yet she did so anyway. maybe this was her acknowledging that she couldn't do this on her own, unlike how she tried to take on all those tennis matches by herself. whatever the case may be, i'd like to think that there's something there, even if it's overshadowed by the fact that she's making a very sick man exert himself more than he should be, but again… well, i think you have an idea of how i feel about that by now **gestures to the rest of the post** 😅

though i suppose we'll learn more once the new chapter comes ^^

[blvck-minou]

No one knows the trouble Honey

[beannoss]

I'm deeply unsatisfied with Endo handling Yor to not remember Chad Curtis to the point of almost wanting to drop the series after this arc and only consume fanwork. I might pick up the manga again when the series is over. I haven't decided if I'll drop it or not, but I am not honestly able to enjoy Endo's writing like I used to. I was wondering if you had any thoughts or different perspective than me, because I can only really see it as flanderization.

I think there's a difference between (a) portraying a character who is ignorant because they've been sheltered, or groomed the way Yor has and (b) treating them like an idiot. It also feels like he is denying her growth in questioning her surroundings to an absurd extent.

For Yor, whose principal asset is being protective towards her loved ones, I just can't see her being ditsy to the point of forgetting someone who threatened her husband and brother's safety in broad daylight. For someone who was scared enough of the SSS to the point that she actually entered a fake-marriage, I also can't this as doing justice to her, to not have her even question it or why he is near Yuri, even as fishing buddies. It also feels like a easy way to not hold Twilight accountable for his actions, to have the victim of his actions in this scenario just NOT remember. That he even gets to tranquilize her and gets off scot-free for this, when the reason he had to resort to that because he dressed up as that SSS officer and intimidate her in the first place. I don't feel like being hospitalized really makes me feel bad for him either. What would make me feel satisfied is actually being held accountable for the way he has manipulated Yor for his own cover. Hesitation in tranquilizing her. Actually demonstrating guilt and turmoil or understanding just how dirty he actually did Yor in this whole situation, from posing as Chad, to the party and his thought process after. I feel like he got off lightly as fuck, as Yor not remembering feels like a slap in the face to her character. I've felt like this with how Endo treats Yor's character in the past and currently, where her ignorance is portrayed in a way that doesn't make even make sense for her personality traits and feels almost belittling towards her. He just keeps not addressing serious situations with her or turning them into comedic moments and I'm kind of sick of it. Sorry for going off a rant. I'm asking you because you've actually written my favorite depiction of Yor's pov maybe ever. I consume a lot of fics lol, but rereading the way you've taken Yor's feelings seriously in the situations you've written, be it anger, suspicion, sadness, joy, compassion, heartbreak is such a de-stressor from following canon these days. I deeply treasure your work because I feel like it does Yor justice in a way I don't see anywhere else. Thanks for your awesome work and hope you have a good day!

Hi Anon,

So, right off the bat! Anyone is entitled to stop doing something for any reason at any time, and to that point (!) it’s much better to do that if the something-in-question is a hobby that’s no longer fun for you, than to keep doing it while coming to resent a thing you once loved. If you choose to no longer follow SxF because it’s just not enjoyable to you any longer, for whatever it’s worth, I respect that decision a great deal. It’s a choice with a lot of integrity: life’s too short to spend time with stuff that just makes you mad or otherwise upset when you’re able to choose to do otherwise. And as you so rightly note, you can always return to it later. It’s disappointing and painful to fall out of love with something once held close, and I would also grieve were I in your shoes (and have done, for other fandoms.) It’s unfortunate that we can love the pieces but not always enjoy the case they come in, and I’m sorry that’s your experience of SxF at the moment.

For me, and I say this kindly, I do feel differently, and I differ in my read of things as well… To be clear, I do understand functionally what you’re saying, and I think I understand the analytical track taken to get there. However I come from another perspective: I actually think Yor’s characterisation is coherent in-narrative and so don’t think the SSS house party arc was disrespectful to her; I also don’t really think Twilight needs to be made to repent on bloodied knees for… anything he’s done to this point, in-story; and I don’t think Endo disrespects any of his characters, I believe he is both thorough in exploring them and compassionate with them in a way that, for me, makes being a fan of SxF a rare joy. SxF does still of course use comedy as the string through and on which everything is connected; for me that doesn’t detract from the other parts of it (nor diminish its moments of seriousness) but that absolutely does not mean it has to work for you. And also to be clear, I by no means intend to imply that Endo and SxF itself are therefore perfect, but on these topics, I don’t have complaints. 

