kt

as if

[twoy-deactivated20210730]

mood

[sicklesium-moved-deactivated201]

i dont get offended at white people jokes even though im white because: 

i can recognize white people as a whole have systemically oppressed POC in america, which is where i live 

most people when they make white people jokes only mean the shitty white people and i am not a shitty white person 

im not a pissbaby

[damncommunists-deactivated20180]

my white friends that have reblogged this give me life

[zelda-tempest]

4. Sometimes I am a shitty white person and the jokes remind me to FUCKIN STOP

[lallamariamhabibi]

If ur white and like this post I fux with u

[birdpapi-deactivated20171121]

^absolutely

[verdant-witch]

5. It’s hard to be offended when white people jokes involve bland food/tourist dads in socks and sandals/white girls in yoga pants obsessed with pumpkin spice/suburban PTA moms and other harmless and mostly true stereotypes while jokes about POC involve them being called thugs/criminals/slurs/uneducated/illegal immigrants.

[blackpoeticinjustice]

i fucks with u heavy if ur white and you reblog this

[sm0k3-ring-deactivated20160109]

6. They’re usually really fucking funny and don’t perpetuate stereotypes that will ever affect me economically, politically, or cause me any true harm, let alone create risks that “justify” my murder and/or death

[satyrical-prince]

Waits for my white mutuals to reblog😌

[anar-tea]

yesyesyesyes

[eggpla]

7. I still don’t know how to season chicken

[unpretty]

did cinderella ever talk to her man about his faceblindness

[bisexuhowl]

#'i met the perfect woman but it was a special occasion'#'so now wherever she is her makeup and hair are probably different'#'this is my nightmare'

[unpretty]

rip prince charming, who had to let the whole kingdom make jokes about his foot fetish for the rest of his life because every blonde with an updo looks basically the same as far as he can tell

[unpretty]

they call him prince charming because he’s always really polite to strangers to cover for the fact that he doesn’t know if he’s supposed to recognize them from somewhere and when you’re a prince that shit starts wars

[unpretty]

best part of this post is all the people with prosopagnosia confirming that they literally never questioned why the prince was incapable of hiring a sketch artist even in versions without masks/glamours

(ps here’s this)

[onebatch--twobatch]

PLEASE click the link

[alcrox]

Please, please, for the love of god, Click. The. Link.

[stream]

SpongeBob SquarePants S01E18a

[shock]

sorry i’m late the radio started playing that song i’m operantly conditioned to kill people to and it was just this whole thing 

[heli0s-writes]

[dankmemeuniversity]

[trillgutterbug]

all the movies and tv shows over the next few years that will have to decide if they’re canon compliant or a canon divergence no plague au

[cheese24k]

I would have aced biology if the teachers all taught the course like the narrator

[charisma-savingthrow-deactivate]

It’s like a rainbow…of ugly.

[piercingsandink]

Crying

[theimaginator-omniworld]

*Calmly* “Here, the angler fish compares its camouflaging skills to that of a flounder, also a master–”

*Not so calmly* “HOLY CRAP, did you– what the FU–?!?!”

[moonykins]

Here is a full playlist of all 25 “True Facts about x” videos Ze Frank has ever made. They’re all just as fantastic as this one. You’re welcome.

[theleafriday]

He’s the same guy who made that Thanksgiving Etiquette video, too

[studthismuffin]

He’s the voice of god

[unregistered-hypercam2-deactiva]

[valtsv]

my thoughts are like a clearance sale

[valtsv]

once it's gone it's gone

[speciesbarocus]

Roman mosaic floor discovered under a vineyard in Negrar di Valpolicella, Veneto.

[birdsquirrel]

#something about this really gets to me #how if you get enough dirt on your floor it just becomes the ground #and eventually someone is trying to farm in your living room

[highkeygay]

dustin brown wimbledon 2016, day 2

[c3po]

anyone else bummed they have 2 sleep alone tonight and uh not in some1s arms

[butchbellaswan]

dark hozier take me to hell

[chlobat]

Chaotic neutral hozier take me to lunch

[ruinedchildhood]

[xiaq]

Small Town Grocery Store Stories: LGBTQ+ friendly edition

Me: minding my own damn business in the grocery store

One of my students and a few of his teammates enter the dairy aisle. 

My student is holding hands with one of his teammates. 

My student: Oh hey, Professor X!

Me, who has both my student and his girlfriend in my class: …Hello

My student, looking at his hand-holding partner: Oh! Don’t worry. My girlfriend knows. Not that I’m cheating! I’m not cheating. I’m not gay.

Hand Holding boy: Not that being gay is a bad thing! It’s a good thing!

My student: Right! But no, listen. We aren’t together, we just hold hands in public sometimes.

Hand Holding Boy: Especially on Friday nights. And weekends. And at away games.

My student: Because sometimes people will say shit and then we can punch them! And if the fight started because someone was being homophobic, coach won’t get mad at us.

Hand Holding Boy: Always nice to punch a homophobe. And [gesturing to another boy in the group] maybe they’ll think twice about saying something to [other boy’s name] if he ever gets a boyfriend and wants to hold his hand for real. The Gay One, resigned but smiling: I’ve decided it’s sweet and not really fucking weird.

[the-long-gone-souls]

This is what “boys will be boys” is meant to be

[chaoticevilbean]

This is the best thing I’ve seen in a while.

[vinceaddams]

“lives in my head rent-free” is such a strange expression. Does anything in your head actually pay rent?

[defectivegembrain]

the little mouse who lives in my frontal lobe is my only source of income