Kill Me

Cricket/27/ They/Them God’s least favorite cancer patient

[ssmashingtime]

Rabbit's foot.

[wordfather]

idk if this is an usamerican thing or not but it always blows my mind as a small european country resident that yall have many names and types of apples???? what do you mean its not just red yellow or green??? why is it so complicated??? who is granny smith????

[wordfather]

'whats your favorite apple' 'red' 'no i mean like what type' '??????' actual conversatiom i've had with a mutual from usa

[wordfather]

THIRTY TWO??????

[phillyphillyphilly]

Listen that doesn’t even account for all the weird shit local farmers are getting up to.

May I present the best apple:

[wordfather]

the world is so big and beautiful

[minttttttttttttttttttttttttttt]

sorry but this video is like a parasitic species to me

[bruzum]

[deep-state-partisan]

[storm-of-feathers]

yeah yeah rainbow capitalism is bad and whatever but like. when I was a child, being pro gay was not the popular or lucrative choice. I'm happy that times have changed.

[storm-of-feathers]

I miss rainbow capitalism. I do. I miss when it felt like public opinion was still pro gay. I understand it was always an empty gesture, but it mattered in a sense of knowing how socially acceptable being queer is. If that makes sense.

[cheaphalloweencostume]

my family fucked up my life by using spoonerisms interchangeably with their true phrase counterparts since before i was born and now i can’t escape from instinctively saying shit like “im gonna shake a tower”

[cheaphalloweencostume]

oh “meeking a smee” made me feel like i was being fucking tazed

[cheaphalloweencostume]

theres a lot of people on this website who dont realize their dad is a gnome

[vedurnan-archive]

[kanahiko]

seepy cozy

[podracer]

Dune if I was in charge

[tariqah]

Americans be like: My grandpa 😠😠😠 served in the Korean War 😠😠😠 and killed 9 people 😠😠😠 to fund his college degree in clownery 😠😠😠 Respect him or leave the country 😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬

[username00000000001-blog]

That’s a super light story huh? My great grandfather got killed in action from a land mine to protect this country. If you don’t wanna respect the history or stand for a national anthem😁then leave to your peaceful home and fuck right off

[butchflirt]

How did your great grandpa stepping on a landmine protect this country

[zanabism-deactivated20200529]

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[glowingdepths]

They’re shoving me into the Blue Tube to give my chest some Beams

[glowingdepths]

Sometimes healing is blasting Limp Bizkit on your living room stereo max volume

[seasonforwonder]

can you people stop being gay? cut it out lol

[lego-in-my-foot]

FUCK YOU

[seasonforwonder]

what are you? gay?

[lego-in-my-foot]

You fucking wish. You just wish you were me.

[seasonforwonder]

oh yeah? oh yeah?

[lego-in-my-foot]

Yeah, you fucking stubborn asshole

[seasonforwonder]

*pushes you on to a locker and we passionately make out*

[lego-in-my-foot]

*doesn’t stop you*

[sushishorb]

Huh

[seasonforwonder]

im sorry did you need something you homophobe

[kotcelox]

I know 2 Super-Anxious species, one of them is known for it's fast running and the other... is too.

[grawly]

[glowingdepths]

Man.. fuck cancer dawg I’m over this shit. Fucking 2 year long battle so far.

[glowingdepths]

Just gotta get through radiation and fingers crossed, this is the end of this for good.