For all that, I’m not going to try to persuade you out of your position, Anon, I’m just going to answer your points since you’ve asked for my opinion, and alas, my weakness is being asked my opinion <3

I’m going to start with a couple of things that I think may explicate where a couple of differences begin. 

I’d personally gently push back for instance, that I don’t think Yor’s ‘principle asset’ is being protective of her loved ones… That’s what she thinks of herself, how she ranks her own utility, that it’s one of the only (she may think the only) things she can do. But her overall arc is partially about how she isn’t just that one facet of herself. She is innumerable other things; she is a whole person. Curious, determined, impulsive, anxious, passionate, thoughtful, adventurous, scatterbrained, loyal, creative, trusting, disciplined, sweet, forgetful, resourceful, adaptive, considerate, loving, kind… her principle asset is her heart. Which she is learning, bit by bit, and which was also showcased through these chapters.

And fwiw, I also don’t actually think Yor was groomed, no more than Twilight was anyway, and certainly far less than Yuri is currently facing… Or at least, unless we’re talking about the more conventional, broad meaning of the term, as in, trained for her role (as, idk, a politician might be.) Assuming the definition for abhorrent child abuse though, I know that’s a common fanon, and we certainly won’t know until we know (!) but Yor has demonstrated heaps of free choice and critical thinking throughout the series, including her own explanation and justifications for her work that are not rote but are deeply personal, and her own explicitly stated and well developed morality, practicing her personal moral compass, with moral clarity. There’s also no indication that she couldn’t retire from Garden if she wanted to, or that she’s been coerced or blackmailed or otherwise manipulated into staying (likewise, McMahon references retirement with no qualms but his own personal ones.) The likelier course in my view is that it was the only avenue of help available to her when she was desperate, and the only way the underworld folk she met were able to help at the time (eg: in wartime, Garden may not have had the money/resources to simply give, but they could pay an employee.) 

One of the things played with in SxF is a complicated morality; the underworld consequently reflects both ‘good’ and ‘bad,’ is not simply an unalloyed bad, and ultimately imo SxF is more interested in 1. a person in their whole, and 2. the reasons they made choices, rather than in vilifying or vindicating a specific choice or action in isolation. Which to me, is also why Garden is likely to fall on the side of helpful for Yor, rather than harmful, in the end. Ideal? Absolutely not. But, and I say this gently, so what…? Life is full of many such complications, people doing their best with what they have, and for me, it’s refreshing to see that explored in SxF.

I don’t mean to pick on these points, but I think they may be crucial in explaining my difference in perspective in approaching Yor in canon.

So with that baseline established (!) to the first point, with Yor and Chadwick… I don’t think it’s unbelievable that Yor may not remember Chadwick (not yet at least.) It was intense, but still brief, meeting, 5-6 months ago, whereby Franky was far more memorable acting as unhinged as he was. Yor also seems to consider things done once they’re over. And it was a wildly different context in which she saw Chadwick again, he was not acting in any way threatening, and she was also feeling self-conscious, which is to say, self-focused. Yor is also virtually never at risk, she is almost always the most dangerous person in any room; there isn’t cause for her to be hyper-vigilant in the way Twilight is, and no reason for her to be vigilant in these specific circumstances. I don’t think it stretches credulity that she wouldn’t recognise Chadwick, even if the circumstances were substantially more to her favour… Would I have believed it if she did remember him? Sure! Though to be honest, I think that may actually cause me to raise my eyebrow a bit, though I’d accept it. I equally find it believable that she didn’t, and don’t think that’s unrealistic or uncharacteristic.

I don’t think that flanderizes her (I’m afraid I don’t see what character traits are being exaggerated or simplified 🤔) and I don’t think it makes her look like an idiot either... In my opinion there is also nothing in the narrative text itself that indicates the narrative thinks or encourages readers to think she’s an idiot for not remembering Chadwick. That reading to me seems potentially to be putting too much emphasis on a single incident, and a single incident that I don’t think was ever intended to loom as large by way of a reflection of Yor’s character (death of the author notwithstanding.) Granted, Anon, you do note that there are other moments that have felt belittling/like flanderization to culminate in your frustration at this point; I take and acknowledge that. For me, Yor has shown a great deal of growth, especially in these last few arcs. They’ve centred on relational growth, via Yor engaging with the world around her in a way that is not familiar to her, deliberately going outside of her comfort zone and pushing her own boundaries. Awkwardly maybe but still bravely, and including finding slower and more circumspect ways to protect those she loves that never would have occurred to her before having these experiences. She also had important moments of agency that demonstrated her character development. All of which to say, I struggle to know where to hook in for the argument that there is a possible pattern of flanderization or belittling.

The other aspect is, and I won’t say this is what you’re doing, Anon, because I can’t know for certain, but based on some of what I’ve read around fandom regarding this arc, I differ from and would actually suggest that there may be some misunderstanding on the purpose of it. That doesn’t mean its purpose is exculpatory of your complaints, but it’s another point that is important to establish here. The goal of the arc was giving Twilight a concentrated tasting menu of many of the things best placed to push him over the edge: his panicking that Yor may recognise Cpt Curtis was another helping, in this instance Twilight putting himself into a tizzy, rather than the narrative (or Twilight) trying to say anything about Yor herself. This arc centred on Twilight, he was the focal character, and so it was driven by his thoughts/reactions/etc. Ymmv, and it seems we may differ on this point, but Endo isn’t a wasteful storyteller. Just see how this came back 100+ chapters after it happened! If I were to pivot this moment for Yor and share my theory, the important thing here, imo, is that the real Chadwick is now on Yor’s radar. It wouldn’t be strange for them to meet again — and for perhaps Yor’s memory of him to come back when it is, crucially, more important to her arc, not Twilight’s. This is pure speculation at this point, but I personally anticipate Yor’s Garden arc to dovetail with Yuri’s SSS arc, and so it would be far more impactful for that to happen when 1. she is of focus (or at a stretch, Yuri is), and 2. it therefore alerts Yor to the fact that the SSS is in Yuri’s orbit. That is when your ideas as to what Yor may think/do would come into play. But this arc wasn’t centred on Yor, or Yuri, and so it would have derailed the arc’s thrust to pull focus to it (and also likely wouldn’t have explored it adequately, for that same split-focus reason.) Instead, to me, this was setting up for the future. It was foreshadowing.

Narratively speaking, Twilight being hospitalised IS him being punished. He ends up there at least in part because he hoisted himself on his own petard by spiralling about Yor. In my opinion, the thing he is facing consequences for is not his tactics though, but rather the reasons he did those things… That he chose not to trust Yor, and relatedly, overruled his own self-described intuition, because actually he does trust Yor. That’s coming back around now when he’s being confronted once again with his feelings for/about Yor, which (as far as we know) he keeps avoiding. Because the reality is: all the rest of his concerns at that party were absolutely founded. We saw it: throughout the arc, there were many, many, many allusions to the violence and casual abuse of power exerted at and within the SSS, often for petty reasons, and openly, flagrantly. Taking Twilight for who he is to the SSS, their number one target, they’d likely shed the casualness of the cruelty and violence into something far sharper: he was right to be scared out of his mind.

On the specific topic of Twilight attempting to tranquillize Yor, the important barometer for me is that I think Yor would have come to the exact same conclusion, in a comparable situation, where their roles were reversed. And I think her method of knocking Twilight out would have been (necessarily) more violent and painful. To that point, I wouldn’t condemn Yor for it (even if I would wince as she cracked Twilight over the head) and I don’t actually see any issue with Twilight’s choice in this context either. And truthfully, I don’t think Yor would either, in finding out about it later? It was an extremely dangerous situation, and had the tranq worked, he expected harm would be minimal to none. I reluctantly confess that I… genuinely find the fandom upset on this one confounding 😅

And also, in this case, he did try subtler routes first, and I think the whole scenario typifies the ongoing deception between Yor AND Twilight, and so Twilight not being able to be forthright with Yor (and also, Yor not being forthright with Twilight for her reasons for wanting to stay!) Which circles back to the reason for his panic in the first place: manifesting because he didn’t trust himself about trusting Yor. Which actually is the rational choice in his position as a spy! But if his arc is partially about learning to return to his heart, then that failure to trust is the greater failure, than his failure as a spy.

If we were in conversation anon, I’d ask in what ways traits of Yor’s were done a disservice by moments of ignorance (though I’d say naïveté personally) to understand better, but we’re not, so I’m going to just dive into this one. In approaching any TwiYor/Forger adult arc, I bear in mind that Yor and Twilight are narratively, structurally, opposite equals. They meet in the middle where their values align, prime amongst them, compassion, a desire to better the world to keep others safe/so their loved ones don’t have to make the sacrifices they did, a recognition that their own work should not be something everyone (or ideally anyone else) does and equally that their methods get results in the world such as they know it, and that the civilian world they’re working to create or protect isn’t one that they anticipate being able to enjoy. From there, we have Yor with arguably too little knowledge and Twilight with arguably too much; Yor with too little world experience and Twilight with too much; Twilight as too immediately suspicious/grumpy with things and Yor too immediately accepting/content with things; Twilight sidelining emotion and Yor feeling keenly; Yor embracing her own feelings relatively easily, and Twilight ending up in hospital because he might recognise but cannot permit his own… that’s been the set up from the start, and one of Yor’s character theses is in her first chapter, crudely summed in the line: “I can’t figure out if this is the sharpest woman I’ve ever met, or the dumbest.” She’s both! Her “dumbness” comes from her inexperience and naïveté, which she is quickly and readily shedding the more she moves through the world, and which we see on regular display; and that leads to her sharpness. That sharpness allows her to adapt and learn as quickly as she is, folding her experiences into herself in a way which doesn’t alter her at her core, but rather enriches her, and, secondarily, allows her to see through Twilight to his core, unmasking him.

And… Yor is ditzy. I actually really, really love that. It’s rare to have a ditzy woman character who isn’t herself the punchline, and is respected for exactly who she is by the narrative (rare such that I think I can name one other off the top of my head.) I feel it dovetails with SxF being a comedy: that gets referenced in fandom discourse a fair bit, when person A thinks person B is taking something too seriously, I think often intended in a “the curtains are blue” kind of a way that misses the point too (and does a disservice to comedy, frankly.) Because there is quite obviously a great deal of depth in SxF, in comedic moments and otherwise. The point of acknowledging that SxF is a comedy is that it will of course follow comedy norms, structures, beats… it isn’t comedic 100% of the time, of course; any number of arcs have not a lick of comedy. But equally those arcs needed to be earned, and they were earned by building stakes on the comedy side, and then grounding the narrative overall and the comedy itself in the sober. 

Circling back to Yor and ditziness and why that connects to SxF being a comedy… That means that some of the comedy around Yor relates to her ditziness. I’m stating the obvious, but because: Endo mines his characters for comedy as much as he mines them for anything else. To me, he’s writing a woman in her late twenties, exposed in experiencing much of the world for the very first time, and prone to panic and wonder in equal measure, and sometimes the narrative pokes fun at her. To me, the jokes are, the overwhelming majority of the time, actually loving. In the same way jokes poking fun at Twilight, Anya, Damian, Franky, Nightfall and Yuri are all usually loving. It's a formulation of joke that pokes the character and says gently, “don’t be so serious about this” and that is a part of the core of SxF. “It’s only volleyball. You survived a war.” “It’s only a crush. You survived a war.” “This is just life. It’s unfamiliar to you for being quotidian, but you’re doing fine.” This is all my read of course, but I don’t ever sense malice there, personally. The comedy is of course also multi-faceted, revealing things about the characters or their situations (as I referenced above, all those allusions/reveals re Dir. Wilker and his gross abuses of power were framed within jokes — and they were funny! And the truth there still remains horrific!) 

But so: Yor’s primary asset is her heart. She is opening her eyes to the world around her, and she’s growing, going through things as an adult that by rights she would have gone through in adolescence, and that’s a raw experience. She is scatterbrained and she does forget things, but the Chadwick stuff in the previous arc was never about her; it was about Twilight. When it comes around again, it will be about her: and my bet is that when that time comes, it will (ultimately) be sober. Because the comedy narrative will have earned its serious, for times like that. But we’re not at a serious point; it isn’t time yet for Yor to have a serious arc about Yuri and the SSS and Garden (my personal bet) or Twilight and the lies they’ve both told (another possibility). She isn’t ready; the story isn’t ready; the audience isn’t ready. And, at the end of the day, that’s just not the story Endo was telling in that arc.

I take your very kind words about my writing and my fic, and I truly do appreciate them and I’m very honoured that the fic (I’m assuming common love!) is important to you. It’s a fic from the core of my heart more than any other probably has been, and it’s… indescribably moving, when that can speak to someone else’s heart in some way. And also, with the fullness of goodwill, I would argue that the characterisation you love is drawn directly from the canon to the best of my ability, adapted to another medium which grants more space, with a different tone which is intentionally less comedic (largely because comedy isn’t my strong suit, tbh 😅) It may be that I failed in that goal, but that was my intention, because I have such deep love and regard for that original. (but, death of the author applies to me too!) I do and will vociferously argue (as above <3) that Endo takes care of each of his central characters, and is a master of his craft. But that doesn’t mean you have to like the form his care takes, nor his craft. Speaking for myself, I respect Endo and his work very much. Spy x Family is, as it is, by and large, very important to me. 

I truly am sorry that SxF is disappointing you as much as it is; I’ve been there with other fandoms, and it sucks and can be hard. So I hope you take good care, Anon! Give yourself time and space to grieve, if you need it, and taking at least a break from the manga canon sounds like a great idea. I’m glad you have other works you can turn to in the meantime, and I’m very moved that mine is one <3 

[lady-pendragon-9]

[aerequets]

oh geez

This is both extremely dramatic and also not canon-esque at all, like i dont see anything remotely like this happening, but it was fun. I do want to see them argue. Not only fight knives-and-guns-blazing, but like an ideological crossroads. In this case: their approaches to their life views. Aside from the obvious ideologies they've adopted from garden and wise, Twilight is very self-sacrificial, seeming not to care about the impact his death would have on those depending on him, putting everything in for the mission. On the other hand, Yor knows the importance of life, she had to live in order for her brother to live, she takes lives up-close so she knows their weight and how easily they can be snuffed out. Therefore, she's more careful about being able to make it home so that she can be there for her family.

with this most recent arc, even though she isn't getting a full view of how much harm he puts himself in, that last panel in the last chapter of him dragging himself in the hospital (although it was funny) kinda got me thinking. What if yor got an inkling of how little he cared for himself? and what if, when confronted about it, he refused to stand down?

also ideally they wouldn't be snogging right away after their first argument but. needs be

[o0kawaii0o]

For the Good Times

[unhappy-sometimes]

mhm.

(clean version under the cut)

while ur here u should check out the song i found by amber run. it’s pretty good, the first half anyway.

[muffindounat]

actual spoilers beware

fionas love language is letting twilight do whatever it takes to archive his dream, it’s her pride and she would do anything for that, even risking his death

she’s doing it because she idolizes him and values his image as the “perfect spy” more than his life or happiness, she’s loving the ideal she has of him, not necessarily what’s best for him.

yor wants to support loid, but she also wants to help him carry his burdens. she was literally carrying him back home, to the one place he feels safe and comfortable. i thinl yor’s approach is more genuinely caring because it values the person as much as their goal. supporting someone’s dreams doesn’t have to mean being indifferent to their safety. wanting to ease their burden and protect them can be a deeper expression of love

[yihsch]

Mission 2: The Date (part 4)

[Start] [Part 3] <- -> [Part 5]

To celebrate the 100th page they unlocked ✨️hand holding✨️

@witless-winion1 @im-not-a-porno @cyberghoulxxo @circuswitch @xtilminkj-re @y2kinnow @readerreadings02 @godsfavouriteamoebe @a-sociopath-do-your-research @chocolate-addicted @zarastrawberry

[lpham2525]

The Fiona Paradox

Having read this far into the Spy x Family manga, I'm starting to think that maybe Fiona doesn't really want to be with Twilight? Or maybe she likes the yearning of wanting to be with Twilight, but any time she gets close to the reality of it happening, she goes into Internal Panic Mode™, as evidenced by these scenes:

This makes me think that she's in love with the idea of being with Twilight, but has a meltdown every time it comes close to the real thing.

I also find it ironic that even though Fiona knows about the spy identity behind the Loid Forger persona, she has never been able to access the deeper parts of him, namely [Redacted].

While Fiona was trained under Twilight and has also seen several of his other personas, she places him on so high of a pedestal that she doesn't know much of the "real" him at all. Her "romantic feelings" are more like blind worship than true affection.

Meanwhile, Fiona has witnessed Twilight showing real emotion in playing the role of Loid Forger the Family Man™, something she has never seen in him before:

Moreover, even though Fiona has never seen any part of [Redacted], Yor has. The one time we see Twilight/Loid sharing a part of his past as [Redacted] was to Yor after their disastrous date. It was there, in a moment of vulnerability, that he related this about his mother.

More importantly, he did it not as a honeytrap ploy or spy tactic, but as a genuine, honest moment of opening up. This memory might have been something that he had repressed for years (if not decades), and instead of making up something related to "Loid Forger", [Redacted] shared a part of his true self.

And think about it: he did this without hesitation. No timer running in his head, no calculations, no cost-benefits analysis. None of that overthinking he does as a spy. Just sharing a tender, heartfelt memory that has stayed with him to this day.

This is something that Fiona has never witnessed, and I think it says a lot that Twilight opened up like this to his "fake-wife-needed-for-a-mission" (and one who had just kicked him in the face, no less) rather than a fellow WISE agent who arguably knows more of the "real" him than Yor does. Then again, I might be wrong. Fiona might just want something so badly (and wanted it for so long) that the possibility of it coming true is too much for her heart to handle. I mean, I myself have felt this way before (and probably other people have felt this as well) so it's not too much of a stretch to imagine this for a fictional character. But I guess my main point is that Fiona still holds Twilight to such a high standard that she fails to see the real him. If she were to see the "real" him, would she still feel the same way? Or would it even be possible for her to see the real man behind Twilight? Or will her delusional fantasies still rationalize everything he does as being "perfect" and make her "love" him all the more for his imperfections?

Just a thought.

[lpham2525]

The Fiona Paradox

Having read this far into the Spy x Family manga, I'm starting to think that maybe Fiona doesn't really want to be with Twilight? Or maybe she likes the yearning of wanting to be with Twilight, but any time she gets close to the reality of it happening, she goes into Internal Panic Mode™, as evidenced by these scenes:

This makes me think that she's in love with the idea of being with Twilight, but has a meltdown every time it comes close to the real thing.

I also find it ironic that even though Fiona knows about the spy identity behind the Loid Forger persona, she has never been able to access the deeper parts of him, namely [Redacted].

While Fiona was trained under Twilight and has also seen several of his other personas, she places him on so high of a pedestal that she doesn't know much of the "real" him at all. Her "romantic feelings" are more like blind worship than true affection.

Meanwhile, Fiona has witnessed Twilight showing real emotion in playing the role of Loid Forger the Family Man™, something she has never seen in him before:

Moreover, even though Fiona has never seen any part of [Redacted], Yor has. The one time we see Twilight/Loid sharing a part of his past as [Redacted] was to Yor after their disastrous date. It was there, in a moment of vulnerability, that he related this about his mother.

More importantly, he did it not as a honeytrap ploy or spy tactic, but as a genuine, honest moment of opening up. This memory might have been something that he had repressed for years (if not decades), and instead of making up something related to "Loid Forger", [Redacted] shared a part of his true self.

And think about it: he did this without hesitation. No timer running in his head, no calculations, no cost-benefits analysis. None of that overthinking he does as a spy. Just sharing a tender, heartfelt memory that has stayed with him to this day.

This is something that Fiona has never witnessed, and I think it says a lot that Twilight opened up like this to his "fake-wife-needed-for-a-mission" (and one who had just kicked him in the face, no less) rather than a fellow WISE agent who arguably knows more of the "real" him than Yor does. Then again, I might be wrong. Fiona might just want something so badly (and wanted it for so long) that the possibility of it coming true is too much for her heart to handle. I mean, I myself have felt this way before (and probably other people have felt this as well) so it's not too much of a stretch to imagine this for a fictional character. But I guess my main point is that Fiona still holds Twilight to such a high standard that she fails to see the real him. If she were to see the "real" him, would she still feel the same way? Or would it even be possible for her to see the real man behind Twilight? Or will her delusional fantasies still rationalize everything he does as being "perfect" and make her "love" him all the more for his imperfections?

Just a thought.